Chapter Six - Lu
Chapter Six
Lu
E ven at sixty-seven, Yana was still quite the beauty that she was at forty-seven. With a long dark mane, high cheekbones, and a fit body, she could pass for a much younger woman. She’d had a boob job four years ago, against Lu’s wishes. She’d threatened to have her butt lifted, too, but Lu warned that she’d gone too far and she wouldn’t stand for it.
“I’m the mother, dear heart,” Yana had reminded her.
“And I’m the daughter who’s saying that enough is enough, old woman!”
Yana sucked her teeth. She threw her hand in the air to blow off what Lu was saying. She was known for doing exactly what she wanted to do. As much as she had her own mind, she listened to Lu. Respected her. Loved her. Bragged to her friends about her brilliant daughter, who was a badass attorney-turned-innkeeper. She was proud of her only child.
After thinking things over all night, with barely a wink of sleep, Lu decided that she needed to see Yana in person. Their conversation the evening before had left her an emotional wreck. After she hung up the phone, she wasn’t certain when she’d ever talk to her mother again. But after dinner with her friends, who insisted that she give Yana some grace, she summoned her mother to the inn first thing Saturday morning. She needed more answers about her father, and Yana was going to give them to her, whether she wanted to or not.
She told Yana, “Get in that Toyota of yours and make your way here as soon as possible, Ina. I need to speak with you, and not by phone. In person.”
Though she wasn’t an early riser, Yana was on Cape May by seven o’clock. Just in time to smell the fresh morning ocean air and hear the birds chirping their morning medley. Early enough for coffee on the veranda, she plopped down in the wicker chair with a floppy beach hat perched upon her head and a big colorful, embroidered hobo bag that held God only knew what draped over her shoulder. It landed on the porch near her feet. Lu handed her mother a ceramic mug. The one she’d picked up in Cabo a few summers ago when she and Zach had traveled there for vacation.
“Did you use sugar or that crap in the pink packages?”
Lu raised an eyebrow at her mother. She almost laughed but had to remember that she was still mad at Yana. “I used that crap in the pink packages. You know you need to watch your sugar.”
“Good news. I don’t have diabetes anymore. I’ve even managed to ween myself off that horrible medication.”
“Dear Lord, Yana! You can’t ween yourself off medication without your doctor’s consent.”
“I had my doctor’s consent. Dr. Nubee said . . .”
“Dr. Nubee is not a medical doctor.”
“He’s just as capable as any of those doctors with degrees on their walls. Half of them don’t know what they’re doing anyway.”
Dr. Nubee was the holistic doctor who prescribed Yana medical marijuana for her ailments. According to her, he was the smartest man alive.
Zach poked his head out the door. “Morning, Yana.”
“Good morning, my handsome son-in-law-to-be.”
He walked out onto the veranda and kissed Yana’s cheek. “You look beautiful this morning, as always.”
“Thank you, my sweetheart. You sure know how to make a woman feel good.” She blushed. “Can you do me a little favor?”
“Anything.”
“Take this cup of coffee back into the kitchen, pour it down the drain, and bring me another cup with two real sugars in it? And just a splash of cream, darling.”
Zach took the mug from Yana and gave his fiancée a curious glance, as if to ask permission.
“Go ahead,” Lu told him. “If she doesn’t care about her health, why should I?”
“I care.”
“I can’t tell.” Lu shook her head.
Helping her mother navigate her health issues was an uphill battle, particularly since Yana didn’t believe she had any, or she believed that she’d been magically cured of them all. Either scenario was dangerous, in Lu’s opinion. The door slammed as Zach went inside.
“So, why am I on Cape May at the crack of dawn anyway? I thought we cleared up everything yesterday, mahal ko ?” Yana called Lu her love.
“We didn’t clear up everything and you know it. You lied, and I want to know why. And not just what you want me to hear. I want real answers.”
Yana breathed in deeply. Her eyes shifted from one side to the other. She always did that when she was thinking of the perfect response to get herself out of hot water. “I’m sorry I lied to you, but I had my reasons.”
“Yes, you told me that, but I don’t like your reasons. I had a right to know about him. To meet him. Do you know what it’s like to feel like a part of you is missing?”
“You weren’t missing anything. You had me. I gave you everything you needed.”
“I needed to feel whole. And you took that from me.”
Zach returned with Yana’s coffee and handed it to her.
