Chapter 7 Monroe
MONROE
Karaoke night at the Rusty Spur was in full swing. Two young airmen were butchering “Sweet Caroline” on stage while the crowd’s voices and clinking glasses hummed beneath their off-key crooning.
Lila, Evelyn, and I sat in a booth tucked into a corner, chatting about the week we’d had and, in particular, Jace Callahan. He was the topic at the moment.
Evelyn, with her brown curls and warm smile, nursed a vodka tonic. “So you just walked away from him?”
I wiped the condensation from my glass of vodka and cranberry. “Yep. I feel awful. Ryan’s fiancée was there, and with the connection Jace and I had, I couldn’t deal. I panicked. I even told Jace I wasn’t ready to date.”
Sitting beside Evelyn, Lila studied me intently. Her lips were pursed so hard, I swore she was about to unleash her fury on me. “But you like Jace a lot. Stop torturing yourself.”
“I just met him. Besides, he’s military,” I shot back.
Both of my besties rolled their eyes.
Lila was about to speak until Evelyn held up her hand at Lila. “Look around, Monroe. Half of this town is military. You’ll be a lonely woman if you don’t take a chance, especially on a man you really like.”
The truth sat heavy in my chest as I toyed with the napkin, unable to meet their eyes. They knew me too well and could read me like a book.
“Okay, fine,” I admitted quietly. “I might like him too much. That’s the problem.” I inhaled a deep breath. “He almost kissed me in the school hallway.”
“Shut the front door,” Lila rushed out, her hazel eyes rimmed with thick mascara popping out. “You left that part out.”
I blushed. “I’m scared out of my mind.”
Evelyn reached over the table and placed her dainty hand on mine. “It’s normal to be scared. You’ve only been with one man. But you have to let go of that douchebag you were married to and allow yourself to feel again.”
I was feeling again. Maybe too much, too soon.
Jace was right. We had a connection. One that was so strong that I was sure it would ignite into an inferno if we even kissed.
I couldn’t imagine what would happen if we had sex.
I would probably fall hard and fast. Maybe I already was.
I couldn’t stop thinking about him. I kept replaying what he’d said to me.
“You also have needs, Monroe. Tell me you’re not wet under that dress. Tell me you don’t want my tongue teasing you, my body pressed against you, or dare I say, me inside you.”
OMG! My lady parts were so ready for him.
I took a gulp of my drink, my body heating, my mouth dry. “What if I get hurt again? I wouldn’t be able to handle that.”
Lila leaned in. “That’s a possibility, but you can’t let that stop you. Take a chance. See where it goes. Evelyn and I are here to cheer you on.”
“Yeah,” Evelyn said. “We’ll kick his ass if he hurts you.”
“I just love you two.”
I hated to think that I could be alone for the rest of my life if I didn’t take a chance. If I didn’t take my life back.
Though I wouldn’t even begin to know what to do with a man like Jace. It’s like riding a bike, girl. You never really forget. Except Jace seemed like the type of man who knew his way around a bedroom, and I was definitely rusty.
“Screw it.” I raised my glass. “Here’s to a new chapter. I’m ready.” Or I hoped I was ready and didn’t crash and fall.
We clinked glasses, and I downed the rest of my drink.
Maybe it was the vodka. Maybe it was the week from hell. But for the first time in two years, I didn’t want to think. I just wanted to feel anything but despair, anger, and hatred.
The two airmen finally finished the song. A weak round of applause boomed.
Lila and Evelyn exchanged an odd look.
“What are you two up to?” I asked as the din of voices lowered. “You did not call Jace, did you?”
Lila laughed. “No, but that would’ve been brilliant.”
The emcee’s voice filtered through the speakers. “And up next, we have Monroe singing ‘Colder Weather.’”
My jaw hit the scratched wooden table.
“When we walked in, we put your name on the list to sing,” Evelyn announced too darn proudly. “You haven’t sung since—”
“She caught Ryan with his tongue down a woman’s throat at Eagle’s Trail,” Lila finished for her. “The same lady he’s marrying, if I’m not mistaken.”
