Chapter 12
Sadie
By the time I get home, I still don’t know whether I want to scream, cry, or throw my phone directly into traffic. Possibly all three.
Owen is happily sprawled across the living room floor, watching cartoons, completely oblivious to the nuclear bomb of emotion that detonated in my life tonight.
I pace barefoot through the kitchen, my phone pressed to my ear, while Dani cackles so loudly I have to hold it away from my face. “I’m sorry,” she gasps between laughs. “I know you’re upset, but this is objectively hilarious.”
“It is NOT hilarious.”
“You accidentally joined a group chat reverse harem.”
“I hate you.” I try to hide the smile that creeps across my face, even though she can’t see me.
“No, you don’t.”
Unfortunately true. I lean against the kitchen counter with a groan, staring out the darkening kitchen windows while Owen makes dramatic explosion noises at the television. “I sent them pictures, Dani.”
“Plural. Sexy ones,” she teases gleefully.
I groan. “Oh, my God.”
“And…” she continues mercilessly, “You asked one of them for a dick pic.”
“That was you!” I sputter.
She starts laughing again. I bury my face in one hand.
Dani finally calms down enough to sigh dramatically. “Okay, but honestly? And promise you won’t get mad…”
“What?”
“You kinda knew.”
I frown. “No, I didn’t.”
“Yes, you did,” she says firmly.
“I absolutely did not.”
“You said it yourself, the personalities were completely different, Sadie.”
I open my mouth. Okay. Maybe she’s right. The messages had felt wildly inconsistent. Bossy one minute, funny the next. Dangerously sexy, then quiet and thoughtful at two in the morning. “That doesn’t mean I should’ve assumed it was four men.”
Dani gives a shrug. “Fair enough.”
I sink onto one of the kitchen stools with another groan. “I’m so embarrassed.”
“Are you though?”
“Yes!”
“Or are you mostly embarrassed because they’re all ridiculously hot? I bet they are, aren’t they?” When I don’t immediately deny it, Dani gasps dramatically. “Oh my God!”
“Stop.”
“You think they’re hot.”
I stare stubbornly at the counter, refusing to respond.
“Sadie Cross.”
I roll my eyes and sigh dramatically. “Oh my God, fine. Yes. Yes, they’re ridiculously hot.”
Dani shrieks so loudly that Owen glances over from the living room, hearing her through the phone. “You want to fuck all the bikers!”
I hesitate exactly one second too long. “I do not!”
“Describe them immediately.”
I groan but do it anyway because, honestly, talking to Dani always makes things feel less catastrophic somehow.
“Well…” I stare vaguely into space. “Dash is annoyingly pretty. Blond hair, blue eyes, movie star smile, chiseled jawline. He’s super confident and flirty.
You know the type, he knows he’s attractive. ”
“The worst kind,” Dani says knowingly. “Yet we women can’t resist.”
“The absolute worst kind.” I bite back a smile despite myself. “He’s funny though.”
“Mhm.”
“Chief’s the vice president of the Wild Riders.”
Dani cuts me off. “Wait, you didn’t tell me the club’s name was the Wild Riders?” she cackles. “Oh, I’ll bet they’ll give you a wild ride!”
“Do you want me to describe them or not?”
“Sorry,” she giggles. “Continue.”
“Chief’s big, not as tall as Kane, but at least six-two, he’s got a football player build, and a beard.”
“Ooh, rugged and manly, like a lumberjack, and the boss. A sugar daddy.”
“He’s probably like thirty-five, hardly sugar daddy age.”
“You don’t need to be older to give ‘fuck me daddy’ vibes.”
I snort softly. “He is very…” I exhale. “In control.”
“I knew it!”
“But he’s also calm, steady, someone who takes charge. It’s… nice.” The word feels futile to explain how his taking control made me feel safe and protected.
“Okay, you’re already into him.”
“No, I’m not,” the protest comes a little too quickly.
“You used your soft voice.”
I hate that she knows me that well. I quickly move on. “Shadow is the quiet one. He has a scar on his cheek—”
“Ooh, hot, love a bad boy,” she interrupts.
Heat creeps higher into my cheeks. “He’s intense.”
“Hot intense?” I can practically hear Dani waggling her eyebrows.
“Yes.”
“Murdery intense?”
“…Also, yes. But it’s a different kind of dangerous compared to Kane.” I lean against the kitchen counter, thinking about how Kane lifted me onto it last night.
Dani laughs delightedly. “And, what’s Kane like?
” she asks more softly. “Other than being sexy enough to make you give up your celibacy.” Of course, the first thing she demanded to know was whether or not we’d hooked up.
