Chapter 16
Lorelai - 1 Week Later
I sat in the living room watching TV, drowning my sorrows in the remaining pint of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream, when Aurora came into the living room.
“Really? Is this all you’ve done today?” she asked, looking around at the dark room with disgust.
I’d called in sick for the entire week. The place was a disaster with pillows and blankets all over the floor. The kitchen was piled with dirty dishes; I hadn’t done laundry or showered in days. I looked around. “What?”
“Knox called again, and he asked about you yesterday at work.”
Ignoring what she’d just said, I shoved my spoon back into the container and scooped out more ice cream.
“You haven’t gotten dressed or showered in days. This room hasn’t seen sunlight in about as long, and this place is like a dungeon,” she said, bending down and picking up the pillows off the floor before making her way over to the window and opening the blinds.
“Hey!” I yelled as the bright light from the sun hurt my eyes.
“I’ve had enough. You can’t continue this. Why don’t you call him back?”
My eyes burned with tears. “I told you to tell him to leave me alone.”
“I’m not telling him. If you want to tell him that, go ahead. Just remember you chose this,” she said, putting her hands on her hips and staring at me.
I got up and pulled the blinds shut again before looking at her.
“Look, I can do what I want. You go to work, spend all your time with Dylan, do what you want to do,” I said, flopping back down and picking up the container of ice cream.
“What I want is to have my friend back!” Aurora said, staring at me, waiting for some sort of reaction. When I didn’t give her one, she came around and stood in front of the TV. “Have you even tried to contact him?”
I dropped my spoon into the container with force and looked at her, my eyes burning with tears at her question.
“You haven’t, have you?” she asked.
“We aren’t talking about him. I’ve told you to tell him to stop asking about me, to stop thinking about me. I’m not good for him.”
“Oh no. We are talking about him. I’ve also told you I’m not being your voice.” She bent down and grabbed the remote, shutting off the TV. “I’m done. You have been unbearable. You ended it with him and look at what it has caused. This place is a mess, and you stink.”
“I did what I had to do. Now let me wallow in my own self-pity.”
“Oh my god, you are impossible. You didn’t have to do it. You are being ridiculous over the entire thing. The articles have been retracted. If you had been at work one day over the past week, you’d have gotten your emails and know that the PR team has lined you up for interviews to clear your name. Hugo retracted everything.”
“It still doesn’t matter. The damage has been done, and it’s damage I have caused, just like I have caused with each relationship I’ve had. I’m always the cause.”
“Are you serious right now?” Aurora questioned, placing her hands on her hips.
I nodded. “I am.”
“How on earth do you think you caused the end of your relationship with Hugo?”
I shrugged. “Probably didn’t give him enough attention.”
“What about Bill?”
Bill and I never had an ounce of anything in common. It was a brief relationship which simply faded away. There hadn’t been a cause at all. I looked at her and shrugged.
“Maybe I should have been more interested in his stupid cars.”
“Oh my god, get over it already. Lorelai, the only relationship you are the cause of ending is this one. The man adores you, he’d do anything for you, I’d even put money on it that he is in love with you, and here you are treating him this way…why?”
“He loves me? That is funny. Do you realize that aside from you and Dylan, Lucas and Clay, no one knows about us? The other players, he hasn’t even mentioned it in interviews.”
“So, most of them are that way. Remember how long it took Phil before he mentioned Candace?”
“That was different.”
“How?”
“Candace didn’t bring all the adverse publicity to him. My ex-boyfriend and my past are ruining his career, and I can’t be the one to do that. It’s better if we part ways.”
It was the way I’d felt when he looked at me the night in the treatment room and as he stood here in the kitchen. However, the more I thought about it, the more I missed him, the more I realized I’d made a huge mistake. I wanted to be with him more than anything, and as things started to settle and return to this new normal, the more foolish I’d felt. So much, in fact, I’d made myself sick every morning for the past week knowing what I’d lost.
Aurora stood there looking at me, then she shook her head. “If you believe that, you are crazy. You didn’t tell Hugo to take out that article. He did it because he is an awful person. So, if that is the case, then perhaps I shouldn’t be dating Dylan then either.”
I frowned. “Why is that?”
“Well, he doesn’t speak with his father anymore. I caused that, so perhaps it’s time I tell him to take a hike.”
“What are you saying?” I questioned, sitting forward, feeling the world spin out of control at the thought that my best friend would give up something so wonderful for her.
She pulled her phone from her pocket and texted.
“What are you doing?” I asked again, trying to grab her phone.
“Texting Dylan. Telling him we’re over. I can’t have him not speaking with his father because of me,” she said. “It will just lead to more problems down the road when he realizes what a mistake he’s made.”
“Don’t you dare. I’m going to text him and tell him to ignore your messages,” I said, looking around for my phone.
“Stay out of it, Lorelai,” she said, as she feverishly typed away.
“Aurora, stop it. This will just be something else I have to add to my list of what I’ve done.”
“What you’ve done? Nope, this is all on me. I had the one-night stand, he ended up being my stepbrother, and even though our parents split, Dylan still doesn’t speak with him, all because of me.”
