Chapter 21 #2
“You know you don’t have to,” she said. “I understand your position.”
It didn’t feel like understanding.
“Please,” I said. “All I ask for is dinner.”
She held my gaze for a second longer this time. Then nodded once. “Okay.”
“I’ll send a car to pick you up at eight,” I added.
“Alright.” She was still not giving me anything to hold onto.
I didn’t like this version of distance that was coming from her. At all.
By the time she stepped out of the car, I was outside waiting.
I don’t usually do that. Normally I let people come in, get settled, then I meet them where they are. Scratch that, I didn’t let people in my house at all. But tonight I couldn’t sit still.
I watched her through the window before she even opened the door.
She looked good.
Different from earlier but still put together and polished.
Her hair was down this time, falling over her shoulders.
Dress simple, fitted, not doing too much but still enough to remind me exactly who I was dealing with.
She wanted me to look. She wanted to remind me what I gave up.
She stepped out, closed the door behind her, and looked up at the house like she was taking it in for the first time.
I walked down the steps toward her.
“You okay?” I asked.
She glanced at me, then gave a small nod.
“Yeah.”
“Where’s the dog?”
She glanced at me sideways. “Hartland’s watching him.”
That little attitude was still there but at least she wasn’t completely checked out.
“Come on,” I said, stepping aside so she could walk in first.
I didn’t cut corners tonight. Table set properly, candles lit, but nothing too over the top. I saw her take it all in as she stepped inside.
“You did all this?” she asked, glancing at the table.
“Yeah.”
“For me?”
“Yeah.”
She hummed lightly at that but didn’t say anything else making it clear she wasn’t about to make this easy for me.
Fair.
I ushered her to her seat then took my seat across from her.
For a second, neither of us spoke. I reached for the bottle of wine, pouring her a glass first before filling mine. She looked at me for a second, then picked up her glass, taking a small sip before setting it down again.
“I meant what I said earlier,” I started. “About reimbursing you. I’ll have it handled by tomorrow.”
She waved that off lightly. “I said no.”
“Since when do you tell me what to do, Rabbit?” I teased.
She didn’t even pretend to be amused. “Look man, that’s business. I ain’t come here for that.”
I nodded once.
“I don’t like how things been between us this week—” I started.
She let out a small breath. “But you created that.”
“I know.”
“You put me out for no reason after you stopped talking to me! You expect me to come crawling back or something?”
“No—”
“Good, ‘cause it’ll never happen. I’m not gonna stand being treated this way. You asked for this so deal with it. It ain’t fun when the rabbit got the gun, is it?”
“Aurora,” I said calmly. “I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry I pushed you away, but I had my reasons. I’ll do anything you want to make this right, Rabbit. Anything. Tell me what you need.”
She didn’t answer right away. She just picked up her fork, cutting into the food like she needed a second to think.
“You want me to be honest?” she asked finally.
“Always.”
“I need you to stop hiding things from me,” she said. “Stop telling me what’s good for me and what I can and can’t handle. I’m not a kid, Marlon.”
“I know that.”
“Then act like it. What happened to all that communication you was pushing for? It ran out or?”
All I could say in response was, “I’m sorry, Aurora.”
She reached for the bottle and topped her glass off, then she took a sip, leaning back in her chair with eyes on me.
“You still circling it,” she said.
“I’m not—”
“You are!” She cut in. “You been talking around something since I got here.”
She set the glass down with force.
“Just say it! You scared or something?”
I exhaled slowly, dragging my hand across the table, fingers pressing into the wood.
“It ain’t that simple, Bunny.”
“It is,” she said. “You just don’t want it to be.”
I looked at her. She wasn’t giving me a break or letting me ease into it. She wanted it straight up. So I gave it to her.
“…back in the day,” I started, my voice lowered now, “before your parents got married… me and your mother… had sex.”
She didn’t move.
“I regret it,” I rushed. “I never should’ve done it.”
Still nothing from her.
So I pushed through it.
“Yes, your father and her were together,” I added. “It was just… it was a lot going on back then. We were so young and messy. I feel bad about it to this day. And then I started sleeping with you and—”
“Stop.”
I stopped.
