Chapter 10
ANGELA
On Sunday, I stayed home with Ayla, cleaning and organizing the house for the holidays. When she went to bed, I wrapped the presents. I told my parents I wasn't coming home to see them because of the store. I hadn't bothered to tell them that it was closed.
I didn't have the money to fly to see them, and I didn't want to admit that to them. They'd always assumed I wasn't capable of supporting myself. They offered to support me after the divorce, but I wanted to prove that I could do this on my own.
They felt that working for a company was more stable for a single mom. Opening a business was a risky proposition. I wanted to prove them wrong. I was going to do everything I knew how to do to sell my products.
When the first cha-ching came through my phone, I jumped. I'd sold something? I quickly opened my phone and navigated to my email. I'd sold a set of six holiday panties. I needed to pack and ship them out first thing tomorrow.
But first, I had to share the news with someone. I scrolled through my recent contacts. I didn't want to tell my parents I'd opened an online store; they'd want to know why I'd need to do that. And they wouldn't understand.
I could tell the women from the shops. They'd added me to their group message chain. But something had my finger hovering over Hudson's number.
I pressed his name to send a text.
Angela: I got my first sale!
I hit Send before I could second guess myself. Then I focused on cutting wrapping paper for the next gift when my phone buzzed with an incoming message.
Hudson: That's amazing! What did you sell?
I couldn't imagine he was actually interested. He was just being nice.
Angela: A pack of holiday-themed panties.
It was hard enough to type panties; I wasn't going to tell him they were actually thongs.
Hudson called, causing me to fumble and drop the phone. By the time I recovered, it was on the last ring. "Sorry. I dropped the phone."
"I surprised you."
"Yes. No." Why did I sound so out of breath? This was Hudson. The man working on my shop. He wasn't a love interest. Even if I was attracted to him, he certainly wasn't interested in me.
He chuckled, and the sound reverberated through my body. "I just wanted to congratulate you. Your first sale is a big deal."
I cradled the phone against my ear. "I've sold things before."
"Yeah, but this is different. You've significantly increased your reach with an online store. There are no limits to what you can do."
I gripped the phone tighter, not wanting to put it on speaker phone because Ayla was sleeping. "I hope so. I could use something positive right now."
"You're selling your products in Belle's store and now this. The shop being closed hasn't slowed you down at all."
I let out a shaky breath. "It's so scary to try new things. I was sure that people would complain about panties being in Belle's store."
He cleared his throat. "I'm not sure I'm comfortable discussing panties with you. Hopefully, Bill doesn't say anything."
I sighed. "He thinks all change is bad, and he wants everyone to be as miserable as him."
Hudson was quiet for a second and then said, "I haven't heard you say anything negative about anyone."
I bit my lip. "Bill is difficult."
"But you can handle him." I heard the smile in his voice.
"I can." It felt good to have his support.
"But you shouldn't have to."
It was intimate talking to Hudson on the phone. The house was dark and quiet. It was just him and me.
"Did you ever get a tree?" His deep voice resonated in my chest.
I looked at our mini artificial one that was on a small table by the fireplace, feeling guilty I hadn't tried harder to make Ayla's Christmas special. "No."
"I'll drop one off tomorrow. I'm sure Ayla wants to pick one out herself, but it's kind of last minute. Besides, there's something else I want to show you."
"Oh, yeah. What's that?" Was my voice low and flirty?
"Ah, ah, ah. It's a surprise."
I laughed. "Why are you surprising me?"
"I want to say it's for Ayla, but I have a feeling you'll both love this."
"Now you have me intrigued." My mind was racing with the possibilities, but I couldn't settle on one.
"You'll just have to wait and see," he said cryptically.
I smiled. "What if I don't like surprises?"
"Mmm. But Ayla does."
"And how do you know that?" I asked, enjoying this back-and-forth.
"She just seems like the kind of kid who would appreciate one."
It was nice that he'd thought about Ayla.
"What are your plans for the holidays? Are you going to be home?"
"Yes. Gus gets Ayla on the weekend."
"You get the whole holiday with her?"
"Gus willingly gives me the holidays, which is nice, but at some point, Ayla might wonder why she spends all of them with her mother. Why not her father?"
