20. Adriana
20
ADRIANA
Dimitri is standing behind me, the dresser in front of me, the mirror showing me all of my naked self.
He’s fucking me, and I cling onto the wooden edge of the dresser as I half sob with the intensity of it. I’m already swollen and aching because he made me come with his mouth before he pushed me over the dresser and started fucking me from behind.
He reaches around my front and pinches my clit, and I’m going to come any minute.
“Eyes,” he orders, and I look at him in the mirror.
His gaze holds mine and it’s hard, focused, obsessed. He never breaks eye contact as with a wail, I come.
I press back into his cock and forward into his palm, and I don’t know which I need more.
He swears and comes too. He fills me with spurt after spurt, our gazes never breaking for even a moment.
As the waves of ecstasy lull to a calm, he pulls out of me, spins me around, sits me on the dresser, and kisses me hard. His hand is in my hair, and I reach around him, tangling my arms around his neck.
This is the third day we’ve been doing this. Three full days since he took my virginity, and we can’t seem to stop. This crazy, obsessed, insane thing we’re doing.
I need to talk to someone because I don’t know if this is normal. I get that when you first have sex with someone you like you want it a lot, but every waking moment? More than you want food, or water, or even damn air in your lungs?
I need Dimitri like I’m going to die without him touching me.
He seems to feel the same because he can’t keep his hands or eyes off me.
This particular round of fucking started when he was in the middle of a meeting with his men on deck, planning the party. I walked past him wearing one of the new dresses that was delivered by a woman named Janice. It wasn’t even a sexy dress, just a simple linen sheath. His gaze followed me, and then he called the meeting to a close, picked me up in front of everyone, and carried me in here.
His fingers dip between my folds, and he pushes some of his cum that’s leaked out back inside me.
He bends his head and sucks on a nipple. I moan and pull him closer. I love him sucking on my breasts.
He lets go with a wet pop, then lifts me from the dresser and moves me to the bed.
“What time is the party starting?” I ask.
I’m dreading it. Not because I’m scared of sitting on his knee anymore, but because I’m scared people will think I’m just his whore. The paid for girl he stole from Dorian and kept as his own.
“Am I your whore?” I ask.
He breaks off tracing a pattern over my hip as we lie on our sides facing one another.
“What the fuck kind of question is that?” His features tighten.
“A genuine one. Dorian paid for me, and I’m here as your trophy. Tomorrow, you’ll sit me on your knee and show me off as the spoils of your war. That’s a whore.”
“No,” he says. “It’s not. I took you from my enemies, and now I’m preparing to fight a war for you. That makes you Helen of fucking Troy, not a whore.”
“The most beautiful woman in the world,” I say softly.
“You are.”
“I’m not.”
“You fucking are.”
He doesn’t clarify it with a to me statement.
“You haven’t been reading the books.” The change of topic has me pausing to catch up. “Don’t you like them?”
“They’re mostly crime thrillers and no, I don’t read them usually.”
“What do you read?”
“Literature. Often classical, but also newer literature. And … romance.”
“Like Hallmark movies?”
“Um, no. More like Fifty Shades of Grey .”
“Really?” His face lights up with interest. “You like kinky shit?”
“I mean, on the page, yes. I haven't tried it in real life.”
His hands skim down from my hip, and he gently parts my lips and plays with my pussy.
“What sort of stuff turns you on?”
“Lots of things. Specifically women being held down. Men being forceful.”
“You like primal play?”
“What’s that?”
“It would be stuff like me chasing you. You running. When I catch you, I force you to the ground; you might fight a bit. I hold you down.”
The moan that forces its way out of my mouth has my cheeks burning.
“Yeah, you like primal, huh? This pussy likes it, getting all wet anew for me.” He slides two fingers inside me and pulls them out, staring at them. “You’re so fucking wet for me, aren’t you?”
“Yes,” I whisper.
His hand slides over my ass, and he strokes his fingers, all wet and shiny, over my secret place.
I stiffen.
“Never had anyone in this hole?” he asks.
His words are coarse, but they don’t offend me; they turn me on.
“No. Not sure I want to.”
“I want to,” he says. “One day, when you’re ready, I want to fuck this virgin ass. The way I fucked your virgin pussy.”
He presses there, and when one finger breaches my entrance, I gasp.
His cock is hard, and he pushes out a stream of pre-cum. I stare at it greedily, wanting to taste it. “I want to fuck your wet pussy while I finger your ass.”
I nod and swallow, unable to speak.
He lies down and pulls me over him. “Sit on my cock, baby, and work yourself on it.”
I do as he says, and as his cock fills me, he adds a second finger.
“Oh,” I gasp.
“Play with your clit,” he orders.
