Chapter 11
This is getting beyond a joke. It’s been two weeks, two weeks since I gave him a chance, and he’s still withholding sex .
. . it is driving me insane. I'm horny for him, I'm going to burst. I've tried the vibrator route when in bed, but having had the real thing and knowing what it feels like, the vibrator just leaves me disappointed after a lacklustre orgasm. So, tonight’s the night, I'm taking matters into my own hands!
We’ve seen each other every day, and things couldn’t be going any better in every other way.
I understand why he's holding off on the sex, to prove to me that it’s real, but I know it’s real by now.
I'm happy I backed down and gave him a chance. He’s funny, kind, charming, and sexy.
He makes me laugh; I've never laughed so much. We click. We’ve been everywhere – the cinema, for meals, and we’ve spent time together as a family.
I've gotten to know Lucia well, and she’s such a lovely little girl.
He still hasn’t told me much about her mum yet, that’s still a taboo subject, but Nathan has done a brilliant job bringing her up - she’s well-mannered and sweet.
I couldn’t have picked a better friend for Jess.
He’s altered his arrangements with his parents so that they have Lucia at the same time Pat has Jess on the weekend. Instead of his parents having her every Saturday night, they now have her every other weekend, on Friday and Saturday nights, so we can have alone time.
Last weekend, when we were child-free, it was great waking up together on Saturday morning.
He woke me up early, made me come with his hands and his mouth, and I returned the favour.
He told me we were going to Blackpool for the day.
We got the train and went to a few pubs for drinks, and the sun was shining.
We had such a great time. I felt guilty for not taking the girls, but he promised me that we would bring them back there in a few weeks.
I've fallen for him, hook, line, and sinker. I knew I would when I gave him a chance - that’s why I was reluctant.
I knew that he would have total control over my feelings.
I was right, I'm a gonner. He’s on my mind constantly.
When I get a text from him, I get a warm, fuzzy feeling from seeing his name on my phone.
See? Gonner. I’m sure he has feelings for me too - the way he looks at me sometimes - it’s like he only sees me and no one else.
Whatever his feelings are for me, I can't help but be head over heels in love with him already. It’s scary, but it feels great at the same time.
. . only time will tell if he feels the same way.
So... back to NO sex. It is driving me crazy. I know he wants me, that is something you can’t hide! We’ve fooled around plenty, but he holds back. He’s proved his point now – he wants me for more than sex, I get it – now give it up already!
I need him… need him inside me. I know how good it is, and I want that feeling again - I want that connection with him.
He’s pushed me too far now, I'm attacking him tonight!
I've gone all out with a cunning plan. It's Friday night, and Jess’s dad has picked her up.
I've bought sexy underwear and a nightie, and I've lit lots of candles around the room to create the mood.
I've put on soft music and have made a casserole in the slow cooker for later. He thinks he’s coming for dinner and a DVD, but he is not… tonight I pounce!
I've done my hair, put on a little makeup but keeping it mostly natural – everything has been shaved and I mean everything .
. . totally bare, see if that sparks a reaction, and now I'm in my sexy black thong with a negligee that stops at the top of my thigh with black lace edging, its sheer so that you can see through it and the part that coves my breasts is lace so you can see my nipples through it.
I've put on my highest ‘fuck me’ heels I can find. If this doesn’t work, nothing will.
By now, I would have gotten a complex that he didn't want to have sex with me, but he has a rock-hard erection pretty much all the time we’re alone.
I'm done with him respecting me now – I want him to be bad.
I've closed the curtains and I'm sitting on the couch with my feet up, crossed at the ankles, waiting for him to come in.
I'm turned on already, with anticipation alone.
I'm expecting him, but I still jump out of my skin when the door goes. When he enters the living room, he stops dead in his tracks and stares at me.
“Hi, honey . . . you’re home.” I say to him in a sing-song voice inwardly, nervously, wondering if I've got the guts to go through with this.
His mouth falls open as I stand up, and he takes me in from head to toe. Then, he looks around the dimly lit room, with candles lit, as if he’s just landed on another planet.
“So…” I start, glad right about now that I’d had a drink for courage. “I'm tired of you respecting me, and I want you to fuck me now.” His eyes snap back to mine. He still hasn’t said a word.
“You want me to fuck you?” he asks, his voice barely audible.
