32. Denver
Chapter 32
Denver
T he door to Ethan’s house opens, and my mouth drops open when I see his battered face. “Ethan, what—” He steps back, and I follow, my gaze halting on Ranger. He doesn’t look as hurt, but his nose is bleeding, and his shirt is peppered with red. I close the door behind me, my gaze darting between them. “What the fuck is going on?”
“Your fiancée paid me a visit,” Ethan says, and it’s then that I notice the gun.
Fuck. Did he say fiancée?
“He told you?—”
“Yes,” Ethan bites out.
I’d planned on telling him when I got here. I hoped it’d make it clear that there was no leaving for me. I wasn’t going to leave Ranger behind. I don’t think I could even if I wanted to, and I no longer want to.
Knowing I could have lost him to Wilder only solidified that I’ll stand by his side. I’ll be his. And he’ll be mine. And our life will be dysfunctional as fuck, but ours.
I’d called Ethan back to tell him that and make sure my confession was safe, too. But he had sounded so desperate over the phone, so scared, that I had no choice but to come here and prove to him in person that this was over.
Now I’m glad I did.
“What are you doing here, Ranger?” I ask.
“I could ask you the same thing, little bird,” he says, his expression telling me that I owe him an explanation, which I do, but it can wait until we’re alone. His dark gaze moves to Ethan. “There’s been someone working for the police. Someone they were fairly excited to use to bring me down.”
My brows pull together. “Who? No one knows—” My words halt, and I shift my attention to Ethan. He tenses his jaw, finally lowering the gun. “No.”
“Yes,” Ranger says. “He was fucking you for information.”
“That isn’t what I was doing!” Ethan shouts. “Denver, I owed Archer?—”
I hold up my hand, surprise rolling through me. “How the fuck do you know Archer Adler?”
Shame coats his expression. “He’s Sebastian’s brother.”
I resist leaning back against the door to keep my balance.
“Ethan owed Archer a favor, didn’t you, Ethan?” Ranger says. “I guess him covering for you killing your brother does hold a pretty high price tag.”
Ethan flinches, and my heart stalls. My fingers curl into my hands as I stare, words lost in my throat. Ethan locks his gaze on me, a mixture of apology and anger whirling in the darkness of his eyes.
“Ranger.” My voice is hoarse. “Go outside while I speak to Ethan.”
Ranger scoffs. “We’re killing him, Denver. This isn’t a situation fixed with a fucking apology.”
I keep my voice low. “You said you’d let me decide how we dealt with him.” From the corner of my eye, I see Ethan’s attention cut to me. “This is how I’m dealing with it.”
Ranger lifts his chin but doesn’t argue. He closes the space between us and kisses me softly. “Ten minutes, then I start cutting pieces off him.”
He slams the door closed as he leaves.
Ethan places the gun down and leans against a kitchen stool, wrapping an arm around his ribs. He hisses in pain and drops his head back.
“Tell me,” I say. He says nothing. “Your brother? Tell me, Ethan. Help me understand why you did this.”
He fixes his attention to the floor, eyes glassy. “I was sixteen. My brother, James, was twenty, and we’d been at a party. Drinking, doing drugs, just stupid shit kids do. He was driving us home, and I must have fallen asleep or passed out, I don’t know, but when I woke up, we were parked on a railroad crossing.” He pauses, his voice tight, and I hold my breath. “He was high. He didn’t know what he was doing. He… he kept asking if I could feel the light from the train…” His gaze became distant, lost in a painful memory. “The train was coming, and he was just… laughing. I tried to get him out of the car, but he said he was fine, that he’d be fine… The train hit the car. I could do nothing.” He looks at me. “I panicked. I ran. Sebastian was home, so I went to him and told him what happened. Archer wasn’t a detective by that point, but he was still a cop, so we told him. But I’d already been arrested for assault, drinking, possession… This could have fucked my entire life. I didn’t care. I said I’d tell the truth, but Archer said he wouldn’t let me be punished for an accident. So, he lied for me. Said I left the party with James but didn’t get in the car, that I walked to Sebastian’s and stayed with them.”
I can’t imagine what he must have gone through. Sixteen and feeling that crushing weight on him, of not being able to do a thing as his brother was killed before him.
“It’s why I drank. It’s why I eventually stopped. I got my life together, I went to college, I opened my practice… I tried to forget. Then Archer called me when I was with you and said he needed a favor.”
