Chapter One
What was it with wedding speeches? Whatever happened to, ‘I’m nervous as hell? Doesn’t my bride look great? Thanks for coming.’
As if he could hear my thoughts, Daniel looked across and gave me one of his zillion-kilowatt smiles, followed by a discreet wink as the groom proceeded to launch into a speech worthy of the Pride of Britain awards.
My heart did its usual Olympic gold-winning, one and a half somersault dive sending a hot flush around my system. Six weeks. He’d been going out with Emily for six, sodding, interminable weeks now and I still had that stupid reaction around him.
I gave a tense, polite smile back. I could do this. Friends, we’re friends. Always have been and — I had to accept it once and for all — always will be.
As Emily’s hand crept around Daniel’s shoulders I focused back on Piers the groom and his rambling tale of finding true love in Neasden on a three-minute speed date organised by my cousin, trying to ensure that my face said completely-enraptured-by-this-story. I’d heard it many times before.
The room erupted with laughter. I’d missed the groom’s punchline. He was raising his glass to make the toast and then we were all on our feet.
Indecent or not, I left the table abandoning my half-eaten dessert and headed to the ladies before everyone else.
All the mirror told me was that my eyes were over-bright but that I still looked relatively normal.
Jealousy did funny things to you on the inside and I was convinced it might start showing any day now on the outside.
Unfortunately I couldn’t skulk in the loos for the rest of the reception so, tucking my clutch bag under my arm, I headed in search of much-needed liquid refreshment.
Of course I bumped straight into my mother who must have been staking out the bar waiting for me, as she knows there’s only so long I can go without a glass of wine.
She flicked a triumphant glance at my Auntie Brenda, who was looking vibrant in a fuchsia pink silk suit.
‘Olivia, isn’t it such a lovely story? Lucy meeting Piers on one of Barney’s speed-date evenings.’
‘Yes, Mum.’ And just because the bride and groom had met at a speed-date didn’t mean the rest of the world should try it.
Quite frankly, pulling out my own toenails with a pair of rusty pliers had more appeal.
Unfortunately Lucy’s success had given my other entrepreneurial cousin Barney a bright idea.
‘See, it can work.’ Her eyes twinkled, encouraging and pleading at the same time.
‘Yes and I’m sorry,’ I said, not feeling sorry at all. ‘It’s really not my thing. Anyone want a drink?’
‘You do know that Barney’s speed dates are for the discerning single,’ Auntie Brenda interrupted, her bright red curls clashing with her outfit as they bobbed with enthusiastic, maternal pride. ‘He doesn’t let just anyone in, you know. Invitation only.’
‘I know, Auntie Bren. Sounds wonderful,’ I lied. Wonderfully awful. ‘I’m sure Barney’s doing brilliantly, but—’
‘Olivia! You need to get back out there,’ my sister Kate butted in.
No. All I needed was a drink. And where had Kate popped up from? It wasn’t as if Mum needed reinforcements.
‘Honestly, Mum. She’s turned into a right bore. No sense of adventure.’
And going to live in a plush flat in Sydney’s Darling Harbour made her Ranulph Fiennes? A pioneering spirit she was not. Other people went off to Australia with a well-worn rucksack that had earned its Glastonbury stripes, not a set of matching luggage Victoria Beckham would envy.
‘That’s not kind, Kate,’ said Mum, determined as always to treat us fairly, before turning to me with that I’m-concerned-about-you expression on her face. It was becoming a permanent fixture.
So I’d lost a bit of weight I could ill afford to lose.
It had absolutely nothing to do with unrequited love — it was just a bit tricky eating sometimes.
I’d taken to hiding in my room with a good book whenever Daniel was around, which meant I skipped a few dinners.
Thankfully he was staying over a lot less now and I could top up at breakfast time.
‘It would be nice, though, if you helped your cousin.’ Mum was off again, like a seagull with a chip on the seafront. ‘We should support his business venture.’
‘The royal “we”?’ I asked with a flippancy I didn’t feel. In fact I felt a bit like that poor soggy chip — about to be gobbled up. I knew exactly where this was heading. ‘So you and Dad will be coming too?’
‘Don’t be silly now, dear.’
‘What about you?’ I turned to Kate with a limp grin. If I was going down, she could come too.
‘Sorry, hon, but I’ll be off back to Oz soon. Wouldn’t want to get their hopes up and then disappoint . . . besides, I’ve got a boyfriend.’
Ah yes, the perfect surf-stud stockbroker she’d met within a week of arriving in Australia.
From her description of him you could bet the two of them made a stunning couple on Bondi beach or wherever the beautiful people of Sydney go.
Kate is gorgeous and reminds me of one those pedigree Weimaraner dogs, all glossy and sleek.
Me? I’m more like a Golden Retriever: long legs, brown eyes and lots of blonde curls — although not quite so dopey.
‘It’s time you got back in the water,’ said Kate, her voice gentling with concern.
‘What?’ I said, determined that the smile on my face didn’t slip. Red herrings were called for and quick. ‘I’ve been in the water plenty, I just don’t like to get in too deep.’ Short and sweet suited me fine, although recently those had begun to pall.
