32. Across the Divide
Across the Divide
Pearl spent two days at her mother’s bedside, willing her to wake. And when she finally opened her eyes, Pearl swore she would kill her.
“Ma?”
Sheriff Oak blinked at her, an alarmingly soft and dreamy smile touching her lips. “Pea?”
“I’m here.” Pearl grabbed her hand, kneeling on the floor and leaning over the bed.
The grip on Pearl’s hand tightened, but Sheriff Oak’s eyes fluttered. “I need to say…”
“We’ll talk later.”
“Don’t run away.”
Pearl waited until the next morning when, despite the caution from the doctor against it, Sheriff Oak was sitting up in her bed. Her hair hung loosely around her, more white showing than usual. More lines of time on her face as she stared at Pearl.
“How many people did we lose?” the sheriff asked.
“Five. But Faltsprings lost twelve.”
The sheriff nodded. “They’ve been recovered?”
“And buried. Company folks came by yesterday too, to inform us they’ve decided on a much more northern route west. Avoiding the whole area and both of us.”
“Good.”
“I thought you’d be disappointed.”
Sheriff Oak shrugged, and grimaced. “Trains are noisy. I would’ve missed the quiet.”
It wasn’t that simple, and they both knew it. But Pearl couldn’t muster up any regret. She couldn’t muster up much of anything, too busy suppressing the horrible clawing emptiness in her chest. “Thanks for coming to rescue me.”
Sheriff Oak huffed weakly. “Didn’t work so well.”
“Yes it did. We are here, and I am safe.”
Her mother frowned, her eyes troubled. “You’re starting to speak funny. All formal and shit.”
“Am I?”
Sheriff Oak looked down at the quilt covering her lap, her chapped fingers finding a loose thread. “Did you know your grandparents owned most of Plainsburgh?”
Pearl blinked. “What?”
“On your father’s side. He was from a very old, very wealthy family.”
Pearl had known her father came from the city, but not that. “How have I never heard that?”
“Because they disowned him. When he chose me. To marry me and stay. Lot of good it did him, in the end.”
“His death wasn’t your fault.”
“Not entirely. But I could’ve done so much differently.” She looked back at Pearl. “I always swore I’d never try to stop you from your own life. That I’d never make you choose like he had to choose. And I’ve failed at that too.”
Pearl didn’t know what to say.
“Where is she? Your…Driz?”
Tears stung Pearl’s eyes, the control she had over her emotions slipping. “I don’t know. She left.”
“Because of me?”
Pearl shook her head. “Because she woke. Two of the five we lost were from her. When she was trying to get to me.” Pearl didn’t blame Driz for that. She didn’t expect the sheriff to be so forgiving. Yet she wouldn’t hide it from her either. She’d learn soon enough. “She thought she hurt me.”
“Did she?” Her mother’s eyes sharpened.
“No. I’m a little bruised from the whole thing, but I’m perfectly fine. I tried to tell her that, but she didn’t listen.” Pearl stood abruptly and paced to the window, agitated. “No one fucking listens.”
“I’m listening. I promise I’m listening, Pearl. Talk to me. Tell me.”
Instead of stopping, the tears flowed harder.
“She didn’t mean any of it. She didn’t want anyone to get hurt.
You should’ve seen her face when she realized what happened.
She doesn’t even hunt mammals.” Pearl struggled for air.
“She’s just so kind, and thoughtful. Not because she’s trying to prove or gain anything.
I feel safe with her. She hasn’t said it, but I feel her love.
And I’m terrified that she’s finally realized I’m not worth it.
I don’t think she’s coming back this time. ”
The words hung in the room between Pearl’s heaving gasps as the emotions and fears spilled out of her. Her mother’s own face was wet as she watched Pearl sag, her traitorous body revolting, sliding down the wall to the floor.
“Then go after her. Take a search party.”
That startled Pearl’s tears into submission. “What?”
“I’ve failed you enough. I’ve still got no idea how it’ll work, but if she’s what you truly want, and what’ll make you happy…” Sheriff Oak swallowed, grimacing, “…then I’ll learn to live with it.”
“No more shooting her?”
“No more shooting, no more threats. Unless she does hurt you, then all bets are off.”
Pearl scrambled forward and threw her arms around her mother, forgetting about the wound and squeezing too tight. “Thanks, Ma.”
“Go on, then. Go.”
Driz pressed her hands over her ears.
