19. Tavia
Chapter 19
Tavia
C yan fell unconscious with his fangs still in my wrist. Thorne and Desmond called it a “deep healing sleep” and said it was normal after a vampire sustained a bad injury.
The two vampires pried Cyan’s fangs from my wrist, then eased his limp body to the bed. I was staring so hard at his unconscious face that I didn’t notice Thorne had pressed a strip of gauze to my wrist until he spoke.
“Hold that there. The bleeding will slow soon.” The clan leader quirked a brow. “Unless you want one of us to lick your wounds closed, but Cy probably won’t like another vampire’s scent on you when he wakes up.”
He wouldn’t care, I wanted to say, but the bitter statement remained stuck in my throat. It would feel too real if I said it aloud, even though Cy already said he would release me to someone else. I wasn’t ready to give up, and deep down I knew he wasn’t either.
And anyway, it wasn’t like I wanted another vampire licking my skin.
“I’m okay, thanks.” Thorne held out a length of tape, and I allowed him to wrap it around my wrist to hold the gauze in place. “What happens now? Will he be okay?”
Thorne stood, looking weary. “He’s already healing. Your blood will speed things along. He just needs to rest. As do you.” The vampire gave me a pointed look. “That was a lot of blood you gave, especially for your first feeding. Drink Gatorade or whatever you humans need to replenish yourself.”
“I can stay with him, right?”
“You’re his blood pet. It would be odd if you didn’t.”
Thorne and Des left the suite, leaving me and Cy alone together in his bedroom. I’d never been in here before until now. It was almost funny how they left us alone here, like me being in this room was completely routine. But no, I didn’t belong here. Cyan had never wanted me here in any intimate capacity.
And yet, I couldn’t leave him.
His skin had broken out into goosebumps, so I pulled the covers up to his shoulders and smoothed them out. The wound on his neck already looked much better, no longer a mess of jagged, bleeding flesh. Skin and muscle had already knitted themselves together, the new tissue red and tender.
He looked peaceful now, deeply asleep. His lips were parted slightly, and my pulse fluttered at the thought of our kiss in the kitchen.
Abruptly, I stood from his bedside and left the room. My heartbeat felt too fast, and I had a moment of dizziness as I walked out. The blood loss was stunningly clear in that moment, and I took extra care on my way to the kitchenette. All the physical manifestations of my feelings for Cy were amplified by my low blood cell count. He’d better not wake up too quickly or I’d swoon right in front of him.
I nibbled on goldfish crackers and bits of salami while keeping an eye on the open doorway of his bedroom. Staying right at his side felt too close, too intimate in a way I had no right to be, but I still wanted to keep an eye on him. I wanted to be available if he needed me.
Or my blood.
I held my own wrist, feeling the tenderness of the puncture marks as I recalled how it had felt. Thinking about that almost made me swoon. It was ten times more intense than when I’d cut my thumb. Each pull on my vein was like a full-body caress, the sensation concentrating the strongest in my nipples and clit. If I hadn’t been so worried about him surviving, I might have orgasmed.
Right in front of his clan leader and his friend, which would have been mortifying.
I never wanted it to stop, and that in itself was equally terrifying and thrilling. I wanted Cyan to take it all from me, for my life force to heal him and bring back the vampire who smirked and flirted and made me feel special.
My phone buzzed with a text from Amy, pulling me out of my low-iron induced fantasy. I immediately hit the button to call her, eager for a distraction.
“Isn’t it past your bedtime, young lady?” I said when she picked up, heading to the couch with my snacks and a bottle of apple juice.
“Leave me alone, Mom,” she snickered. “You would not believe the shitshow today.”
“Well, don’t leave me in suspense.” I reclined and propped myself up with couch cushions so that I could still see into Cy’s bedroom. “What happened? You okay?”
“Oh yeah, nothing to do with me. But we all got up this morning to find that Heather disappeared into thin air.”
