Chapter 3
CHAPTER THREE
Randall
Well fuck me.
I had certainly been in a hell of a lot better situations than right now. I wanted to save this fucking asshole, and now I wanted to be the one to kill him.
Fuck him for doing this to me. And fuck my stupid dick for…liking it?
Judas Masters probably had more dicks in his mouth than fucking Mary at the Asylum, but I sure as fuck had never so much as looked at one.
This was humiliating, being forced to my knees, forced to look up at him like some doe-eyed schoolgirl. I wanted to vomit, and every time he hit my gag reflex, I did. The continuity of having to swallow my own puke when he thrusted harder in my mouth was my last straw.
He should be weaker than this.
His body had just been barely resuscitated by my stupid ass, not even an hour before this fucked up game of his.
It had to be the fucking demons in his head keeping him upright, much less overpowering me like this.
I let my eyes glide around the space, trying to find something-anything to use and free myself from his grip.
Fucking Judas Masters.
Much like all the other broody bastards with that last name, this fucker was a pain in my ass. Judas became my responsibility because, frankly, I didn’t think anyone knew what the fuck to do with him.
I was hired by Goliath, based on Quinn’s recommendation, to work at the Asylum. Among other reasons for contemplating my life choices, I accepted the position. Never did I dream it would lead to being face fucked in the goddamn ghetto from the man that was supposed to be dead already.
We’d played this game for a year now. He thought I didn’t see him, didn’t recognize the little details of his grubby handprints in my condo.
At first, I hadn’t. I thought I just wanted the asshole alive, that I was creating the illusion to make myself feel better about losing him. The fucked up Little Chip that no one bothered to understand.
Everyone wanted to change him, mold him, fix him. But Judas, despite every goddamn robot working on his brain, was not broken. He was smart as hell, and he knew himself and others more than even the greatest of narcissists.
I wanted to figure him out, to do what no one else had tried to do. I wanted to understand him. His mind was a mystery because of all the fucking depravity that resided in there.
He was insane.
That much was evident to anyone, but there were beautiful pieces inside his noggin that were akin to warped diamonds. I could see his pain, the raw hatred and self-loathing he lived with every day. He hadn’t wanted to kill that kid.
He didn’t want to kill anyone. His fractured mind allowed so many to use him to their own end. And every time they did, it took more and more pieces away from the man.
My Little Chip.
I didn’t allow myself to believe he was alive for so long.
Going about my life and abusing my body in the anger that I felt like my own mind was slipping.
I used my anger to rip my muscles, create a monster within myself to protect me from the real ones on the outside.
Despite being two hundred and ninety pounds of bulking mass, I was still so fucking weak.
“You look so beautifully broken, Liebling. Fucking hell. I have wanted my cock down your thick throat for so long. Fuck! Maybe I did die, because this, baby, is fucking heaven.”
I blinked the stupid tears from my eyes, anger growing with the viciousness of his thrusts. Maybe because I saved him from dying, now he wanted to punish me for it…punish me for making him live.
Could I really blame him when I don’t even want to be alive either?
I tried to speak, but he smacked my cheek with my gun, tsking and grunting, that stupid child song lulling my addled brain to an eerie calm. The harder I fought, the rougher he got with my aching throat. He loved hurting me, and fuck me if I didn’t…like it.
I gave up trying to figure out what the fuck was wrong with me long ago. Well before Judas fucking Masters got his tattooed mitts on my ass.
But this? This was too much.
I wasn’t attracted to men.
Fucking hell, I wasn’t attracted to anyone.
I didn’t need sex.
I needed to fucking breathe.
It was an annoying need to keep from exploding. But every cunt I took was just empty. I didn’t feel anything. If I even orgasmed at all, it was like a muted splash from a pond, opposed to the crashing waves others describe.
I was defective, a reject in even my basic functioning.
Judas may be fucking nuts, but my mind was just as fractured.
Losing my brother, Trevor, had done that to me.
It didn’t matter how long I tried to find him.
I knew he was gone. Killed. Probably overdosed and died in some ditch.