It was the third night of Pearl calling. No matter how far Driz flew, the sound traveled to her, her name on Pearl’s lips.
Sometimes the calls were mournful. Sometimes they sounded angry. Frustrated. They would pause for a brief time and start back up.
Driz tried to be strong. But Pearl wanted her. Needed her. She was hurting herself attempting to reach Driz. The strain altered her voice, her calls growing scratchier. Driz wouldn’t allow Pearl to hurt herself.
So Driz gave in to the desire to speak to her again.
Pearl jumped when Driz landed in the ravine, as if not expecting her to. And that broke Driz’s heart all the more.
“You came,” Pearl croaked, reaching.
Driz resisted for one more moment. But when Pearl stumbled, instinct took over and she stepped forward, steadying her. And she was lost. Lost for Pearl. She always would be.
Pearl threw herself against Driz’s front, burying her face in her neck and threading her fingers into Driz’s hair. Driz savored each breath. Each part of her that got to touch Pearl again.
“Driz…”
“Hush,” Driz soothed, running her unworthy hand up and down Pearl’s back.
“We need to talk.”
“We will. But not yet. Do not strain your throat more.”
Pearl pressed closer. Driz closed her wings and simply held her as Pearl’s racing heart slowly gentled against her own.
“Is your mother healing?” Driz asked. It had been weighing on her. She’d almost returned to check the previous nights.
“She should make a full recovery. Thanks to you.”
“I am glad.”
“Are you?” Pearl pulled back enough to look into Driz’s eyes.
“Of course I am.”
“Even after everything she’s done?”
Driz cupped Pearl’s cheek. “She is your mother. Losing her would make you sad.”
Tears clung to Pearl’s eyelashes. “Losing you would make me sad too. When you left, it hurt so much.”
Driz’s chest constricted. “I did not know how to stay.”
“It’s alright.” Pearl pressed their lips together. “You came back. And I can’t tell you how glad I am.”
Driz shivered at the touch of Pearl’s mouth. Pearl’s kiss deepened and became frantic, hands grasping.
“Wait,” Driz managed, and Pearl stilled. “How can you touch me after what I did?”
“After you saved me, and my mother?”
“I killed people. I bruised you.”
“You did. And I killed people too. Bruises heal. Let me show you.” She undid the buttons on her waistcoat and her blue pinstripe shirt. It was the same one Pearl had worn the very first time they met. But Driz forgot about the fabric as it left Pearl’s body.
The shadows of marks still mottled her skin, but they were more faint.
“You’ve got nothing to apologize for,” Pearl breathed. “Even if I bruised every time you touched me, I’d still reach for you.”
Driz felt the same way about Pearl’s touch. But… “Why?”
“Because you’re worth it. It was never about the bruises, like it was never about the words. It’s about what they mean. I got these because you were trying to save me, not hurt me. That makes all the difference. And because I love you.”
Driz must have misheard her.
“I love you, Driz.” Pearl grabbed Driz’s wrists and placed her hands over Pearl’s bare breasts. “Won’t you touch me? Not because I’m avoiding talking. We’ll definitely do that. But I can’t stand to go another night without feeling you against me. Please.”
The sensation of Pearl in her palms jumbled Driz’s brain. The sound that escaped her was unfamiliar. But she pulled away, still afraid of herself.
Pearl sighed. “Then may I touch you?”
Her hands slid up Driz’s shoulders. One wrapped around the nape of her neck, the other furrowing into her hair.
“Is this alright?” Pearl asked. “Tell me. I need you to say it, or I’ll stop.”
“Yes,” Driz managed.
Pearl smiled, her teeth glinting before she claimed Driz’s lips. Driz gave in, kissing her back.
Pearl’s mouth traveled to her cheekbone and up to her brow, and then she tugged Driz’s head lower so she could run her lips along Driz’s horn.
Driz shuddered, and when Pearl replaced her lips with her tongue, her wings snapped.
Pearl lavished the right horn, and then the left. Driz’s breathing increased with each pass of Pearl’s lips, each lap of her tongue, the need to touch Pearl excruciating.
Pearl pressed her mouth to Driz’s ear as her fingers ran down Driz’s stomach. “Let’s fly.”
“Where?”
“Anywhere. Nowhere. As long as you take me with you, I don’t care.”
As Driz closed her arms around Pearl’s back, more of her fear eased. They’d done this before. They could do it again. Driz was in control of herself as the night bloomed around them, and she opened her wings.