That was one of the reasons I refused to hike there anymore and why Lila and I had gone to Devil’s Hollow instead the other day.
Evelyn fake pouted. “You have a beautiful voice. Please.”
My mom had been in school and church choirs, and she would always sing while cleaning the house or at night when I forced her to play the piano and sing. Maybe tonight was the perfect time to give my past the proverbial finger.
“That song complements your voice,” Lila chimed in. “This place needs to hear something awesome after those two guys massacred ‘Sweet Caroline.’ And what better time to open that new chapter with a song.”
I puffed out my cheeks. “Fine. I’m only doing this because I hate to see Evelyn’s pouty face.”
“Liar,” Lila mumbled. “You love it up there.”
She wasn’t wrong.
I made my way to the stage, and someone whistled. Then another person in the crowd shouted, “We just love your voice, Monroe.”
Karaoke had been a way to have fun, but the girls and I hadn’t done it in a long time.
The first notes slipped through the speakers, soft and haunting, as I stepped up to the microphone, my stomach a storm of butterflies.
I swallowed, took in a breath, and started, keeping my eyes on a poster hanging on the wall in the distance.
My voice wavered on the first note until the melody seeped into my soul, then suddenly, the room faded as if it were just me and the microphone.
I closed my eyes, picturing my front porch on a balmy summer night.
Me strumming my guitar. Ethan tapping a tambourine, music spilling into the dark.
The lyrics weren’t sweet or forgiving but rather about emotional distance and the inability to settle down, which was par for the course being a former military wife.
Somewhere between the second verse and the bridge, I stopped thinking about where I was and belted out the words. As I sang the last chords, I glanced around the bar and almost faltered, more so when I spotted Jace. Suddenly, my nerves staged a coup.
He was watching me with that steady intensity, awe softening into a boyish grin. I smiled at him despite my heart jackhammering against my ribs.
Push through it. Don’t screw up now.
As the final note lingered, my voice trembled.
Finish strong.
I shook off the nerves, even though my legs felt like saltwater taffy. As if something clicked inside of me, I straightened, singing the last of the song like a pro, feeling like I was just reborn.
The crowd erupted in a standing ovation with applause and whistles. Lila and Evelyn were hooting and hollering.
“That’s my friend!” Evelyn shouted.
I was breathless, smiling and nodding at the crowd, feeling like I could conquer anything. I really needed this, and it couldn’t have come at a better time.
Jace placed a hand over his heart as he bowed his head in appreciation, awe, admiration.
I walked off stage, and people congratulated me.
“You were amazing,” a middle-aged woman said.
“Thank you” barely came out of my mouth when Jace sauntered over.
As if he lit a match, my body erupted in fire. He was wearing dark jeans that hugged his powerful thighs, flak boots, and a charcoal Henley that clung to his toned chest and fit too well for my sanity.
“Wow,” he said, leaning in to kiss me on the cheek. “You surprise me.”
“I have a lot of things in my arsenal,” I replied, silently scratching my head as to why that statement came out of me.
He chuckled, looking relaxed, unbuttoned from the stiff formality he’d exuded at Career Day. The air around him seemed to be calm yet charged, dangerous yet safe.
“I would like to find out what those other things are, Teach,” he whispered in my ear, his hot breath making me shiver in delight. “And you look beautiful. Your voice did things to me that would make a priest cower.”
Holy hell! If he started to tell me he wanted to be inside me, I might climb him like a monkey here and now.
I giggled, blushing like a high school girl as I placed my hand on his arm to steady myself.
“What brings you to the Rusty Spur?” I asked, my voice rough and wobbly.
His smirk was all kinds of sexy, deadly, and one that I would love to wake up to in the morning. “You.”
Once again, my cheeks were on fire, and my body burning with need. “Seriously.” I had to steer the conversation in another direction because I was seconds away from kissing him.