“He did that. Not you. Why would you even consider doing something like this when he makes you so happy,” I begged, still watching as she continued typing.
“Because I can.” She shrugged. “There…finished, now to send it.”
I got up and grabbed her phone from her hands, stopping her from making the dumbest mistake she could ever make. “I won’t let you do it!” I screamed.
“It’s my decision,” she said, reaching for her phone, only I pulled it back out of her reach. “Just like it was your decision to end things with Knox.”
I shook my head, not believing what she was planning to do. She couldn’t end things with Dylan. I turned my back to her and looked down at her screen. I’d planned to change every word she’d written, only when I began reading what she’d written, I found nothing, it was a pile of nonsense written in the body of an email. I turned and looked over my shoulder at her.
“This doesn’t even make any sense,” I said.
“Yep, you are right. It doesn’t.” She shrugged. “None of it.”
I looked back down at her screen. “Why would you…”
“To prove what an ass you are being,” she said, going over and opening the blinds, then grabbing my ice cream and some of my dirty dishes and heading into the kitchen. “You can’t control what others do, Lorelai. You are not the cause of your relationships ending, nor are you the reason behind any of the shit that has gone on in the media. Stop blaming yourself for things out of your control.”
“I can’t help it. It just seems people always get hurt when they get involved with me.”
“The only person I see getting hurt is you,” Aurora said. “Don’t help it. Call him. Make yourself happy for once, because you aren’t happy.”
She pulled me into her and hugged me tight. She was right; I was being ridiculous. I was the only one hurting myself by blaming myself for everyone else’s actions. “I hate that you are right. I know ending things with Knox wasn’t my finest hour.”
“Well then make today your best hour and go call him.” Aurora said, giving me one more hug before letting me go.
I smiled. “Thank you. Leave all this. I’ll clean everything up,” I murmured. “I have a phone call to make first.”
“Go get him!” Aurora yelled as I made my way down the hall to my room.
* * *
Two weeks later
I stood in front of my bedroom mirror. I’d chosen a champagne-coloured dress for the Dominator’s benefit gala tonight for Kids’ Cancer Research.
“I think these shoes will go better,” Aurora said, coming in with a pair of heels.
“Oh goodness, I don’t know.” I looked down at the black five-inch heels in her hand.
“Seriously, just try them on. Dylan loves these shoes. I’m sure Knox will feel the same way,” Aurora said, smiling up at me.
I knew the look on her face. She’d turned into a sex maniac after she got together with Dylan, and I really didn’t want to know anything about what had gone on with those shoes.
“Okay, fine. I’ll try them on, but please, spare me the details,” I said, grabbing one and slipping my foot into it, followed by the other.
“What details. He just really likes it when I wear them while—”
“Uhhhh…what part of I don’t want the details did you miss?” I laughed, looking over at my friend’s mischievous smile.
Aurora laughed, then gave me a once-over when I stood up. “Those are perfect.”
“You girls ready to go?” we heard Dylan call from down the hall.
“I think I am going to have to request they give us our key back,” I said, rolling my eyes as I grabbed my matching clutch from my dresser and carefully walked down the carpeted hall.
“We are ready,” Aurora said.
I’d just come around the corner and caught sight of Knox dressed in an all-black, perfectly tailored suit. I softly smiled and made my way over to him, placing a kiss on his lips.
The last two weeks had been perfect. I’d been so afraid to contact him that afternoon, but soon my fears were eased. He’d come to me the moment he finished practice, and we’d barely parted until he had to leave for a set of away games.
“Don’t you look fucking hot,” he said, taking my hand while I did a full spin.
“Thank you, as do you,” I said, meeting his lips once more.
“Now, before we head out. The two of you are good, right?” Dylan questioned, looking over at us.
I nodded and then glanced at Knox.
“Knox?” Dylan asked. “We don’t need some major fight or argument tonight. That goes for you too, Lorelai.”
“Yeah, we’re good. Things have blown over with the media, and with us. Tonight, it’s all about appearances and making people aware that we are in love. Something that should have happened ages ago,” he said, wrapping his arm around me, pulling me back against him and kissing the side of my neck. “We should go, before I peel this dress off you and make you mine again,” he whispered in my ear.
Excitement flooded me at the thought. We’d made up for the lost time over the last couple of weeks.
“We need to go.” I giggled, taking his hand and leading him to the door.
* * *
We’d had dinner and had been mingling around for the past two hours. Knox had given a couple of interviews on the advice of the PR team, and now we could enjoy the rest of the night. He led me out onto the dance floor where he pulled me into his arms. I closed my eyes and rested my head against his chest.
It had been a bad four weeks. The only thing I was grateful for was the fact that, with everything that had gone on, we’d become stronger.
“You doing okay?” he asked me quietly.
I nodded, snuggling against him. “I am trying. I’m still really mad about everything, but I’m working on letting it go.”
“We are going to have to let it go,” he whispered, placing a kiss on my forehead.
“He is just such a piece of shit. One that I actually thought was good for me.”
Knox held me tighter. “Listen, we all make mistakes in our lives. We enter into relationships that we think are healthy. Then something happens and we find out that the person we thought they were is the exact opposite of who they truly are. It’s not your fault.”
