12. Twelve
TWELVE
We headed for the CBD and were hit with two disappointing updates at the same time.
The first was that Archie wasn’t in the office. The secretary who informed us of that seemed genuinely apologetic, though I didn’t believe her. She was saying what she needed to in order to get rid of us.
The second came on the heels of my asking to see the new statue. The secretary was surprised when I mentioned it.
“The statue wasn’t supposed to be delivered here,” she explained. “It was a private purchase by Mr. Hayes. It was moved to his personal residence.”
I absorbed the information, then nodded. “Can you tell me where their house is?” It was a long shot, and the secretary reacted exactly as I’d expected her to.
She turned icy. “No, I cannot.”
Jack sent me a warning look when I squared my shoulders. That had me instantly deflating.
It had been agreed that we would approach Archie Hayes separately from the police.
Barry couldn’t use the symbol as a reason to question the man.
He was too prominent, too important, and donated too much money to the police department annually.
In fact, we promised not to bring up the police department at all. He wished us luck and waved us off.
I took that as a sign that we were on our own tracking down an address. Thankfully, Jack had a special search engine on his phone. I’d asked him about it before, but he’d been cagey. He said his military background granted him access to systems.
I was suspicious — and jealous, if we’re being honest — but I didn’t push him further. Jack was an honorable man. He wouldn’t give me something if he’d made a promise to someone else. I had to admire him for that.
“I have an address,” Jack said once we were in his truck. “Prytania and Second Street are the cross streets, according to the map.”
I frowned. Second Street? Was it possible he lived only a few blocks from his mother?
With hindsight guiding me, it made a lot of sense.
Someone with Archie Hayes’s ego could live nowhere but the Garden District.
He would live in one of those homes big enough to house four families, surrounded by the sort of fence that told the riffraff they belonged on the other side.
“I know the neighborhood,” I said. “I’m not surprised. His mother lives down Second Street a few blocks.”
“Do you really think that statue is at the house?” Charlie asked. “Maybe the secretary was lying. If I were in her position, I would totally think it was a weird question.”
I’d wondered that too. “I don’t disagree, but if we start wandering around that building without permission we might end up being arrested.
We need to check the house before we go back to the CBD.
” I paused. “Worst case scenario, I can break into the building without anyone the wiser if it comes to it.”
Charlie’s brow wrinkled. “How sure are you about that?”
“Positive.”
She opened her mouth, then shut it. “Let’s go to the Hayes house. I bet it’s big.”
“I’m sure it’s huge,” I agreed. “We’re talking about the type of house that had slave quarters, and not like the Creole cottages that have remodeled guest houses.”
Charlie angled herself in the front seat to look back at me. “You’re talking about those cottages that have the detached guest quarters? I’ve been told those guest quarters were all slave quarters at one time. Is that true?”
She was so innocent, I didn’t want to pop her bubble.
“Does your new house have a separate guest quarters?” I asked, already knowing the answer.
Alice had been the one to tell me about the house, somehow already knowing it would be perfect for Jack and Charlie.
I was familiar with their new neighborhood.
There was no way that house didn’t have separate guest quarters.
“It looks like a little two-story apartment now,” Charlie admitted.
I took pity on her. “You can’t control what other people did,” I said. “You didn’t build that space for slaves. You can turn it into something good now, and help as many people as possible.”
“It makes me sad.” Charlie’s lower lip jutted out as she looked at Jack. “Maybe we should tear it down.”
“We’re not tearing it down.” Jack was adamant. “I already asked the construction company doing the renovation what we could do to mitigate … what it was.”
He looked pained. “There are certain city codes that must be followed. If we take down that building, it can never be put back up, and it will hurt our property values.”
“Fine.” Charlie turned sulky. “I’m going to go nuts and decorate with stuff from local artists.”
Jack chuckled and patted her hand before pulling onto the road. “That sounds like a fabulous idea.”
“HOLY WOW!” CHARLIE GAPED LIKE a fish as she stared at the mansion in front of us. It was three stories tall and surrounded by a wrought iron fence. There was a camera and intercom outside the gate, but I’d instructed Jack to park down the road.
“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Jack asked. He had a firm hold of Charlie’s hand. “Why aren’t we trying to drive in again?”
“Because I don’t particularly like the idea of being trapped on the other side of that gate if something goes wrong,” I replied.
“We’ll be trapped regardless. We can’t fit through those bars.”
