Chapter 32
JACK
‘I hate math.’
‘Don’t say that.’
‘But I do.’
I paused from wiping the bar. ‘Come on, Oscar, you know this stuff. We covered it last week. Read me the question again.’
He sighed. ‘Luke went to Captain’s Scoops to buy some ice cream. He ordered two scoops of chocolate, one scoop of vanilla, and three scoops of strawberry. How many scoops did he get in total? And if a scoop costs $1, how much money did Luke spend?’
‘OK, so it’s basic addition. Think about it. Read the question again if you have to. Slowly.’
I watched his little face frown as he stared at the page in front of him.
His mouth moved as he silently worked it out.
Fiona, was waiting tables so I’d offered to watch him at a table close to the bar.
His grandmother babysat him as often as she could, but sometimes, like tonight, she couldn’t, and Fiona was left with no other option than to bring him to work.
‘Six scoops?’
‘Right.’ I beamed at him. ‘You got it. Now, how much did he spend?’
He read the problem again. ‘I don’t know.’
‘Don’t be afraid to have a guess, Oscar. You won’t be in any trouble if you’re wrong. It’s how we all learn.’
He sighed. Stared at the page for a while. ‘Six dollars?’
‘Exactly. I told you math is easy when you focus on the problem.’
‘No, you said math is fun. And you’re wrong about that.’
I laughed. ‘You’ll get the hang of it. And if you don’t end up liking math, that’s OK. But you need to know this stuff.’
He rolled his eyes at me. ‘Why? That’s what phones are for.’
‘You can’t always rely on technology. What if you were in the middle of the bush somewhere, and you had no phone.’
‘Why would I need to do math in the middle of the bush?’
He had me there. ‘I don’t know, but just trust me. You need to know this stuff. The basics, at the very least.’
‘Fine. Whatever.’ He brightened. ‘Can I have an ice cream now?’
I checked my watch. ‘Yeah, go on then. Tell Kevin I said it was OK.’
‘Thanks, Jack.’ He hopped down from his seat and closed his school exercise book. ‘And maybe I could play on the iPad for a little while?’ he asked hopefully. ‘Please?’
I flicked a tea towel towards him. ‘How could I resist that face. If it’s OK with your mother, it’s OK with me. It’s out in the office. But only for half an hour, OK? Any more than that and your brain will rot.’
He rolled his eyes. ‘That’s not true.’
‘Are you sure about that?’
‘You’re good with him,’ Hannah remarked from her perch at the bar after he wandered away.
‘He’s a great kid.’
Things had shifted between us since the other night.
A small shift, almost imperceptible and yet it may as well have been as wide as a chasm.
The easygoing familiarity between us had formalized.
When we spoke to each other now it was calculated, carefully thought out, checked for possible triggers and flashpoints, any unintended innuendo that could potentially be taken the wrong way.
It made me sad, and I was glad that Alex wasn’t around to see it.
I hated that he was dead. But if he hadn’t died I would never have moved to Pine Harbor, and I would never have met Taylor.
How could the worst event in my life bring me to the best thing that had ever happened to me?
Because that’s how I felt about her. She was everything I’d never known that I wanted in a woman.
For so long, I’d felt like the third wheel in Hannah and Alex’s marriage.
I wanted what they had. It was only natural, because what they’d had was pretty special.
I couldn’t blame Hannah for struggling without him.
‘Are you guys all set for the festival tomorrow?’ Hannah asked, watching me check the clean glasses out of the dishwasher for water marks and polishing them. ‘Is there anything you need me to do?’
‘Yes, we’re all set, and no, there’s nothing left for you to do other than show up.’
She sighed. ‘Do you really need me? I’ll just be in the way.’
‘You don’t have to be behind the stall. I’ve managed to make the rosters work so that both the stall and this place are covered for the whole three days.
As long as no one calls in sick we should be OK.
But you should be at the festival, even if it’s just to meet and greet people out the front.
It’ll give you a chance to get to know people around here and I think that’s important, if you plan on sticking around. ’
I was watching her, which meant I saw the face she pulled before she corrected it.
‘What was that face for?’
‘What face?’
‘Hannah.’
‘If I tell you, you have to promise not to get mad.’
