III Meditations #2
“It just seems like Ai’s protection is impressive,” Rose said. “Beatrice just has her phone to call 911 if the killer shows up again.”
“I cannot speak for that,” he said.
“I just want to protect all of the students,” Rose said.
Ai and Caitlyn met in the hallway during third period. They had both planned to leave their classrooms at the same time.
“Babe,” Caitlyn said to Ai.
“Hey,” Ai said. “We have a problem. I’ve run the numbers. I won’t admit this later. I’m probably going to die.”
“What the fuck? That can’t happen. Unacceptable. We need to do something, anything possible, to make sure that you survive. Anything?” Caitlyn asked.
“He’s killing geeks. And he could kill girls. He’s probably going to attack me, to break the rich girl who has a soft life. That fits the killer’s profile.”
“So we’re not safe,” Caitlyn said. “But we are, because we are fantastic, beautiful bitches.”
“But in danger because I’m a geek,” Ai said.
“Because of that,” Caitlyn said. “Because you play esports very well.” “I do indeed,” Ai said. “I also play strategy games very well.”
“I know,” Caitlyn said. “Fucking the princess has perks. Loving the princess has perks.” Caitlyn kissed Ai on the lips.
Ai kissed her back. “I find you unbelievably wonderful,” Ai said. “Thank you for dating me. You are a delight.”
“It’s fine,” Caitlyn said. “All the hard work that we do, I’m a model, an actor, a writer, and we both know what grades we get. And this fucker with a mask is going to butcher you? And maybe me? Utterly unbelievable framed bullshit.”
“What grades do we get?” Ai asked.
“A’s,” Caitlyn said. “We get A’s. You know we get A’s. Why?”
“I like to say it. We work so hard to get A’s. We just have way too much sex to deserve to get straight A’s.”
“I’m sorry,” Caitlyn said. “I study. I work hard. It’s not just the ugly nerds who like geek culture and play board games who get great grades. I can ace all my tests and still be attractive and charming and a delight in bed.”
Caitlyn and Ai kissed deeply for a long moment and then went their separate ways back to the classrooms that they were supposed to be attending.
Jalon finally made it to the psychologist’s office. Various administrators sat in their offices. He walked into the psychologist’s office immediately.
Rose Sanchez sat in her office, playing with her computer and surfing the internet for sports scores. She and her husband watched baseball most spring and summer days and grilled burgers and brats outside, and she very much looked forward to doing that this evening.
“Hello,” Rose said. “Come in, Jalon.”
Jalon walked in and sat down.
“Let’s talk about my emotions,” Jalon said. “And then pretend that anything you say can help me at all.”
“Lance led a wonderful life and hated himself despite having friends, role-playing, school, board games, and a family that, although divisive, loved him very much. He should have lived fifty more years, and he didn’t.
That’s a terrible fact. Right now your actions matter more than you can imagine.
Understand? What are you going to do about a killer murdering your friends? ”
“Thanks. My life sucks. I know. Thank you, though.”
“I worry about your actions. Realize that things will get a little better over time, and you will remember your lost loved ones forever. Survival is the key priority now. I know it doesn’t seem like it, but Lance would want you to do anything possible to survive.”
“I will do anything I can to die fighting this madness, this killer.”
“It’s not,” Rose said. “You listen to me, Jalon. Your life is not over. Your choices determine what life you have. Your friend was murdered, but he made many choices which created a beautiful life for himself.”
“You know that it wasn’t a suicide?” Jalon asked.
“I am a qualified psychologist and talked to the cop, and we confirmed that yes, we know that he wasn’t suicidal. I know my students. The question now is: what to do with the time you have left?” “Revenge?” Jalon asked.
“Fuck revenge,” Rose said. “Try to survive. Be intelligent. Make good choices. The world is wonderful and terrible in equal measures. Try to survive and live a wonderful life despite the terrors.”
“Good,” Jalon said. “Smart. Sounds good.”
“Survive until someone can solve this. I’m sorry. You understand?” Rose asked.
“Yes,” Jalon said.
Jalon, Walter, and Macmillan never really followed through on their investigation. It just didn’t happen. They intended to do it but didn’t know how to do it and couldn’t pull it off. They left the detective work to the police.
Anne and Rose spoke at a brief press conference.
“There is a murderer in our town of New Liberty,” Anne said. “He has killed Lance Grey and the Tritten father. We are doing everything possible to solve these murders.
