Chapter 15
Opinion: No opinion.
—Delilah Dune, opinion writer
L yla tossed and turned, trying to get comfortable in the small tent with Travis. “If you have an RV, why don’t we use it when we camp? Technically, staying in an RV is considered camping, right?”
Travis rolled toward her in the small quarters. “Not if one lives in an RV. Delilah is my home, Ly, so it’s not camping to sleep inside. Camping is staying in a tent and being uncomfortable on the ground. It’s going without the convenience of a bathroom.”
“And where is the glamour in that?” she mumbled.
Travis laughed into the darkness before rolling onto his back and staring up at the nylon ceiling. He put his arms behind his head, propping himself up, his elbow touching Lyla’s hair as it fanned out beneath her head. “Who said anything about glamour?”
She blew out a breath. “If this was a date between me and you, I’m sure my questions would be raising all kinds of red flags, right?”
“Good thing it’s not a date then, huh?” he said without answering the question.
“Good thing.” She tried to close her eyes, but she thought maybe she was lying on a few pointy rocks. The ground was hard, her body was uncomfortable, and the sounds beyond the nylon enclosure were too loud. She knew that Travis was pranking her earlier, but she still wondered if there was a coyote or wolf or even a bear wandering around. She could also hear Travis breathing beside her, the sound steady and constant.
Lyla listened, subconsciously matching her breaths to his. Eventually, since neither of them was talking anymore, she began to drift off, vaguely aware of the hard earth beneath her back and the warm body that she absolutely could not cuddle up to snoring beside her.
“Do you remember that last summer?”
Lyla was about to drift away into sleep. “Hmm?” She was half alert, but barely.
“I knew you had just a couple more weeks until you went off to college, and I felt this urgency. I had this now-or-never feeling, like I was about to lose the best part of me, and I had no idea what to do.”
The silence drifted between them.
“I thought I felt something between us,” he said quietly. “I wanted to say something. I wanted to kiss the girl.”
Lyla had felt something too. “You never said anything.”
“I wanted to. There was this night that I had amped myself up to tell you. Then you said something. You made a point of telling me you thought all those people choosing love over life were crazy. A lot of our classmates were getting married straight out of school. Basing their college decisions on their boyfriends and girlfriends. Do you remember that?”
“I remember.” She remembered the exact conversation, word for word. Something inside her could feel that Travis was about to tell her something that would change things, and she’d felt an urgency too. Her urgency was to stop him, though.
Travis continued. “You said love was a stumbling block that trapped people from their true purpose in life.”
“I guess I was a little dramatic back then, huh?”
His elbow knocked against her. “Back then?” He chuckled quietly. “I would have stumbled and fallen for you, Ly. I didn’t have those same big plans like you did, though, so stumbling wouldn’t have been quite as tragic.”
“Most of those couples that married straight out of high school didn’t even last,” she pointed out. “Look at Allison and Ernie.”
“I don’t know. I think we would’ve been different. Maybe. Who knows?” He laughed again, but the sound struck her as odd. “We had different paths, and I came to my senses that night. It wasn’t like I was losing you forever, right? You’d be back for fall break, winter break. That’s what I told myself, at least. Because the thought of losing my best friend forever would have killed me.”
A tear slipped from the corner of her eye, crossing the bridge of her nose and dripping onto the tent’s floor as she rolled to her side. “I’m sorry, Travis,” she whispered. She’d apologized before, but this time she felt the regret deep within her soul.
When he didn’t respond, she leaned closer, trying to catch a glimpse of him in the dark. “Trav?”
His breathing was steady and deep. Seriously? He’d just poured his heart out and now he was already asleep? How did men do that?
She lowered herself back to her side of the tent, fully awake, no thanks to Travis’s confessions in the dark. What did he want her to say? Choosing love at eighteen would have been crazy. Was she supposed to have chosen him over college? Closing her eyes, she forced her thoughts away, focusing on her breathing. Focusing on Travis’s breathing. Focusing on anything except what might have been.
The dream started again, almost exactly where it had left off when Travis had stirred her awake earlier in the day.
Teenage Lyla stood there on the diving board, heart pounding, blood rushing. Her vision went black, and she suddenly lost all control of her body. The world disappeared until, the next second, she hit the water with a cold splash. She felt frozen and unable to do anything except regret the decision to step on the Pirate’s Plank this afternoon. She also regretted coming to Memory Lake.