I’d quickly changed the subject, telling her about the bombshell I’d discovered first, but there’s no way she’s going to let me get away with not sharing the juicy details of last night.
I don’t know how to describe him. Kane isn’t abstract anymore. I know what he tastes like, what he sounds like when he loses control. How warm his skin felt against mine all night. Heat blooms low in my stomach.
“Kane is…” I start with a sigh.
“Oh, my God.”
“Stop saying, ‘Oh my God’.”
“You REALLY like him,” Dani replies.
I stare down at my hand wrapped around the phone. “I barely know him.”
“You slept with him.”
My face bursts into flames again. “Technically, we didn’t do much sleeping—” I bury my face in my free hand.
Dani gasps theatrically. “Sadie Cross. You little slut.”
“Dani!”
“I’m proud of you.”
I’m laughing despite myself now, warmth slowly easing some of the humiliation knotted in my chest.
Then she asks, “How was it?”
The laughter fades slightly. “Honestly? I don’t even know how to explain it. Intense, incredible, the best I’ve ever had,” I admit softly.
Dani whistles. “That good, huh?”
“So good it was honestly annoying.”
Dani howls with laughter again.
I smile helplessly. “He just…” I struggle for words. “He paid attention. He seemed to care more about my pleasure than his own. Maybe that sounds pathetic after years of marriage, but it’s true.”
“What’s pathetic is that your ex-husband didn’t prioritize your pleasure,” Dani says bluntly.
She’s right, it seems crazy now that I was married to a man who never puts anyone before himself.
Kane looked at me like I mattered. Touched me like he couldn’t get enough.
Sex with him wasn’t rushed or distracted; he was totally invested, giving me his undivided attention.
Ethan was always somewhere else mentally whenever we had sex, even before his affair.
“Kane scares me a little. He’s so intense, so passionate, and there’s a dangerous edge to him. Like if he told me he’d kill for me, he’d mean it literally. We’ve only just met, yet it feels like I already belong to him.”
Dani’s voice softens slightly. “Yeah,” she says quietly. “No wonder you’ve got it bad, girl.”
I stare out the kitchen window, freezing when I see the motorcycle parked across the street. The rider sits astride it motionless beneath the streetlight. Shadow. Even from here, I recognize him instantly, somehow.
My stomach tightens. “He’s here,” I say quietly.
“What? Who? Kane? Ethan? Your mysterious stalker?” Dani asks, sounding worried.
“No, no, it’s one of the Wild Riders,” I rush to assure her.
We’ve already considered the possibility that Kane left the note, and even though he is intense and a wild card, I know he wouldn’t do anything to scare me or make me feel unsafe.
Dani, like the guys, is convinced that Ethan is behind the note.
Dani immediately relaxes. “Which one?”
“It’s just Shadow,” I say vaguely.
“Are you going to invite him in for some fun?” Dani teases.
“Absolutely not, he’s just checking in, he’ll be gone soon, I’m sure.”
Shadow makes no move to approach the house. He just sits there calmly watching the street. Something about him quietly standing sentinel affects me more than I want it to.
“You should flirt with him, with all of them,” Dani says suddenly. “Nothing’s changed apart from now you know for sure that there’s four of them.”
I blink. “What?”
“You heard me.”
“I am actively furious with them. I don’t want to talk to any of them, let alone flirt with them.” Still, I can’t seem to look away from the muscular slope of Shadow’s shoulders.
Unsurprisingly, Dani sees through me. “Mhm. Furious and attracted.” I hate that she’s right. Dani laughs softly. “Sadie, when was the last time you had fun?”
I have no response because I honestly can’t remember.
Dani’s voice softens slightly. “You spent years shrinking yourself for Ethan. And I know you say it wasn’t him, but honestly, you have to admit that maybe Ethan did leave the note.”
Fear prickles cold across my skin again. Fear that I know nothing about the man I married, the man I once loved more than anything. “No.”
“Sadie.”
“He wouldn’t—”
“He got jealous when waiters looked at you too long.”
I stare silently at Shadow across the road. Dani continues carefully. “You humiliated him.”
Guilt twists automatically in my chest. “I didn’t mean to.”
“I know.” Her voice softens. “But maybe in his mind you did.”
I haven’t forgotten Ethan’s face from last night, the rage and hatred in his sneer, the smell of liquor on his breath, the way he clenched his fists as if he might actually hit me.
But still, surely, he wouldn’t have come back and threatened me?
Surely once he calmed down, he felt bad, not angry enough to terrify our son and me.
No. Surely not. But still… if not Ethan, who else could it be?
Eventually, Dani hangs up and I’m left with my thoughts. Especially the bit about her joking about my reverse harem situation.
