THIRTY-SEVEN
End Of January
I thought junior year was going to be easy and not complicated. Running into Damon changed everything, my entire college plan down the drain. He corrupted me. All of me. No matter what I tried to do to push him away, it just didn’t work.
After I found out the truth behind everything he did, it destroyed me more. Everything about him will destroy me. I knew it from the moment I saw him before I knew the truth. And yet I fell for him, anyway.
He wanted me and he got me. My own personal perspective… I fell in love with a psychopath. I know my life and my baby's life are on the line right now. I'm definitely one hundred percent sure he'll figure out a way to save us both. He's Damon Saint after all.
He would shed every last drop of blood to keep us safe. I have no doubt about it.
Smiling at my journal entry, I shove the tiny book away under my mattress, opening my laptop. I began studying for exams. This week couldn't be any worse? Could it? Sighing, I close the laptop and saunter into the kitchen.
Coffee always makes my day, but I'm not allowed to drink it. According to Damon, the baby specialist, coffee doesn't mix, so I'm sticking with tea. Dropping the tea bag into the mug, I rest my nose against the rim, inhaling the sweet scents of mint.
I have never been more afraid for my life—afraid of losing a family I just earned and afraid of losing my child.
"You're not studying?" Bailey grins at me as she enters the condo with bags of groceries in her arms.
I shoot her a glare as I stir the tea gently. "I'm taking a small break, actually. I've been staring at that screen for far too long." I smile.
My blonde friend eyes me for a second, her eyes filling with something similar to hope before it quickly disappears. What is up with her lately? She has been so distracted and so distant it's confusing me.
She doesn't know about Ace's new life. Though I know she's still dating that cheating boyfriend of hers. The same boyfriend she believes isn't cheating when everyone else knows he is.
Shaking the thought from my brain, I pull the tea bag from my cup and toss it out before taking a sip from my black tea. Mm . This is what I live for, well not exactly. "Do you want to invite Scarlet over and talk about it?" I ask, eying her facial expression.
She shakes her head before beginning to shove the groceries away. I want to help her, but I don't exactly know what's wrong. She won’t talk to me. I doubt she is talking to Scarlet about it, either.
Shoving a fake smile on my lips, I disappear into my bedroom with my cup of tea. Sliding back into bed, I open up my laptop and begin studying all my notes over this past semester. Damn .
I met Damon in September, and we started dating in November—if you'd call it that. It wasn’t dating but close. I got pregnant at the beginning of December. How time flies. Smiling to myself, I rest a hand on my stomach, gazing down with an admired smile.
I'm still avoiding certain death from his mother, still dodging bullets here and there, but I'm happy. I haven't felt happy very many times in my life, but right now? I can say I'm the happiest I have been.
I get to find out the gender in less than three weeks, and I couldn't be more excited. I mean, Damon's been grumbling about wanting it to be a surprise, but how can we buy clothing for our baby if we don't know if it's a girl or boy.
Sighing, I stare back into the computer screen again, studying all my typed notes. I must have drifted off to sleep because the next thing I'm aware of is someone peppering kisses on my cheeks.
Fluttering my eyes open, I focus on him and a smile pulls at my lips. Damon . Grabbing a hold of his shirt, I pull him on my bed next to me. "How was the hockey game?" I smile at him. He shoots me a grin, telling me all I need to know.
They won. I press a kiss to his cheek and rest my head against him. "Sorry I couldn't be there," I whisper, staring up at his beautiful face. I wanted to, but the morning sickness was so ridiculous I wouldn't have handled being in a car.
Damon's eyes focus on me and he smiles softly, pressing a kiss to my nose. "Studying is important to you, baby. And the morning sickness was really bad this morning, so it's okay."
I snuggle closer to his chest and smile lightly. "You have to get over the gender reveal thing. How are we supposed to buy clothing if we don't know what to expect," I say softly, bringing my eyes up to him.
Damon sighs, a frown touching his lips as he watches me. "I want it to be a surprise because I want the happiness to be more extreme when our baby enters this world," he whispers in my hair.
I guess that makes sense. At least some of it.
A nod takes over my head before I realise what's happening. "Okay, it can be a surprise." I sigh with a soft smile. Damon's lips meet mine as I wrap one arm around his neck and pull him closer to me.
I didn't know I could love someone so much in this world when this dark-haired asshole with a bad attitude walked into my life. The man I shouldn't have wanted, but I fought the forbidden side to keep.
A smile touches my lips at the thought, and I start giggling. He pulls back, a frown on his lips as he tilts his head and watches me. "When I first ever met you, you told me to get the fuck out of your seat and now look where we are." I hold my stomach as I hiccup more laughs.
