12. Chapter 11 Katrina
F ebruary 2024
I hear the excited squealing before I have the chance to round the corner and enter the lobby. Once I do, I have no question as to what’s going on. Across the room, Josie is embracing a taller woman while jumping up and down. This could only mean one thing: Mia Sheridan has arrived.
Off to the side, Bryce is rolling his eyes, but there’s a fond smile on his face. His gaze drifts over to me as I approach from the outside pool I was just checking on. “You would think they haven’t seen each other in years, right? We were literally in Charlotte last weekend helping her pack.”
“Oh, my god! You must be Kat!”
With a slight jump, I glance over at Mia to see her smiling at me. Her bright and welcoming smile is almost a contradiction to the rest of the woman standing before me. She’s tall, with long legs encased in dark, torn jeans, and a cute top exposing tattoos scattered along her arms and collarbones. Her dark brown hair is in a messy pile on top of her head, and light, natural makeup highlights her pale skin. Her lipstick is a deep, vibrant shade of red. And it’s perfectly applied.
I’m instantly jealous of her makeup skills.
“Hi.” I grin back when I remember she had spoken to me. I extend my hand toward her. “Yeah, I’m Kat. Nice to meet you.”
“You too,” she beams back, shaking my hand. “Josie has been keeping me updated on the construction—things are coming together beautifully.”
A faint blush creeps up my cheeks. “Thank you, but it’s easy to follow a plan.”
She scoffs. “Oh, please. It’s easy to come up with a plan, and hard as hell to execute one. Plus, we all know Bryce wouldn’t be able to pull any of this off without you.”
“Awe, I love you, too, Mia,” he sasses back.
She pays him absolutely no mind. “From what Josie’s told me, I think the two of us are going to get along great.”
Stepping up behind Josie to wrap his arms around her, Bryce groans. “Oh god, there’s two of them now. Why didn’t I see that coming?”
Josie laughs, patting his arm. “I think you’ll be fine.”
“Easy for you to say. They both like you.”
“You know you’re my favorite of all her boyfriends, Clark!”
“That’s not a compliment, Mia,” he shoots back. Josie looks like someone just told her the secret to happiness at the two of them fighting. “I’ve heard everything about them, met one of them, and they were all assholes.”
“Well, she’s clearly not begging Josie to breakup with you, Bryce.” I don’t know where my teasing tone came from, but I’m saying the words before I even register them. I’m not used to bantering with him. I keep going. “I think that means it is a compliment.”
Mia’s smiling face turns back to me. “Yes, thank you! Jos, you were right. We’re going to be great friends.”
“You remind me of one another,” Josie says from Bryce’s arms.
And I think Josie is losing it.
I can’t see a single thing I have in common with the woman in front of me, no matter how much I wish I could be more like her. Mia seems to be the embodiment of a female badass and might even come across a little unapproachable. That’s not me at all.
“If we both love to give Bryce a hard time, we’ll be great together,” Mia declares.
“Yes, I’m so happy we hired you, Mia. Now I get to deal with you being mean to me every day.”
“Honestly, it was the main selling point for me,” she admits with a smirk.
I’m not sure what Bryce and Carter have to offer Mia in terms of a job, but I get the sense she was needing a fresh start. Bryce and Josie look out for the people they care about; that much has already become true. I’m learning that being their friend means someone always has my back. It’s not something I’m used to, and not something I necessarily have now, but I feel myself getting closer to it. Believing I’m deserving of a something like that.
“How about Josie and Kat show me around?” Mia’s question pulls me back to the present. “I’d love to see how everything’s coming together.”
Reluctantly, Bryce releases Josie. “That’s fine. I have a clinic I need to get to at one of the schools.”
“Clinic?” I question, unsure what he means by that.
“It’s like a swim lesson for kids thinking about joining a team,” Mia explains. “Bryce leads them in a series of sets and teaches them other techniques they can use and then runs them through some drills. A lot of schools and teams will jump at the chance to have someone like Bryce teach their kids.”
