Chapter 18
I stared down at the piece of paper, the angry scrawl glaring up at me. But the guys jumped into action around me.
“Get her in the SUV,” Colt barked. “We need to search the woods. He could still be close.”
My stomach plummeted at that, but I didn’t have a chance to argue because Ronan had already hauled me into his arms.
Declan opened the back passenger door and Ronan shoved me inside, climbing in after me. The door slammed behind us, and the locks beeped.
Colt, Trace, Declan, and Dash took off running into the woods.
I tried to climb over Ronan to get to the door, but he blocked my path.
“Don’t, Firecracker. They need to focus right now, and knowing you’re safe will help with that.”
My eyes burned as tears welled, a mixture of fear, frustration, and worry. “It could be a trap like before.”
Ronan shook his head and pulled me onto his lap. “The shadow demons rarely come out in the light. They get their power from darkness.”
It made me feel a little better but not enough. “Damien could hurt them.”
“It’s four against one,” Ronan argued.
“He’s crafty.”
Ronan nuzzled my neck. “When we work as one, no one stands a chance against us.”
I burrowed into his hold, letting his strength and comfort swirl around me. But I kept my gaze focused on the forest. “I’m so tired of this. It’s like the hits never stop coming.”
Ronan rubbed a hand up and down my back. “I know, but it won’t be forever.”
I wanted to believe him, to trust that one day we would simply be able to be happy. But there was too much stacked against us for me to get there.
Instead of voicing my concerns, I stayed silent. I let The Assembly meeting and worries about Damien circle round and round in my brain. Each passing concern amplified them.
Thirty days.
Thirty sunrises and sunsets to wrangle my magic. I had no idea what the breaking of a bond entailed, but from the reaction of the people at the meeting today, it wasn’t good. And from the way my magic surged at Chloe earlier today, I was far from gaining control.
My eyes strained to see between the trees, searching for any hint of the guys. Nothing.
All I wanted was to be surrounded by them. To feel their heat coursing through me. To know they were safe.
But the truth was, it wasn’t Damien or even The Assembly that was their biggest danger. It was me. If I pulled them into instability instead of grounding them, I’d never forgive myself. And I knew by now that they’d follow me right over the cliff.
Movement flickered between the trees, and I sat up.
Colt trudged toward us, a scowl twisting his lips. Trace, Dash, and Declan followed behind, each wearing an expression that was a mixture of frustration and pissed the hell off.
The locks beeped again, and they all climbed in.
I scanned each of them for injury. “You’re okay? You weren’t hurt?”
Colt’s jaw worked back and forth as he started the engine. “His scent disappeared on a dirt road a quarter mile from here.”
I looked at the guys in question.
“It means he likely had a vehicle waiting,” Dash explained.
Trace let out a low growl that sounded as if it came from his demon itself. “It means that his fucking father is in contact. That’s the only way he could’ve known about the meeting.”
“That isn’t exactly a shock,” Declan said, fastening his seat belt as Colt pulled out of his makeshift parking spot.
“But it’s fucking bold,” Ronan said. “It’s risky as hell to show up here with no one at your back. He knows The Assembly wants to jail him.”
I shuddered at the memories trying to flare to life in my mind. The torture Damien had put me through.
Ronan held me tighter. “We’re going to get him.”
“And I’m going to enjoy removing each and every one of his organs,” Trace said, a gleeful glint in his violet eyes.
Dash smacked him. “Not helping right now.”
Trace’s gaze flicked to mine through the rearview mirror, all joy leaving him. “You’re safe, Little Bird. We won’t let anything happen to you.”
“But what about all of you? Who’s keeping you safe?” I asked.
I wanted to be that person. For the first time, I wasn’t scared of my new powers. I wanted to channel all of them. To protect the five men who had come to mean everything to me. But I worried I wouldn’t have what it takes.
Trace turned in his seat as Colt guided the SUV onto the two-lane highway. “We’ve been watching each other’s backs for years. We know how to play it smart.”
I was sure they did, but they’d been overpowered before. And if The Assembly decided I didn’t have enough control, there was nothing we could do.
Ronan squeezed me tighter against him. “We’ll train together. Our bodies and our abilities. Get ready for whatever comes our way.”
I stayed quiet at that because I knew the whatever he spoke of was if we had to stand against The Assembly itself. And I wasn’t sure we were strong enough for that.
The silence wrapped around me, heavy and oppressive, as we made our way home. The gates to The Nest opened the moment the guards saw our approach. I should’ve felt better being back in the safety of home, but I didn’t.
Colt pulled to a stop in front of the house, and Ronan lifted me out of the SUV. The second my feet hit the cobblestones, I was moving.
“LeeLee?” Colt called.
“I just need a minute,” I said, not looking back.
I didn’t head for the house, instead, rounding it and heading for the backyard. I didn’t move toward the sea but rather in the direction of the gardens to the side of the house. I’d never explored them, but right now, they housed the protection I so desperately needed.
There was an array of trees and plants. Rows of rose bushes and other things I couldn’t identify. I wound through them all until I came to a stop in front of a beautiful gazebo.
My breaths came in quick pants as I battled back tears.
“LeeLee,” Colt said in a hoarse whisper.
I should’ve known he wouldn’t leave me be, not when he knew I was hurting.
I couldn’t make myself turn around. Couldn’t face him. But I let my deepest fear slip free.
“What if I can’t do it? What if I can’t be what you need? What if I’m the thing that ruins all of you?”