Chapter 7
Chapter Seven
HAZEL
B rady stood at the grill, watching the kabobs cook while I threw together a salad in his kitchen.
Even though I lived here now, I still thought of everything as his.
This wasn't my kitchen. We weren't new roommates.
This was temporary. As soon as his show got the family-friendly designation, then I'd move back to my apartment.
I always thought I'd own a home by now. One that was near the beach if not on it. But my dream drifted further away.
But here, with Brady, I should pretend for a little while that his house was mine. That I lived on the beach. Max seemed to have no problems with that as he was outside sniffing the sand, content to be here with Brady and me.
Brady opened the slider and asked, "Is the salad almost done?"
"Bringing it outside now," I said brightly, determined to act like everything was normal and that I wasn't freaking out about this arrangement.
I was going to be sleeping in the same bed with Brady. Even though it was a king-size mattress, it was inevitable that we'd touch each other in the middle of the night.
Although I wasn't sure I'd be able to relax enough to sleep. I understood why it made more sense to share a bed when his family visited. But I wasn't sure I'd be able to control myself or my attraction to him.
Brady slid the door open for me as I stepped past him, my shoulder brushing his chest. I sucked in a breath, trying to think about anything other than how good it felt to be this close to him. The idea of this being real was a dangerous proposition. One where I was destined to get hurt.
"I opened a white wine for us to celebrate moving in together."
"Do we need to celebrate?" I couldn't help but ask.
Brady's forehead creased. "Of course. We have the engagement party to look forward to, and then the wedding itself."
I rolled my eyes as he poured the wine into two glasses. "Now I know you're teasing."
He lifted his glass and clinked it against mine. "Welcome home, fiancée."
" Fiancée. That has a nice ring to it," I murmured as I sipped the dry wine.
Brady winked at me. "I think so too."
He turned back to the grill, and I wondered how he could be so nonchalant about this. It felt huge to be moving in together, even if it was just a role we were playing.
He turned the kabobs over, the smell making my stomach rumble.
"We don't have to have dinner together every night. We just need to pretend in front of other people," I said as a way of creating necessary boundaries.
Brady was quiet, placing the kabobs on the serving dish, then carrying it over to the table. "I think this will work if we're all in. It won't be acting then."
I pursed my lips. "Maybe."
"Besides, we're friends. Living together will be natural. Maybe when this is over, you can move into Dalton's room and save up for your beach house." He used tongs to place the kabob on my plate.
I dished out the salad into two bowls. "We both know I'll never be able to afford a real beach house."
Brady frowned. "It's unfortunate that housing has gotten so expensive."
"It would be weird if we were still living together after we broke up." And then I frowned. "I could live with one of my friends. At least until all of them pair off and get married."
Brady sat across from me. "I still believe you can have anything you want."
Everything I wanted was right here. Brady, Max, this house. If I focused on that, I was content.
We bit into our kabobs.
"This is delicious."
"We can work out a schedule for dinner. Either one of us handling it or cooking something together."
"That sounds nice." I'd been living alone for a long time. It would be an adjustment living with someone, coordinating our lives.
"I have to be at work early," Brady said. "I'm usually gone by six thirty or so."
"I'm going to walk on the beach with Max every morning and evening." Who knew how long I would have this opportunity?
"I can join you in the evenings."
"I'm sure you'll want to go out and hang out with your brothers."
"Not every night."
"What else will change?" I asked quietly, feeling nervous about our relationship. "This won't ruin our friendship, will it?"
Brady sobered and reached across the table to hold my hand. "I won't let that happen."
That only placated me slightly. No one could promise that. "We'll work hard to maintain our friendship, which means having movie nights."
He grinned. "I'm game for that."
We finished eating while the fan whirled overhead. Then we cleaned up together. It felt very domestic. I grabbed Max's leash. "I'm going to take him for a walk."
"I'll go with you," Brady insisted, and my heart warmed.
How was I going to survive even a few weeks of this? Sharing a home with him was making this attraction to him harder to manage.
We walked the narrow path to the beach. "I'll never get tired of this."
