Chapter 7 #3
I nod, shifting my weight. "Yeah, sure, you could."
I watch her lift her chin, directing Hannah to drop the grocery bags by the sink with a quick movement of her hand. Then she turns back to me, tilts her head toward the porch door, and begins to walk out in front of me.
"Okay, thirteen going on forty," I murmur under my breath.
She shakes her head but keeps walking. We step out onto the wooden porch, the screen door clicking shut behind us. The afternoon wind catches the strands of my hair, blowing them across my forehead, and I lift a hand to tuck them behind my ears.
Ava turns around, her back pressing against the porch railing. "Are you and Dad getting a divorce soon, or not?"
The question hits me like cold water, stopping me right in my tracks. "Uh... I don't really think so. He doesn't want to sign the papers."
"What about you?" she asks, her eyes wide and searching. "Did you actually expect the divorce to happen when you pushed for it?"
"Uh... at that time, yes," I say, looking out over the green lawn. "But I don't know now. Why all these questions, Ava?"
She places her hands flat on the balcony railing, turning her face away to look at the driveway.
"Well, I'm tired of Dad asking me all these baseless questions about you every time he calls.
And plus... if you guys aren't going to get a divorce, can you just hurry whatever this thing is up? Because it's getting really tiring."
I step closer to her, noticing the tightness in her jaw. "What else aren't you telling me, Ava?"
She chews on her lower lip for a second before looking back at me.
"The people at school are mocking Liam and me about the separation.
And I hate it. I mean... I know what happened with you, and I don't want you to ever go through that loneliness again.
But at the same time, I do not want my siblings to have to be bullied because of this scenario.
So I don't know if you guys could just hurry all of this up. "
She turns her whole body toward me, her eyes shining with the confusion of a kid trying to carry an adult's weight. "I could help you if you want. I mean... just tell me what you want me to do to fix it."
My chest aches at the sight of her expression. I step forward and pull her into a tight embrace. "Come here, baby. Look at me. Mom and Dad aren't getting a divorce. I love your father. And..."
"Daddy loves you too," she completes my sentence against my shoulder.
I pull back slightly, tilting my head. "Huh? How do you know that?"
"He is always watching your news sessions on his tablet," she says, a small, genuine smile finally breaking through her serious face. "And he's always smiling like a dog."
A laugh bubbles out of my throat. "A dog?"
"Yes," she says, pulling back completely to look me in the eye.
"He always has this look on his face, like he's salivating over the screen, and I hate watching it.
And the other night, when we were watching a movie in your bedroom, I caught him sniffing your clothes in the wardrobe.
Sometimes he even wears your big shirts around the house. "
I laugh again, but a wave of thick, liquid warmth floods my stomach at the picture of him pining over my empty side of the closet. "Well, technically, those big shirts are his, Ava."
"And he cries at night, Mom," she adds, her voice dropping into a quieter tone. "Just like you did. He looks like he's going to fall ill every time we talk to him."
I blink, the image of his tired eyes in my office flashing back into my mind. "Huh? But he looked good when he came to see me today."
"That's probably due to the leftover makeup from his studio session," she says, stopping mid-sentence as her eyes go wide. "Wait. Huh? He came to see you?"
I nod at her question, a small smile stuck on my face.
"Finally," she breathes, rolling her eyes. "He's always asking me to change the video direction on my phone so that he can see your reflection in the mirror or watch you in the kitchen whenever we are on a video call."
I look down at the porch floorboards, my heart doing a nervous flip. Knowing he would resort to that just to catch a glimpse of me melts every bit of the anger left in my chest.
Ava wraps her arms tightly around my waist again. "Daddy loves you so much, Mummy. So when he apologizes properly, please just come back home. Let's go back to being like before... before Nora came into the picture and everything got too busy."
I wrap my arms around her shoulders, squeezing her close. "Oh, sweetie... sure, we will soon. He just needs to learn a few lessons first."
"I hope he does," she mutters into my sweater. "But I really don't like that man people keep pairing you with on the internet."
I pull back slightly, looking down at her. "What man?"
"Your new co-host," she says, wrinkling her nose. "He seems like an absolute fraud."
I let out a loud laugh, the image of John's smirk fading into something completely harmless. "Oh. You mean John?"
"Yes," she says firmly. "That exact man."