“Thank you.” She smiled at him.
Yana loved Zach and had always told him so. She’d always openly told him that she loved how he loved Lu. How he spoiled her, catered to her. Told him that her daughter deserved someone who would show her such care. She’d always been an advocate for their love, and Lu appreciated that. Yana had never been able to find such a man. She always talked about how she was too impatient as a young woman, and now she was too set in her ways to ever settle down. Lu knew that her mother could be downright difficult at times.
Zach disappeared, giving Lu and Yana their space.
“I was protecting you.”
“From what?” Those same feelings from yesterday had returned. She gave her mother a sideways glance, breathed in deeply, and then exhaled. Then she massaged her temples for a bit.
“He abandoned us once. I didn’t want him abandoning you again. Truth is, I told you he was dead because I didn’t want you to go looking for him.”
“Yana, that was my choice. Not yours.” She attempted to keep her voice from raising, wanting to remain calm.
“You are my child. So, I made that choice for you.”
“Well, I’m not a child anymore. And now that he wants to see me, I’m anxious to go meet him—to go meet my siblings.”
Yana shook her head. Exhaled. “Is this something that you really want to do? I don’t want you going down that rabbit hole.”
“It’s too late. I’m booked on a flight next Wednesday. I’m going.” She said it casually.
“The past sometimes . . . well, sometimes it’s painful. And there’s a lot of things you don’t understand— wouldn’t understand.”
“Like what, Ina? Here’s your chance to lay it all out for me. Make me understand.”
One of Lu’s guests interrupted, stepping out onto the veranda. “Mornin’,” he said.
“Good morning, Paul. And how did you sleep?” Lu asked the older gentleman.
“Like a baby. I always sleep soundly when I’m here. It’s why I come here, to get away from it all.” He sipped coffee from a mug.
“That’s good to hear,” said Lu. “You’ve met my mother, Yana.”
“Indeed, I have. Good morning beautiful lady. So nice to see you again.”
“And a good morning to you,” said Yana, batting her lashes. “The pleasure is all mine.”
“Okay, we’re going for a walk. We’ll talk later, Paul.” Lu grabbed Yana’s hand and pulled her up from the chair. She whispered, “Walk with me.”
Yana stood, grabbed her bag, and bid Paul a farewell. “Have a wonderful day.”
“You as well.”
They stepped off the veranda and onto the sand, walked toward the ocean, stood side by side. and watched as the waves gently swept against the shore. The tide wasn’t high just yet. The waters were calm.
“You’re such a flirt,” Lu told her mother once they were alone. She couldn’t contain her giggle. She wanted to still be mad at Yana, make her suffer a bit, but it was hard. The two had been like peas in a pod Lu’s entire life. They took care of each other.
“What?”
“Tell me about you and John Samuels, that’s what. Did you love him?”
“Once upon a time. Yes.” Lu noticed that her mother’s eyes danced when she said it.
“Why didn’t you marry him?”
“Things were complicated, Lualhati. Life was complicated back then.” Yana brushed Lu’s windblown hair out of her face. “My beautiful girl. You look like him. You have his eyes and his smile, and that round face of his. And you’re strong like him.”
“He’s strong?” Lu asked. This was her first real something of him, besides that black-and-white photo. She needed for Yana to make him real for her. Yearned for anything she could offer.
“He was a cocky son of a bitch.” That’s what she offered.
Yana laughed. Lu did, too.
“Where did you meet him?”
“I worked as a laundry woman during the day and waitress at night. He was coming off a six-week deployment when he came into the bar where I worked. He was handsome. Oh, so handsome.” She closed her eyes, as if she was savoring the thought of him. “Very nice to me. He wasn’t like the other sailors, the ones stationed there permanently. He was a gentleman.”
“He asked you on a date?”
“More or less,” said Yana. “If dating him meant that he came into the bar where I worked to see me every single day, then yes, I suppose we were dating. It was weeks before we were intimate, though. He was patient. Cautious. Didn’t want to rush things. We would go for long walks and talk. We talked about everything.”
“And . . .”
“And then, one day, he kissed me. And I felt like the most beautiful woman in the world. He made me feel that way.”
“That’s sweet. And then?”