I bring one hand around to my front, and for the first time, I finger my clit in front of him. His gaze is locked on my pussy, watching me avidly.
“Flick that clit,” he says. “Do it the way you do alone, in bed, when there’s no one watching.”
I close my eyes, and for once he lets me hide. I flick my clit side to side how I like it.
“Fuck,” he moans.
I grind down on him, and my tempo increases as desperation takes over. He thrusts his fingers in and out of my ass, moving them harder, and I feel the orgasm rising. It’s different to when I come normally; it feels like it’s skittering around my body. In my clit one minute. My pussy the next. Then my ass.
I fall, and it’s too much. His fingers in my ass pump me fast, and it feels like I’m coming there too. It’s so intense that tears fall from my eyes, rolling down my cheeks as I try to ride out the single most powerful sexual moment of my entire life.
Once I’m done coming, he slides his fingers from me and grasps my hips. He controls my speed, working me on his cock the way he wants. The way he needs.
“You. Are. Mine.” His words are growled. “No one else’s. Mine.”
I nod, still leaking tears from my eyes.
“Say it,” he demands.
“I’m yours,” I sob.
And I am. I’m his, and I do think he’s mine.
In that moment as he comes underneath me, I see a future for us. Me, him, and Cade.
I realize the tears are ones of happiness too.
A while later, as we’re snuggled up, me on top of him, I speak. “Did you mean it?”
“Mean what?”
“Am I yours?”
“Yes.”
“Are you … will this carry on? After, I mean.”
“Yes.”
Oh, God. This is huge. My heart spasms with joy. “Can we go fetch Cade, once it’s safe?”
He stiffens under me. “Adriana, you can’t be saddling yourself with a kid at your age when he isn’t even yours. You’re too young. To sacrifice yourself for a child you’ve only known a few months.”
His words are horrible. Cold even. It reminds me I don’t really know him. This is a crazy, lust-filled, adrenaline fueled situation, and he’s not a man I’ve slowly gotten to know. I hold his gaze and make sure he understands how serious I am when I reply. “I want to look after him. It’s not saddling myself. He can’t stay there, Dimitri.”
“That’s what the authorities are for.”
I sit up fast and hard. Staring at him, I shake my head. “What did you just say?”
He sighs. “I get that you want to protect him. But you’re not the best bet for him.”
“Dimitri, if you think there’s going to be anything between us moving forward, you better shut up right now.”
He narrows his eyes. “Do you know how many people I’d let speak to me that way?”
“No. I don’t care either. Cade is important to me.” I’m shaking. With rage. With fear. With hurt because he’s so callous in this moment after being so passionate before.
“He wouldn’t be safe here,” he says. “In our world.”
“Bullshit. Your sister is. We’d both be safe under your protection.”
“Let me get this straight. You want to skip straight past dating and move to us being a nuclear family.” His face is so tense there’s a vein throbbing in his temple.
“No. I mean, well, no.”
“It sure sounds like it.”
“So what are you saying? After this is over, and the danger is gone, we date ?”
He laughs. “I don’t date.”
“So, I’m just going to be your fuck buddy? The whore I said I was at the start? Will you put me up in a nice apartment and visit once a week?”
“You have a fucking smart mouth for someone who looks so angelic,” he snarls. “And no, you’re not living in an apartment. You’re living with me.”
“Not without Cade, asshole,” I practically scream.
I throw myself off the bed and hastily toss some clothes on. I should shower, but I can’t bring myself to care. I need to be away from him for a while. I get that we haven’t started a relationship in any normal way. I understand that me asking him if I can bring a kid to stay with us is a lot, but what option do I have? If Dimitri says he wants me to stay with him, then he needs to realize that I need to have Cade safe. Not in the care system, and not left with his mother who sold me to the damn mob.
He won’t even let me use the phone, and I can’t tell him that I called Cade’s grandparents because that will drop Nataliya in the shit, and I don’t wish to do that to her. If I can find a phone, I could maybe try, but it’s a stupid and dangerous idea because if they’re already with Hana, she might realize it’s me.
I need some time alone, away from the head fuck that is Dimitri, so I can think.
“Where the fuck are you going?” He practically snarls the words.
“Anywhere away from you.”
He starts to get up.
“Seriously, Dimitri. Give me some space.”
As if realizing I’m really fuming, he falters. “Listen, Adriana, some of that came out wrong. But you’re not thinking straight. You’re not old enough to shackle yourself to raising a kid full time when he isn’t yours. Hell, you’re only just legal to drink. And I’d make a terrible father. I can never be a father.”
“Why not?”
He shakes his head.
“Why fucking not ?” I scream, anger blinding me to my behavior.
“Because my own father tried to end my life.”
The words hang in the air and I can’t speak, all the saliva in my mouth turning dry at this bombshell he’s dropped.