I make grilled cheese and tomato soup while Owen happily chats about his day. Halfway through dinner, he freezes mid-bite. “The thunderbike man.”
I look up. Shadow still sits across the street, motionlessly watching the house. Rain clouds gather overhead now, darkening the evening sky.
“He’s still there,” Owen says happily.
“Yep.”
Owen looks at me seriously. “Can he have some grilled cheese?.”
I almost laugh. “I think he’s okay.”
Owen looks scandalized. “But it’s dinner time.”
Fair point. Twenty minutes later, after relentless four-year-old campaigning, I finally sigh. “Fine. One sandwich.”
Owen cheers triumphantly. I watch nervously through the window while Owen runs across the street carrying a plate wrapped in foil.
Shadow swings off the bike the second he sees Owen approaching.
The interaction surprises me. Not because Shadow’s nice to Owen, but because he’s so gentle, so natural.
He crouches to Owen’s height automatically while Owen talks animatedly with his hands.
Shadow listens seriously, as if garbage-truck stories were matters of the utmost importance.
Eventually, Shadow glances toward the house.
He says something, and Owen nods, hugging him before running back toward the house.
Shadow doesn’t look away. His gaze meets mine. Even from across the street, I feel the weight of his eyes. He lifts one hand slightly in a quiet wave. I wave back before I can stop myself.
***
By the time Owen’s asleep upstairs, rain lashes violently against the windows, a full Southern storm now. Thunder cracks hard enough to shake the glass while lightning flashes pale blue across the living room. Shadow is still outside, sitting motionless on the motorcycle in the pouring rain.
“What the hell,” I mutter. “Just go already…” Guilt gnaws at me harder with every minute. Finally, I yank open the front door. Cold rain-scented air rushes inside. “You know there are easier ways to get pneumonia, right?” I shout, my words getting caught in the wind.
Shadow looks up slowly from across the street. Rain pours off his dark hair and leather cut. “I’m fine.”
“You’re drenched.”
A beat passes. “I’m supposed to stay close.” Something about the simple certainty in his voice makes my chest ache unexpectedly.
I sigh heavily. “You can come inside.”
He shakes his head. “No.”
I blink, surprised and a bit annoyed, I’m being generous here, inviting him in, and he’s refusing? “What?”
“I upset you earlier.” The quiet sincerity catches me off guard.
“I’m still annoyed,” I admit.
His mouth twitches slightly.
Thunder cracks overhead violently. Rain pounds harder against the pavement. My umbrella shakes, doing little to protect me from the onslaught. I clutch the umbrella tighter. “Shadow…” He raises an eyebrow. “You are not sitting in a thunderstorm all night,” I insist.
He pauses long enough that I think he might stubbornly refuse, but then, finally, he slowly swings off the bike and follows me inside.
He somehow looks even larger in my small living room.
Rainwater drips onto hardwood floors while I hand him a towel.
“Thanks.” His voice stays low and calm like always.
I watch him dry his hair slowly, again, I’m struck by how attractive he is.
Dangerous looking in a way that should scare me.
Instead, it makes me feel strangely safe.
Unlike Kane, who is every bit as dangerous as his appearance suggests, Shadow’s intimidating looks are at odds with his gentle, almost shy nature.
“Why are you helping me?” I ask quietly.
Shadow glances up, his gray eyes searching mine. “Because you deserve it,” he says simply, without hesitation, or flirtation, just honesty.
I look away first. The storm rumbles outside while silence settles warmly through the living room.
“We’re sorry for lying to you, all of us,” Shadow says quietly.
I glance back toward him. The sincerity in his expression makes it harder to hold onto my anger.
“It just…” he exhales softly. “Got outta control.”
I fold my arms. “How does four men accidentally catfish someone?”
One corner of his mouth lifts slightly. “Poor impulse control.”
Despite myself, I laugh softly.
Shadow watches me carefully. “We liked talking to you. We knew we should tell you the truth, but none of us wanted to lose our conversations. We were worried you’d run for the hills if you knew.”
Something about the way he says it, quiet, honest, and steady, makes me believe him. The room suddenly feels smaller, charged somehow. I become hyperaware of the storm outside, the soft lamplight dancing in his eyes, the water dripping slowly from the shirt that clings to his muscled chest.
Shadow breaks the moment first. “It’s getting late,” he says gently, as if he’s giving me an escape route.
I swallow slowly. “Right.”
I set blankets on the couch for him while thunder rolls outside. Then head upstairs, feeling oddly breathless. Later, lying awake beneath warm blankets while rain pounds the windows, I find myself thinking, not about Kane, but about what it might feel like to kiss Shadow instead.