Chapter 30 Mona
We linger on the balcony for a while longer.
Mostly in silence, though Ghost’s absence gnaws at me, so I give in and ask if anyone’s seen him since I spotted him watching me from the rocks while I was cliff-diving with the wild ones.
For one brief moment, I’d enjoyed that feeling of power—being the one who ignored him first. Then I looked up to acknowledge his falcon form only to find he’d left.
The victory was hollow and petty, leaving behind an ache in my chest. No wonder I drank way more beer than I should have.
Eventually, we make our way to my room, and though I’ve been watching the nest slowly transform as Grayson, Orion, and Silas add personal touches, we sleep in my much smaller bed. It doesn’t feel right, being in the nest, yet.
The four of us barely fit in my bed, but I wouldn’t trade this closeness for anything.
Tonight I don’t ask my omega to show me a vision before sleep.
So when the world reshapes in that familiar pattern, the edges darkening, like I’m stepping into another world, I’m caught off guard.
But then I look around and realize, in confusion, I’m still in my bedroom, staring at my sleeping form.
At Orion, beneath me, my cheek resting on his chest, Silas at my back, an arm slung over my hip.
Grayson at an awkward angle near the foot of the bed, his massive arm dangling over the side.
I’m smiling down at us when I hear her.
“Cute family.”
I spin in shock. Though I was in heat the last time we met, I recognize her instantly.
“How—what did you do?”
Deidre studies us, her gaze lingering a beat too long on each of our sleeping bodies.
“What the hell is this?” I hiss. Then the panic sets in. Deidre is here. Now. I rush over to my sleeping self. I try to slap my stupid cheeks, to wake myself up.
“Astral projection. You’re getting pretty good at it, actually. It helps that the half-breed witch is your mate. He’s sharing his power with you.”
My stomach drops. “How did you know he’s my mate?”
“He’s all over you,” she says cryptically, eyes sweeping over me.
I force my shoulders to relax, though my pulse hammers in my throat. “So, that’s what this is? Astral projection?”
Deidre’s lips curl into a half-smile. “In a way.” Her deep burgundy dress spills over her curves like fine wine. She’s elegant and beautiful in a way that feels cold. Like a sculpture. Or a Victorian doll. Unnatural.
“What do you want?”
“To talk. It’s been a long time coming, don’t you think?”
“I have only one thing to say to you. Stop. Just stop what you’re doing. Those wolves—”
Deidre flicks her fingers through the air, and suddenly my voice vanishes mid-sentence. My mouth keeps moving, but the sound dies, like she’s tied my larynx shut. I claw at my neck as the fear mounts in my chest.
“Fascinating.” She tilts her head, lips curving up.
“It’s much easier to spell you in the astral realm.
” A sigh escapes her lips. “Those deltas barely put up a fight, but the alphas are a real pain in the ass. I’ve lost three witches to their violence.
I wonder if you’ll be that easy to spell once I have my hands on you. ” Her eyes narrow, studying me.
My throat works uselessly while she waits, as if expecting a reply.
Her tone is too conversational, too easygoing.
“You were quite the puzzle. Your abilities... they’re unlike anything I’ve encountered.
Someone kept sneaking into my silo, disrupting the energy, riling up my wolves, giving them hope of a rescue. Didn’t take long to work out who.”
She flicks her wrist, and my throat opens again. I gasp a breath and rub at my throat, the words spilling out of me, frantic and raw. “Please. Please, whatever your plan is, whatever you’re doing—”
She cuts me off. “I’ve come to make a deal.”
I can’t have heard her right. We have nothing to offer her. She has all the power here, and she knows it.
She continues, “I only ever wanted your blood, Mona.” She reaches out and touches my wrist. Her fingers pass through my skin, leaving a shimmering cold in their wake. I shudder and snatch my arm back, cradling it against me. She can’t touch me here, at least.
“You have it already. You used blood magic on me,” I remind her.