“And then we had a whirlwind love affair, like the ones you used to read about in those romance novels that you kept under your mattress when you were a teen.” Yana was in her own world at that moment. Lost in her thoughts. “Then I became pregnant with you, and at the same time, he was due to be deployed back to the US, to California, and my entire world turned upside down. You see, he was an officer who had been deployed to the Philippines only for a short time. His life was in the States, not Manila, honey. I knew that he would be leaving one day, but it didn’t make it any easier when the time came.”
“Did he ask you to go with him to the States?”
Yana nodded a yes. “But my home was in the Philippines. My family, everything I ever knew, was there. I knew nothing about the United States.”
“But he insisted?”
“My father, your grandfather, wasn’t having it any other way.”
“So, Lolo was involved? I’m just trying to get an understanding.”
“You must understand, we lived in great poverty. Even though I held down two jobs, it was just enough to get by. It was hard enough to make a living for myself, but now I had a baby on the way. Lolo insisted that John own up to his responsibilities, that he be honorable.”
“Oh, Lolo.” Lu placed her hands over her chest as she remembered her grandfather. She remembered picking up the frail little Filipino man from LaGuardia airport when he flew into New York for her college graduation. He was like a child, observing the sights as she drove him through Manhattan in her Volkswagen.
Yana looked at her, then handed Lu her coffee mug. “I would love to keep going down memory lane with you, my darling, but I have to go.”
“Casino?” Lu asked.
“No. Bridge club again. And let me tell you, these ladies don’t have a clue. I took their money yesterday, and now they want to try to win it back.”
Lu shook her head. “What am I going to do with you, Ina?”
“I don’t know, my darling. I know I can be a handful. I do know that.” Yana kissed her daughter’s cheek. “I hope that you abandon this whole idea of going to California. Nothing good will come of it. I have to go.”
“You’re opening old, painful wounds. Some things are better left alone. I don’t like that he contacted you. What gives him the right?”
“He’s my father. He has a right.”
“He hasn’t been there for any part of your life. He had his family, his children, his life,” said Yana. “If you go, you go without my blessing.”
“I really want your blessing, Ina, but if I don’t have it, you need to know that I’m going anyway.”
“You should honor your mother’s wishes,” Yana urged. “You’re choosing sides.”
“That’s a ridiculous statement, Ina. And you know it. I’m not choosing his side. Not to mention, he’s dying.”
Yana was quiet for a moment. She blinked, and then her eyes saddened. Shoulders slumped, she placed her hands against her chest. “I didn’t know, my darling. I’m sorry to hear that.”
“Yes, they’ve given him a short time to live. I’m not sure that I’ll have this opportunity again, to meet him. To speak with him. So, I’m going.” Lu and Yana circled around to the front of the inn, to where Yana was parked. With arms locked, they walked to her car. Lu pulled the driver’s door open. “I’ll call you later. Drive safe.”
“I love you more than life itself,” Yana said as she climbed into her car.
“I love you more than that.”
She loved her mother. Admired her. Having grown up in a single parent household, she watched Yana work multiple jobs just to make ends meet—for them. She remembered that sometimes their lights were shut off or they had to go to the neighbors to fill bottles with water just to bathe. Life had been tough for them, which was why Lu had worked so hard to position herself for a positive future. She attended Columbia University on a full scholarship, and later Vanderbilt to study law. But she was a Jersey girl at heart and had been eager to return home after graduation. She vowed to take care of Yana. Her mother had done so much for her, but she couldn’t honor her wishes this time. She needed to honor her own wishes, even if it meant driving a wedge between them. It was necessary.
She watched as Yana pulled the old model Toyota out of the parking lot. Lu had already gone to the dealership and shopped for a newer version of the same car for her mother—a candy-apple red one with a convertible top. She’d planned to surprise Yana for Christmas. She already knew that Yana wouldn’t want a new car. She was perfectly fine driving her old Toyota and wouldn’t want Lu making a fuss over her. But Lu needed to know that her mother was safe when driving back and forth between Atlantic City and Cape May, and God only knew where else she went on a regular basis. She rarely sat still for long. Lu had made many attempts to get her to abandon the city and move to Cape May.
“You’re getting older,” Lu had explained. “You need to simplify your lifestyle.”
“Who’s old?” She’d completely missed the point.
“I didn’t say you were old. I said you’re getting older.”
“Well, I’m not dead yet. And as long as I’m on this earth, I’ll live in the city.”
She watched as her mother pulled away from the inn, hoping their love would survive John Samuels.