Forgotten. Just a fucking tag on a cold body, and thrown in a fire to burn to ash.
I was fucking burning. My body felt hot, a foreign sensation unless I was working out for hours. I chased this heat in how hard I hit my training.
Why was a fucking mental patient the one to bring it on now?
“You’re not coming in my goddamn mouth—” I grunted, trying to pull back from his dick enough to speak. “Kill me before I strangle you.”
He laughed, that eerie yet beautiful tone like a warped lullaby you can’t help but listen to.
“Mmm. Kinky, Baby.”
Gripping my face, he slammed forward so hard I saw stars. What I thought was pain before turned into a blazing fire that made my throat feel numb in its wake. He was truly fucking my damn face.
The gun dropped to the ground for him to get a better hold on my face, but there was no way of grabbing it. I didn’t know where it fell.
I couldn’t see anything but him.
I couldn’t see through the ever constant tears streaming down my face, and Judas’s blurry image lit with the moonlight shining through the broken window.
“I am done playing, Randy,” he warned, yanking my hair so tight it made my head throb more.
I didn’t know what he meant. Was he letting me go? Used and discarded?
“Though I love watching your cock grow from tasting me.”
I growled around him, knowing he was right. I’d leaked so much precome at this point that I looked like I’d pissed myself.
My pants were soaked, and the stickiness rubbed against my legs with his movements. I had never been this hard. Even when having actual sex with a woman, feeling their wet orgasms over and over.
Nothing was like this. I felt like a simple brush of fabric would be enough to make me come. A new fear took hold, and I felt my cheeks pale.
Please fucking don’t…
As if he read my mind, or maybe the pathetic desperation on my face, he moved his foot off my legs, getting a better grip on my head with both his feet stationed in front of me.
His foot pressed down on my cock, and I couldn’t deny the fucking sound coming out of my mouth.
Strangled. That’s what I was. Strangled, unable to fucking breathe from this madman. Those damning eyes glittered with newfound interest, and he pressed harder into my crotch.
“Oh, fuck…Stop that!”
He didn’t stop. He pressed even harder, forcing my erection to bend to my balls. God, this fucking killed me.
So why the fuck was I panting like a dog?
“Little Chip,” I warned, his dick pulling out of my throat enough for me to get a few rapid inhales of breath.
I had only been getting oxygen through my nose until now, and the feeling of actual air made my head swim.
The joy of getting a simple breath was short-lived when I felt Judas jerk my face up to his.
I felt like a fucking ragdoll and made a mental note to kill myself even more in the goddamn gym.
I couldn’t let myself be overpowered like this.
Fuck him.
Fuck me.
“Is that your baton, piggy, or do you just love the way I fuck your filthy mouth?”
I spit sticky saliva out of my mouth onto the floor, his precome leaving a thick coating on my tongue that hung out of my mouth like spider webs.
“Fuck you,” I said, falling onto the ground from the weakness in my knees. I was so shaken.
I couldn’t even get up, and Judas knew it.
Reveling in the fact that he didn’t have to manhandle me to make me his fucking bitch anymore.
I was too tired, my fight seeping out of me like mist into the floor below me.
I was as unsteady as the broken beams around us, tattered like the broken noose rope swinging above our heads. His words echoed from earlier.
Beautifully broken.
“Fuuuuck, Liebling. Get ready, my good fucking boy. Mmm. Enjoy the reward of your tight fucking throat working so damn hard.”
His come hit my mouth, the thick liquid sickeningly warm as it covered my face, stinging my already blurred vision, and replacing any form of dignity or authority I felt I had with him.
He was off fucking leash and flaunting it in the most degrading way possible. He left my throat so he could taint the entirety of my body. It was not enough to just come down my damn throat and ease the fucking burn. No, he had to break me fully.
Show me I was not his boss. Hell, I wasn’t even his equal.
He did this to prove I was beneath him.
And the worst fucking part of all of this was the fact that I wasn’t just covered in his come.
I was soaked…in my own.