CHAPTER 6
KEATON
My consciousness comes back slowly. The fact that there’s no early morning alarm clock is both jarring and wonderful. It won’t be long before I have to get back into the groove of early mornings. I’m not looking forward to it.
I’ve never been a morning person. From what I knew of her, Gemma wasn’t either. I can’t imagine that changed.
As the weight and heat of her registers in my mind, along with the very unfamiliar but perfectly suited surroundings coming into focus, I freeze for a moment. Mentally, I’m bracing for the panic.
It doesn’t come.
But that’s what I should be feeling. Right?
Last night I showed up at the window of my best friend’s little sister. I climbed into her room. I undressed her. I made her come on my cock.
I should absolutely be panicking.
But all I feel is a sense of calm. It’s a serenity I’m not used to feeling.
She feels right in my arms. I want to wake up just like this every day for the rest of my life.
Now, when my thoughts turn to Gary, things get complicated. My heart starts to pound harder in my chest while picturing the look he’s going to have on his face when he finds out about this.
The man is liable to punch me. And I’ll let him, if it comes to that.
He might hold back, but I’m not going to bet on it. Not with how protective he’s been when it comes to Gemma. It’s been his life’s work to turn the heat up underneath any guy she’s looked at for more than a few seconds.
All of his friends would give him shit for it when we were growing up. He never let those jeers get under his skin.
He would just shrug and say, “She’s my sister.”
As if that was enough. As if it explained everything.
For Gary, I think it genuinely did.
Not everyone understood that about him, especially since he didn’t take many things seriously. When it came to Gemma, he was different. It’s a protectiveness engrained in him.
It’s never been directed at me. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to handle that kind of heat.
Not that there’s any way I can go back now. Even if I could, I don’t want to.
I know what it feels like to slide inside of her tight, wet heat now. I’ll never be able to forget. It would be a fucking shame if I did.
Gary is just going to have to get over it. I’m not letting Gemma go now. I warned her last night; hopefully, she took the words to heart because I meant them.
Instead of worrying about how Gary is going to react, I need to worry about how to tell him.
I look down at the woman in my arms and brush some of her hair out of her face.
Right now, it’s a light pink, a barely there color which catches the light and makes her look like she doesn’t belong to this world.
Her eyelashes flutter slightly and I find myself holding my breath as her eyes open. Her aqua-colored eyes blink up at me a few times. I watch in real time as she realizes exactly where she is.
I try not to laugh as her body locks up. I can see the war in her eyes. She’s not sure if she should throw herself at me or if she should push me away. I’m honestly not sure which way she’s leaning, and I don’t want to find out.
Her eyebrows pull together when my arms tighten around her. I’m not letting her go, even if she tries to push me away.
I’m self-aware enough to realize she has no reason to trust me. Not after the last few years and how far we’ve drifted away from each other.
Looking back, I think it’s what we needed. Without a little distance, I wouldn’t have been able to see her.
“Morning,” my voice is rough and still tinged with sleep.
“Good morning,” she squeaks.
So many emotions flash over her features. I soak up every single one of them. I haven’t been able to enjoy them in the last few years, but her face has always been expressive.
It made her a terrible liar while we were growing up; it was something I always found refreshing when around her. When did I forget about that?
“You look worried,” I prod her gently.
Gemma gnaws on her lower lip while looking up at me from underneath her lashes. “I am a little,” she whispers the words like she doesn’t want me to really be able to hear them.
From the way her cheeks turn pink, I know she’s embarrassed. It takes everything in me to stop myself from telling her how adorable she looks.
And sexy, I’m reminded as my gaze slides over her naked shoulder.
Knowing she’s completely naked and pressed against my body is almost too much for me to take. My cock throbs and I’m desperate to be buried inside her again.
Now is not the time for that.
Soon.
“What are you worried about the most?”
I can tell from the faraway look in Gemma’s eyes that she’s seriously considering my question instead of brushing me off. It’s a simple act of trust, easily given and taken away, but it settles something in me.
Her eyes close and I watch pain flit across her features. “That you’re about to take a breath and form a sentence containing the words regret or mistake.” My heart fucking aches when she shakes her head like those words are inevitable. “That’s the nightmare. Those words.”
“Gemma,” I call her name softly.
All she does is shake her head, this time more forcefully. She’s digging her heels in; it would be adorable if I didn’t need her to look at me.
I need her to see my eyes.
“Gemma,” my voice drops lower, “look at me.”
“I don’t want to, Keaton,” she sasses with a pout thrown in at the end.
“Do it anyway,” I command.
Finally, her eyes open. Slowly. But they open.
Her aqua-colored eyes hold me captive. I haven’t allowed myself to be close enough to appreciate them in far too long. They sparkle with something earned now, something which is only given when you’ve lived for yourself for a little while. It looks good on her.
“Being with you was not and will never be a mistake,” my words are earnest when she finally meets my gaze. “I do not regret it.”
“But aren’t you afraid of what Gary is going to say?” The question is filled with nervousness, but then I can almost see something like realization fill her face. “Or are you planning to never tell him?”