“If you can manage that, honey?” I say sweetly.
He strides to me and stops about six inches away, still not touching me.
He swallows. “I have never seen anything so fucking beautiful in all my life. I am one lucky bastard. Just so you know, Kate, I will never forget that I'm a lucky bastard . . . ever.”
He slowly brushes my breast with his fingers, making my nipple immediately rise to a stiff peak. I take in a sharp breath and look at him. My eyes are half-closed with lust.
“I never want to forget this image right now - sexy as hell in this outfit, and that look on your face that says you want me inside you.”
“I do . . . I want you inside me now, I can’t wait any longer . . . you’ve proved your point.”
He hooks under my legs and lifts me, carrying me upstairs, “This first time is going to be hard and it’s probably going to be quick, but then I've got all night to take my time with you.”
He enters my room and lays me on the bed.
I hope he realises the significance of us doing this at my house - every time we’ve spent the night together, we’ve done it at his place, I haven’t wanted to do that at my house until I was sure, it’s mine and Jessica’s space - I didn’t want him in it if he wasn’t a permanent fixture.
Still, I'm done being scared. I want him as a permanent fixture.
I lean up on my elbows to watch him undress as he peels off his t-shirt, unfastens his belt and jeans, and pushes them down.
He kicks his shoes off with his socks and discards his jeans.
He’s stood before me naked . . . rock hard .
. . beautiful. I have never said that about a man, but standing before me now, he is beautiful.
“You’re leaving this on while I fuck you . . . you’re only losing the knickers.” He says his voice is gruff.
I nod and gulp, shivering with anticipation, my body burning for him to touch it.
He lowers himself on top of me and presses his erection into my groin, lowering his head to take my nipple in his mouth, through my nightdress.
“Fuck . . . I want you so much. Are you sure about this?”
“Nate, if you don’t do it now, I swear to God I'm going to dump you!”
He laughs throatily and slides his hand inside my knickers. He inserts two fingers in me, and his eyes widen, “You’re dripping wet already.”
“You’ve made me wait weeks,” I whisper, my cheeks burning. There is pressure and then a snap, he’s ripped my knickers off and discarded them, before I have time to protest about my new underwear, his cock at my opening, just there... teasing me, my torn underwear forgotten.
He bends to kiss me hard, passionately. I return the kiss with urgency, my tongue meeting his, grabbing on the back of his head to pull him into me.
I widen my legs and wrap them around him.
The edge of his erection nudges at my opening, I lift my bottom off the bed to welcome his weight, and he surges into me quickly, filling me to the hilt. He’s so big.
“Oh hell, Nate… ahhhh… YES! That feels so good!”
His hips are still, he’s just inside me, filling me, not moving. His eyes are closed. I wiggle my hips and clench around him, trying to get him to move - he’s driving me crazy.
“Shit... Kate... I'm gonna come if you keep that up, I... I just need a minute.”
I smile. The normally so-controlled Nate is nearly losing it.
He opens his eyes, and my breath hitches at what I see. They are dark with lust, but there is a soft look of love there, too. I can see it.
“I love you, Kate. I love you so fucking much. I know it's too soon to say that, but it's how I feel.”
He takes my breath away. “I love you too, Nathan.”
Happiness radiates from him, and he moves out of me slowly and glides back in quickly.
I press my head back into the pillow, “Oh yes... harder.”
He does as I ask and rams into me harder. I wrap my legs around him tighter, trying to draw him further into me.
He does it again and again, harder each time . . . filling me, he bends to bite my nipple through the material again and I shatter . . . I come, clenching him tight as I do.
“Babe, I can feel you coming.” He groans loudly, and he comes inside me. He moves in and out of me slowly as I come out of the haze of my orgasm. He props himself up on his elbows, still inside me, and strokes the hair back off my face.
“Wow!” I say breathlessly, “That’s more like it.”
“What do you mean?” his brows furrowing into a frown.
“My own, do-it-yourself orgasms do not come close to that one.” I can't believe I blurted that out.
“What?” he rasps
“I mean… well… you made me wait for ages, and I was turned on.”
“You’ve been touching yourself? Thinking about me?”
I smack his shoulder lightly. “Of course I was thinking about you, and yes, touching myself, but I have help too.” I smile bashfully at him.