"And why is that?"
"I don't know. Holidays come with too many expectations, and he doesn't want to fulfill them. It's easier being the evening or the weekend dad. No one expects anything from you. Now, if he starts dating someone, that might change." I yawned, the late hour getting to me.
"I should let you get to bed."
"I'm wrapping presents while she's asleep. I don't want to wait and do everything on Christmas Eve."
"You make the magic happen for your daughter," he said quietly, as if he'd just come to that conclusion.
"I guess you could describe it that way."
"That makes you amazing in my book."
That hit me in the breastbone. "I always feel like I am failing at this single-parent thing."
"I doubt that Ayla has any complaints."
"Just wait until she's a teenager. I've heard it's nothing but complaints."
"Yeah, but she'll come around. That's how my sister, Aspen, was. Around tenth grade, she chilled out, and we all breathed a collective sigh of relief."
"I can see a bunch of older brothers walking on eggshells, afraid to set their teenage sister off," I mused.
"You can't see me, but I'm shuddering at the memory of it.
She was scary. Especially to a group of guys who had no idea how to handle the emotional outbursts.
She'd explode, and then walk out of the house, telling us she was going to run away.
Mom would direct one of us to follow her and make sure she was safe.
The key was not letting her know we were following her. "
"That's actually sweet. Her older brothers were taking care of her from afar but giving her the space she needed to feel all her emotions."
"I guess? We didn't think of it like that at the time. We were afraid of her, even though she was smaller. My brothers and I would take our aggression out on each other with fists and wrestling. But Aspen handled it differently, and boy, could she yell."
"I wonder if the walks helped her get the aggression out."
"Yeah, maybe."
"Aspen's come into my shop a few times. She's really nice."
"I don't want to know why my sister was in your shop, so I'm covering my ears. La la la."
I laughed. "Really? What are you, twelve?"
"I don't want to know what my sister wears under her clothes or if she's dating anyone seriously. We give her a hard time, but we wouldn't really interfere in her love life."
"She's never said anything to me about a guy. Sometimes that comes up. You know, why they're shopping for lingerie. Sometimes, they've just met someone, but most of the time, they enjoy wearing nice things."
"I don't want to think about my sister wearing something like I saw you wearing to entice a guy. Now I need to scrub my brain from that mental image."
"Are you going to keep bringing that up?" I asked.
He chuckled, low and deep. "I can't forget it."
"I wish you would," I said, even as I felt flattered that he couldn't get me out of his mind.
"It was the single hottest thing I've seen in a long time. I don't think I'll ever forget it."
I was at a loss for what to say. He found me attractive?
He didn't want to forget it? For so long, I felt like a frumpy mother.
I'd lost a part of myself when I got pregnant, the fun easy going one that went out whenever she wanted.
And even if I looked the same on the outside after I lost the pregnancy weight, I felt different.
I couldn't just go out on a whim, or hook up with a guy for fun.
I had responsibilities, and they made me feel boring and undesirable.
I'm sure my husband's interest waning over time didn't help either.
"You don't have anything to say to that?"
I opened and closed my mouth and finally managed, "I don't know what to say. Thank you?"
"You were sexy as hell in that little getup, and the way you were sitting on that chaise—hottest thing ever."
He was saying that I was attractive. That he wanted me. Was it because we were on the phone, and we couldn't see each other? How would he feel in the morning?
Then he cleared his throat. "I don't know why I'm talking about this. It must be the late hour and the intimacy of a phone call. I can't see you or your reaction. And I shouldn't be talking to you this way at all. You're my client."
"Eve is your client," I corrected.
"True."
"Are you still coming over tomorrow with the surprise?" I asked weakly, feeling like I'd bungled this entire conversation. He'd claimed that I was sexy, but not that he wanted to do anything about it. What was I supposed to do with that?
"Of course. Speaking of which, I need to call my brothers because I'm going to need their help."
Was it just an excuse to get off the phone with me? Had he said something he hadn't meant? "Have a good night."
"Oh, I will. See you tomorrow, Angela."
I liked the sound of my name on his lips. His send-off seemed like a promise. There was a part of me that wanted him to say that he wanted me and couldn't wait another day to have me. But I was scared for him to say that too. Was I ready to date someone?