Her body descended into the depths of the lake, going down, down, down, until finally buoyancy took over, and she started to rise again, her arms and legs flailing. There was no grace to her movements. If she had to guess, one leg was going right and the other was going left, while one arm was going forward and the other was reaching backward. This was not the lifesaving measures she’d learned in swim class all those summers ago.
Breaking through the surface of the water, her mouth popped open and gasped for air. Just as soon as she rose to the surface and got a mouthful of air, her body went under again and she accidentally swallowed water. She went up and down, up and down, breathing air and swallowing water as her limbs continued to flail without any rhyme or reason.
This was it. She was going to drown. Everyone who’d watched her jump off the Pirate’s Plank was probably laughing at her right now. Bernie was likely laughing—while Lyla was maybe dying. At fifteen.
Her life flashed before her eyes. It was a quick flash, because she’d barely done any living to this point. If she had played it safe and had stayed in the shallow water, she would have been fine.
One risky move.
Lyla felt a hand grab her, pulling her to the surface again. She couldn’t see when she came up. There was too much water in her eyes, and she was too busy trying to breathe.
“Stupid kid.” A man clutched her to his body as he waded through the water.
Lyla allowed her body to go limp in his arms. She’d exerted all her energy, and now that she was safe, presumably, she couldn’t seem to move. She just allowed herself to be carried to shore, promising herself she’d never do that again. She would never again allow herself to get in over her head.
Her body was tossed onto the shore, and pain seared the side of her right knee where a rock was jutting out of the ground. “Ow,” she groaned, still choking on lake water.
“Sorry, kid.” The man didn’t stay to make sure she was okay. He’d done his good deed.
Opening her eyes, she blinked past the sting of dirt and sun, watching the back of the man walk away from her. Then she looked down at her knee where a large gash was spurting blood. She felt lightheaded and nauseous.
Someone walked up to her and knelt. “Are you okay?”
Lyla blinked the girl into focus. Bernie. “Oh. Um, yeah,” she stammered. “I’m fine. I think I just got too hot up there or something.” No way was she going to admit she passed out from fear. She was never admitting that to anyone.
She was pretty sure she had passed out, but not because of the heat. She’d been terrified standing on that plank, and that fear had gotten the best of her. She’d gone off the diving board like she’d wanted to, but it hadn’t been on her own terms.
Bernie’s face contorted with concern. “You’re bleeding.”
“Yeah, there was a rock. It’s fine.” The humiliation had hurt more than the laceration.
Bernie ignored Lyla’s unconvincing lie. “You should apply some pressure on that.”
“Don’t jump if you can’t swim,” someone said as they walked by.
Lyla’s cheeks flared hot.
“Ignore them. You can swim, right?” Bernie asked.
“Yeah. I mean, kind of.” Lyla still wasn’t feeling well. She just wanted to disappear. She wanted to go home where it was safe and where no one would point or laugh. “I’ve got to go.” She climbed to her feet and stood on wobbly legs.
“I’ll see you here tomorrow?” Bernie asked.
“Yeah. Of course.” But Lyla hadn’t gone back for a multitude of reasons, all valid. The number-one reason being that she liked breathing. She liked living too. She didn’t like being afraid.
Lyla stirred, the nylon tent rustling quietly beneath her. Her eyes opened and squinted against the sunshine peeking through the tent’s tiny window. Travis was no longer lying next to her. “Travis?” She sat up and leaned her head out the tent’s open flap, looking in all directions.
“Hey, sleepyhead.” He was sitting in one of the chairs they’d sat in last night, drinking a cup of coffee.
“Is there more of that?” she asked before breaking into a yawn.
“Of course. Want some?”
“I would love some.” She crawled out and stood stiffly, stretching her body in all directions.
“Were you having a nightmare?” he asked, glancing over.
“Was I talking in my sleep?” she asked, taking the chair next to his.
“You were flailing and gasping for air. I figured you were having some kind of dream. Were you having the one about Memory Lake again?”
“How’d you know?”
“I remember that dream always plagued you. You’re still having it, huh?”
“Not until recently. I guess being in Echo Cove has made it come back.” She blew out a breath, letting her eyes adjust to the morning light. “You didn’t wake me up this time.”
