Chapter 18
The feeling of Sadie, soft and wet, moaning my name while she begged me to touch her, still lingers in my mind.
Today has been a lot more full-on than I anticipated, keeping me in the office with Annie all day.
But when Sadie smiled at me through the crowd, I was overcome with the need to kiss her.
To claim her amongst everyone standing there, especially after seeing Ryker so close to her, whispering God knows what into her ear.
As soon as my lips found hers in the loft, my hands did the talking for me. And to my surprise, she wanted me, too.
Damn, I loved watching her squirm.
I’m still smiling when I catch up with Wes, who’s been shouting my name like a goddamn curse. “Hey, what’s up?” I ask him.
Worry flashes in his eyes. “There’s a situation.” He nods for me to follow him, so I do without question.
We weave around the corner, towards the main driveway, where a bright red sports car sits haphazardly parked, blocking the gravel drive.
It takes me a second to realize what’s happening.
Blake, Ryker, and a few others stand around Cole while my cousin, Cash Harlow, is throwing a fit.
His words slur together. His golden hair waves in many different directions, barely able to keep himself upright in his fancy, disheveled suit.
Yelling with a bottle in his hand. Drunk beyond all reason.
It’s been a while since his last outburst. Thankfully, Wes, Blake, and Ryker are already steering people away. Trying to keep the situation contained. Cole attempts to console him, but he won’t listen, and it’s getting on my last nerve.
“Hey, hey,” I step in between them. “Calm down.”
Cash laughs, indignant. “Oh, there he is. Fuck. Look at this,” he gestures towards me as I stand in front of the pack.
“My own family has turned against me. If you can even call it that.” He spits on the ground, barely missing my boot.
“But it was always going to be this way, wasn’t it?
I never knew you could hate me so much.”
“We did not turn—” Cole starts.
“Stop talking, old man,” Cash sneers.
“Hey,” I snap. “You want to be angry, be angry at me.” I wasn’t going to tolerate anyone talking to Cole that way.
He focuses back on me, eyeing me carefully. “Oh, I am. You’re as much to blame as he is for my suffering.”
Suffering.
I almost laugh. My uncle has done nothing but love a son who only cared about himself. Repeatedly taking care of his debts, so Cash would avoid prison when he should’ve just let him rot.
“The only one who did this to you was yourself.”
“I see,” Cash shakes his head, tsking at Cole. “Better keep the golden boy in the dark so you get what you want. You never change, do you, Dad?”
Cole’s gaze falls to the gravel.
Cash steps closer to me. “You know, cousin, you’re just a tool to him, just like I was. But then again, you’ve always been the chosen one. The son that Cole always wanted.”
Cole always preferred me, but I wasn’t a spoiled brat who gambled a hard-working man’s fortune away.
“I think it’s time you got going,” I say calmly.
“Do you really want the ranch?” he asks.
My jaw clenches, not wanting to answer. Not wanting to speak my true feelings in front of Cole. The last thing that I want to do is hurt him.
“Lone Pine is mine, Kit. That bastard of a father owes it to me.”
“He owes you nothing,” I huff.
Cash smiles, staggering back to his car. “So be it. I’ll tell you the truth someday, cousin. Let’s see if you still love him, then.” He hops in his red sports car and spins around, leaving a dust cloud in his wake.
I exhale, letting off steam.
Cole’s hand lands on my shoulder, steady and firm. “You did well, Kit.” His voice sounds tired and defeated as he hangs his head. Walking away, followed by Blake and Wes, who trail silently behind him.
Ryker moves to my side. “You alright?”
I nod, trying to forget Cash’s words before they make me question the man I loved the most. What the fuck was he trying to accuse him of?
“You want to get a beer or something?” he offers.
“I’ve got plans,” I murmur as my phone vibrates in my pocket. And I’m looking forward to finding Sadie like I promised, to finishing what I started in the loft.
“Plans to sit alone on your front porch are not plans,” he narrows his brown eyes at me, frowning intensely. “This loner lifestyle isn’t healthy, man.”
But I’m too distracted by Sadie’s name on my phone to respond.
Sadie:
Averie is going through something… I’m sorry, but I’m headed to her place now. I don’t know when I’ll be back.
Kit:
Be safe.
Sadie:
Tomorrow, Cowboy??
Kit:
Tomorrow.
“Earth to best friend. Come in, best friend. Over,” Ryker uses his hands to make radio transmission noises like he’s some kind of astronaut.
“Sorry,” I chuckle. “Looks like I no longer have plans.”
I’m a patient man. I can wait, and she’s worth it.
Ryker’s dark brow raises with intrigue. “Who did you have plans with?”
My phone vibrates again, pulling me back.
