Chapter 18 #2
Niles and Dom knew why Asao pushed so hard for them to leave the past they’d once honored and lived by and never gave him grief.
If he stepped, they stepped. It paid off but he would never forget what it’d cost them.
Some days were hard because the money wasn’t there but they never slipped.
They’d made it to the other side together, as brothers.
Leedren was quiet for a minute and simply stared at his son.
After a long moment he smiled subtly. “I’m proud of you, Sao.
I’m proud of the man you are and the man I know you’re going to be.
” His expression was hard when he continued.
“Being here has cost me so much. I’m torn daily with the decision I made because protecting your mother meant being absent in your life.
That’s a fucked up space to exist in because the guilt is heavy. ”
“You don’t have anything to feel guilty about, Pops.”
“I do. I carry the guilt of not being there for you.”
“You’ve been there.”
“Not like I should have been. Raising a son behind bars isn’t honorable, Sao. It hurt me in ways I can’t even process, but I also know if I had the chance to do it all over again, I would make the same decision. I love your mother. I can’t and won’t apologize for the decision I made.”
Asao nodded and frowned at his father. They’d never had this conversation before. He understood his father’s struggle with being absent from his life, but today, something felt different.
“You good, Pops?”
“I’m good, son.”
“Then why are we talking about this?”
Leedren smiled and brushed a hand over his head.
The move mirrored the action of his son.
“Being here was hard. I left my heart on the outside. You and your mother but I gave you a choice to stay connected to me. I didn’t give her one because I wouldn’t have survived this time only having a piece of her. I know you may not understand—"
Asao cut him off. “I get it, Pops.”
Leedren was expressing that he didn’t love Asao any less than he loved his wife, only that the love he had for the two of them was different.
When Asao turned eighteen, he was allowed calls and communication from Leedren.
Prior to that he’d kept up with the moves his son made through his connections to the streets.
But his wife, he didn’t want to know anything other than she was alive and well.
No specifics or details. He couldn’t hear her voice, refused to see her face or read her words on paper.
It was selfish, but necessary. He’d written to her once a month, just to remind her of his love, and she’d kept them because not one was marked return to sender.
He never knew if she read them because that was the only choice he would allow her to make.
Their deal was he would write to her once a month.
She loved him enough to give him what he needed to survive the time attached to his name.
“You in love, Sao?” his father asked sternly. The only way his son could understand what he was saying was if a woman owned his heart.
Asao smirked and shook his head. “Nah, but I know what that looks like.”
I loved once but I fucked that up and lost her, Asao thought to himself.
Leedren nodded without asking for clarity.
“I’ll be home in two weeks.”
“Two weeks?” The date was locked in Asao’s memory.
He knew the month, day, year, and time. He had been counting down the days until he could hug his father outside of the correctional facility that held him captive.
Even with time served there was still six months left on his father’s sentence, so two weeks didn’t align.
“They had a mentorship program the warden agreed to in order to get more state funding. No one wanted to do it so he gave six months off your time to anyone who agreed. I signed up.”
“You’ve been mentoring people in here?” Asao grinned and his father nodded with a cocky smile.
“I know a little something, and even if your hardheaded ass never wants to listen to me, other people do.”
“I listen.”
Leedren glared at his son with a reminder that he’d begged Asao to walk a path other than the one he’d chosen but the streets became his home. Leedren was simply grateful that Asao’s life choices hadn’t landed him a cell next to his.
“I listen when it counts. So two weeks, that’s a done deal?”
“Yeah. Two weeks and I get to come home.”
“You ready for that?” Asao questioned his father with a neutral expression.
Leedren brushed a hand over his head. “Been a long time coming. Don’t tell your mother, aight?”
“Why not?” Asao frowned.
“It’s probably best if I don’t give her time to think about it.”
Asao stared at his father, now understanding where the conversation about his past had come from.
“Ah shit, your ass is nervous about coming home to your wife,” Asao said with a smile.
“I’m not nervous. It’s just been a long time and a lot of shit has changed.”
“Not with y’all though. She loves you, Pop. She might not like how you handled things but she understands. She wants you home.”