I glance at Bryce, who shrugs. “It’s a good way to get some money coming in until our club is up and running. Carter and I will also run some clinics or camps in the summer, so it’s extra practice for that.”
I don’t know why, but I didn’t think Bryce was earning an income right now. I thought all of this was being funded by the money he earned as a professional. Now that I know he’s working, at least in some regard, it explains why he’s rarely home on the weekends and why that’s when Josie wants someone to hang out with.
“Okay, show me around!”
A fter showing Mia around the whole complex, Josie invites me to join the two of them for dinner. Desperate for a night out with friends, or at least people who could become friends, I readily agree. I can’t remember the last time I’d gone out with people who weren’t work colleagues or my boyfriend. Having a social life has never been a major concern of mine since I’ve been too focused on pleasing my mother and getting Thomas to take me seriously as an employee.
On the rare occasions I did go out with people my own age, they’re usually Will’s friends, and they made sure I knew I was the odd one out. I didn’t have a medical degree or a fancy office in downtown Charleston. I didn’t fit into whatever mold they thought a doctor’s girlfriend should fit into. I haven’t hung out with Will’s friends for over a year, and he hasn’t made a single comment about it.
Hours later, as I sit in a fun industrial bar with a margarita in front of me and the menu in my hand, I can’t help but feel like I’ve missed out on something fundamental. Mia and Josie chat amicably about the menu with the easy confidence that comes with years of friendship that tells me they’d be perfectly comfortable in total silence.
Silence scares me.
My phone buzzes at my elbow with another text from Will. He’d called me while I was getting ready, wanting to complain about his day. He hadn’t been too happy when I cut him off, telling him I had plans tonight. Especially because it was with people he doesn’t know. I ignore it.
It buzzes five minutes later, once the server has taken our orders and collected the menus. I glare down at it, silently willing him to leave me alone. When I want to talk to him, he can’t be bothered, but the first time I have plans, he wants to be involved.
“If you glare at that phone any harder, it might burst into flames.”
A faint blush coats my cheeks as I flip the phone to rest face down on the table. When I look up, Mia is grinning at me over the top of her margarita. “Sorry, my boyfriend won’t stop texting me even though I told him I’m out with people.”
I try not to cringe at my use of “friends”. We probably weren’t close enough for that, yet. Even Josie and I weren’t quite there.
“I didn’t know you have a boyfriend,” Josie comments, looking intrigued.
“Sounds a bit possessive to me,” Mia retorts.
I bite my lip, keeping my need to defend him at bay. Will has never come up in a conversation with Josie and me, despite the fact we’ve gotten closer. Despite the fact, I confided in Carter about him. Apparently, the news hadn’t spread. And Mia’s practically a stranger; she’s only known me a few hours, but easily picked up on something I haven’t been ready to admit to myself.
My phone buzzes again. Then once more.
I grab it and chuck it in my purse.
Mia arches a dark brow. “If that’s his response to you hanging out with friends, you need to cut your losses and run. How long have you been together?”
“Two years. My mother’s the head of emergency medicine at Charleston Hospital, and she introduced us during his final year as a resident. We’ve been together since.”
I pick at the corner of my napkin, thinking back on our relationship. It was just another thing my mother orchestrated for me. Sure, Will is attractive, and he’s generally a good guy, but is he the right person for me? I’ve been wondering that for longer than I care to admit. The way he treats me isn’t what I want, and sometimes I realize I deserve better, but it’s going out and getting it that scares me.
The fear of being alone keeps me with the easy choice.
“Do you want to talk about it, Kat?” Josie’s question is gentle, gaze locked on mine. “You’ve got two great listeners right here, and we’ve both been through some shit when it comes to love.”
“I just . . .” I struggle to find the right words. “Have you ever looked at someone one day and just knew it was going to end?”