I watch him. “So you slept with me again to get closer to me.”
“No, it was after, it was—” He stands, grimacing. “They didn’t want you. They wanted him. He just asked me to listen for information, that’s all.”
“For a confession?”
He falters. “Yes.”
Blades of betrayal push into my heart. “So, it was all a lie?”
“No, it wasn’t. Denver, I love you.”
I shove him. “Don’t you fucking say that to me. That’s what you all say, isn’t it? ‘ I love you, Denver. I didn’t mean it, Denver. Please fucking forgive me, Denver!’” I step back, shaking my head. “You used me.”
“If I didn’t love you, I’d have told them what you told me.”
“Oh, thank you so much, Ethan,” I spit out. “Thank you for not sending me to prison for killing a man who was going to kill me!”
Ethan’s mouth opens and closes. “I’m sorry, I really am, but I didn’t have a choice. I owed Archer. And Ranger is a piece of shit. Do you think I’d care if he got locked up?”
“Are you really so naive, Ethan? Do you really think I wouldn’t have gone to jail, too? You think they’d let me off?”
He takes a step toward me, but I move back.
Anger burns through whatever care I have left. It becomes ashes in the wind, fragments of what could have been if so much had been different. “You’re never to call me again, Ethan. Don’t speak to me if you see me. Don’t look in my direction. Don’t even think about me.” My voice breaks, and I hate myself for it. Regret shines in Ethan’s eyes, a tear falling down his cheek as I tear him apart with words that make me bleed, too. “As far as I’m concerned, we never met.”
“Denver, I’ll never tell them what you said. I promise you. I meant every word about us leaving, about getting you out of this place. I fucked up, but I love you.” He picks up a brown envelope, holding it out to me. “They’ll get you out. You, Axel, and me, but you can go anywhere. I’ve agreed everything with them. Just tell them?—”
“I’m not telling them anything,” I say, and despite my anger, I can’t stop myself from approaching him. “Ethan, I knew you for ten days and did everything to protect you from Ranger and this world I forced you into. I’m still protecting you, I always will, despite—” I falter, wishing I could work my anger back up. “So in what world would I ever turn on Ranger? Do you even know me at all?”
Ethan’s eyes are a war of pain and frustration. I understand it. I do. From the outside looking in, I’d beg myself to get out. But I’m not on the outside, and unless you’re in my life, you’ll never understand it.
I swallow. “Goodbye, Ethan.”
My hand is on the door handle when he speaks again.
“I’m sorry for lying to you. I am,” he says. “But I’ll never be sorry for trying to save you.”
I keep my back to him. “I don’t need saving from Ranger.”
“Not from Ranger,” he says. “From yourself.”
Ranger is leaning against his car, his face a mess of blood, his shirt ruined.
“Get in my car,” I snap as I pass. When he doesn’t follow, I stop and turn slowly to face him. “Ranger Luxe, get in my fucking car. You are not driving like that.”
He glares before striding past me and getting into the passenger seat.
The yellow streetlights illuminate the car as we drive in silence. Ranger stares out the window, and I grip the steering wheel, imagining it’s his neck.
“What the fuck were you thinking?”
Ranger slowly turns his head to face me. “I was going to kill your boyfriend. I’m sorry if that offends you.”
“He isn’t my boyfriend,” I hiss.
“And yet you sneak out to see him in the night.”
“To make sure he wasn’t going to speak to the police!” I squeak. “And you can talk—you were sneaking out to see him, too!”
“To kill him.”
I hit his arm with every word. “You’re. An. Idiot. As. If. We. Haven’t. Been. Through. Enough. Tonight.”
“ Stop hitting me.”
I point at him. “This stops right now. Do you hear me? Ethan is not a threat. He isn’t going to do a damn thing. You stay away from him.”
“Why do you care so much?” His question stops my tirade, and I grip the steering wheel again. “Do you love him?”
“I—” My exhale is the loudest sound in the car. “I care about him. Do I have feelings for him? Yes. But if love is what we have…” I gesture between us. “Then no, I don’t love Ethan. I love you.”
He has the fucking audacity to smirk.
“Stop that!”
He shrugs. “I win.”
“You do not win . This is not winning .”
I almost jump when he rests his hand on my thigh and squeezes. “I’m marrying you. Believe me, this is winning.”