Brady nodded, his hands in his pockets. "Even though we grew up here, I don't take it for granted."
Max ran in front of us, sniffing one thing or the other.
Brady pulled his hand out for the leash. "Let me."
I gave it to him, and then he reached for my hand, tucking it into his.
"Is this part of it?" I asked.
"We should be affectionate in public. People will expect it."
I nodded, trying not to notice how my heart fluttered when his palm was pressed against mine.
My heart was sinking faster than my feet in the soft sand.
I tried to focus on the warm sand beneath my feet and the breeze in my hair.
Not the way his hand squeezed mine from time to time.
Or how he'd look over at me as if he was worried I'd disappear at any second.
I was probably imagining that though. This was a means to an end. Not the beginning of something amazing. But I couldn't help but wonder: if this was real, how would I feel?
My heart fluttered faster at the idea. I felt like I could take off and fly at any second. Nothing could touch me.
"This is nice," Brady murmured.
"It is." I wasn't sure if he was referring to the night itself, the beach, or the fact that we were together, holding hands.
An elderly couple walked past us and smiled. The woman said, "You two make a sweet couple."
"Thank you," I said as they continued on.
He nudged me with his shoulder. "See? We need to be seen together more often."
The reminder that this wasn't real brought me back down to earth. More weighed down. How long could I play this game before I got hurt?
"You and Max belong on the beach."
But that statement didn't change our reality. I lived in an apartment on the other side of the island, nowhere close to the beach. The island was for rich people and tourists. Not for a librarian struggling to get by. But I didn't want Brady to feel sorry for me.
"What were you talking about with Cooper earlier?"
"Oh, I wanted to start a new program after school.
The kids could come to the library after school, do their homework, pick out a few books, play games until their parents can pick them up.
It's something I'd like to offer as a free program.
But I think we'll need to provide snacks and maybe get a few new games and puzzles.
Maybe even more staff. I'm trying to work out the details so I can present it to the board. Funding is an issue."
"That sounds like something that would be welcomed by parents who work, can't afford an aftercare program, and don't want to leave their kids alone after school."
"There's a little more red tape than I was expecting. The library is worried about money and staffing. How it would work, etc."
"If there's anything I can do, let me know."
"That's nice of you. But I'll figure it out."
"We each have our pet projects that we work on the side. Hudson mentors a local boy, Shep works with the senior center with their landscaping, Dalton tutors with the youth program."
"You don't have anything?"
"I've been busy with the video-game show. Dad likes to say I spend all my time playing video games."
"That's not fair."
"He doesn't know what I'm actually doing."
I hated that for him. That he didn't feel like he could be honest with his father. It was a good reminder that I was here to help him and maybe even strengthen his relationship with his dad.
"But I'd love to help make your program happen. If you need money, we'd be happy to donate it."
I stopped walking and faced him. "Are you serious?"
His forehead wrinkled. "We're engaged now. Your pursuits are important to me."
I looked around and lowered my voice. "But we're not really engaged."
"Hazel, you've been my best friend since we were kids. I want to make you happy."
I nodded, the warmth ebbing slightly. He was doing this because we were friends. "Of course. Yeah, that would be great. I'll do anything to make this happen. I want to create a nice place for kids to come, get their work done. I want to ease parents' minds."
"Let me know when you need the money, and if you need us to be physically present for anything."
"I don't think that will be necessary. Unless you want to see the program in progress."
"That would be nice."
"I can make that happen." I grinned, and we continued walking. Even if he was doing this because of our friendship, I was still grateful. This had been a dream of mine for a long time.
We turned around and headed back to Brady's house. I guess I'd have to start thinking of it as mine for now.
We cleaned our feet off in his outdoor shower and then headed inside.
"I'm going to take a shower," Brady said, and the thought of us sharing a bathroom seemed intimate. This wasn't like our usual time together. I'd always gone home at the end of the night. Even if I fell asleep, Brady would wake me up so I could drive home.
We headed toward the bedroom, and I sat on the bed while Brady moved around the room, gathering clothes.
His nightstand had a book on it. One I'd recommended to him the last time he stopped by the library. "Are you enjoying the thriller?"