Chapter 9
‘Higher, Mummy!’
Clem gave Indi another enormous push on the swing, then fished her phone from her back pocket at the sound of a new message.
But the notification wasn’t from Hazel, explaining why she was running late, it was an email from the Penwarra theatre group with details for the upcoming auditions.
Clem smiled as she read the upbeat message, picturing Louisa’s kind face as she typed it out at South Giddi Giddi.
‘You won’t believe the afternoon we’ve had,’ a voice called out from across the park. Clem turned to see Hazel pulling a stroller from her car boot.
‘That sounds like a worry,’ Clem said. ‘The good news is I’ve brought fresh cinnamon scrolls and chocolate cupcakes, that should help.’
When she got closer, Clem saw her friend was beaming from ear to ear.
‘Alma went down for a nap without any complaints, Cormac fell asleep after breastfeeding, and then I nodded off on the couch. Can you believe it? Sorry I’m late, but it’s the first time I’ve strung together two hours’ sleep in about three months. ’
‘Don’t even think about it.’ Clem looped an arm around Hazel’s shoulder and pulled her into a half hug. ‘That’s worth celebrating, Mama. Mia’s on her way, shall I grab us coffee?’
‘You’re amazing,’ Hazel said. ‘I’ll watch the kids.’
Brew Haven was all but empty when she walked through the door, and the waitress was taking a personal call in the back room. Clem lingered by the cash register, trying to catch the girl’s eye.
‘Hi, I’ll be with you in a sec,’ the girl said when she finally noticed Clem standing there. She was still waiting when the owner, Marco, came through the front door, grumbling to himself.
‘Yonni! There’s people waiting out here,’ he called, pausing mid-apology when he recognised Clem. ‘Oh, it’s you. We’re not snooping, are we?’
His use of the collective ‘we’ made her cringe.
‘Hi Marco, good to see you.’
‘I see you’ve got a little collab going on with the honey supplier now. You’ve done pretty well out of our sewerage troubles. Don’t think you can swoop in and steal all my business.’ His laugh sounded like an old chainsaw.
So Marco keeps on eye on my social media, does he?
As the waitress ambled out with a notepad in hand, Clem set down the menu and gave Marco a bright smile. ‘I think there’re enough customers in this district for everyone. I was supporting a fellow trader. Three flat whites please, but I’d like the milk on the warm side for one, not hot, please.’
The young barista got to work, barely meeting Clem’s eye as she took the payment and handed across the cup carrier.
‘Have a great day,’ Clem called. She checked the temperature, finding the cups equally scalding. If that was their usual standard of customer service, she was definitely one up on that marker.
The poster in the window of the second-hand shop caught Clem’s eye on the way back to the park, and she quickly ducked inside.
‘Hey Aunty Jean.’
Jean looked up from the box of bric-a-brac she was sorting, her eyes sharp as she assessed the coffee cups.
‘I hope Marco didn’t spit in it before he put the lid on?
I can’t believe you support those weevils, they had no qualms undercutting your lovely coffee and cake deal.
And after that stunt they pulled with Penwarra’s Valentines Day campaign, they’ve got most of the main street traders off-side.
’ Jean frowned. ‘You should park your coffee van in the town square when it’s up and running and steal all their business.
And how is my favourite great-niece, apart from her terrible taste in coffee merchants? ’
‘Going great, and thanks for the book suggestion. Harriet read it in a flash and there were heaps of passages perfect for her audition.’
‘Glad to hear it, love. And how about our Selina? She still getting a few shifts?’
Clem summoned a smile. ‘Improving every week,’ she said. It wouldn’t help to mention how many orders the teenager had messed up, and after the first few weeks Clem had stopped counting the broken plates and cups.
Mia and Hazel were both at the playground when Clem got back to the park. She watched Hazel straighten Cormac’s sunhat, while Mia rocked baby Fred in the pram, and the older trio raced around the playground.
Two perfect sleeping babies and two beautiful, content mums. It was exactly how Clem had pictured motherhood to be, before she’d had Harriet and her world had fallen down around her, and she felt a pang of envy that she hadn’t had it so easy.
Shame washed over her. They’re your dearest friends, you’ve got no reason to begrudge them this moment of calm.
But as she walked across the grass, Clem felt the whole gamut of emotions coursing through her.
Envy at how easy they made it look and the endless family support they had at their fingertips.