“I’m a big believer that at some point, you have to finish out the nightmare. Otherwise, your mind will keep going there. It ends well enough, right? You didn’t die that day.”
Lyla blew out a breath and took the cup of coffee he handed her. “Only my pride. And I injured my knee.” She took a sip. “Mm, this is really good.”
“Camping coffee is always better than regular coffee. It’s a fact.” He watched her as she took another sip. “I was going to wake you up if you went much longer. I have a job to get to this morning.”
“Oh.” Lyla felt disappointed. She was enjoying the morning and the unexpected peace that came with being out in the woods with no set agenda before her. “Sorry. It took me a while to get to sleep last night. The tent isn’t the most comfortable place.”
“Being uncomfortable isn’t a bad thing.” Travis tipped his mug toward his lips. “It can be positive.”
Lyla let out a humorless laugh. “Well, it doesn’t feel positive when a rock is poking your hip in the middle of the night.” She drank more of her coffee. “I can be ready to head back as soon as possible.”
“Just need to break down the tent and load it all in the back of the truck. I was thinking maybe after my jobs today, we could meet back up. Maybe hang out.”
Lyla sipped her coffee. “I can’t. I have plans with Allison.”
Travis’s brow furrowed, making deep creases along his forehead.
“What? I thought you preferred your alone time these days, anyway.”
“Alone with you is nice too,” he said. “What are you two doing?”
Lyla cleared her throat. “We’re going to a bar to pick up guys.”
“Seriously? You’re choosing to go to a bar rather than hang out with me?”
She wasn’t sure if his wounded expression was a tease or real. “Yeah. We’re both single, although Allison has some mystery guy she sees sometimes. She says it’s not serious, so we’re going out for a girls’ night.”
“To pick up guys. I don’t know, Ly. Two beautiful women getting drunk by themselves . . .”
Lyla rolled her eyes. “Since when did you become sexist?”
“I’m not sexist. I’m protective. And maybe a little bit jealous, if I’m honest.”
Lyla lifted her brows over her cup of coffee. “Jealous?”
“Allison is stealing away my best friend position.”
Lyla looked away. “Right.”
“Were you hoping I’d be jealous of the guys you’re picking up?”
She waved a hand, feeling all kinds of foolish. “I may have misunderstood.”
“I’d be jealous of them too, if I didn’t know which guys frequent the local bar around here.”
Lyla folded her arms over her chest. “How would you even know that? You don’t live in Echo Cove anymore.”
“I’m not jealous, just concerned for you and Allison. Maybe I should stop in after the jobs I’ve lined up.”
Lyla set her cup of coffee down on the ground beside her. “Unh-uh. You’re not invited.”
“You might need a designated driver. I have a truck.”
Lyla sighed in exasperation. “We are grown women having a women’s night. No men invited.”
“But you just said you’re going out to pick up men,” Travis pointed out.
“Men. Not you. You’re a man, but we’re not picking you up. You’re disqualified,” Lyla clarified.
“Fine.” He reached for his coffee cup. “I’ll just go back to my RV after my jobs. Alone.”
Lyla wasn’t falling for his guilt trip. “Perfect.”
“Perfect,” he grumbled before sliding her a teasing look. “I hope you two have a great time. Without me.”
August 7
Dear Diary,
As the summer fades, all I know is, some part of me wants time to stop while another part wants it to speed up. I’m nervous about the future, but also excited. I’m ready for everything except saying goodbye to Travis.
Some foolish part of me thought he was going to tell me that he had feelings for me the other day. There was this vibe between us and he seemed to be leading a conversation in that direction. Then it just stopped, and he returned to his normal, joking self. It could have been in my big imagination.
I wanted him to say something in that line of thinking, but honestly, that’s the worst thing that could ever happen because then I’d have to choose. Surely, you can’t have both. An out-of-state dream college and a boyfriend in the middle of Nowheresville, North Carolina.
Sonny got out again tonight, but not to ruin my mom’s flowers. Instead, he came over and casually sat with me on the porch while I cried. I spilled my guts to that dog, things that only this diary and Ms. Hadley’s little Yorkie knows. Maybe I’ll get a dog one day. Falling in love with a person can wreck your plans, but a dog, I think that’s pretty safe.
Lyla