December 16th #2
“Proposes?” I say, shocked. And while I want to ask a million questions about it, the beaming smile on my mom’s face stops me. “That’s big.”
Mom blushes. “I don’t think he’s going to, personally.” She points at Damon’s mom and Jennifer. “They’re the ones who keep bringing it up.”
“What would you say if he did?” Sammy asks. “You haven’t been dating all that long.”
“When you’re our age, you know what’s right for you. And of course, she’d say yes!” Damon’s mom replies.
“Plus, it’s so wonderful to see two people who have been through so much find happiness with each other,” Jennifer gushes. “It’s like something out of one of my movies.”
“And our trip to Switzerland was so incredible,” Mom says. “I wasn’t sure how we’d travel together. It can be stressful sometimes. And I wondered if I’d get sick of being with him for days on end. But it was perfect. He’s almost perfect.”
“Almost?” Jennifer asks.
“He doesn’t like maple syrup,” Mom says with a laugh. “I’ve never met anyone who doesn’t.”
“Oh, that might be a fatal flaw for me.” Sammy chuckles while I go try on a few more outfits.
Once everything has been chosen, Damon’s mom gets the organizers to add everything to my closet.
And when I go into my little cottage at the end of the day, I’m overwhelmed.
With love.
My closet is organized. My drawers are organized. Really, I feel like my life is organized. And after feeling a bit out of control during my pregnancy, it’s like I finally have it back.
I go through the closet and choose an outfit to wear tomorrow.
For my first day at work.
Then I close my eyes and lie on the bed with a happy sigh.
Ever again.
Damon
Haley: Call me tonight, please.
It’s been a long day. I want to just call Ainsley and go to bed. But I call Haley first because I’m hoping everything is okay.
“There’s my Hay Girl. What’s shaking?” I ask her when she answers my video call.
“Look, you’re my best friend, and I’m just trying to understand how all this works with Ainsley. I care about you, but I feel like you’re downplaying this situation.”
“What situation?”
“This whole baby situation.”
“Haley,” I say sternly, “you know I love you, but I already went through this with your brother. I don’t need shit from you too.”
“What do you mean, you went through it with my brother?”
“We got in a fight. At practice yesterday. He wouldn’t throw to me because he was pissed about this situation. I shouldn’t have to explain my actions to you, him, or anyone else.”
“Actually, I’m not looking for you to explain your actions.
You need to explain her actions. You know that I like Ainsley, but now I’m pissed off at her.
I mean, how is it possible that you’re in love with someone and you hide something like that from them?
Don’t you consider that a huge betrayal? Even I feel betrayed.”
“I don’t. And that should be good enough for you.”
“Okay, so what about living apart? That makes no sense whatsoever. When are you going to see your baby?”
“When I can. Think about it. When I’m at school, especially during season, I’m gone for twelve hours a day. Sometimes more than that. While I do want to see my baby as much as possible, if I’m going to give my child the life I want her to have, I need to focus on football.
“And Ainsley’s got big dreams too. The job she got is literally her dream job. I won’t ask her to give that up. Also, her living in Kansas City means she will have the full support of our families there.” I stop and stare at Haley.
“Look, it’s only been a few days, and I’m already sick of saying the same thing to everyone. Of having to explain my actions. I’m not doing it. Ever again. Okay?”
“Okay,” she says, frowning.
I roll my eyes at her. “Fine. I’ll talk to you about it. You know we’re in love. And you encouraged it.”
“I know.”
“I’ll be going back and forth as often as possible. We’ll video chat. We’re going to make it work because it’s what we want. Of course, we wish it could be different. Our preference would be for us to be together every day. It’s a short-term solution until we can live the life we dream about.”
“I just don’t understand why she can’t get a job in Lincoln.”
“She could have. Actually, she did. She was going to take a job she wasn’t excited about, simply for us to be together.
But then her uncle called her and offered her a job, working with your mom.
She’s going to get to learn everything from her and eventually take over when your mom retires in a few years.
It’s going to set her up for the future.
And the timing couldn’t be more perfect.
In two years, she’ll be able to work from anywhere.
Hopefully, I’ll get drafted, and we’ll move together to wherever that is. ”
“I also heard you’re going to build a house here, out by your mom’s.” She says it in a way that makes me feel bad for not telling her about it.
