15. Gennie
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
gennie
“Ireally do not want to talk about Bryce, but since you insist, here goes nothing.” The words tumble past my lips in a shaky, breathless rush.
I pull my knees into my chest, my insides trembling as I begin to rock slowly back and forth on the couch in an attempt to self-soothe.
The anxiety is a living, breathing weight in my throat, and in a burst of agitated energy, I throw off the blanket I knit on a whim to find a new hobby.
It’s not at all even, longer than it is wide, and an array of small to bigger holes.
Who knew counting is necessary when it comes to knitting?
I suddenly feel suffocated by the heat, only to freeze and panic at the vulnerability and immediately wrap myself up again.
It’s like when you’re a child and you refuse to sleep with one leg out in case a monster comes to attack you, not at all rational thinking, but that’s how it feels right about now.
I’m still in Gavin’s gray shirt. I didn’t want to change, didn’t want to lose his scent or the comfort of how it makes me feel being surrounded by it.
If our relationship was over, at least I got to keep this one thing of his.
After Alex dropped me off, I had the forethought to clean the dirt and gravel from my bare feet before pulling on a thick pair of wool socks.
The mug of hot chamomile tea Alex lovingly made for me sits completely forgotten and abandoned, growing cold on the scuffed-up wood coffee table.
“Take your time, baby girl. We’ve got all the time in the world.
” Gavin moves in front of me, using the table as a seat.
His massive frame still manages to tower over my curled form, gray eyes burning with an intense, unwavering focus.
He reaches out and places his warm hands gently on my knees, through the blanket, grounding me.
“He, umm… he talked about my body. A lot,” I start, my voice cracking as the memories come to the forefront of my mind after trying to bury them six foot deep in the ground.
I look at my hands, unable to meet his gaze as the confession begins to pour out of me.
“It was constant, every single day. He told me I wasn’t thin enough.
He made me feel like I wasn’t enough in any capacity, as if I was lucky he was even looking at me.
He picked apart what I ate, what I wore, how my clothes fit, and even how my nose was constantly in a book.
” A low rumble vibrates in Gavin’s chest, but he keeps his hands soft on my legs, letting me speak my piece.
“And the absolute irony of it all,” I say, a bitter laugh escaping me, “is that meanwhile, he couldn’t even keep a job.
He’d sit on my couch while I’d work, ask for money, living off me, while picking me apart piece by piece.
God, I was so stupid for letting him into my life for as long as I did.
It’s not like I loved him. I’m not sure I even liked him, to be honest. He was just there. ”
“You weren’t and you aren’t stupid,” Gavin rasps, his thumb stroking me. “You’re kind, Genevieve. He took advantage of your good heart.”
“I have my friends,” I continue, the words spilling out in a desperate ramble.
“I knew they didn’t like him. Alex hated his guts from day one, and everyone else kept hinting that I deserved better.
Looking back, I know I did, but I was deep in some mystical fog, where you think you can change a man.
That’s on me. It took me realizing it on my own to finally kick him to the curb, and because I’ve always been a naturally curvy woman, it wasn’t until I noticed my own drastic weight change that realization hit.
I looked in the mirror and saw how thin, pale, and sickly I looked from the stress of trying to please him.
The lightbulb finally went off after that.
” I take a shuddering breath, my fingers clutching at the fabric of my shirt.
“After I kicked him out, I slowly gained back my curves,” I admit softly, looking at Gavin.
A myriad of emotions is written on his face: anger, sadness, and awe.
“I got healthy again. Still, I shielded my body from the outside world. I didn’t want anyone to see me or have an opinion on my figure.
I started wearing loose, baggy clothes, like the ones you saw me in the office.
” I take a deep breath before finishing.
“I didn’t want to be seen just for my body to anyone ever again.
And when I saw him today…” My voice trails off as tears well in my eyes again.
“Gavin, when I saw him standing on your porch, it wasn’t his rude remarks that made me run. ”
“Then what was it, baby girl?” He leans in closer, wiping a stray tear off my cheek. Through all of this, he’s remained patient, stayed quiet, and let me get it all out.
“I couldn’t bear the thought of being the reason you lose your son,” I whisper.
He catches one tear after the other. “I saw him, realized who he is to you, and my heart shattered. I didn’t want you to choose me over him or him over me.
I couldn’t put you in that position. I thought…
I thought that if I ran, you wouldn’t have to break your family apart. ”
For a second, the room is quiet, too quiet.
Then Gavin lets out a heavy breath. Without saying a word, he reaches down, wrapping his large, powerful arms around my waist and beneath my thighs, before he lifts me effortlessly off the couch.
I gasp as he sits down in the same spot I just vacated, with me in his lap, straddling his thick thighs, facing him.
His hand tangles in the hair at the nape of my neck and he brings his lips down on mine.
The kiss isn’t gentle. It’s deep, possessive, and soul-consuming.
A kiss meant to wipe away every bad memory, every insult, and every doubt that plagues my mind.