“My mother too. He hated us and ultimately killed himself rather than raise me. He left a note. He never wanted me because I’m wrong somehow; those were his words. He saw it and tried to kill me and my mother. His genes are my genes; do you understand? I might be dangerous to a child, the way he was. I can never put some poor kid through that. I won’t do it.”
I stare at him. Horror washes over me at his words. Pity for what he’s been through but also incredulousness at the take he has on this. He’s getting me all wrong, thinking I’m demanding more from him than I am, but it also breaks my heart that he seems to believe he’s somehow faulty due to his father’s actions.
“Dimitri, you’re not him, and I don’t think you’d be like that. You’re the strongest man I know.”
“No.” He shakes his head. “I’m angry, vengeful, possessive.” His eyes darken as he looks at me. “That doesn’t make me strong. It makes me dangerous.”
“I don’t believe it for a second, but I’m not asking you to be his father, Dimitri. You said you’d keep me safe, and I’m just asking for you to do the same with Cade; that’s all. You don’t have to help raise him or be his daddy in any way. All I’m saying is that if you want me, I come as a package with him.”
“How does that work?” He shakes his head. “You’re not thinking straight, Adriana. You can’t simply take him. Social services would come for him. You could go to prison.”
“You said your father is in with the cops, right? I have seen where you all live. I imagine you have immense wealth and connections to afford that kind of real estate. I bet you could help me. He’s a cute kid; you’d like him.”
“It has nothing to do with whether I’d like him or not, but the fact I don’t want to start a relationship with someone who wants to bring a kid into it.”
“So you were just going to expect your future wife to never have kids?”
“Lots of women these days don’t particularly want kids, and I never expected to get married anyway.”
“You don’t want marriage either?” This just gets worse. One day, not now, but one day, I most definitely do.
“I said I didn’t . That was back when I didn’t know you existed in the world.”
His words are romantic and sad, but they won’t work because they’re fucked up.
“You want to marry me?” I almost scoff at the level of insanity in this conversation. “But expect me not to have kids ever?”
“I don’t know what I want. To devour you. Own you. Keep you.”
My heart sinks. “Those things aren’t love, Dimitri. They are ownership.”
He watches me, a muscle ticking in his cheek, but he doesn’t speak. Doesn’t correct me.
I turn on my heel and storm across the room.
“Where the fuck are you going?” he shouts.
“Anywhere on this goddamn yacht where you aren’t. Unless that’s forbidden too?”
He shakes his head and blows out a long, exasperated breath, but he doesn’t stop me.
I’m such a fool, and I’m as angry at myself as I am with him.
I storm down the corridor but decide I can’t face his men. I don’t want to be on the deck, where they all mill around being all macho and noisy.
The library room is too small and makes me feel claustrophobic. My stomach rumbles, and I realize I haven’t eaten in many hours. I can’t face anything much. This entire conversation has left me reeling. I need something for my blood sugar, though, so I head down below to the kitchen. I sneak in there some days and chat with the staff while I raid the fridge. They don’t seem to mind.
This time, the place is empty. I putter around the room and stick my head in the fridge, then take out some chocolate mousse. I place it on the counter and open a cabinet drawer, hunting for a spoon, when I see it.
A phone.
Holy moly, what the hell?
Sitting on the work surface, unattended is a phone. Not even stopping to think how crazy this is, I grab it and the mousse before racing to the library. I don’t like the room, but no one goes in there.
Once inside, I pull out the phone. Fuck, it’s locked. There’s a picture on the screen. A pretty blonde. It’s Jamie’s phone. I’ve talked to her lots. Touch ID fails, of course, but then the pin option pops up. I know her date of birth because her birthday is next week, and she was telling me about her plans for hitting twenty-one. Heart in my throat, I enter her date of birth.
Too easy, I think, as I enter the final digit, but it seems for once the gods are smiling down on me.
I almost yell in triumph as the pass code unlocks the device.
Holy shit.
Hands shaking, I dial the only number other than my father’s and Cade’s grandparents that I know by heart and press the video call button.
Sian answers immediately, her pretty face lighting up the screen.
“Babe, what the hell? What’s happening? Where are you? Your father called, and he was so worried. He’s beside himself. He says you’ve left. Just done a runner. He hoped you’d be here.”
I start to cry, sobbing so hard I can’t speak.
It’s all too much. Being taken and the trauma of it followed by the heady high of Dimitri and me finding one another, followed by the crash as I’ve realized he’s way more messed up than I allowed, is too much .
“Oh my God. Adriana. Babe, can you at least tell me where you are?”
“No,” I say. “I’m okay. I’m safe. You can’t tell my father I spoke with you.”
“Why not?”