“Chase and I decided that no matter where we end up living, we’d like our kids to grow up together like we did.
And we know the chances of us being on the same team are pretty slim, so we thought it would be cool to at least be together during the offseason.
And I didn’t tell you because I wanted to surprise Ainsley.
And that was before I even knew she was pregnant. ”
She lets out a sigh.
“Is this really about me and Ainsley, or are you upset about you and Daine?”
“It’s different. Daine and I are just friends. That’s kind of all it can be right now. Until I’m older, I guess. And when the timing works.”
“So, you’re saying that you love each other, but due to timing, you’re going to be apart for a bit in the hopes that you can play college volleyball while he keeps building his career, even though you won’t be in the same city. Is that correct?”
“Oh, I see what you’re doing. And, yes, that is correct. Am I being a hypocrite?”
“I mean, if the shoe fits.”
“The shoe, in my case, isn’t having a baby. I just worry about you, D.”
“I know you do. And I appreciate it. Talk to me about how you’re feeling. We haven’t talked about your leg or your coaching stuff much lately.”
“You’re busy with football. I know it’s an important season. It’s setting everything up for you and Chase. So, I guess I am kinda like Ainsley more than I thought. Because something happened that I didn’t tell you about. Because it’s … just a distraction.”
“What happened?”
“Pace and I talked.”
“You talked? How did that happen? When did it happen?”
“He texted me, and we met about a month ago.”
“And how was it?”
“Well, before I tell you that, I need to come clean about something else.”
“Okay …”
“The reason why it hurt me so badly when Pace didn’t speak to me after the accident is because we’d had sex that night. For the first time. He had already told me he loved me. We had talked about our futures. Together. And his ignoring me really hurt.”
“Oh, Haley, you should have told me!”
“I know, but anyway, we talked. He’s got a lot of guilt. Thinks he ruined my life. My dreams. He says he’s still struggling. Although it’s my understanding that he’s fully recovered from his physical injuries. To look at him, you’d never know.”
“Unlike you?” I ask.
“Yeah.”
“You’re going to heal completely, Hay. It’s just taking you a little longer.”
“I know. But get this. I think the real reason he even talked to me is because he’s dating someone. Seemed to want forgiveness. And closure.”
“And what did you say to that?”
She sighs again. “I told him that I don’t need closure because I got slapped in the face with it after the accident when he was too big of a coward to speak to me.
I told him I don’t blame him for the accident.
Clearly, it wasn’t his fault. But I also told him that what I can’t get over is the way he handled the aftermath of it.
And that this is too little, too late. I told him to have a great life and wished him the best. Then said goodbye. ”
“It sounds like you handled it well. Stood up for yourself while still being polite. I haven’t talked to him in forever. He didn’t just cut you out of his life. He did me and Chase too.” I smile at her. “So, how are you doing, really?”
“Honestly, it just really cemented the fact that how I felt about him is no comparison to how I feel about Daine.”
“And do you want to talk about Daine?” I ask her.
“It’s not about him. It’s about the reality of our situation.
You, Chase, and Dani have always known what you wanted to do in the future.
And even though I still desire to play college volleyball, I’m wondering how important it really is to me.
Like, what will it lead to beyond that? I guess I could play professionally.
Maybe go to the Olympics or something, but it’s not necessarily what I see as my future career.
I don’t know. Daine’s life is in Nashville. Or at least it’s his home base.”
“What does he have to say about it?”
“Honestly, he wishes I would go to college there. So, we could, you know, be together. It’s hard when two people have their own hopes and dreams, and one of them finds those dreams start to shift. Like, do you give up your dream to support someone else’s?”
“I think you figure out a way to have both.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“Haley, if it’s supposed to work out, it will. It’s crazy to think that I bought a lot to surprise Ainsley to build the house I hoped we’d fill with kids in the future. Little did I know, that future is now. I feel like, sometimes, the universe knows better than we do.”
“I heard through the grapevine that you were considering transferring schools.”
“Yeah, I was, but she talked me out of it. Are the next couple of years going to be challenging? Am I scared? Yeah, but hopefully it will become our new normal. And it’s leading us to our ultimate goals.”
“Well, you’re lucky then,” she says, tearing up. “And it gives me hope. That maybe the universe is plotting and planning something amazing for me and Daine. In the meantime, I have to go write an essay about a topic I couldn’t care less about.”