I can hear so much disappointment in her question and it guts me. Is that really what she thinks of me? Have I even given her a reason to think differently?
Even last night, when I showed up, I didn’t use the front door. Damn it, I might have fucked this up even more without even realizing it.
“No,” I bark out the word, and she startles slightly in my arms. I soften my tone slightly, “That is not what I meant at all.”
She looks at me and the uncertainty on her face feels like a knife piercing my skin. I push the feeling away because I’ve done nothing to earn her trust recently and I can’t keep expecting it when it is based on a past I’ve basically ignored for years.
“You are not anyone’s secret,” my words are fierce like they’re forged in steel and resolve.
Maybe they are.
“I am afraid of what Gary is going to say,” I admit to her because I need to be honest.
I’ve already wasted too much of her trust in me.
It wasn’t all that strong to begin with, not with how long I had allowed it to wither away because I wasn’t willing to acknowledge what lives and breathes in the connection between us.
I have no idea how I could have forgotten something so important, but here we are.
What I can’t afford to be is dishonest. I can’t spin the truth to make it easier to swallow. I’ll only end up pushing her away farther and the thought of that happening to us makes my stomach churn.
“Of course I’m afraid of losing a life-long friendship.”
Gemma frowns and narrows her eyes as she studies me. I don’t know what she’s looking for and I’m not sure what she sees. I’m afraid to ask.
“I get it,” her words are wounded and low, as if saying them too loudly will break her.
She lets out a soft gasp when I roll us and position myself above her. Her aqua eyes are wide and filled with a mix of wariness and desire.
“I don’t think you do get it.” I shake my head and hope she can see my sincerity. “Of course I’m afraid of losing him. He’s the friend I’ve had in my life the longest. That doesn’t mean you aren’t worth the risk. You are.”
Gemma’s eyes turn glassy and I have to swallow hard to try and get past the emotion forming a lump in my throat.
I understand why she’s on the verge of tears.
The thought that no one else has told her she’s worth it—worth the fight, worth the risk, worth being the reason for every breath—is heartbreaking.
“How can you be so sure?” Even as she asks the question, her mouth turns down at the corners like she doesn’t really want to know the answer.
“Because of how I feel when I’m around you. It’s easy, but exciting. It’s interesting, but familiar. I like the way I feel around you and I like the way you glow around me.”
Gemma giggles and presses her hands to her cheeks. “I glow around you?” When I nod, a note of wonder enters her voice, “I never knew that.”
“You do now.”
I kiss her softly, needing the connection, needing to feel her give way underneath me. Even though I should let go of her because I’m sure she has work to do and I have my own research to do, the last thing I want to do is get out of this bed.
As if she can read my mind, her small hands push against my shoulders while she scrunches up her face. “I need to get up and get my day going. I have work to do.”
When I grin down at her, she blinks at me. She might not trust me completely, but she’s not arguing with me about my intentions or what I’m willing to accept by being with her. I’ll just have to prove to her that she can trust in my words.
I’m fast when I climb out of bed and then turn around to scoop my Gem up in my arms. She lets out a surprised yelp as her arms wrap around me. Her fingers sift through the hair at the nape of my neck, and it causes my dick to pulse.
It’s already a struggle being around her. Having her touch me? It’s almost too fucking much.
Her laughter fills the bathroom as I set her back on her feet.
My eyes stray down to her tits for a second before I flip the water on in the shower.
The space is surprisingly spacious considering the size of her home, but I’m not going to complain about it.
The water doesn’t take long to heat up and then I’m pulling Gemma into the shower with me.
Water cascades down her body, the rivulets drawing my eyes and making pre-cum weep from the crown of my cock. Her aqua eyes slide down my body and widen slightly as she takes me in. My hands glide over her skin as I map her curves.
“This is a sight I could get used to,” my words come out as a whisper.
Her body arches into my hold, pressing closer, seeking more of my warmth and the roughness of my hands. My fingers curl around her hips and I lift her up while pressing her back against the tiles. I swallow down the gasp that falls from her lips as I press my mouth to hers.
Gemma kisses me fiercely and her nails dig into my shoulders. My length slides along her slick pussy lips and the crown taps against her clit. Her hips twitch in search of more contact, more friction.
The crown of my cock finds her entrance, and I slide deep inside of her in one sure thrust. Her thighs tighten around my hips, and something breaks inside me. I press her harder against the wall while my hips pound into her.
“Keaton,” my name falls from her lips like a prayer and a plea.
Her voice spurs me on while I grunt, “You feel so good wrapped around me. I can feel how close you are. Don’t hold back; let yourself go.” I slam into her and growl as her walls tighten. “I’ve got you.”
When her lips part, a cry falls from them. I watch as she falls apart in my arms. The way she milks me has my balls drawing up. My heart pounds in my chest as I fill her completely and let myself go.
Air is sawing in and out of our lungs, while my head rests in the crook of her neck. “I could never regret this,” I murmur against her skin.
Her limbs tighten around me, and something feels like it clicks into place between us. Maybe it’s just an understanding. Maybe it’s more.
She’s given me a little bit of trust. I’m not going to squander it.