“What kind of help?”
“I have a vibrator... single girl, and all that. A girl has needs.”
“Fuck. I swear I'm getting hard again, and I'm still inside you. You gonna show me?”
“What? No way!”
“Hmm... we’ll see about that. I meant it, you know, I'm in love with you, babe, you’re all I think about . . . you own me.”
I own him.
At this moment, I've never been so happy apart from the day I gave birth to Jessica.
I cup his face in my hand and trace his eyebrow with my thumb.
“When I first met you and I had a crush on you, I thought I had true feelings for you - I realise now that I didn’t even know you.
Now that I've gotten to know you, I'm so head over heels in love with you that I can’t think of anything else. I'm so happy.”
He slides out of me and eases himself off me “I hate that we wasted all this time because I was such a dickhead.”
I shake my head, “You can't say that - we wouldn’t have Jess and Lucia – and I wouldn’t change that for anything, these things happen for a reason.”
He shrugs, “Yeah, you're right. Still, we have a lot of time to make up for, not mentioning the fact that for the past fortnight I've had a constant hard-on every time I thought of you. I'm going to make love to you now, then I'm going to fuck you, then we’re going to get you cleaned up so that I can eat you in the shower, when we get out your gonna go down on me, and then you’re gonna show me what you do with your power tools” My mouth drops open, “and I'm going to make love to you again. Once that’s done, we’ll do it all over again.”
My eyes widen at the thought, and he chuckles - I won’t be walking anywhere tomorrow.
He holds my hips and pulls me on top of him so that I'm straddling him. I reach and pull the gown off over my head and throw it to the floor as he guides himself into me, ready to go again. I ride him slowly at first, speeding up when we both near climax.
When we’re done, he mutters to me, “That one didn’t count - it was an in-between fuck - I'm making love to you next . . . every inch of your body.”
And he did.
The whole night was sublime - he did exactly what he said he would do to me.
In the morning, I feel him pressed against the back of me with his arms wrapped around my front, holding me in place, one of his knees tucked into mine.
I feel safe and comfortable, I could stay like that forever, but I have to use the toilet.
I try to get away from him, and his erection pushes into my bottom as he tightens his grip.
“I need to use the toilet.”
“Be quick.” His voice is sleepy.
When I get back, he’s awake, lying on his back and watching me walk from the en-suite. I'm self-conscious.
“Fucking gorgeous. Now get your arse in here.”
I get into bed and he’s on me, his mouth is on my breasts, taking one nipple in his mouth and then the other, kissing and licking the space in between them.
“I love these. I get to do this to them every day now that you're mine.” His hand rubs my clit, stoking my fire as he slides a finger into me.
“Wet again for me? A man could get used to this.” He kisses a trail along my neck to behind my ear, and his tongue is in my ear, which is strangely erotic, making me moan.
He flips me to my front and kneels between my legs, his body covering mine, his erection touching the right spot. He kisses the back of my neck, my back, and kisses each of my bum cheeks. He pulls my hips so that my bum is in the air, and fills me again. I yell out at the shock invasion.
“You OK, babe?” He asks
“Yes… please… keep going.” I gasp
He rams into me again, and I rest on my hands so that I'm on all fours, and I push back on him to meet his thrusts.
He growls, “Christ baby, it feels good to be inside you. My body was made for yours.”
“Harder, I want it harder.” I pant.
I feel the smile in his voice. “You like it rough, huh? Tell me you're mine.”
“I am yours, honey, I'm all yours, now own me.”
“Fuck . . . I like that.” His thrust picks up speed, and he pulls my hips back onto him.
I get close as our speed picks up, we go fast, losing the rhythm, going at it like animals to get to the climax, and when it hits us, it overwhelms us both.
We both cry out at the same time as he pounds into me.
“Jesus Christ, Nate . . . that was so good.”
He pulls out of me and flops onto his back. “You’re going to kill me with exhaustion. That was fantastic . . . you’re fantastic.” He leans in to kiss me while I'm still lying on my stomach.
He loves me.
I'm so happy… happy that I gave him a chance - and happy that I have somehow got this God of a man to fall in love with me. As I can see it at the moment, he doesn’t have any faults - he must have – because everyone has - but I haven’t come across them yet. It’s like he's too good to be true.