But that kind of declaration was something you read about in romance books. It wasn't my reality. Not as a single mom. I had to plan everything. It wasn't like he could just show up here and have his way with me.
There was no hot-and-dirty sex in my future. Even if Hudson made me long for it with him.
When I wrapped the last present, I hid them in my closet and fell asleep thinking about him watching me in lingerie. I remembered the heat in his eyes as a physical caress on my bare skin.
In my dreams, Wynter wasn't there. It was just Hudson, and he braced one hand on the back of the chaise and another on the side of my head. He leaned in, and said, "I want you."
All I could do was nod, because I wanted him too. He cupped my jaw, then kissed me. It was the most delicious dream. I never wanted to wake up.
The bed bounced, and I opened my eyes. Ayla was jumping on the bed. I wanted to cry because she'd interrupted the best part of the dream. Was Hudson dreaming about me too?
"What are we doing today?" Ayla said, still bouncing on her knees.
"I'm not exactly awake yet. But I think Hudson's coming over today with a surprise."
She stilled, her eyes wide. "A surprise?"
"Yes."
She tipped her head. "What kind of a surprise?"
"The kind you don't know about?" I teased.
She rolled her eyes. "It's always the kind you don't know about. That's what makes it a surprise."
"You want breakfast before he comes over?" I asked to distract her.
She stilled. "When will he be here?"
"He didn't say when. I'm going to take a shower, and then I'll make waffles."
"Yum. Can I watch TV?"
"Sure." I didn't allow it all the time. But it was holiday break, and I needed to shower before Hudson came over. Especially since the image he kept in his head of me was when I'd worn lingerie and had my hair and makeup done.
How could I live up to that image when I was a single mom? That photo shoot was pure fantasy. Although I had to admit the image was amazing on the home page of my shop. I looked like a woman who could conquer the world, and I wouldn't let motherhood stop me from being with a hot guy.
I jumped in the shower, trying not to think about that sexy dream. I rushed through washing my hair and body. Then dried off and spent too much time picking out a soft sweater and a pair of jeans that looked good on my butt.
In the kitchen, I mixed the batter and cooked a Belgian waffle for us to share. Then I pulled out whipped cream from the fridge and cut up berries.
"Waffle's ready," I called to Ayla.
We sat at the counter, eating together.
"What's Hudson's surprise?" she said between mouthfuls.
"He didn't say."
Her face screwed up. "I'm not sure I like surprises anymore."
I nodded. "Waiting is hard."
"It feels a little like Christmas."
It was funny because I didn't get the Christmas-morning feeling anymore. Not since I was an adult. It was nice to feel excited about something.
I heard an engine in the driveway and turned to find a Sterling Brothers truck parking. "Run and get dressed."
For once, Ayla complied without dallying.
I cleaned up the mess in the kitchen and opened the door when Hudson knocked. "You're here early."
"We have a lot to do today," Hudson said with a smile.
One of his brothers carried a tree behind him, so I moved out of their way.
"Where do you want it?" Maverick asked gruffly.
"In front of the windows." I'd cleared a space for it last night.
"I brought a stand in case you didn't have one." Hudson followed him into the room, and they got to work setting it up. The room already smelled like pine. Now it felt like Christmas.
My tiny artificial tree didn't have the same ambiance. In fact, it looked a little sad next to the real one.
They'd just gotten the tree straight when I heard footsteps on the stairs. Ayla ran into the living room and skidded to a stop in front of the tree. "A real tree?"
"You wanted one, yes?" Hudson asked, and Ayla nodded.
"You want to help us decorate it? Clara gave us ornaments."
Ayla nodded eagerly. "Is this the surprise?"
"One of the surprises."
One? I raised a brow at Hudson, but he just winked at me. He was having fun surprising Ayla, and I didn't want to ruin the moment by asking what he was planning.
Morgan and Maverick carried boxes in. "This is everything, the lights and ornaments."
"Thanks," Hudson said.
"Thanks for bringing the tree," I said to them as they passed.
"It was all Hudson's doing," Morgan called over his shoulder.
Hudson rubbed his hands together. "Now let's get this tree decorated."
My heart squeezed. It was a nice gesture, but what did it mean?