Time flies and I still can't believe that first day I met him. Was only a small glimpse of him. He was so much more dangerous than any man could be. But I fell in love with a monster no matter how hard I tried not to.
Damon smiles at me before that smile becomes a smirk. "I saw that differently in my head. I mean, when I saw a hot brunette I didn't know sitting in my seat I wanted to say something, but it came out as a demand because I was such an asshole."
An asshole would be an understatement; he was so much worse than he even realises.
Smirking, I wrap my arm around his neck and slide my tongue down his throat. Our tongue tangles for dominance as our kisses become greedy. This man means the world to me, and I was right. He shattered me. So unbelievably shattered.
He wrecked me and stole my heart all in one.
Broken and helpless and he saved my life and he put me back together. Another smile touches my lips at the thought. "I love you," I whisper. I have never loved anyone the way I love him.
"I love you, Cinderella," Damon mumbles against my lips. I grin again, yanking his head down and smashing my lips into his. This forbidden love we have ventured into. It's ours. Forever.
March
I closed my eyes for the one hundred and tenth day I've been attending this class. It's not doing much for my brain, but perhaps it's teaching me something so I can defend my child and my girl. Reopening my eyes, I set my world to the side, needing a break. Boxing should help me release some stress I've been holding in.
Wrapping the boxing wrap around my fists and my wrists, I stalk over to a punching bag, slamming my fist into the bag as hard as I can.
She fucking threatened Hanna.
Four fucking months ago, she threatened my family. Clenching my teeth, I slam my fist into the bag again. Throwing another punch to the middle right after. The bag swings back and forth, the chains rattling above me.
"We're closing." Someone rests their hand on my shoulder. Spinning around, I get ready to throw another punch. Relaxing, I stare into Chloe's eyes as she frowns. Chloe owns this place; I hired her just to spite my mother.
Chloe is the baby my mother gave up. She had a baby before she was with my father, and I looked into dirt I could have on her to keep her in her place. So I had ways to destroy my mother in more ways than one. I came here to learn martial arts, but I also occasionally do some boxing.
A sigh falls from my lips. "Sorry," I mutter, tearing the wrap from my hands as I walk over to the bench. Grabbing my towel and all my things, I head for the locker rooms. I need to put my mother down. Now more than ever.
Resting my head against the wall of the lockers, I let out a sigh. This mafia shit is really taking over my mind and I can't think about anything else. Hell . Hanna and I haven't had sex in a month because my mind has been so occupied.
No, that ends today, even if my mind is still crazy as hell. I'm not gonna leave her hormonal without release any longer. Pulling my shirt over my head, I wipe my sweaty forehead before shoving the shirt into my locker.
Digging through my bag, I pull out my phone, quickly dialling Hanna. "Hello?" she mutters into the phone. A frown touches my lips when I realise she's actually talking to me. I've barely given her any attention since before exams for the first semester ended.
All I do is spend all my time plotting revenge or here at this gym and workout arena. She deserves better, especially after I fought to keep her.
Sighing, I stare off at the clock before replying to my beautiful girl. "Be ready to get naked tonight, I have big plans." I smirk even though she can't see me. I hold in the groan that forms in my throat at the thought of railing Hanna's tight pussy.
I can feel her smile on the other side of the phone. A grin is definitely touching those plump lips. "Yes, sir." She giggles into the line. Fuck, I have missed her laugh.
"See you soon, Cinderella." I smile before ending the call. Quickly shoving my phone into my bag, I strip out of all my work out clothing, disappearing into the showers.
Once the water touches my skin, I repeat a little smile appearing. I can't shut her out. I know my mind is buzzing, but she's everything to me and I can't just shut her out.
Closing my eyes, I run my fingers through my wet hair before stepping out of the stall and wrapping my towel around my waist. Leave it to my mother to get stuck in my head and ruin my fucking junior year.
Another sigh falls from my lips as I scrub the towel through my wet hair. I'm determined to keep her out of my mind and away from my family. Pulling a black T-shirt over my head, I slip on a pair of boxers before sliding my black skinny jeans up my legs.
She doesn't control my life , I repeat to myself again as I head out of the locker rooms. "See you next week," I call to Chloe as she sprays cleaner on the punching bags.
"Next week?" She widens her eyes and watches me.
A smile spreads across my face before I head toward the exit. "My family needs me," I call out before the exit door shuts behind me.
Chloe is Lexi's older sister—they have the same dad. I found that out after my first day here because I saw Lexi and asked Chloe about it. Once Chloe found out her sister used to bully people because she hated who she was and what happened so many years ago. She's my half-sister, we share the same mother because of the fact that my mother had an affair when I was two years old.