“God, yes,” Mia says with a snort. “My ex-girlfriend.”
“Same,” Josie admits. “With Bryce.”
“And technically, that one happened twice,” Mia points out.
My jaw drops open at the idea of Josie and Bryce ever being anything other than Josie and Bryce. The world’s most adorable couple had been split up? Multiple times! If it happened to them, what does that mean for the rest of the world? “What?” I gasp. “No way! You two are—”
“Not always perfect,” Josie cuts in. “We’re in a good place now, but it took a lot of work. God, it still takes a lot of work.”
“Have they always been disgustingly adorable?” Mia questions. “Yes, but it wasn’t the healthiest relationship, and they both had a lot of growing up to do.”
After giving Mia a look I can’t read, Josie continues, “The point is, the two of us knew we wanted to make it work, so we decided to fight for it. And we know it’ll always take work, so we continue to fight for it. That’s what you do when you want it to last.”
“It’s actually quite simple. If you’re wondering if you’d be better off without him, I think you already have your answer.”
I blink at Mia, who just made it sound so simple, but it’s never that simple.
“He’s not the only guy out there,” she continues, reading my thoughts. “I know what you’re thinking, Kat. He’s not the only man out there who can love you.”
My jaw drops open again. “ How ?”
Josie shrugs. “Don’t ask me. It’s her superpower, and I’ve learned to stop questioning it.”
Lips pursed, Mia pins me with a serious look. “You’re sitting here with two women who get it. We know media and society can fuck with our self-image and confidence. Women like us don’t get x, y, or z. For the most part, we know it’s bullshit, but every once in a while, that insecurity creeps in, and we believe it. But that doesn’t mean you have to stay with a shitty dude because he made you think he’s the only one who’ll want you.”
“Whoa.” I hold my hands up, trying to stop her. “He never said—”
She cuts off my lie before it can even leave my mouth, eyes narrowed into a glare. “Nope. No way. We are not making excuses for shitty men. I don’t care what he did or did not say. I can see it written all over your face. I’ve known you for a couple hours but can already tell you’re an intelligent, beautiful, badass woman. You don’t need him to validate who you are.”
I blink, an unexplainable surge of confidence welling up inside me. “Holy shit,” I breathe, “you should be a motivational speaker.”
She reaches for her margarita again, waving her hand as she takes a long drink. “Oh, absolutely not. I hate people far too much for that.”
I look at Josie, who’s smiling in amusement. “She’s not exaggerating. I think we’re two of maybe ten people she likes.”
“Ten is generous.” She peers at me again, looking calculating. “So, what are you going to do?”
I know better than to do anything about it right now. It’d be shitty of me to end a two-year relationship while I’m not in the same city as him. I need to use this time to think about it seriously, though. I need to figure out where I see us going. More importantly, I need to decide if I see him in my future, or if I even want to. If I’m using this time to prove myself—prove my worth and take charge of my life—that should be part of it, right?
“I guess I have a lot of thinking to do,” I admit, playing with the straw in my drink. “Figure out what I want to do.”
Sensing the shift in mood, Josie reaches over and squeezes my free hand. She’s smiling softly when I look up at her. “We’ll be here if you need to talk.”
I realize this is one of those magical moments where a friendship starts. Where it becomes real and you start to get comfortable around each other, opening up about things you’d never talked about before. Most of the time, I keep people at arm’s length, but I have the door open wide for these two. It’s scary to be vulnerable, but it’s freeing, too. Knowing I don’t have to carry everything on my own and that there are people out there who get it and want to help.
Now I just needed to trust that I deserve this. Friends who care about me for who I am rather than for what I can get them or do for them. A friendship I deserve.
“I know we haven’t gotten our food yet,” Josie declares, breaking the silence, “but please tell me we’re getting dessert.”
I laugh as Mia groans happily. “I’m down if you guys are.”
Mia reaches for the dessert menu. “If they don’t have ice cream, we’re going somewhere else.”
