47. Sunsets
Sunsets
Bending over, I inhaled the scent of the pink roses that decorated the bushes in the Buccinis’ private gardens and waited for my father.
The last time I saw him was in the hospital when they woke him from his medically-induced coma and filled him in on what had happened.
It was a lot for him to process, but none of it was a major surprise to him, except the fact that I was related to an Irish mob leader and that my mother’s death hadn’t been an accident.
That really knocked the air out of his lungs.
He had no idea about her past, only the same story she had told me; she ran away from home as a teenager because she didn’t get on with her family, and they weren’t good people. That she preferred to leave the past behind. However, the past always seemed to catch up with the present.
“Luce mia.”
I turned when I heard his emotional voice and smiled.
He hobbled towards me, taking his time because he was still healing from his injuries.
For the first time in a long while, I wasn’t seeing him in an immaculate suit or formal attire.
A white cotton shirt hung loosely around his torso, and brown shorts revealed his lower legs and trainers.
It took years off him and made him seem lighter, yet somehow smaller.
Like he was just a man. Just a father. Not the mayor of Italy’s capital.
“Papi.” I closed the gap between us and hesitated before embracing him gently, trying not to cause any unnecessary pain. He placed his hand on my shoulder and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
“How was the flight?” I asked as we strolled over to a nearby bench.
From the moment he was discharged from hospital, Sani had his men guarding my papi every minute of the day, just in case Sean made any moves to take him hostage in exchange for me.
He’d done the same with Allegra too, who hadn’t stopped sending me voice notes and texting me with long, heartfelt apologies for allowing Callum to blackmail her.
It wasn’t necessary. I didn’t blame her for protecting her parents.
How could I hold that over her? She was protecting her family, just as I would have protected mine.
When I told my papi I wouldn’t be returning to Rome any time soon, he suggested he’d fly over to see me. Apparently, he had some things to say that couldn’t be said over the phone.
“Oh, good,” he said, looking around at the immaculate lawns. “The Buccinis’ private jet was luxurious and beautiful, just like their garden.”
I smiled, sensing the uncomfortable conversation brewing. I’d married a criminal, the very man my father wanted to bring down, and I wasn’t going to be getting a divorce. What did that mean for our relationship? For his campaign? I had no idea.
“Not a bad place to stay hidden, eh?” he joked, but the tense atmosphere didn’t thaw. “I hate to admit it, but the Buccinis will be better at keeping you safe than I will. But if this isn’t what you want, Arianna, tell me now and we’ll figure it out.”
I sighed and turned to face him. “I’m not going to leave him, Papi.”
He exhaled and stared at the roses.
“I love him, and there is nothing you can say that will change that. I know who he is and what he does. I know he’s not the man you envisioned your daughter marrying, but for the first time in my life, I feel like I am exactly where I am meant to be. He feels like home.”
His head had started bobbing as I spoke.
“I know,” he breathed and reached across to pat my hand on the bench.
“I know you love him. And no,” he chuckled.
“He is not who I hoped you would end up with. I’ll never be okay with what he does for a living, but…
if he keeps you safe, makes you happy and loves you fiercely, how can a father not be okay with that? ”
I pressed my lips together in a tight smile. It wasn’t glowing acceptance, but it was something.
“You know…” He leaned back on the bench and looked up at the cloudless, blue sky. “I almost died, and all I could think about in those moments before I lost consciousness was how much regret I had. I failed you, Arianna.”
I frowned. “Papi, no. You haven’t—”
“I did.” He raised his hand to stop me from arguing.
“I need to say this, Aria. Something I should have said years ago, and it has haunted me ever since.” I waited in anticipation as he pressed his thumbs into his forehead and closed his eyes.
“I’m sorry I wasn’t around for much of your childhood.
I made a mistake. I loved your mother very much.
She was the love of my life. The only love I’ve ever had, actually, aside from you.
” He reached for my hand and held it between his palms. “I was fresh out of university when I met her, and my goals and ambitions in life were solely focused on politics. Your mother was the exact opposite of me in every way. Wild, free-spirited, and feisty. She wanted to travel the world, experience everything life had to offer. I kept promising her I’d take her everywhere, but then…
life got in the way. My career started taking off, and we had you, so we stayed in Rome.