Sadie:
Also, I hate to ask, but would you mind checking on Foxie?
Kit:
You can always ask me to do that.
Sadie:
Stop being so sweet. You already had your hand down my pants.
Kit:
And the next time I do, you’re going to come so hard you’ll see stars.
Sadie:
Fuck, Cowboy.
I chuckle, tucking my phone in my pocket, wrapping an arm around Ryker’s shoulders, who’s still standing there, confused. “I have a lot to tell you, brother.”
An hour later, I’m sitting on the docks at Ryker’s cabin, gazing out at the half-frozen river. Bandit and Oreo lie on a flannel blanket near us, chewing on twigs while Ryker and I open our second can of beer. After telling him about my date with Sadie, he grins widely, not the least bit surprised.
“I had my suspicions about you two,” he muses.
“At first, I thought maybe she and Blake were finally ramping things up, but it didn’t make sense.
That level of smug satisfaction is a look I’ve only seen on her face when she’s around you.
That and well, the glaring sexual chemistry. It’s ridiculous, really.”
My mouth tugs into a smile.
“Figured maybe something happened, but you weren’t ready to admit I was right,” he grins, nudging my shoulder.
“Yes, you were right.” As much as it pains me to admit.
“I’m happy for you,” he smiles.
“We’ve had one date, Ryker.” There are still plenty of things that could go wrong. For one, she could decide she no longer wants me, that she wants someone else…
Someone better.
It would be a recurring theme that I’m used to.
He rubs the back of his neck. “Yeah, I know, but it’s been a damn long time since you’ve been with anyone, man. For only one date, you already seem happier.”
Well, at the moment, Sadie seems to be the only thing going right. Everything else in my life feels too overwhelming. Like no matter what decision I make, someone is going to get hurt.
My aunt and uncle. The thirty ranchers who call this place home. My best friend.
Sadie.
She loves it here.
Or I can just pretend it makes me happy. That I want the crushing responsibility. It seems like the best option, and the only one I can make. Hurt myself for the sake of everyone else. Another theme I’m used to.
I pull out a cigarette and light it up, needing to release some tension, blowing smoke into the frigid air.
“That is, besides the ranch falling on your shoulders and Cash trying to start fires,” Ryker says, filling in my silence. Feeling the tension I’m putting out. “And the fact Cole has—” he sucks in a breath, not able to finish. “How are you feeling about all of that, anyway?” he asks.
After Cole sprung everything on me, I called Ryker, needing someone to talk to. But all he’s done since then is listen to me complain. No pressure. No pushing me to accept Cole’s offer, which is half what I expected him to do after I told him he had lung cancer.
“I promised Cole I’d think about it. But I don’t see much of a choice in the matter.”
Ryker nods, staring out at the tall pines across the river. The sun descends behind the snowy mountains, enveloping us in darkness. The back porch light flickers on, providing a warm glow as we sit in silence for a few minutes.
“What happens if you don’t accept his offer?” Ryker asks.
“Lone Pine goes to Cash,” my jaw clenches.
“Fuck,” he murmurs, staring at his hands. The right one is inked with two sparrows, and the word “family” written between them. “Well, if you decide you don’t want the ranch, what else would you want to do?”
It would be great if I had some idea of what my life looked like without the ranch. That I had a reason to say no that made me feel like less of a disappointment. Like less of a selfish asshole, but there isn’t one.
“I don’t know.”
“You could go back to San Fran—”
“No way in hell.” He knew it was my favorite city, but I could never go back. Too many memories.
He chuckles. “Well, whatever you decide. I support you.”
“You understand if I don’t sign off on the ranch, Cash will sell this place. You’ll lose your job. This cabin. Your whole way of life.” Does he not understand the stakes?
His life here is everything to him, and after his brother Sawyer died, his family fell apart. It was a dark time in his life. A time he rarely discusses with anyone, even me. Then he came to Lone Pine, the place that saved him, just as it’s saved many people who now call this place home.
Ryker nods, stroking his mustache. “If I lose it, it was never meant for me.”
“You’re in a damn good mood tonight.” What happened to the drinking himself silly version? Not that I want that, of course. I’d rather him be happy. But he’s acting strange.
He glances at his watch with a grin. “That’s because I’ve got a date in about twenty minutes.”
A date? Well, it can’t be with Averie. She’s currently with Sadie in Aspen Hollow, having an emotional crisis. “With who?”
“Cassie Jean,” he smiles. “She works at Stag & Steam. Met her last week. We’ve been texting ever since.”
“So… Averie—”
His expression turns cold. “She’s not interested,” he bites out. “Therefore, I’m moving on.”
With Cassie Jean, apparently. Typical Ryker.