Chapter Three #2
“Hey, you going to take your break soon?” Cameron asked as he walked towards me. “Dillon’s going to try to stop by a bit later. He’s out with his friends tonight, the ones he’s moving in with.”
“Oh, yeah? How’s that going?”
Cameron ran a hand over his face. “I don’t fucking know. It’s like watching my baby leave the house. And he’s not even my kid.”
“Stop lying to yourself. He’s yours. You raised him. Maybe not from birth, but you raised him. And he’s growing up, going to college, making friends. And now he’s moving out on his own. He’s doing damn well.”
“You say that, but I’m afraid everything’s going to get fucked up because I didn’t do a good enough job.”
I raised a brow and looked at the other man even as I pulled another draft. “That kid got into a private college, even after getting into the state one he’s currently at. He’s transferring this fall on a partial scholarship to a place that doesn’t give a lot of them. He worked his ass off.”
“He did. It’ll be weird not having him at the school right downtown. Where he can simply walk over and see us during the day if we’re here and he wants to.”
“He’ll still be close, though, right?”
“Yeah. It’s just weird that he’s growing up.”
“He’s nineteen, man. He’s already grown up.”
“Don’t remind me.”
“So you and Violet ever going to have kids of your own?” I asked, not even sure where that question had come from.
Cameron raised his brows. “Have to ask her to marry me first.”
“You better get on that. I mean, Brendon’s already hitched. And I think Sienna and Aiden are well on their way. You don’t want Aiden to beat you, do you?”
“You’re a shit-stirrer. And of course I don’t want Aiden to beat me.
” He mumbled the last part, probably because he didn’t want his woman to hear.
As much as she loved the brothers, I didn’t really think that Violet wanted to know that a proposal might be coming sooner rather than later only so Cameron could do it before Aiden did.
Not that she’d say no. At least, I didn’t think she would.
All three couples were happy and in pre—and post—wedded bliss.
It was nice to see, even though I wanted no part of it for myself.
My gaze strayed to Meadow once again. She smiled at me, though it didn’t quite reach her eyes.
Oh, good. Fuck this.
I was losing my damn mind. I really needed to get her out of my head.
But I didn’t think I would be able to. After all, I hadn’t been able to before, even when she was so off-limits that it probably would’ve meant someone literally slicing my throat if I moved in too close.
Those barriers weren’t there as much anymore, but the remnants still remained. The shadows. I didn’t want any part of that. Or, at least, I shouldn’t.
“So, you’re going to take your break?”
I shook my head. “Maybe another half hour. We’re about to hit that lull, and I’ll let Ben take over for a while. Sound good?”
Cameron nodded, took the beers I had poured for him, and headed over to the table.
Brendon and Cameron had already sat down, Aiden moving back and forth between the booth and the kitchen.
A big group had just finished getting their food, so I figured Aiden would wrap up for the night.
He’d technically been off shift for the past hour, but the man never let his kitchen go without him for too long.
He might trust his staff, but he was very anal-retentive when it came to his food.
I didn’t mind, though. It was damn good grub.
Thirty minutes passed, and the lull indeed came. I nodded at Ben, who took control of the bar, and I went back to the storeroom. I’d make sure that we had everything ready for when I got back, and then I would actually take my break.
As soon as I turned the corner and passed the billiards area where we’d hosted a pool tournament at one point, Meadow walked from the other direction. She’d probably come from the bathroom area.
I wanted to touch her. Wanted to be close to her.
She did something to me that made no sense. But I was stronger than these feelings. I had to be. When she looked up, and her eyes widened, I knew I wasn’t resilient enough to resist her.
I was a fucking bastard, and I didn’t care anymore. I’d tried to be good for so long. Had even succeeded in some respects, but I wasn’t going to be good anymore. I didn’t think I could be.
“Oh. I didn’t know you were back here,” she said, her voice a little breathy.
I leaned against the wall, blocking her way. Then I smirked. I knew she hated that. Every time I did it, her eyes narrowed, and a little crease formed on her brow.
But her eyes always went to my mouth, so maybe she didn’t hate it that much.
“Just coming back here before I take my break. Why don’t you take it with me?” Jesus Christ, that was the worst line ever. I wasn’t very good at things like that, especially when it came to her. But that was fine. I wasn’t good at many things.
“I think we’re okay. We had enough of that already, didn’t we?”
Surprised that she had alluded to the kiss, I raised a single brow.
“You did kiss me back.”
“And then I ran away.” Her voice was a little sharp, and I blinked.
“I figured you had to be home by midnight or something.”
“I’m not Cinderella. I didn’t go home in a pumpkin. I took a Lyft.” She raised a brow in response. “Honestly, I’m surprised your ego can fit in this hallway. Just saying.”
“Well, it’s a heavy burden to bear, but I manage. You should go out with me.”
Fuck, why did I say that?
“No. Never.” Her voice shook a bit, and she lowered her gaze. “I can’t.”
Jesus Christ. I knew she couldn’t. Why we shouldn’t. I didn’t think she knew all of it, though. “Meadow.” I reached out and lifted her chin as I gently caressed her skin. “You don’t have to be wary of me.”
Or should she be?
“I’m not afraid of you.” I didn’t know if I could taste the lie, but it definitely didn’t sound entirely truthful.
“We could be friends, though. Right?”
“That kiss wasn’t about friendship.”
“No, it wasn’t. But we have a lot of mutual friends. You’re going to be coming into this bar often with them. That means you’ll have to deal with me. Maybe we should make sure that we stay friends.”
“Only friends?”
“Jesus. I don’t know. I like you. I want you. And you want me. I can tell. Let’s do something about it.” I paused. “If you only want to be friends? Then I’ll do my best to keep things that way."
She snorted and shook her head. But she didn’t pull back. My fingers were still on her skin. Still gently caressing. Damn it, she was such a temptation. I needed to step away.
“Like I said. Ego much?”
“I like my big…ego.” I didn’t look down at my crotch when I said it, but she did.
A pretty blush stained her cheeks, and I grinned.
“Come out with me.”
“I shouldn’t. I can’t.”
“Shouldn’t and can’t are two very different things. Which one is it, baby?”
And then I lowered my head and fell into the abyss and my bad decisions. I kissed her again, a brush of lips, a sweet caress of sin.
My tongue snaked out, parting her lips, and she moaned. But she didn’t pull away. Instead, she put her hands on my chest, her fingernails digging into my flesh through my shirt.
And when I stepped back, her pupils were large, dark. Her throat worked as she swallowed hard.
“I shouldn’t.”
“Maybe not. But let’s try it out anyway.”
I really should not be doing this. Just like she shouldn’t. There was only one way this ended. Actually, there were two possibilities. Heartache or death. Or both.
But I didn’t care. So when she nodded, just a little movement, a way to say yes, something twisted inside me.
I didn’t want to hurt her, but I craved her. But I craved her.
I only hoped that with that “yes,” that one little nod, I hadn’t sealed our fates.
It had happened once already. At least once. For both of us.
I didn’t know if we could survive it again.