Leedren nodded. “Maybe, just don’t tell her.”
“Aight, I got you.”
They spent the rest of their visit catching up. Asao promised to be there to get his father the day of his release. When he made it to his car, prepared to make the three-hour drive back to Crescent Falls, Asao’s heart was lighter. His father was coming home…
“I can’t believe your man owns Cap’s place.
” Samari watched her girl walking around the open space they had frequented multiple times over the years.
The entire building looked different because of the fresh paint, new furniture, and expensive studios that replaced the old one.
But the memories were ingrained in both of their minds.
“I don’t have a man.” Samari kissed her godbaby’s fat cheeks while she frowned at the toy phone in Jomie’s hands. She gripped it between both, attempting to press buttons, mocking the act of making a call before she placed it to the side of her face and babbled away like she was talking to someone.
The toddler’s actions brought a smile to Samari’s face because there was no way to look at the pretty brown beauty and not smile.
“Did he make you cum today?” Samari kept her eyes on Jomie when she rolled them.
“Sex is not a commitment, friend.”
“True but signing you to a new label while making sure to get you away from the label that fucked you over is definitely boyfriend material.” Samari glanced at the doors to Track Killaz where Dom was saying goodbye to the two women who had been occupying his time after he’d worked with two of the younger artists who’d recently joined the Track Killaz team.
“I feel like I’m being reckless with my career,” Samari admitted.
“But?” Sheree questioned.
Samari grinned because her girl could read her like a book. “But I like him and this feels good.”
“Then why are you trying to act like that’s not your man?”
“Because I want both him and this.” Samari looked around the studio.
“Okay and what’s the problem?”
“Industry shit never works. There’s too much pressure to be what the world expects you to be.”
“Then keep people out of your business,” Sheree said, as if it just made sense.
Her life was simple. Her world was centered around her husband and daughter.
She hadn’t experienced a life where people were constantly shoving a camera or microphone in her face just to get a clip or soundbite.
One they planned on twisting and manipulating to be what they wanted.
Samari had. Not just with her career but with her personal life as well.
She barely had half the status of Asao, so she could only imagine how being attached to him would feel.
“That never works, and the minute they think they have a story, they’ll run with it. Even if there’s not one, they’ll make up one.”
“People are going to talk. You already know that and who the hell cares what they make up as long as you don’t buy into it. You deserve this…” Sheree pointed to the soundboard. “And him. Don’t forget we have a plan. Jomie needs a best friend, so I’m going to need you to be pregnant very soon.”
“Bruh, are you in here trying to get Samari to trap my boy with a baby?” Dom’s animated voice had Samari and Sheree turning toward the entrance, watching as he smoothly crossed the room, tugging at his jeans.
The smug grin on his face enhanced his handsome features—mocha skin, Caesar cut, low-set eyes, and dimpled smile.
He was attractive, had a chill personality, but was definitely a hoe, which dismissed any interest most women would have ever considered.
When they’d arrived at the studio, Samari and Sheree were privy to the sounds of him receiving head from one of the women he had just escorted from the building. Although he was in the room built out to be the sleeping quarters, Dom’s instructions were loud and clear.
His commands of ‘”suck that shit”, “you better swallow”, and “stop fucking playing” had Samari and Sheree rolling their eyes with their mouths dropped because they could tell the woman was a good listener based on the responses she provided.
When Dom finished and walked out of the room with not one but two women, all they could do was look at each other and shake their heads.
“You can’t trap a man who’s willingly handing over his future babies,” Sheree said with a shrug.
“Are you telling on yourself?” He stopped in front of Samari and reached for Jomie who scrunched her tiny face and leaned away from him, snuggling into Samari’s chest.
“That’s what’s up, lil bit. You passed the test.” He brushed a finger down her nose and walked to the soundboard and sat.
“Did you wash your hands?” Samari arched a brow his way and he turned his back to the soundboard and nodded.
“Why are you worried about my hands?” He grinned and she deadpanned Dom, whose smile expanded.
“My hands weren’t involved. Just her mouth and my—”