His tongue slips inside, deepening with every sweep of our tongues.
My head spins, my mind quiets down, and I’m clinging to his shoulders, gasping for air against his lips.
When he finally pulls back, barely an inch, his dark eyes are ablaze with pure devotion.
“You’re so damn incredible, Genevieve. So caring.
So giving. Always looking after everyone else before yourself, even when it comes to a worthless piece of shit who treated you like scum,” he murmurs, his voice thick with emotion as his forehead rests against mine.
“I don’t care about blood, and I sure as hell don’t care about a son who acts like a monster,” Gavin swears fiercely.
“You didn’t break my family, baby girl. He destroyed his own standing long before you came along.
You are the best thing that has ever happened to me.
I love you, Genevieve. Do you hear me? I love you. ”
“Gavin.” A lump forms in my throat, and my heart slams against my chest at the sound of those three words falling from his lips.
“I love you,” he repeats, his voice dropping into a low, husky growl.
“And I’m going to spend every second showing and telling you exactly how much you mean to me.
” His hands move, gliding beneath the hem of my shirt, and with one swift movement, he pulls the fabric up and over my head, tossing it to the side.
I sit bare before him in the dim light of my living room.
Any time I’m with him, I don’t feel the urge to hide or cover myself, and today isn’t any different.
Gavin looks at me like I’m a masterpiece.
“I love you,” he whispers against my skin, leaning down and pressing a warm, lingering kiss to the soft skin of my shoulder.
He shifts his mouth to the slope of my neck to press another kiss there.
“I love every inch of you.” His hands move up, his palms cupping the soft weight of my breasts, his fingers gently squeezing and rolling my hardening nipples between his thumbs and forefingers.
“Gavin.” A sharp moan fills the room. My back arches into his touch as heat pools low in my belly.
“Please.” It comes out as a whimper. My hands drop down to his waist, and I reach for the button fly of his dark jeans, my fingers working frantically to undo them before pushing the heavy denim down.
My hips lift up, as do his, to help me push the fabric out of the way.
His throbbing cock springs free, hot and rigid against my core.
“Christ, baby girl.” His eyes close as the tip drags through my wetness.
When he opens them, there’s zero hesitation.
He pulls me down completely on his length, showing only absolute worship and unconditional love.
My hands hold on to his shoulders as my hips rock, meeting his short and shallow thrusts.
“I love you, too, Gavin,” I whisper, the truth ringing clear and strong.
The moment the words leave my lips, he lets out a groan.
The vibration from his chest hits me straight between my thighs.
His hands tighten on my hips, his long, thick fingers digging firmly into my skin as his thrusts shift from cautious to deep and demanding.
Every upward snap of his hips sends a wave of heat straight to my core.
He lifts himself slightly off the cushion, his hands going beneath my thighs to open me wider, taking full control of the pace.
He drives his thick length all the way in, bottoming out until his pubic bone presses against my clit, sending intense waves of pleasure through every nerve ending in my body.
“You’re mine, Genevieve. Forever,” he rasps, his head dropping to my breast, his tongue skating around my nipple. “Every gorgeous, breathtaking inch of you belongs right here with me. Tell me, baby girl. Tell me it’s forever.”
“It’s forever, Gavin. We’re forever,” I gasp, arching my back.
My fingers twist in his damp hair. His eyes blaze into mine as he matches my movements, driving upward to meet every single slide of my body.
The wetness between my legs fills the quiet living room, and when Gavin hears it, I watch what it does to him.
“Look how well your pretty pussy takes me,” he murmurs, his voice rough with need.
“So fucking tight, milking me like you never want to let go.” His broad palm glides up my torso, and he spreads his fingers wide over my ribcage.
He goes back to pinching my nipple, sending a spike of pleasure to my core, causing me to clamp hard around his dick and pulse around him.
“Don’t let go.” My head spins. The need, the desire, the tension, it all becomes one. “Gavin, I’m close. God, I’m so close.”
“Take it, baby girl.” His pace accelerates into a faster, punishing rhythm.
“Come all over my dick. Show me how much you need me.” His hands lock around my waist, lifting and lowering me with an effortless power while driving himself so deep inside of me over and over again, I swear the world dissolves around us.
I throw my head back, and a loud, breathless scream tears up my throat as my orgasm takes hold of my body.
The walls of my pussy contract around his thick length, sending wave after wave of intense ecstasy rippling through my body.
“Fuck, baby girl.” My gasp undoes him. What remaining control he has is gone. A guttural roar is pulled from him, and he pulls me flush against his chest. He drives himself up one last time as he loses all restraint, then his hips lock tight against mine as he comes inside me.
We cling to one another, our bodies trembling, our chests heaving.
Gavin buries his face in the crook of my neck, kissing my sensitive skin with tenderness, holding me so close I can feel his heart beat against mine.
And I never want to move, not from Gavin, not from his lap, and not from his heart.