Chapter 36
36
Esther
E sther hit send, her computer made a swishing sound, and that was that. Her final project was turned in. Provided everything was there and looked good, she would receive her Master’s in Library and Information Science come graduation.
Sitting back in that creaky chair, she let the moment sink in. Physically, she was relieved. If she could melt into a puddle, that was exactly what she’d do.
Through the window, the sky lit blood-red as the sun sank below the horizon. She relaxed her shoulders, tensed from days of tunnel-visioning through the rest of the Platt collection. She was mid-stretch, her guard completely down when everything from the past week swept back in.
The witches, the potion, Ashley.
She hadn’t seen or heard from her in a week.
At first, she just sat there, letting the emotions wash over her, building one on top of the other. With a few clicks of her laptop, she switched her music from lo-fi to the other song in her history. It only took a few bars of the banjo before feet pounded on the stairs.
Uther burst through the attic door. “We’re back to the Taylor phase? Honey, this is the same as the original version.”
“But it’s not.” The screen blurred, but she held her tears from tipping over. “She’s older now, and I’m older, and we’ve been through so much, but the feelings are still there.”
“I thought you didn’t like country.”
“She’s pop now. See? We’ve both changed so much. Taylor is just out there making music and reclaiming her songs.”
“Esther, you’re being unnecessarily philosophical again.” He closed the door and took her hand. “Do we need to go make cookies?”
Her lower lip wobbled as she sang along to the part about crying on a staircase, begging her love to please not go.
“Oh my god. Are you changing the pronouns to fit you personally? We need something faster than cookies. This is an ice cream and wine kind of situation.”
The door slammed into the wall, making both Esther and Uther jump.
“It’s done!” August stood before them, a dramatic fist raised above his head.
“August, this isn’t the best time.” Uther gestured at Esther with his head as though she was blind and wouldn’t notice.
“Are we back to Taylor again?” He crinkled his nose at the screen. “I’m going to be honest. I didn’t really see you as a Taylor fan.”
“Where do you think I got the name for this chair?” Esther angrily gestured at the arm of Trouble, who squeaked with the movement.
“Never mind. It’s ready.” He lifted his hand, letting a chain dangle from his fist with a familiar silver bulb hanging at the end. “I put a dose in here for you. Figured two birds, one stone.”
He dropped the necklace into Esther’s hand and stood back with his hands on his hips and an expectant look on his face.
Esther waited for further explanation. “What is this?”
“The cure, obviously,” mumbled Uther.
“An excuse to go get your girl back,” said August.
Esther threw the necklace on the desk like it had burned her. She didn’t want anything to do with that day. Digging through her bag, she pulled out her earbuds and phone to queue up more Taylor. Without her classwork to carry her mind away, she was exposed, drowning in the floodgates of feelings. She hated feelings.
August looked between Esther and the necklace on the desk. “What are you scared of, Esther?”
She glared at him. They really hadn’t figured it out. “I give terrible advice and ruin lives with my bad decisions.”
Both boys looked skeptical.
“When have you ever given bad advice?” August’s question was more challenge than anything else, but Esther was ready.
“Aside from the obvious and most pressing one?” She gestured at the silver necklace.
“Sure, we’ll round back to that.” August leaned against a bookshelf, crossing his arms in front of him.
“Well, you both remember the beach house, right?” she asked.
August nodded. “I remember having a lot of fun with my friends for a week and saving money on housing to do it.”
“Uther?” Esther snapped her attention to her best friend.
He returned her look with a sad smile. “Yeah, I hated it at first, but I ended up having a lot of fun that week. Ashley did a lot to fix up the place.”
“Okay, well.” Esther racked her brain. “What about my idea to throw a Friendsgiving and you and Ashley decided to start a food fight and nearly tore each other’s heads off?”
August avoided eye contact until Uther elbowed him in the ribs. “Ow! Fine. I might have given Ashley my number that night. It was sort of the start of us actually trying to get along and might not have happened if you hadn’t given us one more push. Now, how about some good decisions you’ve made.”
“Ooh!” Uther hopped onto the desk and swung his legs back and forth. “What about that day you decided to go to a board game café to make friends? Anything good come out of putting yourself out there that day?” He poked her shoulder, and she swatted his hand away with a smile.
“Okay, yes.” She nudged Uther’s knee with her shoulder. “But you were also kidnapped because you’re friends with me.”
“Okay, one, I wasn’t. How many times do I need to remind you? You just thought I was. And two”—he spread his arms wide—“I’m fine. I’d even go so far as to say your presence in my life has made it better.”
