Chapter 31
Quinn
Graham pulled away, speaking low to Roman. He was tense and stiff, the fear stark on his face. My own heart clenched.
But then he let out a breath.
“A flat tire?” He shook his head. “Yeah, I can get that to you.”
He hung up and looked at me. “Roman brought Mom and Dad out for dinner and they got a flat on the way home and his jack broke. He needs me to bring him another one.”
I also breathed a sigh of relief. “Okay.”
My head was still spinning. Not just from the nerves, but from the kiss. And Graham’s confession. How was I supposed to process that? Graham grabbed my hand.
“Come on, it shouldn’t take us long.”
I paused, resisting him.
He gave me a confused look.
“If it’s not going to take you long, how about I stay here? You can come get me on your way back.”
He blinked at me. “You want to stay at the library?”
I nodded, cautiously. I hadn’t wanted to be separated from him earlier, but a breather from him would be nice.
To get my head back on straight after…after what had happened right here.
My back was slightly sore from being pressed up against the shelves.
My lips were tingling and swollen. And his confession—you’re everything I didn’t know I needed—reverberated through my mind.
I wanted a minute to make sense of it without the distraction of him. I had to sort through all the emotions roaring through me to figure out how I felt.
His hand tightened around mine. “Are you sure?” He obviously didn’t want to leave me.
“Yes, I’m sure.” I nodded again. “You won’t be long, and Mara is here.”
He stared at me, searching my face. Eventually, he must have decided that it would be safe enough.
He jerked his chin down in something resembling a reluctant nod. “Fine. Stay here. Don’t leave. I’ll let Mara know you’re back here, and I’ll return shortly. I’ll have her lock the doors.”
He leaned in, and my heart leapt as he pressed his lips to my forehead. My body was still heated from our kiss. A kiss I would never forget.
“I’ll be right back,” he whispered, and then let go of my hand.
Then he was gone.
I almost collapsed into one of the chairs at the table. I was suddenly unable to breathe again as I thought about Graham and his lips, his hands, the feel of his body against mine and the way he wanted me.
Did I want him the same way?
I shook my head, chiding myself as I dropped my face into my hands. Of course I did. I could not lie to myself anymore. I wanted Graham. I didn’t want to give up how it felt when he touched me—the way he made me feel like something more than I was.
I jumped as something soft brushed against my hands. Straightening, I met a pair of wide, amber eyes. Her midnight-black fur gleamed as Calliope rubbed her face on my arm.
I stiffened. I’d barely seen the cat since my first day here when she had assaulted me with a book. Maybe she’d known to stay away from me after that. I wasn’t much for forgiveness.
She continued to slow blink at me, intermittently rubbing her soft fur against my skin. Maybe that wasn’t true anymore. Perhaps I’d grown a little bit softer.
With caution, I reached for her, tentatively scratching her behind the ears. She purred with pleasure.
“Do you have any idea what you have done?” I whispered to the cat, feeling a little foolish for speaking to an animal. “If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have met him.”
Suddenly, I was fighting tears. “I would’ve met him on the stand and wouldn’t have thought twice about him.”
There was something about that first moment we shared in the library. Something about how he’d tried to help me, but didn’t force himself on me. He was patient, and maybe a little entertained by my stubbornness.
I had thought I’d hated him, but it was only because he made me feel again.
Tears started to slide down my face as I continued to stroke the stupid cat. The stupid, lovely, fateful cat.
“I didn’t want this,” I muttered to her. “I never wanted to—” I cut myself off, the words on the tip of my tongue.
Fall in love.
I wasn’t in love with Graham. I couldn’t be.
My hand dropped from Calliope, and she blinked at me again, like she knew everything I wasn’t saying.
I wiped my face just as Mara appeared around the edge of the stacks, holding a paper cup.
“There’s still some hot chocolate left from the meeting tonight,” she said gently, her voice soft. “Thought you might want something warm while you wait.”
I didn’t want it. My stomach still felt twisted and tight.
But something warm sounded…nice. Something grounding to hold between my hands.
“Thanks,” I murmured, taking the cup.
It didn’t smell anything like Raleigh’s—no fresh cream or deep, rich chocolate. It was darker and thin. When I took a sip, it was way too sweet, but it almost had a bitter quality underneath. It wasn’t exactly pleasant, but it spread warmth through my cold limbs.
Mara slid into the chair across from me, petting Calliope absently while her focus remained on me.
The silence stretched for a long time. Minutes passed by, and I sipped my drink, mind whirring with everything I couldn’t say out loud.
I didn’t try to fill it as Mara remained. I didn’t mean to ignore her, but I didn’t have the capacity to engage with her.
My hot chocolate was almost gone when she finally spoke, pulling me from my thoughts.
“Is everything okay?” Mara asked.
I held a mouthful of lukewarm liquid before swallowing it. “Yes.”
“I hope you’re not upset with Graham,” she continued, watching me take yet another gulp so I didn’t have to answer right away.
“Why would I be mad at him?” The question genuinely confused me.
Mara hummed. “Well, because you’re not very nice, are you?”
I almost choked on my last mouthful of hot chocolate. I coughed into my elbow, eyes watering. “Excuse me?” I was almost convinced I’d heard her wrong.
Calliope butted her head against Mara’s arm, and she stroked the cat with stiff, almost mechanical movements.
Maybe I’d been imagining it, the way her stare seemed to harden when she looked at me. I was feeling a bit off, anyway. My limbs felt oddly heavy, but I was probably just tired. I was crashing from all the adrenaline and emotion. Everything was catching up with me all at once.
“You know,” Mara continued, ignoring me, “when you first showed up, I didn’t expect you to stay.”
I blinked slowly. “What?”
She kept petting the cat. “I never thought Graham would entertain you like he did.”
A tiny thread of unease pulled tight in my stomach. If the sudden exhaustion wasn’t hitting me so hard, I might’ve paid more attention.
I rubbed at my forehead. The room felt…fuzzy.
“Mara…what are you talking about?”
She leaned forward, her lips twisting into something between a smile and a sneer. “Graham has never looked at a girl the way he looks at you.”
There was simmering rage in her tone.
“What…are you talking about?” I slurred, my tongue suddenly thick and clumsy.
“I see everything that happens in this library.” Her eyes sharpened. “Everything. This place was always Graham’s space. His sanctuary.”
Her jaw clenched tight enough that a muscle jumped in her cheek. “I was his sanctuary.”
My heart lurched, a sluggish, panicked thud.
My body wasn’t responding properly. I tried to sit up straighter and only managed to sway.
“And then”—her voice cracked and something unhinged flashed across her face—“and then you came along and ruined everything. You aren’t good for him. I thought he’d see that himself, but he seems to need my help.”
My pulse stuttered.
“Mara…” My vision swam. “What…did you…do?”
She glared at me like she could burn holes through my skin.
“He used to sit with me, Quinn. He used to talk to me. But ever since you got here…he’s been distracted.”
The chair under me tilted.
Or maybe I did.
My empty cup slipped from my fingers, but I barely registered it.
I tried to stand, but my legs gave out instantly.
I caught myself on the edge of the table, but my arms shook violently.
“Mara…” My voice was a broken whisper. “S-Something’s wrong…”
She stood.
“Oh, Quinn.” She tilted her head, almost pitying. “You should’ve stayed in Cincinnati.”
My knees buckled.
Her face blurred.
The last thing I felt was the pressure of her hand against my back—and everything went dark.