“It’s almost gone. I used it to accelerate the delta transitions. It was potent. Old, but still the most powerful blood I ever worked with. Their transitions are nearly complete. Omegas, every one of them. Still waiting on their pregnancies, though…”
I point to the sleeping alphas in my bed. “Well, I can’t get pregnant unless it’s with them. And they’d die before helping you—as would I.” I don’t admit that they can’t get me pregnant anyway because I’m still on birth control, making her entire plan to use me moot.
She wants my blood, but if I’m pregnant, then it’s not just my blood in my system. It’s mine and my mates. An alpha and omega, with the spark of a third life inside me. That is her ultimate goal—to take blood charged with the Moon Goddess’s raw power and potential. “So your little plan—”
“Well, after working with your blood, I’ve realized how powerful it is.
The other omegas I’ve made require pregnancy to produce even a fraction of what your blood naturally has.
We do have one omega who’s recently conceived—I’ve already run tests and the potency increase is remarkable—but it’s still not enough.
You see, you’re different. There’s just something about your blood…
it gives me everything I need even without having to impregnate you with an alpha’s seed. Isn’t that great?”
“Well, you’re shit out of luck. There’s no way I’m just giving you my blood.”
For a moment, Deidre’s face softens into something that might pass for regret on anyone who still had a soul. She tilts her head, her lips pressing in pity. “You’d really allow all those deltas to suffer in your absence?”
I squint at her, then replay her words in my mind. “What do you mean? You’d let them go?”
Every instinct screams not to believe her. Somewhere beyond this astral realm, I swear I can feel Beep’s energy, frantic and warning, like she’s clutching at my sleeve, trying to pull me back from Deidre’s words.
But then I think of Andrea and Ingrid. Of Diya, and all the other women stuck there. The alphas stuck with them, of the things Deidre is already forcing them to do. Things they’ll never get over.
Silas’s scars are dug so much deeper than his skin, and all those shifters would end up the same. They’d be forced to live with memories of her cruelty—not just what she did to them, but what she made them do to each other.
“I’ll let them go,” she confirms.
A wolf can sense when someone is lying. I don’t know if it’s just her, or this strange in-between world we’re in, but I honestly can’t tell if she is. “Why?” I ask. “What do you want my blood for?”
Deidre’s eyes soften for a heartbeat—so brief, I almost think I’m imagining it. Her hand drifts to her belly, fingers splayed protectively, almost as if…
But no, that can’t be right. According to Grayson, witches avoid pregnancy at all costs—something about their magic becoming diluted if they have children.
But then the moment is gone, and she rolls her wrist limply, as if my follow-up questions are somehow more burdensome than everything else she’s done.
“There’s a spell I’m after, but the final ingredient is powerful blood so infused with the Moon Goddess’s magic she’ll have no choice but to grant me what I need.
I’m so close, Mona. Once I get what I need, I will let the wolves go. ”
“I don’t believe you.”
She laughs sharply. “Believe what you like. Assume I’m lying, I don’t care.
But as it stands, there is no way on earth your little witch-bird half-breed will find us.
We are spelled, hidden, and buried, and with all those new omegas—there may not be enough power in their blood for my spell, but it’s enough to stay hidden for decades—how many will you allow to suffer when you could end it by coming to me? ”
“I’m not the one allowing them to suffer!”
“If I get what I need for my spell—if you come to me, alone, and allow me to take your blood, I will let every one of them go.”
I shouldn’t trust her. I don’t. But also… What choice do I have? I look over at my sleeping mates. And I think about the pain in Andrea’s eyes. My throat constricts. Not from magic, but dread. Pain. Loss. Grief.
Deidre narrows her eyes. “Your mates cannot know—”
“There must be another way,” I whisper, more to myself than to her. I don’t want to give her my blood. I don’t want to leave here. It’s home. They are my home. There’s a strange tingling around my heart, a fire in my chest full of anxiety.
“There is not.” She watches me for a long while, eyes boring into me, unblinking.
Waiting. “They cannot know. If they do, they will never let you come.” Her lips curl into something between a smile and a sneer.
“I will be watching you, Mona. If I find out you told them? I’ll begin with the youngest wolf.