‘Why would I get mad?’
‘I’m not telling you unless you promise.’
‘Just tell me.’
She took a deep breath and then the words came out in a rush. ‘I’ve decided to sell this place.’
I processed them, staring her. ‘Why?’
She threw up her hands, exasperated. ‘It’s just not me, Jack. We both know that. I’ve been kidding myself to think I could run this place. Or even live in this town.’
‘This isn’t because of what happened the other night, is it?’
‘No. Not everything revolves around you, believe it or not.’
‘Then why?’
She shrugged. ‘I’ve been thinking about it for a little while and now I’ve made my mind up.
This place was Alex’s dream, not mine. I’m completely out of my depth.
’ She pulled another face. ‘And, if I’m being completely honest, I’m going out of my mind in this godforsaken town.
Seriously. There’s nothing to do here. I miss the city.
I miss my family, my friends. So, I was thinking.
’ She took another deep breath. ‘That if I sold this place, I could reinvest the money into a business back in the city that’s more me. ’
‘Like what?’
‘A clothing boutique. Though not just clothing, also shoes, and accessories. The kind of things I like to wear.’
‘Sounds like you’ve given this a lot of thought.’
‘I have. And I really think this is the best option. For me and for you. Face it, you don’t belong here either. You’re only here because you’re ridiculously loyal, which is your best and worst personality trait.’
‘I’m not sure if that was a compliment or an insult.’
‘Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful to you and I always will be. You taking over the running of this place gave me the time I needed to get my head straight. Figure out what I want.’
‘Well I’m glad one of us knows.’
‘You can get your job back on the force,’ she suggested. ‘They didn’t want you to leave.’
I shook my head. ‘No. That part of my life is over.’
‘Are you sure? I know how much you loved it.’
‘It’s one of the few things I am sure about.’
‘Fair enough. I’m not going to push you. I’m relieved, actually. After what happened with Alex, I’d only worry about you.’
‘It’s not your job to worry about me.’
‘I’m always going to worry about you,’ she replied softly.
I put the glass I was holding down. ‘How come you never mentioned you were thinking about selling up?’
‘I made you uproot your whole life to move here. I didn’t want to disappoint you.’
I walked around the bar and sat on the stool next to hers.
‘You didn’t make me do anything, OK? I offered to take this on for you. That’s just what people do when a friend is struggling.’
She smiled. ‘Normally, when a friend is struggling you cook them a meal or offer them a shoulder to cry on. Moving all the way across the country to run this business for me was going above and beyond, and you know it.’
‘I was happy to do it, for you and for Alex.’
She looked down at her hands, clasped in her lap. ‘Do you think he’d be disappointed in me?’
‘No. God, no. Not at all.’
‘I feel like a failure. Buying this place was such a rash decision, and I was stupid to think that following his dream would somehow make me feel closer to him.’
‘You’re not stupid.’
‘Well.’ She shrugged. ‘Lesson learned, anyway. Don’t make life-changing decisions when you’re grieving.
It is not the time to make big changes to your life.
Maybe I should write a self-help book on what not to do when you lose someone you love.
Top of the list, don’t buy a lobster restaurant in a small town on an island off the coast of Maine. ’
‘That’s very specific advice. I’m not sure how big a market there would be for a book like that.’
She laughed. ‘Noted.’
‘Look, no one’s going to blame you for giving it a shot. You took a risk, tried something new and found out it wasn’t for you. That’s more than most people do in their lifetime. There’s no shame in it.’
‘Thanks, Jack. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier.’
‘It is what it is. I’ll figure something out.’
‘We’ll figure it out together.’ She smiled.
‘I’m actually looking forward to getting back to L.A.
, now that I’ve made my mind up. Back to normal life.
’ She laid a hand on my arm. ‘I know that being in the city is hard for you. It’s hard for me too.
Memories of Alex everywhere. But as long as we stick together we’ll get through it, OK? ’
‘I don’t know. L.A. might not be for me any more.’
‘Well you can’t stay here.’ She laughed as if the very idea was the most absurd thing she’d ever heard.
She had a point. Between her selling the restaurant and Taylor leaving in a few weeks to head back to New York, what was left to keep me here?