She sat there for a second, staring at me like she was trying to process what I just said. Then she laughed. “You’re joking.”
“I’m not.”
Her smile dropped. “You fucked my mother?”
“Yes.”
“And now you’re sitting here acting like that’s the reason you can’t be with me?”
“It’s part of it, yeah.”
She shook her head slowly, pushing her chair back to create space between us.
“No. No, I need you to actually say it,” she said. “You slept with my mom while she was with my dad and you felt guilty about it… and now you feel guilty about fucking me too?”
I didn’t answer right away, because when she said it like that, it sounded very fucked up, exactly how it was.
“And why you sitting here telling me all this about you fucking my mom while my parents was together? You tryna say you think you my real daddy or some shit?”
“What? No! Why would I fuck you if I thought that?”
“Just answer the damn question.”
I took a deep breath.
“No, I ain’t your real father or nothing. Dillon is your dad. What happened between me and Alice happened years before you were born.”
“So if it ain’t that, why you just ain’t tell me the truth?”
“I didn’t know how to tell you,” I answered.
“And now you sitting here acting like you some tortured man, like this big secret was why you couldn’t be with me?”
“Like I said, it’s part of it—”
“Part of it?!” she snapped. “Part of it? Marlon, what the fuck is wrong with you? You sat there, let me get close to you, let me trust you, let me feel something real with you—”
“I didn’t—”
“Yes, you did!” she snapped. “Don’t do that. Don’t sit here and act like I dragged you into this against your will. You knew what this was turning into because you felt it too!”
She stood up then.
“Are you serious right now?” she continued, pacing with hands in her hair. “You let me fall for you! Why the fuck did you thought this was something to sit on while you were in my bed!”
I clenched my jaw. “I didn’t know how to tell you.”
“So you just didn’t?” she shot back. “You just kept fucking me like it wasn’t relevant?”
She stopped pacing and looked at me, disgust settling in.
“You sick as hell,” she said. “You a motherfucker! Literally! You sat there knowing you had history with my mother… and still touched me.”
“It wasn’t like that—”
“Oh, so what was it like?” she snapped. “Enlighten me, Marlon. Because right now, it’s looking real nasty.”
I stood up then, finally. “You’re twisting it.”
“Am I?” she laughed, but there was nothing funny in it. “Because from where I’m standing, it looks like you couldn’t have her… so you settled for me.”
My chest tightened.
“That’s not true.”
“It feels true!” she shouted. “It feels like you been using me to play out some sick fantasy you ain’t get to finish with my mom.”
“Stop,” I said, sharper now.
“No, you stop!” she snapped right back. “You don’t get to tell me how to feel about this. You don’t get to drop something like that and then act like I’m overreacting.”
She shook her head, stepping back from me.
“You not overreacting. I know it’s fucked up.
But it happened a long time ago. I stayed away from your family for a long time alright?
I didn’t even remember what Alice looked like until I found out you were her kid.
I felt like shit for not saying anything, especially after you said you had feelings for me but by then it was too late. ”
“You lying bitch, I don’t believe a word you say. You had a million opportunities to tell me the truth but decided pussy was more important. Now you invite me over here to tell me this bullshit? I’m outta here.”
She walked to the front door and I followed.
“Bunny. Let me finish talking to you. It’s not even like that, okay? I didn’t hold it back ‘cause I wanted to keep sleeping with you. I’m just telling you now because I thought you deserved to know.”
“Fuck out of here!” She turned to me with her hand on the door handle. “I deserved to know before you put your hands on me again! I feel fucking dumb for sitting here thinking this was something real when whole time you had this in the back of your mind.”
I took a step toward her. She stepped back immediately.
“Don’t,” she said.
I stopped. “I’m sorry, Bunny. Everything you feel right now is valid. I’m beyond fucked up. I hurt you and I swear I never wanted it to come to that.”
She laughed once but it was ironic, like what I said was a joke.
“You said this would break my heart,” she said, voice lower now but still shaking.
I swallowed.
“Is this it?” she asked. “Is this the heart break you promised me?”
I didn’t say anything.
She let out a short, bitter laugh again then opened my door.
“Good fucking job.”