I watch as Mia tugs Josie across the parking lot to her car, both still giggling at whatever idiotic thing set us off. A smile is still on my face, but I’m not sure where it came from. It’d been forever since I had a night like this—full of laughter and good memories. We’d all only had a single drink, which was hours ago, but we’d bonded over childhood celebrity crushes (Am I the only one who remembers the live action Peter Pan from 2003?), and shared experiences of being considered fat women by society, and how others seemed convinced that the only way a woman can be healthy is to be thin.
My phone vibrates in my cupholder as I start my car; another text message from Will.
Answering or calling him would mean potentially ruining my good mood, which isn’t something I’m at all interested in. Ignoring him for long is also impossible. Which is why I’m dialing the number before I pull out of the parking spot, the sound of ringing overtaking the car.
Shockingly, he answers before the line can ring twice. “Why haven’t you texted me back?” His tone is demanding, dampening my mood. “I’ve been texting you for hours! What if something happened to you?”
“You knew I was out with friends, Will.” I roll my eyes, checking both directions as I pull out of the parking lot. The streets of Columbia are quiet at this late hour. “Why were you texting me that much when you knew I was busy? You’ve never texted me that much.”
“That is not true.”
“What?” I snort out a laugh. “Yes, it is.”
Even when we first started talking, we never texted that much. His focus was on work, never on our budding relationship. I was the one who would start and lead conversations, and not much has changed since we’ve been together. At least now, I know what to expect from him.
“What do you need, Will?”
“Why do you think I need something?” He was being repetitive in a condescending way, trying to act like the victim in this moment, but I’m too tired and happy to lean into it. “Maybe I just want to talk to my girlfriend. Is that a crime now or something?”
“You knew I was at dinner.” I stress my point, ignoring the acidic, nauseating way my stomach twists. A reminder of what I’d talked about only hours before. “You knew nothing was wrong.”
“Let me get this straight. You ignore your boyfriend when you’re with these friends?” I can see it unfolding—the way he’s going to turn this until I look like the bad guy. “That’s not like you. I’m not sure how I feel about you hanging out with people who make you think you have to choose.”
“Well then, it’s a good thing I don’t ask for your permission on who I can be friends with.”
I’ve never spoken back to him like that before, but it’s kind of invigorating. It’s not the first time I’ve thought about saying something like this to him, but it’s the first time I let the words come tumbling out. I don’t even care how mad it makes him; the strength I feel in this moment is empowering in a way I’ve never felt before.
“I don’t like this, Katrina,” Will warns, anger evident in his tone. “I don’t like what these women seem to be doing to you. They’re interfering in a relationship they know nothing about.”
I rub at my brow, lips pursed into a thin line. “They had nothing to do with me not texting you, Will. I haven’t told them much about you, if I’m being honest.”
That was apparently the worst thing to say. “Oh, so you don’t want to tell people we’re together? And you’re telling me to trust you?”
I groan, coming to a stop at a yellow light. “That’s not—”
“I don’t want to talk about it, Kat.” I can’t remember the last time he called me Kat. “I need to go. I’ll talk to you later.”
The car fills with silence for a second before music comes over the speakers to replace the call. Groaning, I laid my head down on the steering wheel, taking several deep breaths. Mia and Josie are right; I need to figure out what I want in life and whether it includes Will.
The light is barely green when someone behind me beeps their horn. I wave in apology as I accelerate, feeling more conflicted than I’ve felt in years.
The conversation with Mia and Josie rings in my ears, gently reminding me that I deserve to find someone who treats me right. Who doesn’t make me feel guilty about friendships and having a life of my own outside of a relationship. The more physical distance I put between myself and Will, the easier it feels to breathe. And shouldn’t that be the sign I’ve been looking for?
By the time I pull back into my rental, I’ve firmly made up my mind: the relationship has to end. Now I just have to figure out when that’ll happen.