Chapter 3
KIEREN
It feels like a freight train is rumbling through my head as I sip a strong cup of coffee in the briefing room the next morning.
We’ve just moved into new offices as the business expands, and Bronn’s striding around like a proud peacock. I’m not sure how much of that is to do with the way his security firm is growing or the fact that he just found out his young wife is expecting their first child.
Either way, he’s in an expansive mood and even giving out rare smiles, which is odd for my serious-minded boss.
Seth slides into the seat next to me and takes in my rumpled appearance and the large mug of black coffee I’m nursing.
“Morning,” he says cheerfully, obviously taking great pleasure in my hangover.
“Morning—” I start to speak, but it comes out as a cough.
I hit myself on the chest to clear my throat. Bronn looks at me sharply.
“You coming down with something, Kieren?”
Seth stifles a laugh, and I shake my head, which sends the trains in my skull rumbling to the other side of my brain. It takes all my energy not to wince, but I can’t show weakness in front of Bronn.
Thankfully, he’s too caught up in the opening of the new office and our first briefing. He gives me a curt nod, and his gaze passes over me.
Relief floods me. Bronn is the typical hard-ass ex-soldier. He’d never understand what compels me to down liquor until I can’t think straight, to escape into the sweet oblivion that alcohol brings.
I need to stop drinking. I know I need to. But try telling that to myself when I’m sitting in a bar and scouring every face, hoping that one of them is Jodie.
The thought I might have lost her forever grips me like a fear. My coffee tastes bitter in my mouth, and I suddenly want something stronger.
Jodie is what I thought about on my last and final deployment. She’s what kept me sane. The memory of her soft voice, her smiling eyes, her body next to mine—it was the shining light that guided me through the darkness of war.
I always assumed I’d be able to find her when I got back. And if I don’t, if there’s no light, then there’s only darkness.
Leo comes into the room, humming as he always does. The cheerful bastard. He clocks my hangover immediately and his eyes light up.
“Good night out, Kieren?” he teases. “Meet any women, or still flying solo?”
I flip him the bird, and he chuckles good naturedly. It’s hard to be cross at Leo. When we were on tour, he kept us all going with his good humor and bad jokes.
Leo takes a seat at the back next to Tony, who’s as sullen looking as Leo is cheerful. Tony grunts a greeting at Leo, keeping his giant arms folded, the bulges of his muscles making his tattoos fall at funny angles.
“Mmm, I suddenly have a strong urge to eat boiled eggs,” Leo says jokingly, referring to Tony’s completely bald head.
Tony started losing hair a few years ago and recently took the step to shave his head and be done with it. Leo never loses an opportunity to rib him about it.
If it was anyone else, Tony would have them in a headlock by now. But he and Leo grew up together. They’re best friends and brothers in arms.
Tony just shakes his head heavily. “You gonna make that same joke every day, or you got any new material?”
“It’s not a joke my friend. It’s fact. I’ve got a boiled egg packed for lunch.”
“Is that because you were thinking about me when you woke up?” Tony quips back. “That’s sweet, man.”
We all chuckle, enjoying the banter.
Bronn moves to the front of the room, and the chatter stops.
“Thank you all for coming in today,” he starts.
There’s some housekeeping about the new building, how parking works, fire safety, and all that. I try to concentrate but my mind wonders, as it always does, to Jodie.
I wonder what she’s doing and where she is right now. If she’s still on the coast or if she moved off somewhere. I’m regretting all the questions I never asked her on that one perfect weekend.
“Now that we’ve got a fancy new office,” Bronn continues, “we’ve got a receptionist to field calls and greet clients.”
The door opens, and a petite and curvy blonde comes through looking nervous.
“You’ve all met Amy before, the newest member of our team.”
Leo sits up in his seat and nudges Tony. “You didn’t tell me Amy was coming to work here?”
Tony looks hard at his daughter. “I can keep an eye on her here. Make sure no boys come sniffing around.”
He cracks his knuckles, and I’d hate to be the man who tries to date his daughter.
“Hi, everyone.” Amy gives a nervous smile.
I’ve known Amy since she was a baby. We all have. But you only see kids grow up in snapshots when you’re in the military.
Especially if you’re in the Special Forces. With long deployments and black comms, you can’t always keep in touch with your family. Every time we came back, Amy would have grown up months at a time.
It’s hard keeping a family together in those conditions, and it’s not surprising Tony split with Amy’s mom. It’s not how he wanted things to go, but he loved her enough to set her free.
Now his little girl is all grown up, nineteen years old and our new receptionist.
“I’m sure you’ll all make Amy feel welcome,” Bronn says.
“Not too welcome,” mutters Tony, and we all laugh.
Bronn gets to talking about the jobs this week and where we’re all assigned.
I’ve got a cushy number ferrying around a visiting minor politician who’s had death threats. Often, it’s the presence of security that is the deterrent, but I won’t be afraid to act to protect a client when I need to.
I’m zoning out again when the door to the briefing room opens.
Someone’s pushing backwards into the room, and the first thing I see is an expansive ass in tight leggings.
The woman’s pulling a bucket and mop and using her fine ass to open the door.
She’s crouched over, her auburn hair tied in a high ponytail that sways over her shoulder, so I don’t immediately see her face.
But my heart rate quickens at the shape of her. The curvy figure, long neck, thick hair. Then she turns, and my heart skips a beat.
It’s her. Jodie.
My Jodie.
Right here in the briefing room.
The room spins, and I think I’m going to fall. My attention zones in on her, my eyes hardly believing it’s Jodie.
Her soft pink mouth is exactly as I remember it, with high, rosy cheekbones and hazel eyes that widen as she sees everyone staring at her.
My world spins. Time stands still.
It’s her.
In the briefing room.
My feet have been resting on the chair in front of me, and they fall to the floor as I sit up in my seat. The noise makes her look up, and our eyes lock.
Her mouth pops open, her eyes widening in shock. The room fades away, and it’s just the two of us for one long moment, staring at each other across the room.
Worry lines crease her brow that weren’t there eighteen months ago. There’re dark smudges under her eyes, and they no longer sparkle. Instead, her eyes look at me cool and glazed.
This is Jodie, but not the carefree girl I remember.
“And this is our new cleaner.”
Bronn lifts a hand to indicate Jodie, and she breaks her gaze from mine. Swallowing hard, she takes a breath and looks around nervously.
“Sorry, I didn’t know everyone was in here.”
The briefing room is designed so you can’t see into it, with tinted glass windows and a thick door. We deal with some confidential movements and need a secure area. She couldn’t have known we were in here until she opened the door.
Bronn gives her a rare smile.
“Don’t apologize.” He turns to us. “Jodie will be here for a few hours every day to keep things clean for us. But don’t make her job hard. Use the dishwasher and keep your desk tidy.”
“I’ll go start in the kitchen,” she mutters.
Without looking at me, she wheels her cleaning cart out of the room, and the door swings shut behind her.
For the first time in eighteen months, deep in my belly, I feel a small flicker of hope.