She would give Pearl whatever she required.
Pearl’s grip on her horn tightened and Driz thought she might crumble to dust from the pleasure of it. She flew higher, where the moon and the stars welcomed them.
Driz looked into Pearl’s eyes. Pearl was smiling. There was no fear in her.
“Do you still want me to bite you every night?” Pearl whispered. “Because I plan on it.”
“Yes.”
Pearl grinned. And she bit her.
Driz shuddered with bliss, her wings closing, sending them into a freefall. Pearl’s hand didn’t stop this time, her teeth still clamped over Driz’s skin.
Trust, and surrender. Driz convulsed as the pleasure raced through her limbs, from the tips of her horns to her toes.
She snapped open her wings at the last moment, guiding them to a hilltop, laying Pearl down carefully.
Driz panted, twitching and wrung out. Pearl’s chest was rising and falling with her own breath, eyes wide. Driz forgot about her doubts. How could she doubt that look?
She reached for Pearl’s hips, sliding off the annoying fabric covering her perfect body.
Pearl parted her legs, knees falling wide. Her scent made Driz’s mouth and eyes water. She needed to feast on her.
And how Driz feasted, and would have been content to never eat anything else.
Pearl lifted her hips up to meet her, one hand braced on the earth and the other gripping Driz’s horn.
Somehow Driz’s own pleasure returned already.
She ignored it, focused on Pearl, until Pearl was shaking and calling her name again in her scratchy voice, but there was no mournfulness in it. There was no sadness.
Driz could not leave her. She had tried, and she had failed. And Pearl loved her. Driz did not know why or how, but Pearl said it, and Driz believed her. She knew better now when Pearl lied.
Pearl tugged on her horns, and Driz reluctantly lifted her head. “Come here,” Pearl breathed, and Driz crawled up her body to rest over her, braced on her arms.
Pearl kissed her for long moments before pushing on her shoulder. Driz sat up and Pearl climbed into her lap, where she buried her face in Driz’s neck. Driz held her, running her hands up and down her back.
“I have never loved before,” Driz said, her gaze on the stars speckled in the sky, reminding her of Pearl’s freckles. They always would now. “But if love is not what I feel for you, I cannot fathom what it might be.”
Pearl chuckled, nuzzling Driz’s neck before tilting Driz’s face down to her, replacing the view of the stars with the much better one of Pearl’s face.
“I hope I can do it correctly,” Driz promised. “I will try my best.”
“You’re already excellent at loving me.”
They sat together, wrapped up in each other. When Pearl shivered, Driz closed her wings, not ready to let her go.
“Shall I take you home?” Driz asked. “Or nearer to your home? I do not want to get too close and frighten people.”
“I don’t really care if people are frightened. They’re gonna have to get used to you. Because I’m not giving you up.”
“What if I wake again?” Driz asked, afraid voicing the words might make them come true.
“What if you do?”
“I don’t think I can go far enough away. For some reason, I can always hear you.”
“Then don’t go far away. You were able to control yourself once you got to me. If I’m not in danger, everything will be fine. And if I am in danger, feel free to tear their throats out.”
Driz’s mind whirled. Could this truly work? Was this hope in her chest a false gift from her blight curse? Or was the old goyle right, and they were different from the original gargoyles, and the curse didn’t exist at all?
What did Driz believe? As he had said, there was no one to tell her for certain. So Driz would decide. And she couldn’t possibly be cursed when she held Pearl like this.
“What will your mother say?”
“Nothing. She finally understands. That what I feel for you isn’t a mistake, or a lie, or a passing fancy. Because it isn’t. I’ve never felt like this. We’re so different in so many ways, but I don’t care. Nothing in life is easy, and they won’t keep us apart. We are worth it.”
Driz’s heart beat too fast, overwhelmed by Pearl’s words.
Pearl brushed the tears away. “I called you my sweetheart, you know. But I never actually asked if you wanted to be. So do you, Driz? Will you be my sweetheart? My partner? My mate?”
“Yes.” Driz hauled Pearl against her. “Yes. Yes, yes—”
Pearl laughed, kissing her quiet. “Don’t run away again. Please. I can’t stand it.”
Driz pressed her forehead to Pearl’s. “I will not. I have tried to stay away, but I cannot. Not from you.”
“Good.” Pearl smiled. “And to answer your question, no. No, you may not take me home yet. I choose to be right here. Tonight, and every night. With you.”