19. Chapter 19
Doc showed up at Marissa”s door with a sandwich, a bottle of water, and two guards.
”How are you feeling?” he asked.
”Bored, sore, uncomfortable,” she said. ”Hungry, now that I see the food.”
”Cooper mentioned you might need it,” he said. ”No nausea? Vomiting?”
She shook her head. ”No, should I be?”
”It was a possibility,” he said. ”Not everybody deals with space flight well.”
Marissa shrugged as much as she was able. ”I”d be happier with a window to look out of but I don”t tend to get motion sickness.”
”Good to know. Want a sandwich?”
”Are you going to remove my restraints so I can eat it?”
”Nope but I will move them so it”s easier.”
One of the guards came over and adjusted her restraints so her hands were in front of her. She reached up and took the sandwich that Doc offered and groaned when she bit into it.
”That good, huh?” he said with a laugh.
”You have no idea,” she said. Two more bites and she closed her eyes in bliss while she chewed. She held up her hand for the water bottle and Doc opened it for her. With two long swallows, she”d nearly emptied it then leaned back and sighed.
”How”s Cooper?” she asked, then took another bite. She could see the medic weighing how much information to give her and let him think about it while she chewed.
”Hurt,” he finally said. ”Not by us. And space sick.”
”Who authorized the op?” she asked.
”You know we can”t-”
”I know I”m technically under suspicion until we get back to base but I also know that there were two very different attitudes about what had happened to me and what I was going to be facing when I got back. I just want a better view of the terrain.”
Doc sighed. ”The Base Commander authorized a rescue mission before any other instructions were received. I have no knowledge if he received any other instructions before we left or what they would have been if he had.”
Marissa nodded and released a sigh of relief. ”I”m guessing this is an Orvax ship?”
”An experimental one, from what I understand, and that”s just from talking to the pilot for a bit. I don”t pretend to understand half of what”s going on but I do know calls were made and strings were pulled to get you back.”
”Any chance I can see Cooper soon?” she asked.
He gave her a sharp look and she wondered how much he”d been briefed about what had happened. ”Do you want to see your kidnapper?”
”I”d like to see my mate,” she told him.
”Shit,” he muttered. ”How bad is it?”
”How bad is what?” she asked.
”The bond, connection, whatever. I know there are complications for a human with an Orvax but nobody seems to know what Cooper is.”
”Oh,” she said, and thought about it. ”I”m okay right now but I know that the longer we spend apart, the less that”s going to be true. We were separated almost as soon as we were brought into the caves and they tried to break-”
Tears spilled onto her cheeks before she realized she was crying. A weight she hadn”t realized had settled on her chest pressed harder and she gasped.
”Sooner rather than later,” Doc said. ”Got it. I”ll see what I can do.”
”I”m fine,” Marissa protested.
”You”re not,” Doc said softly. ”But we”re going to do our best to make sure you are. Got it, Major?”
”Got it, Doc,” she told him.
”So you have to tell me when you”re in pain and what parts of it are related to your bond with Cooper. Because I know fuck-all about how it works and I”m not about to hurt you worse because I don”t know something. Got it?”
Marissa nodded, curious about his intensity, but not willing to question it.
”Do you know how long it”s going to take to get us back to base?” she asked.
”A few hours and then we can get you into a more secure facility,” he said. ”Think you can hold out until then?”
”I think so.”
”Alright. You”ve got a guard on your door who can reach me if you let him know you”re hurting or in pain.”
”Check on Cooper, too?”
She hated how small her voice sounded even if she knew what was going on and why she felt this way. Nothing in her training had prepared her for the bond with Cooper and being stretched this thin.
”I”ll be checking on both of you during the ride back,” he told her. ”And searching for whatever information we can get on what”s going on with both of you.”
Marissa nodded. ”Should you be telling me this? I could be a security risk.”
”Are you a security risk?”
She started to shake her head then shrugged. ”Not intentionally but I”m still figuring out how it all works, too.”
”I don”t think telling you about protocols you”re already aware of will cause a problem,” Doc said. ”And I think it will help you relax and feel better to know that, at least on this ship, everybody wants to keep you safe and healthy.”
”Got it. Thanks, Doc,” she said.
He straightened and nodded to her. ”Call if you need anything,” he said as he left the room.
Marissa reached out for Cooper and found him right there in the back of her mind.