“Whoa.” The goldfish I’d just put in my mouth almost fell out. “Did you find her?”
“No, she’s still AWOL. Not that she ever had to check in with anybody, but we were all worried since she doesn’t know her way around here.”
“And didn’t believe in vampires until like, two days ago,” I pointed out.
“Exactly. So the council had everyone go searching in case she got lost or something. But there’s no trace of her. You know what we did find, though?”
“Huh?” I took a sip of apple juice and had the random thought that I should make a hard cider soon.
“Another entrance to the human world. With tracks and broken branches like someone had been through recently.”
“Oh shit, where?”
“Directly west of the compound. Maybe a mile from where our usual one is.”
“Huh, that’s close.”
“Yeah, there was no blood or signs of distress, so everyone was relieved she’s most likely okay.”
“So did they keep looking for her?”
“No. They discussed it but she obviously didn’t want to stay, so why force her, you know? And even if she talks, one girl rambling about vampires and overlapping worlds isn’t likely to cause any trouble for us.”
The next goldfish paused on its way to my mouth. “I hope that’s true. It’s not like she has any proof, right?”
“Right, exactly. She’s just another person who’s stumbled into our world and then stumbled her way back home. It’s like people over there have a mental shield up. No one ever believes them.”
“You should still be careful. The vampires don’t want any human-led governments or agencies poking around their territory. All it takes is one curious person to bring back proof. Next thing we know, they’re invading with tanks and machine guns.”
Amy laughed. “How do you know that?”
“I’ve watched the human-world documentaries on the one channel in Robin’s place. It’s what humans like to do, discover a new place and invade it.”
“You say that like you’re not human.” Amy’s tone was teasing, but I didn’t miss the slight accusation underneath.
“Of course I am. But you know.” I shifted positions on the couch, switching the phone to my other ear. “This place belongs to the supernatural species. They were here first. Humans have been here a long time too but the magic, the land, it’s all theirs. We’re guests here.”
“Well, how nice of them to let us stay,” Amy chuckled. “And not feed on us. Some of us, anyway.”
I sank deeper into the couch cushions. It wasn’t like she actually knew Cy had just fed on me, but it felt like she was teasing about it anyway.
“Anyway, how are you? Is your arranged vampire husband still pissy and brooding? He seemed friendly enough the other night.”
“It’s…complicated,” I sighed. “He was actually injured earlier tonight while out on patrol. He’s doing okay and sleeping it off though. I’m keeping an eye on him.”
“Glad to hear it. Is he still being an ass, though?”
I almost choked on a goldfish from my laugh. “Well, kind of. Yeah.”
“Fuck him, then. I hope he rots.”
“Don’t be a bitch.” I grinned as I said it, because there was nothing like having your best friend always in your corner. Especially when wrestling your complicated feelings for a vampire.
“Too late, skank.”
The next thirty seconds were filled with Amy and I trying to suppress our laughter, and making weird snorting and wheezing noises in the process.
“Okay, but really,” she sighed as we composed ourselves. “I’m sorry to hear that and I hope he recovers. He’s an ass but you care about him, so I wish him well.”
“Thanks, Ames.”
“Wait.” There was a long pause on the phone. “Did you give him blood?”
I bit the inside of my cheek. There was no lying to her. “Yes.”
“Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. Got a little dizzy when I stood up fast, but I’m okay. I’m eating snacks and drinking juice.”
“So does this change things between you and him? The whole blood pet thing?”
“I don’t know,” I admitted. “I’ll have to wait until he’s awake and see if he talks to me.”
Amy made a disgruntled noise which promptly turned into a yawn. “I don’t like him jerking you around. It was one thing when we all thought he would instantly kill you, but now that he’s keeping you alive, he better be good to you.”
I wasn’t sure how to respond to that. She and Robin were the only people who had been good to me my whole life. It was like I had a lot of experience in that regard.
