Lennox
Elodie gives me a soft hug and then turns to Jace giving him the same type of platonic embrace she just gave me.
I’m surprised, being that I’ve been preparing myself the entire car ride for this moment.
Being forced to watch him kiss her, saying sweet nothings to each other as they say goodnight. But, none of that happened.
I really wanted to dislike Elodie. I tried really fucking hard, too. But, it was impossible because she’s undeniably delightful. Sweet, kind, totally put together.
Perfect match for our golden boy.
I sit back in my seat, cross my arms over my chest and, maybe I’m pouting, a little bit.
Howard gets in the driver's seat, raises the partition between us and begins to drive off.
“Does he need my address or does he remember from last time?”
“Are you going to stop sulking?”
I gasp. The audacity.
“I’m not sulking. I’m processing,” I rebut.
“Sulking.”
“Fine. I’m a jealous bastard. What can I say?” I shrug.
“You don’t have to be,” he says, more quietly than normal, like a confession.
I lean forward, pressing my elbows on to my knees and give in to him like I normally do. Telling him everything I should be holding back.
“Elodie gets to love you in public. Of course I’m jealous.”
He flinches and I’m unsure if the word love bothers him or my directness.
My feelings may be teetering in that direction but it’s not a full confession of love. I’m just envious that she gets the chance.
“It’s not like that.”
“No? Then what is it?”
“We’re just friends,” he admits. “Dating her was sort of an obligation, but there’s nothing there. Never has been.”
I rub my fingertips over my lips hiding a smile. I’m happy to hear that, I really am. But it still doesn’t change things between us. He’s still going to push me away every chance he gets and I’ll just be sitting at home, alone, pining for him.
Still, I’m a glutton for punishment.
“Is that right?” I lean in closer to him. That deep cedar, crisp scent I dream about wafts around me and I close my eyes, breathing it in.
When I reopen them, Jace’s eyes are laser focused on mine with the same wanton need. His eyes bounce between my lips and eyes and it’s in these moments I fall apart for him.
I want to kiss him. Slam my body against his. Do all the things I’ve been dreaming about since the last time I saw him. Somehow, I force myself to pull back. Keeping myself in the friend zone where he’s designated me a permanent parking spot and huff out a long, exhausted breath.
Sure, we flirt over messages. Mostly because I initiate it and I can be a pushy bastard when it comes to what I want.
But, there’s so much more to him that I don’t get.
He’s a vault because of his long history in the spotlight and whatever happened in his past. I get that too, but he makes himself so fucking unavailable, it’s infuriating.
A passing freeway sign catches in my periphery and I lean closer to the window, peering out of it.
“We’ve passed my exit.” I lean toward the partition to knock on the window and let Howard know but Jace pulls my arm back.
“I told him to take us to my house.”
“Oh, really?” I raise my eyebrows in surprise.
He nods confidently, as he pins me with that bossy Jace look I love so much.
I peer down at my shoes, sucking in a deep breath, then shift my gaze back to him. I move forward, minimizing the space between us, crowding him. He presses his back deeper into the leather seat and it makes him sit taller, his gaze not wavering against mine.
“This isn’t rehearsal. We’re not filming.
This is me and you, Jace, and if you take me back to your home, it’s not because of your confused feelings on set or curiosity after a scene.
It’s because I want you and you want me and there’s no going back after this.
Not for me. I will pursue you properly.” His eyes widen with worry and his body visibly stiffens.
“I’m not saying it needs to be public, but you can’t push me away anymore.
I will love you in private, until you’re ready for me to love you out loud. ”
He tilts his head to the side, squinting as if my words were painful for him to hear.
My parents were weak and couldn’t take care of me or love me like they should have. But I’ve had friends that have grown into the family I’ve found for myself. It’s unconventional and I might not have traditional holidays but I have people I can count on.
I don’t think he’s ever felt loved by anyone.
His parents, I internally scoff. They appear to treat him more like a business transaction than anything else and the people he depends on are the people on his payroll. He’s never had anyone who just wanted to be here.
That needs to fucking change.
I grip his jaw, pulling his gaze back to me. We’re face-to-face, our lips so close I can feel short airy puffs of his breath.
“Do you have any idea how hard it’s been to hold myself back?” I ask.
“Yes. I do,” he breathes out the words almost inaudibly, saying it like someone who can relate to the suffering.
“Fucking hell.” I crush our lips together, sealing my words deep in his mouth.
Shoving them into him until they’re seared in his soul, because I meant everything I just said.
It doesn’t matter what our current circumstances are, I’d wait a lifetime for him to be ready and I’ll take anything he’s willing to give me now.
“Mmmm,” he moans into my mouth and I lick it up. Our tongues moving together, crashing against each other and I find myself climbing on top of him.
I can’t get close enough. I want his body glued to mine. I want to physically stitch him to my skin as deeply as he’s stitched himself in my heart.
Tap. Tap.
I rear back, both of us jolting a look at the window.
Howard stands with his hands interlaced in front of him. Looking like a perfect mix of the bodyguard and loyal driver that he is. Patiently waiting for us to exit.
I didn’t even realize we stopped.
Glancing around the brick wall of a male robot, Jace’s house comes into view.
The white paneling with black borders mix with the earthy tones of the accent pieces outside.
It’s very mid-century modern with large windows and a front door that looks more like a fortress barricade than a simple residence entrance.
It’s large and elegant but not flashy. It’s very modest for someone of his stature. Humble and logical, just like him.
Jace sits up straighter and I start to crawl off of him but before I can get too far, he grabs my shirt, pulling me in for another searing kiss. “Keep that thought.”