I looked up at him and smiled softly. “I know. I’m just happy that you gave me a second chance.”
“Second chance? Babe, I never let go of the first chance.” He twirled me around the dance floor, making me smile as he pulled me into him.
“You about done with tonight?” he questioned.
I nodded. “Very much so. The pictures, the watching eyes. I’m over it already.”
Knox chuckled as he pulled me closer to him.
“Honestly, I don’t know how you do it every day.” I sighed. “It’s exhausting.”
“Well then, what do you say to getting out of here?” he asked just as the song ended.
“Will we be missed or needed for anything else?” I questioned.
“Nope, I already told Pamela I was at my interview quota for tonight, so even if they wanted to ask me a question, they can’t.”
I looked over at Dylan and Aurora, who swayed to the song that had just started. She had her eyes closed as they danced together.
“Do you think we should let Dylan and Aurora know, or Lucas and Clay?”
He chuckled. “Dylan and Aurora look perfectly comfortable together. Lucas is off talking with some other guys, and Clay, well I saw him leave with some girl over twenty-five minutes ago.”
I giggled. “Did it look serious?”
Knox let out a laugh. “Clay serious about a woman? I highly doubt it. He’ll be serious for tonight. Tomorrow he won’t even remember her name.”
I slid my hand in his as I laughed at what he said and followed him out of the event area. We made our way to his car where he opened the door for me and waited for me to get in before closing my door and making his way around to the driver’s side. Once in, he buckled up and started the engine.
* * *
We’d stopped on the way home and grabbed a couple slices of pizza, and now, an hour later, we sat on the floor in his living room, him in a pair of shorts and me in one of his T-shirts, surrounded by pillows and blankets, each of us eating the last bite of our pizza.
He rested his head on his hand and watched as I wiped my mouth with a napkin before taking a drink.
“Can we talk about something?”
“Sure. What would you like to talk about?”
“Life, us.”
I nodded, beginning to feel a little uneasy. The last few weeks hadn’t been easy, and even after we’d made up, I worried this was coming.
“Okay, so what about life?” I questioned.
“Well, where do you see yourself in, oh, say, five years?”
I thought for a moment. “Um, I think I’d like to own my own place by then. Don’t tell Aurora that, by the way. I think she thinks we are going to be roommates forever.” I giggled.
“Okay, noted,” he said, winking at me. “Cross my heart.”
I smiled. “I’d also like to get married one day. Have a couple of kids, a dog, and a house over off the water and surrounded by nature.”
“Not in the city?” he questioned.
“No, I still want to be close to it, but I don’t want to be in it like I am now.”
“Makes sense.”
“What about you?” I questioned.
“I gave it some thought the other day and I want the same thing. It’s taken me time to realize that I want a family. I always thought that because my job demands most of my time, that it wouldn’t be something that was in the cards for me. However, now I know that’s not a reason to not follow through with that want. It will be hard for them, but it will be as equally hard on me,” he said, meeting my eyes.
“Just so you know, I’ve never found you to be unattentive, here or when you are away. You give everything you have. Whoever the woman is who ends up with you, she will be one lucky lady. I could only ever hope to have someone like you as my forever.”
I swallowed hard. I had no clue how much further he wanted to take things with me, and I didn’t want to assume I’d be his forever. Again, all I could do was hope.
Knox shifted and stretched his legs out in front of him, then turned to me.
“Where do you see this going?” He questioned, taking a drink of his water.
“What?”
He was silent for a moment, then met my eyes.
“Us?”
I thought for a moment before responding. I knew where I wanted it to go but was not sure about his feelings.
“Just be honest with me,” he said, reaching out and taking my hand in his. “Don’t be afraid of telling me to take a hike.” He winked.
Almost immediately, my heart felt like it might burst. Don’t be afraid to tell him to take a hike? What was that? Was Knox feeling vulnerable right now? If so, this was a side of him I’d never seen before.
“I’m wanting to take things further with you,” I said, swallowing hard, feeling that fluttery feeling in my stomach as the words settled between us.
He nodded, his blue eyes locking with mine.
“What about you?” My voice shook as I asked him because all I could think about was the night I’d turned him away and told him we were over.
He exhaled before he began. “Lorelai, my feelings for you have grown faster than I’d imagined, and I think it’s time that we take this to a more serious level, if that is what you are asking me,” he said, still holding my hand in his.
My eyes burned with the tears of happiness that were forming. Here I thought he was going to tell me to take a hike, or that perhaps he really wanted to end things with me, especially after he told me not to be afraid to tell him to go away. Yet here he sat, telling me he wanted to take things further with me.
Almost immediately, I got on my knees and straddled his lap, meeting his lips in a frantic yet passionate kiss. As his tongue washed through my mouth and his arms wrapped around me, I knew in that moment that here in his arms was exactly where I wanted to be.
“My mom and my sister are coming into town for the weekend. I want you to meet them,” he said as he held me.
“I’d love to,” I said, meeting his lips again.
“You know what I’d also love?” he asked.
“What’s that?”
“You, in my bed, now,” he whispered, between kisses.