Shame that her irrational brain seesawed between fear that they’d get sick like her, and frustration that they showed no signs of struggling.
And it was only a matter of time before Mia asked why she’d dashed out of the hospital in tears.
If she dropped off the coffees and made a speedy exit, perhaps they’d forget all about her flaky behaviour.
She slowed to a snail’s pace on the pretext of admiring the roses budding up by the war memorial, buying time so she could brainstorm excuses.
I could have an important work delivery, or a call from Harriet’s school saying she’s sick. Or maybe it could be a meeting I forgot about, something to do with the school catering contracts.
She’d almost settled on the latter option when a call came from across the park and Kathy and Neil West came into view, shopping bags over their arms.
‘Granny, Grandpa!’ Alma scrambled off the seesaw and raced towards them. Left unbalanced, Indi crashed to the ground and burst into tears. Reggie jumped off the swing, reaching Indi’s side at the same time as Clem.
‘Hey snugglebug, you’ve got to wait until you’re both ready to stop seesawing,’ Neil scolded, leaning down and scooping up Alma. ‘Come see that your little friend’s okay.’
Even though he’d retired from crayfishing years earlier, Neil West was built tough, and he carried his granddaughter, along with the groceries, with ease.
‘Up you get, honey, you’re alright,’ Clem said, brushing bark from Indi’s hair. Within moments, Indi had dried her tears and was back on the seesaw, with Reggie this time.
Clem handed out the coffees. ‘Sorry Kathy, I would’ve brought some for you both if I’d known you were coming.’
‘I’d rather go thirsty than drink Marco’s muck,’ Kathy said. ‘And we’re not staying, just dropping off supplies and stealing another cuddle with this precious boy.’
Kathy extricated a sleeping Cormac from Hazel’s arms and gave her daughter an enormous head of cabbage and a chemist’s shopping bag containing a brand-new breast pump.
Clem smiled, but her eyes prickled at the tender exchange.
This was what grandparents were supposed to be like.
This was how mums were supposed to treat their daughters when they were in the trenches of motherhood.
She hadn’t received help from her mother, not then and not now.
When was the last time she’d heard from Renee?
Christmas? Easter? Events that coincided with a church-based reminder about the sanctity of family?
‘Mastitis is the worst,’ Hazel said, massaging a milk-heavy breast with the heel of her palm. ‘I can’t believe Cormac’s napping again. If he sleeps much longer, I’ll use that butter knife to hack off this breast.’
Mia grimaced. ‘I had it four times with Reggie. No sign of it with Fred yet, thank goodness, but I’m wary.’
‘Our conversations used to be hip and happening once, didn’t they?
’ Hazel groaned. ‘Now all I can talk about is infected milk ducts and the joy of two consecutive hours of sleep. I couldn’t possibly tell you what’s happening in politics.
Heaven forbid they hold an election soon because I’ve got no idea who are the goodies and who are the baddies. ’
‘I don’t have a newborn and I couldn’t honestly tell you either,’ Clem said.
‘But on the plus side, I can tell you the current wholesale rate for organic carrots, the optimum milk temp for the perfect coffee and the most successful advertising platform in the Limestone Coast. And I bet that before your mummy-brain fog, you could also recite the most popular Aussie novels at the Penwarra Library, speak for hours on the merits of the Dewey decimal system and list the going rate for an author’s speaking fee.
And I daresay Mia could rattle off the home economics syllabus, sew a dozen dresses in a weekend and tell us the current price per kilo of crayfish.
That’s pretty heady stuff too, you know. ’
And while she didn’t hurry off as soon as the coffee was distributed, Clem didn’t linger for long either.
She knew it was just a matter of time before one, or both, of the baby boys started crying and while she suspected it wouldn’t be as triggering as the maternity ward, she didn’t want to push her luck.
‘You’re going already? Isn’t it your day off?’
Keeping her attention on the picnic rug, Clem gathered up the Tupperware containers she’d brought the sweets in, and the last of Indi’s belongings.
‘I’d better head off, a million things to do,’ she said, hugging Hazel and Mia goodbye. ‘Get those cabbage leaves on ASAP, before you need antibiotics,’ she said, farewelling them with a wave.
Clem carted Indi from shop to shop, running errands and restocking groceries. They arrived home as Harriet’s school bus came down the road.
‘Look, honey,’ she told Indi, pointing to Harriet dawdling down the driveway. ‘Your big sister nearly beat us home.’