“You can if I give you a little help.” I sent him a flat smile. “Besides, I don’t want them to know what you drive in case we have to do a little reconnaissance later.”
Jack cocked his head. He’d pulled his shoulder-length hair in a short ponytail this morning and somehow managed to look both fashionable and professional. It was weird how he could pull off different looks.
“What do you think is going to happen?” he asked.
“No idea. We’ll have to play it by ear.” I strode up to the intercom as if I belonged in this neighborhood and only an idiot would question me. My parents lived a few blocks away, so I did belong here.
Yeah, I didn’t believe it either.
“Hello,” I called out when a woman’s crackly voice answered. “I have an appointment with Mr. Hayes.”
I could see the woman’s image on the screen.
She was in a traditional maid’s uniform, proving the Hayes family really was made up of jerks.
She looked confused by my declaration, and the way her eyes roamed my outfit was obvious.
Ultimately, she nodded. She pressed the button, and the gate swung open.
Jack pulled Charlie forward as we walked through the opening. “I’m sorry, but that is some crap security right there,” he said. “You didn’t even say what your business was.”
“I have a feeling Archie has visitors who dress like me from the Quarter occasionally,” I volunteered. “You know, because he likes a little spice so close to bedtime.”
Jack didn’t respond, but Charlie was another story.
“Wait,” she said, grabbing my wrist. “Are you saying that the maid mistook you for a prostitute?”
She seemed upset at the prospect. Me? I was willing to use whatever advantage I could to get what I wanted. “It’s not the first time.” I grinned at her discomfort and walked up to the front door. I raised my hand to knock, but it was already swinging open.
The same maid from the intercom stood in front of me.
“He’s in the parlor,” she said, sounding tired. “Can you please be quick? All of you.” She gave Jack and Charlie a dubious look. “I don’t know if this is some ‘special’ meeting of the minds, but don’t drag things out. He’s a real menace today, and it’s time for his nap.”
I frowned. His nap? “I promise not to drag things out one second longer than necessary,” I said. “I’m sure his teeny tiny penis can’t last for more than two minutes or so.”
“Oh, I’ve thought so before,” the maid lamented. “What he lacks in stamina he makes up for with Viagra. He pops them like Tic-Tacs.”
That also was not surprising. “I swear we’ll be as quick as possible.”
Still looking dubious, the maid moved to the left to clear a path for us. She frowned at Jack as we passed. “He’ll kick you out,” she warned. “He can’t stand for anyone to look better than him naked.”
“I’ll take my chances,” Jack said, discomfort rolling off of him.
“Which way?” I asked the maid.
She pointed. “Through the glass doors. He’s on the couch.”
I strode forward, steeling myself with each step. When we got to the parlor I threw open the doors with gusto. I was prepared to put on a show. I made it only three steps, not as much as a single pithy word out of my mouth, when my eyes fell on the one person I wasn’t expecting.
In hindsight, after all the nasty things the maid had said, I should have realized we weren’t talking about the same Hayes.
It wasn’t Archie Hayes slumped on the settee pouting. No, it was Brett, and he didn’t look happy.
“Where’s my pizza,” Brett asked as he regarded me. “I ordered a pizza. You look like you deliver gumbo. I hate gumbo.”
I had no idea what that meant. Was there a stereotype of gumbo delivery people I wasn’t aware of? Rather than kick him in the ass for assuming I was a delivery person, I folded my arms over my chest.
“I wasn’t looking for this small-penised wonder,” I called out to no one in particular. “I was looking for the other one.”
The maid stopped in the doorway behind me. “Oh.” She looked taken aback. Had I been wrong about Archie’s proclivities? “I’m sorry.” She held out her hands. “You don’t look like his normal flavor. Did one of the agencies send you? If so, they made a grave mistake. It’s good that he’s not here.”
I was disappointed at that news. Not because I wanted to have sex with Archie. On his worst day he would be better to deal with than his mutant offspring, but because I had no choice I focused on Brett. “Do you remember me?”
“Yeah,” Brett answered. He’d slumped back on the settee, eyeing me with overt interest. “You were dancing on that pole three nights ago at Executive.”
Executive, as in Executive Gentleman Club. This guy needed a solid punch in the gonads. “No, I’m the woman who cleaned the ghouls out of your grandmother’s crawlspace.”
“Oh.” To my surprise, Brett sat straighter. “I do remember you. My father says you’re a fraud.”
“Your father probably says a lot of things that aren’t true,” I replied. “Only half of them have anything to do with his penis, right?”