“I can’t trust him.” I sob again but get myself under control.
She has tears in her eyes now. “You’re scaring me, babe. Please, let me help. How can I help? What’s happening?”
“Hana, it’s Hana… She’s done something bad. Some men took me and put me on a boat.”
“Oh my fucking God. Why can’t I know where you are? Please, Adriana,” she says as she cries in earnest.
“No.” I swallow and sniff, getting myself under control. “No. Listen to me, I am safe now. Some other men came, to the boat I mean, and they got rid of the ones who took me. They are protecting me while they find out who is behind this.”
“Then what?” Her eyes are wide, and her breathing is rapid. “You can’t stay on a boat as a captive. Adriana, if you don’t tell me where you are I will call the police.. They’ll get you safe and then we can bring you here, on the jet.”
“No,” I almost yell. “They can’t. This goes way deeper than that. I have to do what these men say for now.”
I’m starting to regret calling her.
“As I said, then what?” Her tears have dried, and she looks angry. Not at me, I know that much, but she’s probably angry at the situation I’m in. “Let me tell Daddy. He can help. He’s richer than the King,”
“No, they’ll let me go; I know it. They are having a party tomorrow night. After that we’re moving from the yacht, and once the men who took me are caught, they’ll let me go,” I sigh and know she’s going to judge me in the worst way, but I’ll burst if I don’t tell anyone. “I think… Sian, this is going to sound like the craziest, most fucked-up thing I’ve ever said, but I think I’m falling for one of my captors.”
“Whaaaat?” Her eyes goggle at me as she stares in disbelief. “No. Adriana, you aren’t. It’s Stockholm Syndrome. You need to get out of there.”
“I am. I’m sure I am. Except, he said he wouldn’t look after Cade. Cade needs caring for. He needs to be out of that house.”
Sian shakes her head. “Adriana, listen to me. You’re not making sense. You want your captor to adopt your stepbrother? Hon, you’re not okay. Oh God, I’m so scared for you.”
“How do you know if it’s real?” I ask. “Is, like, wanting someone every minute of the day real?”
“You don’t want him— you’re fucking traumatized and messed up.” Her voice has risen to a screech.
Sian is my best friend in the whole world, and right now, she’s looking at me as if I’ve lost my damn mind. Maybe I have.
The door behind her opens. Her shouting has alerted her father. Barnaby is a friend too. A handsome, older man who has a kind face and loves his daughter to bits, he’s always treated me like a member of their family. The very first weekend Sian invited me to stay, Barnaby welcomed me with open arms. Right now, however, I don’t want to see his face because I don’t want him to be involved. He’s rich and powerful in his own way, and I can’t have him trying to get involved in this and maybe making it all so much worse.
This is too embarrassing, him seeing me like this. Crying, Broken. He’s my best friend’s dad, and I’m mortified.
“Sian,” I say, anger rising in me. “Can we have some privacy?”
“Adriana?” Barnaby peers on the screen, and his face recoils as if I’ve slapped him. “Good Lord, my darling girl, whatever is the matter?”
“She’s been kidnapped, Daddy. They are keeping her on some boat, but she says it’s okay because some other guys have saved her, but she’s still being held on the boat, so clearly it’s not okay.” Her words are rushed and don’t quite make sense.
“I’m hanging up,” I say, ice in my voice. “This is the last time I'll ever trust you, Sian.” If Barnaby tries to save me, and it goes wrong, he will endanger Cade.
“No, wait,” Barnaby reaches toward the screen as if he can pluck me from it and make me safe, but I hang up. The screen goes blank, and I stare at it for a long while. My fingers are shaking, and I think I’m going to be sick.
I wipe my eyes on the sleeve of my top, not caring if it’s gross.
Shit, I need to get this phone back to its rightful owner. I pocket it and sneak down to the kitchen. There are more people there now, and they’re searching for something. God, why did I do such a stupid thing?
“What are you looking for?” I ask casually.
“Jamie has lost her phone,” one of the guys says.
I drop to my knees and pretend to help search. I take the phone out of my pocket in a far corner, and then reach under the low shelf of a food rack. “Is this it?” I wave the phone in the air.
“Oh my God. Thank you. Yes. Thank God. We were told not to leave our phones unattended. I would have gotten in so much trouble.”
I bet they were. So that I couldn’t use them. Dimitri and his controlling ways.
I hand her the phone while rage consumes me.
Everyone is telling me what I feel, what I should do. Sian is saying I can’t like Dimitri. Dimitri is saying I can’t truly want to look after Cade.
Not one of them has given me the respect of listening to me. What I want. What I need.
I decide that for the next few days, I’ll avoid Dimitri, and when the party is finished, and we leave this yacht for his house, I’ll find a way to escape.