53
S hadow to light. Everything’s muddled, like I’m swimming through the swamp to break the surface of the ocean.
But as disoriented as I am, there’s warmth on my legs. Sunlight. A thin blanket tucked over my body.
Exhaustion settles over me. The faraway beeps of machines sound in my ears, and there’s a strange tightness across my chest. I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. Or a very, very hard fist.
Blinking, I roll my head across the pillow. A happy glow unfurls in my chest at the sight of Charlie. My cowboy has the corner chair pulled up to the edge of my bed, his boots propped up on the metal footboard. A too-small blanket is draped over him.
“Charlie.” I whisper, raspy. The words stick in my dry throat, but somehow, he hears me and stirs.
And then explodes out of his chair so fast he rocks my hospital bed.
“Ruby,” he says hoarsely. Wild and haunted blue eyes meet mine, but he doesn’t come to me like I ache for him to do.
He stands there, breathing hard, chest heaving. He keeps his gaze on me, and there’s so much weight in it. So much fear, pain, and desperation, I feel it all.
And I remember.
Everything.
The fire, Winslow, adrenaline, pain, rain falling from the sky.
My mother.
Dying with Charlie’s name on my lips.
I died.
I press my shaky hand against my chest. My heart rate is normal—my normal.
I’m alive.
I lived.
I stare at Charlie. Sadness surrounds him.
That same sadness I sensed back at the ranch all those lifetimes ago.
So unlike the man I know now, the brooding rancher I first met in that bar.
His eyes are tortured, his beard unkempt, his muscles tense.
A man unhinged. It looks like he hasn’t slept in days.
With tubes and wires wrapped around my wrist, I extend a trembling hand, like I’m coaxing a bear forward.
He flinches.
“Charlie?” I say quietly, worried. “Come here, Cowboy.”
His eyes flare at my words, and then his face cracks, shatters into a thousand emotions I can’t name. With a wild roar, he’s storming toward me, towering over my hospital bed.
He sits himself at the edge of my bed, near my hips, and gently gathers me into his huge body. His arms surround me like the home they’ve always been.
“You came back to me,” he mutters desperately. His deep, rumbling voice is like heaven to my ears. “Ruby. Thank God, thank God. You’re alive.” He kisses my cheek, my throat, locking us together tight, like we’re tethered by our hearts.
The relief in his eyes, his frantic touch, shatters my control.
I burst into tears.
“Yes,” I whisper. I weep against his warm, solid chest, gripping his shaking shoulders. Grateful to be with him, to be alive.
The sound that leaves Charlie is a sob. “I love you,” he says raggedly against my ear. “I fucking love you, Sunflower.”
With those words, he kisses me. Soft, slow. I relish the sensation of his coarse beard against my lips. He holds my wrist in his fingers and my heart breaks. He’s not okay.
“Feel,” I whisper against his lips. “Feel me. I’m okay, Cowboy. I’m alive.”
A shudder wrenches his body. “Ruby,” he rasps, burying his face in my hair and hanging on for dear life. For a long time, he doesn’t let me go. He holds me, making sure I’m here, alive and in his arms.
When we pull away, Charlie gently lowers me back onto my pillow. The bed creaks as he hits the remote to bring it to a sitting position.
“Do you remember what happened?” he asks. He keeps his eyes on me, dark with concern.
“I died,” I whisper.
His face almost shatters. His breath is a harsh exhale. “Ruby.”
My eyes widen. “The horses—”
“Are fine.” He clasps my wrist, his fingers tracking my pulse. “All of them, baby. They’re safe. We saved them all.”
I smile weakly, relieved. “Superheroes.”
Charlie kisses my knuckles. “They’re safe because of you. Because of what you did.”
“How long have I been here?” I glance at the heart monitor, pumping out a steady rhythm.
“Nine days.”
I gasp.
His Adam’s apple bobs. “I’ve been out of my mind, waiting for you to wake up.”
And then I gasp again.
Because that’s when I see them.
Flowers.
Everywhere.
Vases and vases of bold color and bright blooms and vines and trembling petals. Asters and hydrangeas and peonies. Any free space is covered with flowers. And the best sight—sunflowers. My sunflowers from Charlie’s cabin have been brought here.
It’s like waking up and seeing my heart up in the sky.
“Charlie,” I breathe, my voice uneven. “You did this?”
“I said you’d always have sunflower days,” he grates, reaching out to cup my cheek.
His words have me in a chokehold. Honest, gruff, and pure. Mine . Sheer joy sweeps over me and I reach for him, but the motion has me yelping in pain.
“Careful,” he growls, stopping me immediately with loving hands on my shoulders. “Enough, baby.” He tucks me against a fluffy pillow.
I press a hand against my side, feeling the scratch of a bandage, and lean my head back. Exhale through the pain. “It hurts.”
Charlie’s jaw clenches. Gaze haunted, he says, “I broke your rib.”
Realization dawns. I freeze, forgetting how to breathe. My eyes get as big as saucers as I look up at him. “You saved me,” I whisper.
His eyes flare at my words, a hard breath shuddering out of him. “You took me down, Sunflower. Hell, I was gonna follow you if I couldn’t bring you back to me.”
I shake my head, the thought too terrible to contemplate. “Don’t say that, Charlie.”
“It’s true,” he says, gruffly.
I cover my mouth, unable to speak. Stunned by what he’s done. How is it this man has never given up on me? How is it he can claim my heart like it’s the first time over and over again? A rush of emotion has fresh tears hitting my eyes.
“Kiss me, Cowboy.”
He does, soft and slow. His rough hand slides up to curve around my throat. At his touch, my heart rate speeds up, and the monitors beep wildly.
He breaks the kiss and freezes.
“It’s okay, Charlie.” I murmur, my lips sweeping over his beard. “Again. Kiss me again.”
With a heated gaze, he cups my face in his hands. His tongue slides against mine, my core warming with sunshine, his calloused thumbs skimming the pulse in my throat.
“I love you, Ruby,” he says when he pulls back. Visibly overcome, he presses my hand over his heart, and his piercing blue eyes stare into mine. “From this heartbeat until the last, I am yours.”
The seriousness on his handsome face has me losing it all over again. I sniffle and bring my hands to my face. Charlie gathers me in his arms.
We sit here in the quiet. The kind of quiet that speaks volumes. I can hear it in the rumble of Charlie’s breath. Feel it in the curve of his kiss. Our fears. Our pasts. Our future.
And then I start to cry again, but I smile through my tears, because I know what we have, and I know what we are.
Lucky.
The luckiest hearts alive.