Chapter 13 #2
I appreciate all that Tony does. He’s been with me anytime I’ve been away from my house since arriving at Mike’s wedding. Tonight, I need to just be Deidre. I need a break to be the real me, even if just for a few hours.
We make our way inside, taking the elevator up to Luke’s floor. Once the doors open, we take the elevator back down, all the way to the garage where his car is parked. I put the directions into my phone and Luke starts the drive over to the Hills.
“We don’t have to stay long,” I say once we’re on the road.
“Doesn’t matter to me."
“I just have to make an appearance,” I mention. “There’s a chance that we might be doing business with one of the people attending, so I’ve got to show up and schmooze. It’s a Hollywood thing.”
“Do you want me to just wait out in the car?”
“God, no,” I laugh. “Not unless you want to. Do you not want to go in?”
“I just didn’t know if I’d be in the way.”
“You’d be my excuse to get away from any weird conversations or to leave the party altogether,” I say. “Mandy would have been my wingman if you weren’t down this weekend.”
“I don’t mind at all.”
“Just an FYI,” I preface. “There’s a chance for…things to be seen.”
“Things?” Luke repeats.
“Yeah,” I confirm. “Like…drugs and stuff. It’s common.” I barely pause, needing Luke to understand something. “I won’t be doing any. I’m not into that. I don’t judge those who do, but I just wanted to warn you because it’ll just be out in the open.”
Luke chuckles, “I know.”
“Know what?”
“You,” he replies, but he doesn’t explain further.
When we arrive, the valet takes the keys and we’re ushered inside the house.
Luke stays by my side, giving me distance when he catches me chatting with a few people.
I make sure to introduce him and bring him into the conversation.
I’d do the same thing if Mandy were here.
It’s easier when I don’t have Victoria or any of her team members hovering to include others.
Sometime later, I excuse myself from a conversation, needing to use the restroom.
I let Luke know where I’m going so he doesn’t feel like I’m ditching him.
As if I haven’t been in the room, I’m able to slip out of sight to head out of the grand living room in search of the closest bathroom.
The first one I come to is locked, so I make my way down the half-flight of stairs to a lower level.
It isn’t until I get to the far end of the house that I find a large guest room with a bathroom that is open and free from the crazy party.
“Hey, cutie,” a voice calls from my left as I exit the bathroom.
“Hey.”
He’s a friend of a friend of the host, but I don’t remember his name.
“It’s good to see you again,” he says, reaching for my hand as he continues to sit on the bed.
“Yeah,” I lie, taking a step away from him.
“Hey,” he calls, grabbing my wrist. “Where are you going?”
“Back to the party.”
He gestures to the empty room. “The party is here.”
“Yeah,” I giggle, trying to keep my cool. “With the way the music is playing, it does feel like it’s here.”
“Come on,” he coaxes, standing and pulling me into him. His breath reeks of alcohol and something else. “Dance with me.”
“I’d love to, but my boyfriend won’t like that. He’s the jealous type.”
“You don’t have a boyfriend,” he challenges, swaying us to the beat. “I know you don’t. You’re app says so.”
“I do,” I fib. “He’s the guy I came with tonight. We just don’t make our relationship public.”
“Don’t lie,” he says with his voice becoming a little stern. “I don’t like it when girls lie to me.”
I pull away. “I’m not lying.”
“Yes, you are,” he states, holding me tighter. “Besides, it’s time for you to know how a real man takes charge with his woman.”
“I’m good, thanks,” I counter, pushing him away as he tries to kiss me.
“Don’t fight it,” he instructs. “You know you like it.”
“No, I don’t,” I choke out, becoming concerned about the predicament.
“It’s okay, baby,” he soothes. “Don’t be scared. I’m going to take good care of you.”
I push harder, trying to break free from his grip. His fingers are so tight I can feel my skin burning as I yank away. When that doesn’t work, I jab my knee into his groin and move to flee.
