Chapter 21
21
She shouldn’t have thrown his comment back at him. If she hadn’t answered his indirect question about whether she was looking to meet the right person, why should she expect him to answer hers?
Even if it would be nice to know.
“So, uh, where is your roommate today?” Noah glanced around the cottage.
He was changing the subject.
It appeared her curiosity wasn’t going to be satisfied.
But you couldn’t force people to confide in you if they weren’t ready, as she’d told Noah early on about Emma.
Stifling her disappointment, Bren tightened the cap on the ink lid. “At work. Sweet Dreams hired her. She started yesterday.” She gave him a quick recap of the good news. “She’s planning to rent an apartment next week.”
“Did you ever find out what brought her out here?”
“Yes. She and her younger brother were in a bad situation. He’ll be joining her as soon as she’s established here and can petition for guardianship.” The rest of what Emma had relayed had been shared in confidence. But since Justin would be living with his sister for all the world to see, it should be fine to pass on that part of her story.
“I guess your instincts about her were sound.”
She forced up the corners of her mouth. “When you’ve walked a mile in someone’s shoes, it can be easier to spot a kindred spirit.”
“Yeah.” His Adam’s apple bobbed, and he shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “What time does she get off?”
“Noon.” Bren watched him, trying without success to identify the strange vibes wafting in her direction.
He straightened the pile of envelopes he’d gathered up, aligning all the corners to create a neat, precise stack. “You, uh, mentioned a couple of minutes ago that it shouldn’t be hard to meet the right person in a city the size of St. Louis, if someone was looking.”
Interesting that he was circling back to their previous subject and venturing into what promised to be more personal territory.
“I assumed there’d be a bigger pool of eligible people to draw from in a large city. Was I wrong?”
“I don’t know. I wasn’t looking. Like I said, my personal life has always taken a distant second place to my career. But I did meet someone without looking earlier this year.”
Bren’s lungs lurched.
The man standing across from her was involved in a romance back home?
But then ... why had he almost kissed her? That didn’t fit the image he radiated of integrity and honesty and conscientiousness.
Slowly she lowered herself into her chair at the table. “Are you saying you have a significant other?”
“No.” His response was immediate and definitive. “May I?” He indicated the chair across from her.
She waved him into it. “I’m a little confused.”
“So was I.” He sat. Sighed. “To cut to the chase, I had a bad dating experience that left me very gun-shy.”
Ah. That explained a lot.
Guys who’d been burned could be more inclined to walk a wide circle around romance even if a seemingly perfect match showed up. And she and Noah were far from perfect, at least on the surface. Different educational levels and backgrounds aside, there were also the geographic challenges.
No wonder he’d been skittish around her—other than the one lapse at the cottage door.
A surge of high-voltage current zipped through her as the memory of those charged moments replayed in her mind.
Curbing the urge to pick up one of the envelopes and fan her face, she rested her hands one atop the other on the table. “I’ve had a few of those too. Early on, after I left home, when I still hoped there were some guys out there who were genuine and knew how to appreciate a woman without trying to change who she was. It didn’t take me long to see through most of them, though.” She exhaled. “It can be easy to be fooled by appearances. Even for someone who knows better.”
“I hear you. But as Charley reminded me not long ago, it’s what’s below the surface that counts.” His gaze locked onto hers.
O-kay.
Was he talking about her? Was he saying a romance between an Oxford-shirt-wearing CPA and a barista with purple-hued hair wasn’t as far-fetched as it sounded?
Before she could ponder that question, he continued.
“But I fall into the fooled camp with Candace.” His forehead crinkled. “It all started when one of my colleagues asked me if I’d be his sister’s date for a wedding. I wasn’t all that thrilled about the idea, but I did it as a favor for him.”
“The date didn’t go well?”
“On the contrary. It went very well. She turned out to be buttoned-up and career-focused like I am, well-educated, articulate, attractive, a rising star in her engineering firm.”
In other words, everything the Hope Harbor barista sitting across from him wasn’t.
“She sounds like a perfect fit.” She tried not to let her dejection show in her voice.
“I thought the same. Until she began to get clingy about a month into our dating.”
“Clingy how?”
“Dropping hints about marriage. Inviting me to meet her parents. Showing up at my condo unannounced. Expecting me to call her five or six times a day. Sending me dozens of texts with suggestive emojis every day.”
“Whoa.” Bren gaped at him. “There may be a stronger term than clingy for that sort of behavior.”
“I know. Trust me, several came to mind.” He forked his fingers through his hair. “I found out later she was in the throes of a major case of rebounditis. If I’d known that, I would never have asked her out for a second date. Or any of the dates that followed.”
“How long did you see her?”