Brett had the audacity to turn smug. “I knew I was bigger than him.”
I didn’t bother to hide my eye roll. This man was a child.
He needed to be treated like one, even if he was going to throw a tantrum in response.
I could deal with a tantrum. “That’s like comparing a thimble with a paper clip,” I replied.
“When things are that small, bigger doesn’t necessarily mean anything. ”
Brett’s eyes narrowed to dangerous slits. “If you’re not here with my pizza, why are you here?”
“To see your father. When will he be back?”
Brett shrugged in lazy fashion. “When he’s done with the whores in Baton Rouge? I honestly have no idea. Could be days. Could be weeks. He says Baton Rouge is better than New Orleans.”
So, he wasn’t out of the house, he was out of the city. That didn’t work for me. I glanced at Jack. He didn’t show signs of inserting himself into the conversation. Apparently, he was comfortable with me leading the way.
“You have to answer my questions,” I announced.
Brett looked bored. “If this is about the ghouls, I have no idea where they came from. My grandmother was probably feeding them or something. She’s old and stupid. She feeds the birds. I can totally see her feeding ghouls.”
I folded my arms over my chest. I hated this guy to my very marrow. He was the worst of the worst. He was old enough that I didn’t have hope he would outgrow his personality. Sometimes you could hope for that with children. Brett was beyond that potential.
“The day I received payment in your father’s office a statue was delivered,” I explained. “I need to see that statue.”
“What?” he asked, clearly confused.
“A statue,” I repeated. “It was of a naked woman.”
“Oh, right.” He barked out a humorless laugh. “She didn’t even have a good rack. Her boobs were tiny in comparison to what’s out there now. I told him he could at least get a statue that was fun to look at.”
Holding in my temper at this point was an exercise in control. “Where is the statue?” The goal was to bully Brett into giving me what I wanted. The way his eyes sharpened told me I’d made a mistake.
He was a bully who couldn’t be bullied back. Unfortunately, it was too late to change my tack.
“You can’t storm into my house and demand to see a statue that has nothing to do with you,” he shot back. “Why do you want to see it?”
“I have an affinity for art,” I lied.
“That’s my father’s statue. It’s in his suite. No one is allowed in his suite when he isn’t here. You’ll have to contact him if you want to see it when he gets back.”
“You just said it could be weeks before he gets back,” I pointed out.
He shrugged. “That’s not my problem.”
“I could make it your problem.”
“Somehow I doubt that.” Brett gave an imperious wave toward the door. “You don’t belong here. This is my house.”
“We just want to see the statue,” Charlie pleaded, taking the soft approach. “Please.”
“You’re cute.” Brett showed her his teeth in a smile that was more of a grimace. “Like genuinely adorable. But you’re not my type. Your boobs are way too small.”
Charlie sent a look to Jack, who shook his head and grabbed her hand.
“We’ll get out of your hair,” Jack said.
I made a protesting sound. I was nowhere near done with this guy.
“We’ll get out of your hair,” Jack, his eyes on me, repeated, this time more forcefully. “We can wait to see the statue.”
Sensing temporary defeat, I gave up. For now. “Fine.” I shot a warning look back toward Brett. “This isn’t over.”
“Good for you.” Brett sent me a sarcastic thumbs-up. “I like my vixens spicy. I don’t like the pink thing you’re doing with your hair. I prefer big boobs and blondes. Keep that in mind.”
I let Jack and Charlie steer me, practically snarling, past the dubious maid and out of the house.
Jack waited until we were on the sidewalk again to speak. “You can’t bully that guy. He’s too much of an idiot. If you need to see the statue you have to think of a different way.”
“Oh, I’m going to see it,” I assured him.
“Well, good luck.” Jack was matter-of-fact. “If you get arrested, we’ll provide bail money. But we won’t get involved in anything illegal.”
Of course they weren’t. They were goody-goodies. That was great when it came to trusting my new partners, but annoying when looking for a partner in crime.
“Don’t worry about that,” I said. “My parents have bailed me out more than once. They’re used to it.”
“How many times?” Charlie asked.
I honestly couldn’t remember. “Enough times that my father swears I won’t get an inheritance.”
“Do you believe him?”
“No, but he likes to talk big.”
“How are you going to get back into that house?” Jack, deadly serious, asked. “They have cameras everywhere.”
The cameras didn’t bother me. The number of people working inside the house did. “I’ll figure it out.”
I would see that statue again. One way or another.