“Oh, no you don’t,” he growls in pain, snatching me by my hair. “You’re not going anywhere.”
“Please,” I beg, stumbling to keep my footing.
“That’s right, baby, “ he taunts. “You’ll be begging for more as I give you what you really want.”
“I don’t want it,” I reply as tears start to threaten my eyes.
“Yeah, you do.” He throws me onto the bed. “And I’m going to give it to you.”
“No!” I scream as he crawls over me. My arms and legs punch and kick, but it’s like I’m hitting a brick wall. “Stop!”
“You won’t be asking me to stop once I get started,” he announces, holding my hands above my head.
My breath catches when I realize that this just might happen, as I can’t get my arms or legs free to get away.
“Now, be a good girl.”
“No!” I scream, fighting with everything I’ve got. At some point, one of my hands break free and I smack him in the face. When that doesn’t do anything, I aim for his eye, but I miss.
“Stop that,” he commands, smacking me across the face.
My head feels dizzy as a ringing sound drowns out everything.
I feel another blow to my other cheek that forces my head to fly the other way.
The sensation of a hand getting a hold of my dress like it’s going to rip is felt.
My body tries to protect itself by curling into a protective ball.
Suddenly, I don’t feel the weight of him.
Choking back my tears, I see another body in the dark room.
I blink back the wetness, trying to understand what’s happening.
The light from the hallway shines a certain way and I catch a glimpse of a face. “Luke?”
His body freezes and quickly turns to me for a few seconds.
“Luke,” I sigh as my body shakes, grateful to know he’s here.
Luke throws one more solid punch into my assailant before turning toward me. “You okay, Dei?” He cradles me carefully in his arms.
“Yeah,” I mumble, fighting the desire to pull away from his touch. “What about….”
“Don’t worry about him,” Luke directs heatedly. “Are you okay? Did he….”
“No,” I whimper, feeling as if it did happen.
Luke holds my face gently. Concern pouring from his eyes.
“Luke?” I whimper.
“Yeah."
“Can we go?” I ask meekly.
“Yeah.”
“We need to sneak out without anyone seeing us,” I say.
“We need to call the cops and press?—”
“No!” I snap, interrupting him. “Please…let’s just go. I don’t want this getting back to Victoria or Tony.”
“You sure?”
“Yes,” I confirm. “This can’t be in the news. He didn’t…I’m okay. Let’s just go, please.”
“Okay,” he agrees, standing and helping me up.
I don’t know how, but we make it out of the house through a sliding glass door that is in the adjacent room.
Luke uses the light on his phone to guide us around the house to a set of steps that lead up to the front while his arm is draped around me.
When we reach the valet, I pretend to be drunk and curl into Luke’s body while we wait for the car.
Luke holds my hand the whole way back to his place. I’m grateful for the comfort even though my body feels as if it’s burning. When we get inside the apartment, Luke heads into the bathroom while I sit on the edge of the bed. A few moments later, he’s back and turns all of the lights on.
“I’d like to check for any marks,” Luke requests.
“Marks?”
His head bobs. “To make sure he didn’t hurt you.”
Unsure of what to do, I simply stand still while I let Luke search my arms and legs. Other than a few scratches and bumps that might turn into bruises, I’m okay. My mind wanders as my eyes fixate on a shadow across the room.
“I started the shower for you,” he states. “Thought you might want to wash up.”
“Yeah. I’d like that.”
At some point, I find myself sitting on the tile floor, crying about how I left myself so vulnerable.
I can’t put off taking self-defense classes anymore.
Tony needs to be around whenever I’m in public from here on out.
This was my fault. I’m ashamed that I could believe that it would just be normal.
“Dei?” Luke’s voice calls from the doorway.
“Yeah?”
Hearing his voice is both alarming and comforting at the same time. My heart hurts having these mixed emotions for a guy I know I can trust.
He cracks the door open. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” I lie, sucking back tears.
“You hungry or thirsty?” he asks, suddenly sounding closer.