“I’m here with Dax and some of his buddies. By the way, is everything okay with you? The other day at school, you disappeared.”
I was about to apologize until a woman with sandy-blond hair and wearing glasses came up to us.
“Jace,” she said, “I hope you’ve been nursing that shoulder. And I see no sling.”
He clenched his jaw as if she was scolding him.
“Dana, surprised to see you at the Rusty Spur.” He kissed her on the cheek.
“Is this how you’re relaxing?” she asked, flashing her attention to me. “By the way, I caught the last few seconds of your song. Awesome voice.”
“Thank you.” I regarded Jace. “I need to return to my friends. Have a good night.”
I scurried off as jealousy hit me squarely between the eyes. I hadn’t felt like this since high school.
I slid into the booth, huffing and puffing. It took me a second to realize Lila wasn’t sitting beside Evelyn.
Evelyn set her phone on the table. “You were fantastic up on stage. I’m so proud of you. And Lila tells me that’s Jace.” She peeked around the booth. “Who’s the lady?”
I shrugged. “Dana. My luck, they’re together.”
I searched the bar for Lila and spotted her talking to Dax. The way she was flirting with him, I wouldn’t be surprised if she hooked up with him.
I stole a look at Jace and Dana. The two appeared to be arguing like a couple who’d been together for a while.
Lila returned, bubbly and excited. “Dax wants us to join them. He’s celebrating a friend’s birthday.” She sat beside me.
“I’m ready to leave,” I announced, not in the mood for any more surprises or partying.
Lila nudged me. “Didn’t you say you’re starting a new chapter? And after your stunning performance, we need to celebrate another milestone.”
“I’m in,” Evelyn said happily, prodding me with her eyes.
Sighing, I shrugged. I didn’t have much of a choice since Lila was my ride.
“What’s with the pouting?” Lila sounded like my mom.
“It’s the woman,” Evelyn answered.
Lila flipped her auburn hair over her shoulder. “Jace isn’t with her. According to Dax, she and Jace are good friends. She’s the military doctor who treated his shoulder injury. She runs the medical clinic on base.”
I still wanted to get out of there. The adrenaline was slowly dissipating, and I was ready to curl up on my couch by the fireplace. It was the first night I had to myself in a while, with Ethan staying with his dad this weekend.
“Look, Pine Valley won the football game tonight,” Evelyn said. “You’ve made a major life decision, you got up on stage, and the man you want is here, and I would bet he’s waiting for you to make the first move. After all, you left him hanging.”
“I do owe him an apology,” I said, more to convince myself as I inwardly berated myself for being jealous.
“Good. Then it’s settled.” Lila stood. “Maybe when you apologize, you can show him how sorry you are at your house.”
Suddenly, my moodiness was taking a turn as excitement sped through my veins at Lila’s idea.
I followed behind my friends, every step feeling as though I was walking into an alternate universe.
Dax’s table was rowdy as I stood next to Lila.
Immediately, Jace sidled up to me. “You were about to say something earlier before Dana interrupted us?”
Before I could answer him, Dax was introducing everyone.
I wasn’t exactly listening because Jace’s heat and how close he was to me were frying my brain cells.
Though one name stood out. Dax’s friend Crewe Hawthorne.
It was hard to forget a name like Crewe, which was all kinds of cool.
Not to mention, the dude was tall and broad with dark hair and dark eyes.
I was certain he could stop a train full of women with the flick of his fierce gaze.
Jace bowed his head, his lips near my ear. “Are you okay? You seem like you want to scream.”
I laughed like he’d told me the funniest joke.
“You should laugh more,” he said, placing a hand on my lower back.
My pulse kept time with the music pounding through the speakers, and I needed air. So before I thought too much about it, I raised up on my toes, turning my neck slightly, and said into his ear, “Want to get out of here?”
Where the courage came from, I wasn’t sure. What I did know was my body was calling to him.
The heat in his gaze said yes before he vocalized it.
Tonight, I wasn’t hiding from my past, from my divorce. It was time to do something for myself.