“Too long.” A muscle in his cheek spasmed. “In hindsight, it feels like an eternity, but it was only about two months. I finally called a halt, which didn’t go over well with her—or her brother.”
“But the fault wasn’t yours. It sounds like her take about your intentions was way out of proportion to your actual interest.”
“Bingo. And as far as I know, I never did anything to suggest to her during what I considered to be casual dating that I was ready or willing to get more serious with her. I thought we were in the exploratory stage.”
“That’s a reasonable assumption. No one should jump to conclusions about a relationship too fast.” Even one that generated immediate sparks, like the ones she’d felt for the man across from her. Or an attraction so powerful some might be inclined to call it love at first sight.
Yet letting emotions influence decisions would be imprudent and dangerous. Getting too involved too quickly was a recipe for disaster. Period.
“It may be a reasonable assumption for most people, but it wasn’t with Candace—and the situation got worse after the breakup.”
“How is that possible?”
“She became vindictive and decided to spew trash talk about me to her brother, who shared it with other people at work.”
“Oh, Noah. That had to be incredibly awkward. I’m sorry you ran into someone like her.”
“Me too.” He scrubbed a hand down his face. “I mean, I suppose I could have been a tad more diplomatic in my breakup speech, but I’d had it. I wanted her to know in no uncertain terms that it was over and I didn’t want to hear from her again.”
“Did she get the message?”
“Yes. She never contacted me again—but her brother got an earful.” Noah picked up one of the envelopes. Rubbed a finger over the thick, expensive paper stock. “I have to admit, the whole experience made me wonder if romance was more trouble than it was worth.”
“I can understand that.”
“But I’m having second thoughts about that now.” He looked at her across the piles of wedding-related material.
Her heart flip-flopped.
Was he suggesting she was the reason for that?
And if so, what did that mean? Because his life was in St. Louis and hers was here. Plus, they hardly knew each other. Maybe all the sparks between them were a flash in the pan. An opposites-attracting phenomenon that would fizzle as fast as it had ignited.
They needed to be sensible about this. And honest. And up front. Talk the situation through like two mature adults.
Bren filled her lungs. Linked her fingers on the table. Took the plunge. “May I ask you a question?”
“Shoot.”
“Did I play a role in your new perspective about romance?” Best to confirm that before proceeding.
There was no more than a nanosecond of hesitation. “Yes.”
Somewhere in the dark and lonely recesses of her heart, a cheer erupted.
But she tried hard to ignore it. No way was she going to plunge headlong into a doomed romance and make a dumb mistake.
“Noah, I think we have to be realistic and—”
“Wait.” He held up a hand, palm forward. “Let me see if I can guess where you’re going with this. We met less than two weeks ago. Our lives are based in different parts of the country. Getting carried away by a mutual attraction—assuming I haven’t misread that—would be crazy. We’re sensible adults who should base any decisions about romance on logic and data and careful analysis. How close did I come?”
“Close. But I wouldn’t have put it in quite such methodical terms. I was just going to say we shouldn’t let hormones make us do something stupid.”
He hitched up one side of his mouth. “I like your take better. It’s short, sweet, and to the point.”
“So what do we do about this?”
“Give ourselves time to sort it out.”
“I like that concept in theory, but time’s running out. Aren’t you leaving Tuesday?”
“I’m going to try and extend my stay by a week.”
Another cheer erupted in her heart.
Nevertheless ...
“Three weeks still isn’t sufficient to make decisions that will affect the rest of our lives.” She leaned forward. “You know I love Hope Harbor, and your career is in St. Louis. If we got serious, what are the odds your boss would convert your position into a permanent remote work arrangement?”
His rumpled brow previewed his answer. “Low. The only extended remote work the company ever allowed was during Covid, and management terminated it as fast as possible.”
That news wasn’t unexpected, but it put what appeared to be an insurmountable barrier on the path to a relationship.
“I don’t see how this will ever work, Noah.” Hard as she tried to mask it, a tinge of discouragement wove through her words. “Assuming everything else clicked, geography may be a deal-breaker.”
He massaged the bridge of his nose. “I know. And I don’t want to start something we can’t finish.”
“Me neither.”
“Let’s think about this for a few days, okay?”
As far as she could see, there wasn’t much to think about. They were at an impasse, pure and simple.
But giving themselves a few days couldn’t hurt.
“That works for me.”
“Besides, we may be putting the cart before the horse.”
“How so?”
After a moment, he stood and held out his hand. “Walk me to the door while I tell you?”
She gave his outstretched fingers a wary inspection. Holding hands wasn’t the best idea if they wanted to be cautious about their situation. Any contact could hike up the wattage and make it more difficult to think logically.
However, the invitation was too hard to resist.
Giving up the fight, she slipped her fingers into his warm, firm grip and tried to ignore the delicious tingle that raced up her spine as he squeezed and tugged her to her feet.