‘Olivia! Don’t be like that. You really need to get over him.’
I gave her a startled glance. Surely Kate didn’t know that I was pining for Daniel?
I thought I’d done a rather fabulous job that day, keeping my feelings hidden, smiling a lot, laughing too loudly, avoiding looking in a certain direction.
Look folks, I’m having a fantastic time.
I’m not the least bit in love with Daniel.
Not the least bit bothered that Emily’s all over him.
‘Mike didn’t deserve you . . .’
Phew. She was barking up the wrong tree. Thank you, thank you. Mike was another, completely different mistake. You’d think I was piling them up. He was Jurassic period, definitely ancient history.
And then squinting over her shoulder, I spotted Daniel with Emily.
‘Why not try it?’ Kate finished.
Her face, drawn in earnest lines, made me want to hug her. She hadn’t a clue.
Like a shopaholic with the credit cards cut up, but unable to stay away from the shops, my eyes sneaked another peep beyond Kate. Emily’s hand was snaking up Daniel’s back, her fingers toying with the blond hair at the nape of his neck.
You’d think seeing them together all the time would have given me some kind of immunity by now, like building resistance against germs, but no, every time I saw the two of them together, I caught the cold all over again.
I needed to do something. Take positive action and stop being so pathetic and spineless.
I turned so that Kate’s head obscured the two of them. Alternative therapy. Medicine. That’s what I needed. It’d taste bloody awful but it might do the trick.
‘OK, I’ll give Barney’s speed date a try.’ I’m not sure who was more surprised by my calm acquiescence — me, Mum or Kate? Auntie Bren just smiled serenely.
That was it. Traffic light green for go.
Kate’s face lit up with a gleeful smile.
I smiled back, ignoring the spasm of panic that clutched at me.
I’d only said I’d go . . . I could always get out of it later.
I was brilliant at coming up with ideas, a creative thinker allegedly, according to those silly management profiles they do at work.
I could dream up a million excuses. Voluntary root canal work, knitting lessons, appendicitis — any one would do.
Unfortunately, I hadn’t taken account of the cunning Machiavellian strand lodged within Kate’s DNA.
* * *
Daniel felt Emily nestle in next to him. Soft, warm. Her cleavage on display, inviting. He put an arm round her and looked down at the white-blonde hair. No denying, she was gorgeous especially when she smiled sleepily up at him, her eyes hinting at sex. Sweet, uncomplicated and very feminine.
Looking around the room he saw the DJ methodically packing up his kit with the kind of fierce concentration that said, ‘I’m off duty and headed home’.
It was that time of night. Even the waitresses had been roused from their earlier resigned inertia and were whipping glasses off tables with super-heroic speed.
Across the table, Olivia and her sister had their heads together, tawny blonde and glossy brunette.
His eyes narrowed as he watched Olivia lift her half-full wine glass.
Her heart wasn’t in it. She’d been putting on a brave face all day.
He felt for her but it went with the territory.
This was what she’d signed up for. As she took another sip she looked up and caught him watching.
A tight-lipped smile flashed across her face.
Served her right and then he immediately regretted the thought. Unkind and unfair. No one deserved to be unhappy but Christ he wanted to shake her. Getting herself into such a mess.
He always thought he understood Olivia. Straight arrow.
Sensible, down to earth. He winced. Made her sound boring and she wasn’t.
How long was it that they’d known each other now?
Since the second term of the first year at university.
She was a fixture in so many of his memories.
The voice of reason on nights out when student antics threatened to go too far.
Calming things down in curry houses when the laddish behaviour overstepped the mark.
And yet she always achieved it with humour and authority without coming across like a Head Girl.
He could see where she got those traits. Her family all had that same natural ability to lead without appearing overbearing.
Shit, what would her parents say if they knew? With a marriage as solid as theirs, he felt sure they would be horrified if they heard their daughter was going out with a married man. He could barely believe it himself. He sighed and felt Emily wriggle as he tightened his arm around her.
He gave himself a mental shake. Nothing to do with him.
She was a grown woman and had made her bed.
Good job Emily had tipped him off that night at the party otherwise he’d have gone ahead and made a right dick of himself.
You thought you knew people. Just went to show you didn’t always know them as well as you thought.
Emily had sworn him to secrecy, making him promise not to tell Olivia he knew.
Something he regretted. Part of him wanted to remind her how awful it had been when his mother had an affair and the other part, the one that wanted to shake the living daylights out of her, couldn’t believe she could forget. It felt like a betrayal.
He shook his head trying to shake away the hollow feeling. Olivia had to really love this guy.
Daniel gritted his teeth at the memory of the near miss.
Emily’s hand fluttered along the length of his tense jaw and then down over his thigh.
He had a good idea where it was headed. Simple and uncomplicated, that’s what he wanted.
He certainly didn’t want to be sitting here dwelling on the past and wondering what the hell Olivia was playing at.
Emily’s hand moved up, her fingers sliding into the waistband of his trousers. He looked down to see the suggestive tilt of her eyebrow and her rosebud mouth pursed in invitation. He bent his head to kiss her. Olivia had made her bed, it was nothing to do with him.