I’ll work my way through them, one by one, ensuring a spelled and rutting alpha tears them apart with their cocks, and I’ll do it without putting the girls through magick’d-heat.
Then I will bleed them dry, burn their still-breathing bodies, and then snatch more deltas off the streets so I can do it all over again. They’re easy to grab, after all.”
My whole body shakes. Even in this state, my hands get clammy. Nausea churns in my stomach. “How can you—” I suck in a breath, feeling dizzy. “How can you be like this? They are living beings. They have lives, families—”
“I do not give a single fuck about their families. They can rot in hell for all I care.” Her eyes flash with emotion.
I bite down so hard my jaw clicks. On a shaky breath, I say, “What’s the spell? If I do this, if I come to you, and you use my blood for this spell, and you let them all go, I want to know what the spell is. I need to know what it’s for. If you’re just going to hurt more people—”
“Believe it or not, the spell won’t actually affect the shifters or anyone else. It’s personal.”
“I have no reason to believe—”
“You’re just going to have to trust me.”
“Tell me what this is really about, Deidre.”
She's quiet at first. And then, “The longer you live,” she says, her voice softening, “the more you must carry your regrets. But certain choices… they leave marks that can’t be erased. The purpose of the spell isn’t your concern.
I promise you it has no connection to the shifters.
I won’t cause them any more suffering while I pursue this.
” There’s so much sincerity and conviction in her words, I almost believe her.
My mind races. There are so many things wrong with this.
I should say no. I do not trust her. And it’s probably a trap.
I need to tell her to fuck off. But I’ve seen all the faces of the missing wolves.
I’ve memorized their names, their clans, their features, the sounds of their cries, the looks on their faces as tears stream down their cheeks while they beg for help.
Lily and Silas. All their pain.
I can’t turn my back on them. “Let the other wolves go, and I’ll come.”
“I suppose I’ll just kill them all now, then.” She sighs and takes a step back, and I shriek.
“No! Okay! Okay! I’ll come. But you let those wolves go the moment I arrive, or I swear my pack will hunt you down and tear you apart.” I don’t know how they’ll find me, but she doesn’t need to know that.
Deidre shakes her head, but I cut her off. “I need some assurance. If you’re planning to kill them anyway, then there’s no reason for me to come.”
She snarls. Whatever she wants from me must be worth it, because finally, she gives a single nod. My stomach stays knotted.
“Deal. Now, not a word to your mates. Head south by tomorrow evening, and I’ll slip into your dreams tomorrow night with further instructions.”
She vanishes before I can respond, leaving me with a mix of relief and dread. The deal is done. I can’t take it back now.
Well, that’s not true.
I could just not go. I could stay here and tell my mates everything.
Anxiety crawls up my throat. Images of all the women flash through my mind.
No, that’s not even a choice, because I know what would happen—my mates protective instincts would go into overdrive.
Meanwhile, we’re no closer to finding them, and Deidre promised to extract every ounce of suffering and power the shifters posses before killing them slowly.
I believe her. After everything? After Silas and Lily, and what I’ve seen in the Silo?
I believe her.
My vision blurs at the edges, consciousness sliding back into my body, but I linger just long enough to stare at my three mates one last time. Tears welling up, I memorize them, heart tight with fear that this moment—the four of us, together—might be one of our last.
When I land back in my body, I bite down so hard, tasting blood on my tongue, barely swallowing the scream threatening to wake my sleeping mates.
My eyes drift from where my head rests on Orion’s chest, past Silas’s sleeping form, to the darkened window.
Dawn is hours away. I listen to the rhythm of their breathing, and I inhale their scents—chocolate and hazelnut, cinnamon and campfire, fresh, earthy rain and citrus—and I focus on muting our bond.
Beep says nothing. Her despondency is louder than mine. But she knows what we must do. Because I am an omega. And I cannot allow another shifter to suffer when we can do something about it.
Brick by brick, I spend the following hours practicing how to shield our bonds. How to lie to a group of alphas who know and love me, who trust me, who, by morning, cannot know what thrums deep inside my chest: pure, unmitigated fear. And, that I’m leaving them.