I look over my shoulder and see him sitting on the toilet with his back to me. An odd feeling washes over me. Is it wrong that I wish he were in the shower with me? My body craves the comfort of his arms, but another part of me is disgusted at the fact that I need him—a man.
“Maybe a little,” I reply.
“Ice cream sounds good?”
“Yeah,” I reply with the corner of my mouth tugging up a little at how well he knows me.
He doesn’t move.
“Luke?” I ask timidly.
“Yeah, Dei?”
“You gonna let me finish?” I inspect.
“No,” he admits. “I mean, yes. But I don’t want to wait in the other room and hear you cry. I thought it’d be easier for both of us if I were in here.”
A smile reaches my lips despite the churning in my stomach. “Thanks.”
It hurts to know that he’s bothered by what happened tonight.
Luke sighs as if he’s ready for me to kick him out. “You’re welcome.”
After about another minute, I call, “Luke.”
“Yeah?”
“I’m ready for some ice cream.”
Luke stands up and retrieves a towel. He places it on the sink and leaves the room. The door remains open, but the bathroom is large enough that he can’t see me even if it were wide open.
There’s a mild hesitation within me to get out, knowing that I’m naked and that he’s just beyond the wall. It’s not that I don’t trust him—more a matter of flashes of what happened earlier.
When I enter the bedroom, Luke offers me one of his t-shirts.
I smile at the gesture and accept it. I had brought clothes, but I’m sure he didn’t feel comfortable going through my stuff.
I take the shirt into the bathroom and change.
When I realize that the shirt isn’t enough coverage, I ask for shorts.
A few seconds later, Luke’s arm extends inside the doorway with a pair in hand.
Exiting the bathroom, I find Luke sitting on the edge of the bed.
I can tell that tonight wasn’t easy on him.
My eyes catch a glimpse of something on his hand, and that’s when I realize that he’s probably just as, if not more, physically hurt than I am.
Without saying a word, I grab one of the small washcloths and dampen it with warm water.
I kneel in front of him, gently take his right hand, and dab softly at the blood and cuts on his knuckles.
Luke doesn’t wince as I clean his wounds.
I try to offer a sympathetic and apologetic smile, but his face remains stoic with a hint of something in his eyes.
I check the cabinet to see if he has anything to treat the cuts, but there’s nothing.
I grab some of the essential oils I always travel with and apply a few of them together with some of my coconut lotion.
“I’m sorry,” I mumble.
“For what?” he asks with surprise.
“For you getting hurt.”
“You have nothing to apologize for, Dei.”
I nod, but continue to avoid his eyes.
“Do you think that what happened is your fault?” he asks wearily.
“No…” I lie. “Just you getting hurt.”
“Dei,” he calls, prompting me to look at him. “I will always be there for you.”
A tear threatens to fall as so many emotions swirl through me.
Luke’s gaze is raw and expressive as he tries to hide his feelings.
Part of me wants to run, disgusted with myself that he had to see me like this again, while another part of me wants to kiss him, ease us both from the memory.
I wish I could take it all back like it never happened.
Something has changed between us, and I’m not sure exactly what.
My heart pounds in my chest as my veins continue to pump the adrenaline that persists.
A part of me wants to go home, ashamed that I allowed this to happen and that he had to be here to see it.
Another part of me feels completely exposed, where nothing matters anymore, and all I want to do is comfort him with the touch of my body on his.
We stay in the bedroom long enough for my knees to ache from kneeling. I use his thighs to lift myself as Luke offers assistance. Once we’re both standing, he pulls me into him, wrapping his arms around me protectively. My body tenses, but a few seconds later it lessens, knowing I’m safe.
Moments later, we’re in his bed watching a movie and eating ice cream. Luke keeps his distance as we barely speak. Was all our flirting in my head? Was it all just joking? Is Luke just not interested in me? Is he ashamed to be near me now? Have I ruined our friendship because of tonight?