I”ve missed you, she told him.
I”m right here, he said. Doing my best not to eavesdrop but I couldn”t keep myself away from you any long.
How injured are you?
I”ve had worse, he said lightly. I”ve certainly had better but this isn”t the worst thing I”ve ever suffered through.
Will we be okay being separated for much longer? she asked. I”m already having trouble controlling my emotions.
I honestly don”t know, he said. I wish I could promise you that everything will be okay but we”re in unfamiliar territory right now.
How would your people handle this?
She could feel his hesitation and knew the answer before he told her.
My people probably would have executed us as part of the rescue. Or once they found out we were bonded. If there was a chance that I”d given you or our captors any information, they would have done their best to destroy us and them.
And you want to go home?
His hesitation was more pronounced this time.
It”s not a question of want, he said finally. I have to.
Marissa nodded even though she knew he couldn”t see her and withdrew. He wasn”t lying to her, he really wasn”t, but he also didn”t want to go home. He wanted to stay with her where they would be safe but he felt compelled to go back to a planet where they might be killed.
She knew she wasn”t thinking clearly but his insistence on returning home felt like a betrayal. Even if she couldn”t say how, his words had hurt her.
Marissa, don”t pull away from me, he begged. I need you to stay with me if we”re going to make it through this.
What”s the point?she asked. If you”re just going to go home, what”s the point of making it through this? We die now or we die later.
I”ll do my best to make sure that doesn”t happen, he said. Please. Give me a chance. Give us a chance to see what we”re capable of.
It hurts that you want to leave me.
I don”t want to leave you, he told her. And the last thing I”d ever want to do is hurt you.
She took a deep breath and tried to think through the pain pulsing in her heart. Her emotions were compromised and her ability to make a decision had gone with them. She knew that. Now was not the time to make a difficult decision.
What do you want to do to me? she asked him.
Right now I want to curl up around you and soothe every ache and pain I can feel in you, he said. Stroke your hair and let you fall asleep with your head on my chest.
That sounds lovely.
The heat of his response reached her before his words did. Then, when you wake up and you”re feeling better, I plan to make you ache in all new ways and places. Maybe eat you for breakfast and make you scream my name a few times.
Marissa could feel the flush moving up her cheeks with the images he sent her. Some of them from memory, some of them conjured from Cooper’s active and delicious imagination.
You”re going to get me in trouble, she told him.
Why? Did they leave your hands where you could do something with them?
The suggestions of what she could do with her hands were entirely visual and Marissa had to bite her lip to keep from gasping. She just hoped the guard on her door didn”t notice the change in her breathing.
Cooper, please, she begged, unsure of what she was actually asking him for.
Close your eyes and take a deep breath for me, he said.
Marissa did as she was told and felt her mind start to float as Cooper sent her image after image of him exploring her body. The joy he took in feeling her respond to his hands on her body, watching her face as pleasure washed over her, until she could feel them rush through her again.
She didn”t realize she”d made a noise until the guard at her door called her name. He”d opened the door and was looking in, concern and embarrassment written on his face.
”Are you all right?” he asked.
”I”m fine,” she said, embarrassment making the flush crawling up her neck turn into a flame of heat across her skin.
”You sure? I can get Doc back if you need him.”
”I”m sure,” she said. ”Just…thinking.”
The guard gave her a dubious look and closed the door.
What were you thinking about?Cooper asked, his voice in her head smug.
Shut up, I hate you.
No you don”t, he told her. Quite the opposite, actually.
The opposite of hate isn”t-
Marissa refused to think the next word. They were making the best of a bad situation, not developing feelings for each other. Weren”t they?
Forcing me into an orgasm isn”t fair, she said instead.
I didn”t force you into anything, he protested. I helped you focus on something besides spiraling emotions by sharing some of my favorite memories of you.
You”re an asshole.
Did it work?
That”s beside the point.
I”d prefer you on my point. His retort was accompanied by a vision of her with her head thrown back, her cheeks flushed, breasts swaying while she took her pleasure from him.
The flush that had been fading spread across her body again and she cursed at him. He chuckled and she caught a hint of relief. It occurred to her that he”d been hurt but she hadn”t found out how badly. She suspected he was teasing her to keep his mind off his injuries.
If you keep making me make noise, you”re going to get us caught,she told him.
Then you have my permission to cover your mouth, he said before sending her another flood of images.