Chloe lost it on her sister because of what she used to go through when she was still in school. A smile falls on my lips again at the memory. I ruined a friendship in a way by telling her that. Lexi can't hangout with Emma anymore, which I'm definitely fine with.
I wish I could kill the bitch, but of course, no, I can't do that, either. Rounding the corner, I crash into a body. Fuck . I stare at my mother where she stands and realise she's definitely in a mood right now.
A sigh falls from my lips as she stares up at me with a glare. "Son! Just the man I was looking for." She grins at me. Jesus . Can't she get a life? What am I saying? I haven't had one for three months. Closing my eyes briefly, I eye the woman standing in front of me.
"What do you want?" I ground my teeth together.
My mother stares at me with a wicked smile on her lips. "You've been avoiding me. Soren and Damien have shown up, but not you."
Is this woman insane? "I have nothing to say to you," I growl.
She stares at me blankly before she swipes a knife out of her pocket. "You caught that girl is a weakness and then I realised why you keep her hidden away. I know who she is now. Hanna Sovrano. The outfit princess," she snarls.
I clench my jaw so hard my teeth ache. "You wanna do this? Here? Now," I growl in her face. My mother shoots me a grin before her smile falls when she notices the look in my eyes.
I'm not here to chitchat. If she wants to fuck with me, she will die. "Where's your pack of soldiers to save you now?" I taunt. Her eyes harden as she watches me with her nude lips pursed in disgust.
She launches at me, but I sidestep just in time, grabbing her throat and squeezing at the same time as I shove her against the wall beside me. My mother screeches in pain as I crush her throat with my bare hand.
Well, that's what happens when you're fucking stupid and don't think before you attack, which doesn't seem like her style. Shoving her to the ground, I step over her and shove my boot to her throat.
Gripping my gun in my hand, I shove it into her temple and growl like an animal. My mother eyes me with dark and terrified eyes. She didn't expect this from me, and I'm glad I had the element of surprise. I slide the gun harshly against her neck before I bare my teeth at her.
I drag her behind the building into a cold dark alley so she can die and nobody, and I mean nobody, can accuse me of anything. If there are no witnesses, then there's no crime. That's what she taught us, and now she's about to get a taste of her own medicine.
"You will never fucking threaten my family again. I hope hell treats you with disrespect," I seethe. I shove my gun to her lips and pull the trigger with a satisfied smirk. My mother's body drops like nothing. Blood splattered against the concrete as I turn on my heel and leave her laying on the ground like a corpse to be forgotten. I head home to the people who love me.
Present
Being three and a half months pregnant is nothing even close to easy. With Damon never here, never with me, life has become harder the bigger my stomach has gotten.
The jingling of keys tears me out of my thoughts as my head pops over to the direction of my and Bailey's condo door. It could possibly be Bailey, because Damon said he was coming here twenty minutes ago.
I should know better than to keep my hopes up because lately we barely see each other. He's either at that fucking gym or at home with the boys. Ever since he killed his mother, he still keeps away from me.
Damon's head pops through the door and he gives me a soft smile. I swear my heart jumps out of my chest just at the sight of him. God. I missed him. I didn’t realise how much until now.
"I'm so sorry, baby. I ran into someone and had to deal with some business for Damien." He stops, his jaw clenched in anger. Damien became capo of the famiglia after Damon slaughtered their mother, and now he's at his brother's beck and call.
He drops down on the couch next to me. Crawling across the couch, I settle my giant belly in his lap. I have missed my man so much. My dangerous yet amazing fucking man.
Wrapping my arms around his neck, my lips meet his. The pecks and quick kisses for three months are gone. This kiss is all passion, all lust, nothing but love. And I do, I love him. I love him more than anything in my freaking universe.
Damon's tongue parts my lips as his tangles with mine. Eagerness takes over everything. Before I can register what happens next, I pull his T-shirt off his body, pressing my lips to every inch of his marvellous chest.
"Mmm, I want you naked," he growls as he rips open my oversized clothes, which I bought in the last month. A smirk appears on my lips as I resume kissing him. "So sexy, so beautiful."
My hands move to his jeans as I begin unbuttoning them, tearing them down his legs to the floor beside us. His hand slides through my dark hair, his lips attaching to my neck. Sucking on all my sensitive skin. My head falls backwards in pure pleasure.
His hands slide behind my back, ripping my bra from my body and tossing it across my living room. I smash my lips back into his. His hands slide off my sweatpants, tossing them to the floor with every other piece of clothing.
"God, I love you, my beautiful woman," he whispers as his mouth presses kisses to my breasts. A moan escapes my lips at his assault on my tits. The heat in my lower stomach travels to my core, leaving soaking wet arousal leaking from my pussy.