“Well, he let me see you,” I pointed out. “And gave us these phones we’re talking on.”
And my wine making stuff. And the most electric kiss I’ve ever felt. I wanted to list out all the ways Cyan had been good to me. But the ways he’d confused me loomed over all the positive things like a dark cloud.
“Not good enough,” Amy quipped. “I need to see him sweep my best friend off her feet. He’s gotta put the book boyfriends to shame.”
Well, that’s not gonna happen, I thought, but smiled at the sentiment. “If anyone deserves being swept off their feet, it’s you, bestie.”
“Nah.” Amy scoffed. “I’m not main character material.”
I was just about to argue that when another yawn came over the phone speaker. “I’m gonna let you go, Ames. You’re exhausted.”
“Fine, mom ,” she chuckled. “Talk tomorrow night?”
“Wouldn’t miss it. Love you, goodnight.”
“Night, love you.” She already sounded asleep when I ended the call.
Cyan began stirring about two hours later. I heard his sheets rustling and sprang up to check on him. I still felt a little wobbly but definitely stronger than directly after I fed him.
His eyes fluttered open the moment I sat at his bedside. “Tavi,” he croaked, his voice thick with fatigue. “You’re here.” He sounded surprised, and nothing could have prepared me for his hand reaching to brush against my knee.
“Yeah, of course I am.” Throwing caution to the wind, I wrapped my fingers around his. They were stronger, warmer than before. “How do you feel?”
“Like shit.” The corner of his mouth pulled upward in the barest hint of a smile. “Weak as a hungover baby rat. That drowned.”
I squeezed his hand and felt slight pressure in return. “Your sense of humor is back, so that’s definitely an improvement.”
“At this rate, I’ll feel like death warmed over in no time.” He released my hand, his expression turning solemn as he gripped my knee, fingers stroking gently over my thigh. “Thank you for your blood, Tavi. You saved my life.”
My teeth sank into my lip, resisting the urge to spread my knees wider, just to see how far up his touch would tease my skin. “I think Thorne deserves that honor for getting you here so quickly, but I’m glad I could help.”
He let out a soft breath of a laugh. “He’s a quick thinking bastard, but it was you being here, you willing to do what you never wanted, that is the reason I’m breathing right now.” Cy licked his lips, looking conflicted as his gaze drifted over my neck. “And I’m sorry you were put in that position, having to go back on what we originally agreed upon so you could save my sorry ass.”
“Cy.” I shook my head. “I didn’t mind giving you my blood, not at all. To save your life, it wasn’t even a question in my mind. If I had to, I’d do it all over again.”
He didn’t say anything in response, but only stared at me with an expression I couldn’t read. It went on for so long that I wondered if he zoned out completely.
“Cy?” I cocked my head. “Do you need more blood?”
His eyes snapped back into focus with a quick lick of his lips. “No, not right now.”
“Okay.” I forced a smile, wondering why his no felt like a rejection. “Okay then, I’ll just let you rest?—”
“Tavi.” My name was a plea from his lips, punctuated by the light squeeze of his hand around my knee. “Will you stay?” I’d never seen him look so raw, so vulnerable, as he did in that moment. “Please.”
My pulse kicked up, and this time it had nothing to do with missing a pint or so of blood. I was all nerves and elated disbelief, my whole body thrumming like a hummingbird’s wings as he pulled the covers down and scooted to make space for me.
It was like that moment I first arrived at the clan’s compound, that feeling of disconnect from my body, watching myself go through the motions. But there was no fear sharpening my senses, just awe and a sense of wonderment at the closeness he was allowing me.
I nestled into his side, gingerly resting my head on his chest as his arm draped around me. The raised texture of his scars, of the vow he made to me, scraped against my cheek. The rest of him was smooth, like warm marble.
Cyan’s mouth brushed my hairline, lips moving as if whispering something. Before I could react, his whole body relaxed into the peacefulness of deep sleep.