“See?” said August. “It just needed time to resolve itself. Now, what about that time you agreed to go home with Ashley over Christmas and the two of you finally stopped awkwardly flirting and just made out already? That was good, right?”
At first, Esther’s mind blessed her with a vision of Ashley in her white cable-knit sweater and long, toned legs smiling at Esther, her blue eyes sparkling in the Christmas lights.
This vision shifted, dragging Esther back to the unforgettable look of betrayal on Ashley’s face when she found Esther and August with the witches—and the way that look morphed into the purest of anger. Ashley had trusted her with a literal piece of her, and she’d given it away right in front of her to the people Ashley hated the most.
“She hates me,” Esther said.
“Maybe.” August’s voice was quiet. “You’re not alone there. But I don’t think we’re done yet.” Grabbing the new stool he’d bought, he took a seat closer to the desk. “There’s something that all these situations have in common. They all get dark before working out for the best in the end. I think we just need to see this through.”
Esther placed a hand on his knee. “Not everything works out in the end.”
“Not for everyone,” August said. “But it does for you.”
“August, that’s?—”
“Esther.” Uther took both her hands. “You still have time to fix this. When you look back at this day, are you going to be satisfied? You have a whole lot to gain and not much to lose.”
August picked up the necklace, and Uther let go of her so August could place it in her hand.
“Remember what you were saying about Taylor?” Uther continued. “You’re both different now. You don’t need to hide anymore. Sometimes, you have to do something scary to make a very mildly different song. I think I lost the metaphor at the end there. But you get what I’m saying.”
Esther nodded. “But what would I say?” The words congested in her mind, tangling until it was impossible to find a start.
“What would Ashley do?” Uther turned to August.
August passed Esther a pen. “Write it down. When you’ve worked it out, go over there.”
“We’ll give you some space.” Uther took August’s hand, leading him out of the room.
Esther set the silver necklace on the desk. Fear knocked at her heart. This letter was an apology. She should have told Ashley the truth about the cure from the start. Now Esther had broken Ashley’s trust. There was no getting around it, and Esther would do whatever it took and wait however long Ashley needed to earn that back.
Ashley had given Esther a piece of herself when she had already given away too much. This was Esther’s chance to give her something back. To give her a second chance at life.
It was scary writing the words, but for the first time in a long time, she was excited to give someone a choice. To not fade into the background and let everything they’d built crumble into nothing.
Esther tore the page out before her nerves bogged her down, grabbed the necklace, and hurried from the room.
“I’m off. Wish me luck,” she shouted to Uther and August as she ran out the door.
“Have fun storming the castle,” shouted Uther from the porch as she jogged down the sidewalk and around the corner.
The streetlights flickered on one by one.
Esther wasn’t sure why she was running except that the moment seemed to require it. She was going to tell Ashley she was so sorry for breaking her trust, and Esther always wanted the best for her, whether that included Esther in her life or not. She was still practicing her lines as she climbed the steps to the vampire house. She’d start with a classic like, “Hi, Ashley,” then wing her way through her highlighted points from there. She knocked on the door and waited.
Hi, Ashley. Hi, Ashley. Hi, Ashley .
Someone that wasn’t Ashley answered the door in distressed denim shorts and a knit crop top.
“Hi, is Ashley in?” Of course she was in. Where else would she be? The sun had just set.
“Have I seen you before?”
Esther was pretty sure she’d never seen this woman. “I was hoping to speak with her.”
“You’re Esther, aren’t you?” The woman leaned against the doorway, getting annoyingly comfortable in this unhelpful limbo they were in.
“Yes?” It wasn’t meant to be a question. Esther was caught off guard by the vampire knowing her name.
“Awesome.” She offered her hand. “I’m Cynthia.”
Esther shook Cynthia’s hand. “It’s nice to meet you. Do you know if Ashley is in?”
“Why would I know where Ashley is?” Cynthia spoke loud and dramatically, her gaze darting behind her into the house. “She’s probably out.”
This wasn’t the outcome Esther had hoped for. While her note was solid, she’d still hoped to speak to Ashley in person.
“One second.” Esther pulled the letter out of her pocket, folded it into an envelope, and slipped the necklace inside. “Here.” She handed the package to Cynthia. “Could you see that she gets this?”
“Sure thing, dude.” With a brief finger gun, Cynthia sank back into the house and closed the door.
And that was that. Esther walked back to August’s house with a feeling of incompleteness. So, she hadn’t gotten to say her speech. Ashley would still get the note. She couldn’t bring herself to text Ashley. Not after her awkward exchange at the door. Maybe she’d text Ashley tomorrow. Just to make sure Cynthia had a chance to get the letter to Ashley. There wasn’t any reason to rush.