We may be twenty-three, but we're going to be together forever, and I know that for a fact. My body is pushed back as he removes his boxers and settles between my thighs. My eyes track his every move as he presses soft kisses to my seven-month pregnant stomach.
Damon's head drops between my thighs, his tongue circling my clit before he slides it down to my opening. Lapping up my arousal and earning himself a shock wave of wetness to drip onto his tongue. "Who do you belong to, Cinderella? Whose tongue makes you come?"
"God. Yours. I'm yours," I whimper, grabbing fistfuls of his hair and yanking him back up to me. "I just… I need you inside me." Damon smirks at me before bracing himself at my entrance. Slowly, he enters me before his hips jerk forward.
He slams inside me once, torturing me with the slow pace as he pulls out just to slam back in. "Oh my god," I moan, throwing my head back on the couch cushion.
His hands wrapped around my thighs as he pounds into me. A muffled moan escapes my lips as the orgasm takes over. My pussy drips all over his cock, soaking his entire shaft in my arousal.
Fuck . I needed this. "Damon!" A ripped scream leaves my mouth as the orgasm flows through my body at such a fast pace. Damon's hips move quickly as his lips part in pleasure. The sound of wet slapping flesh is all you can hear above his groans.
"Shit, Hanna…" he groans, spilling into me. Slowly he pulls out, and my head falls back, trying to catch my breath after the shock wave of my orgasm. Soft breaths fall across my face as Damon presses his lips to mine.
My lips part into a tired grin. "Shit! Not on my couch!" Bailey yells as the front door slaps open. Shuffling, I grab onto the throw blanket and cover myself and Damon quickly. My eyes slide toward my friend in horror.
"You're far too late." Damon smirks as he licks his lips. A frustrated groan falls from her lips as she stomps into the kitchen. Next comes laughter from someone standing by the door.
Tilting my head, I look up at Ace as he holds his stomach, shaking with laughter. Ace? What's he doing here?
Damon shoots his friend a warning glare, but Ace's laughter continues to fill the room. I shake my head in disbelief, keeping myself covered with the blanket, causing the blankets to fall off Damon's ass. "Shit, Saint. Nice cheeks." Ace smirks.
Laughter falls from my lips the moment the words leave Ace's mouth. Oh my . Covering my mouth, I continue to wheeze, clutching my pregnant belly.
"Oh, shut it," Damon grumbles, covering his ass with the corner of the blanket. I watch his eyes trail over Ace, his eyebrow raises in general confusion. "Wait? Why the hell are you here?"
Ace's mouth falls open before it closes it again, staying silent. "I saw him at the grocery store. He's helping me carry in a new lamp I just bought." Bailey smiles as she exits the kitchen and stares at us. Mhm . Yeah, that's totally why he's here.
I try to hide my smirk but fail to stay hidden the longer I stare at my friend and her stupid lie—one she should know I would never even believe.
Or they were about to do what we just finished. A grin covers my lips as I watch my best friend. "Jesus, Hanna! I can have a friend!" she exclaims. Friend. Yes, he's totally not her friend, but whatever floats her boat.
Ace's face falls again before he puts his neutral expression back on his stone-cold face. "Well, I need to talk to you and the boys. Could you meet me at home?" Ace asks, staring at Damon. It must be mafia business or else he wouldn't need to leave my house.
He nods as he grips my thighs and carries me into the bedroom, letting the blanket fall off his naked ass. A giggle erupts from my lips as the blankets sway around us. Damon gently lays me on the bed before pressing kisses to my cheek. His concern for me since the pregnancy has never been more serious.
"I'll be back after the conversation." He smiles at me before wrapping the throw blanket around his waist.
A grin pulls at my lips as I stare up at him. "Maybe when you return, you could let me slide onto your face and grind my pussy against your tongue?"
Damon's lips lift into a deep grin as he places one last kiss on my head. "Most definitely. I need to taste you more than once today, that's for sure," he replies through his smile.
"There's cum on my fucking couch!" Bailey shrieks, shattering my conversation and dirty thoughts in a second. Laughter falls from my lips as Damon leaves me on the bed and disappears back into the living room. A sigh falls from my lips as I fall back, wrapping my large blanket around my exposed body.
A small smile crawls its way to my lips as my mind wanders. He's going to be with me for a long time. We're going to have each other for as long as we both decide. He might have to help his brother run the mafia world, but I will be there for him through it all.
He saved me. He saved me from a world that wanted me dead and claimed me as his own. I'm his. Truly forever.
Damon is the drug I could never shake. Nothing has been the same since he growled in my face all those months ago, and it definitely didn’t change after I learned all I did about him.
Forbidden love isn't supposed to last, but ours did. And now we can have it. Forever.