But your mother grew restless and anxious.
She wanted to leave, and I kept promising her a few more months.
A few months became a year, and then another.
Until one day I told her the dream was to one day run for mayor, and in order to achieve that, I needed to stay put.
She begged me to choose her. To choose you.
And I begged her to choose me. To stay in Italy and support my dreams. A week later, she packed her bags and took you with her.
And I didn’t go after you both. I should have. ”
“You didn’t understand why she was always running. She could have explained, but she chose not to. You’re not the only one to blame for your separation.”
He shook his head. “I’d like to say that if I’d have known why and who she was running from, it would have changed things, but honestly, I don’t know what I would have done with that information.
Maybe she saw that in me. I loved duty, politics, and built my life around being needed by a city.
When really, I was needed as a husband and father.
” His eyes shone with unshed tears as he looked at me.
“I’m so sorry, Aria. I keep thinking about what I could have done differently.
You needed a father, not a public figure.
After Quinn left me, I figured I had to make my dreams of being mayor come true because what else did I have?
Then after she died, I buried myself in office and control instead of grieving for a woman I still loved very much.
And I should have done a better job at being there for you in a way that was more than just a physical presence in your life. ”
“It’s okay, Papi.”
“It’s not.” He lowered his head and sighed. “It’s not. But I want to change. I’m going to resign as mayor.”
My eyes widened as the words I never thought my father would ever be capable of saying spilled from his mouth.
“What? Papi, you can’t! You worked so hard for this. Is this because of me being married to Sani?”
He laughed. “Well, it does make things rather difficult, but no, that is not the only reason. I’ll forever be in debt to the Buccinis for keeping you safe and handling this Sean character in a way I never could, but I cannot compromise my morals and agree to partner with them illegally. However, it’s bigger than that.”
He pulled out a plane ticket from his pocket.
“I nearly died, Aria, and I realised as my life flashed before my eyes that all it was made up of was work. I’ve never even left Italy, but I’ve always wanted to.
Santino thinks it’s best if I leave the country until Sean is dealt with, so I can’t be used against you.
But it feels like I am abandoning you all over again. ”
“You’re not! I know you’re not. Santino is right, Papi. It’s safer for both of us if you disappear for a while. And you deserve to see the world like you and Mum talked about.”
“I’ll travel to all the places she wanted to see and take her with me,” he said, placing his hand on his chest. Tears slid down my cheeks as I smiled.
“I would love it if you would come with me, but I know the safest place for you right now is here. But I promise, one day we will go on a trip together. If you’d like that. ”
I wrapped my arms around his neck and squeezed him. He hugged me back just as tightly when I muttered, “I’d really like that.”
After Papi left, I took a walk around the sprawling grounds of the Buccini mansion, trying to get familiar with my temporary home.
Besides the lovely landscaping, there was a stunning swimming pool with outdoor seating and a BBQ area, two tennis courts, stables and horses at the far end, and an impressive botanic garden sheltered behind a smaller wooden building that looked like an art studio.
If it wasn’t for the strange, intimidating statues of armed men scattered around, I’d have felt like I was on holiday at a five-star resort.
Pushing open the gate to the botanical garden, I wandered around and admired the wide variety of plants and trees until I heard voices coming from behind the large water feature.
“If you agree, Alessio will feel better about making this decision despite how everyone else feels,” Raya said in a pleading tone.
“It goes against your papi’s wishes,” Cecilia replied sharply. “He will never agree, and I won’t go against him.”
Raya sighed. A silence fell. Cecilia was once again confusing timelines, believing Vincenzo was still alive. I paused, uncertain whether I should slip back out or make myself known.
“Mamma,” Raya said softly. “I need you to support me in this.”
“You should marry for love.”
I couldn’t agree more. Raya shouldn’t have to do this. The last thing I wanted was for any of this family to sacrifice themselves to keep me safe from Sean McKenna.