“We believe that the suspect is a man, five feet ten inches tall, with dark clothing and a wolf mask.
He used a gun in one murder and a large dagger in the second one.
If anyone has any information about the case or has seen him, please call the police at 911 immediately. Do not confront him yourself.
“We believe that the murders are indeed connected and that the one criminal is targeting a group of people or a group of friends. We want to do anything possible to find a way to protect these people.”
“Is this a serial killer then?”
“We can’t say that yet,” Anne said.
“Is the killer a man for sure then?” a reporter asked.
“We can’t say that for sure yet either,” Anne said.
“Do you think you will solve this soon?” a reporter asked.
“We are using all possible resources,” Anne said.
“Listen, we are doing everything we can. We have a plan for keeping the teenagers alive and healthy. We think it’s a good one.
If it doesn’t work, then that’s on me. Parents - understand that we are trying to protect your children and that one teenager has died. ”
“Could a teenager have done this?” a reporter asked.
“We can’t confirm or deny that yet,” Anne said. “Listen, guys, we are working on it. It will be done. We are working the case. Okay? Thanks. Rose? Anything to add?”
“Just that any teenager that is troubled should seek counseling immediately, and anyone who knows about a troubled teenager should tell us about him or her right away. We need to help these people. That is all,” Rose said.
Jalon walked into the high school, smiling and being open and friendly with everyone that he met.
He hated his life at present - a best friend dying would do that to you.
However, he had a policy to continue: be nice to everyone at school.
He knew that he had to be nice to literally every person.
Literally. Every Person. That included Bailey.
He knew that he had to do this because he hated the bullying that happened in high school and wanted to get past any of it.
Being nice to everyone was his way of fighting against the infighting and terrible cruelty of everyone at New Liberty High School.
He said hi to everyone he knew who walked past him.
He stopped and had conversations whenever it seemed appropriate.
He didn’t worry about ever talking too much - he was still relatively quiet.
He was a friendly person. He gave a chance to all the victims and outsiders and geeks at New Liberty High School.
He hated himself as he talked to those people. He fucking hated himself as he talked to all of these people. He remembered that he failed to save his friend.
Maintain the illusion, self.
Be nice. People deserve kindness.
Walter walked into his therapist’s office and waited.
He arrived at 2:43 p.m. for a 3:00 p.m. appointment.
He played with his phone for a few minutes while waiting for his therapist, Rose.
There was a new game out that mostly used D & D’s rules but did its own thing with them.
Walter read an online review of the new game.
The game’s creators had a famous online role-playing game that tons of fans watched on the internet.
He ordered the game. He had heard enough - it had cards and character classes and narrative play.
He ordered it. More money spent. His mom would be a little
pissed. Just a little.
Rose walked into the waiting area. She wore blue jeans and had a polo shirt on. She smiled and gestured at Walter. She held a water in her hand. She preferred the soda but needed to hydrate regularly. She was a responsible adult.
“Come on in,” Rose said.
“Thanks,” Walter said.
Walter walked into the office. It had a couple of chairs, a couch, and a desk with a chair. The desk had a computer on it.
“So we have priorities,” Rose said. “You have a crippling, debilitating mental illness which makes it almost impossible to function, and you’re going to high school, and one of your friends is dead. So my first question is: how’s the Ravenloft campaign going?”
“Pretty good,” Walter said. “The characters managed to get to a wizard’s tower and want to stop the wizard who sacrificed a virgin. They don’t know that the wizard is actually doing it because his body has been stolen and the lich is controlling him. The wizard is actually completely innocent.”
“Let’s hope they figure that out,” Rose said.
“Absolutely,” Walter said. “They might. They might not. It’s hard to tell. They can go wherever they want and do whatever they want, remember?”
“And the schizophrenia,” Rose said.
“Same,” Walter said. “Stories, same. Voices, same. Still telling stories. I still lose in the stories. I still get mad when I lose in the stories in my head.”
“Damn,” Rose said. “That’s terrible.”
“They say things to me, terrible things,” Walter said. “But I try to overcome. Make sure to be able to do everything anyone else can do.”
“Great,” Rose said. “I mean, I remember when you first showed up, nine months ago. You hardly spoke.”
“I feel better,” Walter said. “It is ironic, because Lance died. And do you know what I learned? Absolutely nothing.”