“So explain your cart-before-the-horse statement.” Her request came out a tad breathless as she walked across the room by his side.
“We’ve both agreed that there’s serious chemistry between us, but we’ve never put that to the test with an actual kiss. For all we know, it could fizzle.” He stopped by the door and faced her, his mesmerizing blue eyes mere inches away, a heady trace of his aftershave tickling her nose, the barest hint of stubble on his strong jaw begging for a finger graze.
Was he kidding?
How could a kiss do anything but ratchet up the already potent adrenaline that was shutting down her lungs?
“I, uh, think you may be flirting with danger. What happened to let’s not get carried away? And basing our decision on logic and data and careful analysis?”
“In my business, we never make decisions without complete information. You can’t analyze a situation until you have all the facts, and this is a critical one. Don’t you think we should do a bit of research?”
She squinted at him. “I’m having trouble linking the concepts of kissing and research. And this isn’t helping my muddled thinking.” She lifted their entwined hands.
“My brain isn’t all that lucid right now, either. That can happen when a beautiful woman is standing inches away.”
At his husky admission, warmth filled Bren’s heart. Spilled over, like molten joy.
Hard as she tried to come up with a response, her brain refused to cooperate. All she could do was stare at him, sending who knew what subliminal message ... or invitation.
In the silence that followed, Noah’s features softened. He lifted his free hand. Traced the curve of her cheek. Ran the pad of his thumb softly across her lips.
Her lungs stalled.
If she kissed this man, she was going to be a goner.
But how could she not kiss him when she wanted to taste his lips with every fiber of her being?
“You win.” The concession came out in a croak.
He eased closer, until nothing but a whisper separated them. Then he slid his free hand behind her neck. Slowly bent down and feathered kisses across her forehead. Trailed them down her cheek ... close, so tantalizingly close, to her mouth. Lifted their joined hands and settled hers flat on his chest, where the steady, rapid beat of his heart throbbed against her fingertips.
Her eyelids drifted closed, and as she swayed toward him, Noah pressed her close, his hand in the small of her back. Someone whimpered.
Good heavens.
Had that sound come from her ?
Before she could process that question, Noah’s lips were on hers, warm and gentle, exploring and tasting, compelling and coaxing.
But she needed no persuading to dive into the kiss.
And what a kiss it was. Intoxicating, delicious, satisfying, tempting—and filled with enough electricity to light the town of Hope Harbor for a month.
When he at last broke contact and eased slightly back, he was breathing as hard as she was.
“Wow.” It was all she could manage.
“Yeah.” His response came out in a hoarse rasp, and he cleared his throat. “Based on this research, I don’t think we have to worry about the chemistry fizzling.”
“No. Not an issue.” She struggled to get her respiration under control. “But as far as I can see, this experiment only complicates everything.”
“I won’t argue with that.”
“So what next?”
“Let’s not try to answer that question yet. We should give ourselves a chance to come up for air first.” He drew back several more inches and took both her hands in his. “If all goes well, I’ll buy myself another week here. We don’t have to decide on next steps tonight.”
No, but they would soon. And until then, how was she supposed to sleep now that he’d whetted her appetite for a romance that didn’t seem to have any likelihood of succeeding?
On top of that, this was all moving at a dizzying speed.
“A week isn’t very long. I would think you’d want to be super cautious after Candace.”
“You’re not Candace.” He touched the tip of her nose. “And circumstances sometimes force conversations sooner than is optimal. But talking and doing are two different things. We’re just at the exploring-the-possibilities stage. Who knows? There may be an answer we haven’t thought of.” His mouth curved up. “But I’ll tell you one thing, Bren Ryan. Wherever this connection between us leads or doesn’t lead, you are one amazing woman.”
Doesn’t lead?
That caveat wasn’t promising, despite his flattering comment and their earth-shattering kiss.
But he was a practical man, after all. Focused on spreadsheets and analytics and making sure everything added up. And even with her limited exposure to the kind of stuff a CPA did, she knew that the math with the two of them wasn’t adding up, much as both of them wished it would.
“Bren?” He quirked an eyebrow at her.
She summoned up a shaky smile. “Thank you for saying that. You’re not too bad yourself, Noah Ward.”
“Hold that thought. Let’s talk again Monday after I have a conversation with my boss. I promised my dad a trip to Shore Acres State Park tomorrow, which means I’ll be tied up most of the day.”
“I’m on board with that plan.”
He bent down and brushed his lips over hers again in a tender kiss that left sweetness and promise in its wake.
Then he slipped through the door and disappeared.
As he would soon do forever unless they somehow figured out how to conduct a long-distance courtship—and how to reconcile two very different lifestyles and two very different addresses.