Chapter 17
I'm falling in love with Sean. There's no way I can possibly deny it. He drove to my house in the middle of the night just because I told him I had a nightmare.
The way he tried to comfort me and stayed with me brought us even closer together.
My feelings for Sean absolutely terrified me. At this point, he could easily hurt me.
I think we might be moving too fast. Last night I slept in the same bed with him, which I've never done with anyone before.
We need to slow down because one day, he's going to realize I'm not as amazing as he thinks I am now. Once he realizes that, he'll leave me.
These were my thoughts shortly before I opened my eyes at the sound of my mom calling my name and found that I was the only one left in bed.
I knew it.
My eyes were watering from this realization but I couldn't let the tears fall.
Sean must've seen that I'm not good enough for him.
I knew it would happen, but I didn't think it'd be so soon.
Although, I guess I can see why he might've been disappointed with last night. I'm sure that he's used to doing more than just sleeping when he's in bed with a girl.
I bet he wasn't feeling patient enough to wait for me and he doesn't want to take things slow like I do.
I feel so stupid. Of course a guy like Sean wouldn't actually want me.
My mother interrupted my thoughts as she came into my room.
"Good morning, sweetie. Did you sleep alright? Honey, what's wrong? You look like you're about to cry." She said as she sat on the bed next to me and gave me a hug.
"I didn't sleep too great and I'm still just upset because of everything that happened yesterday." I said.
I wasn't totally lying to her because part of what I just said is true.
"I get it. I miss your brother too. It's sad that he died so young." She said.
"Yup."
Alright that last one was a lie, I don't miss Brandon.
"I came up to tell you that breakfast is done so you can come downstairs to eat when you're ready." She told me before getting up and leaving the room.
I heard a groan.
I look to the left and see Sean roll out from under my bed.
"How long have you been under there?" I asked.
I was relieved and happy to see that he hadn't actually left but I'm curious as to why he was hiding under my bed.
"I hid under the bed when I heard your mom calling your name. I didn't want her to see me here because last time she saw me it didn't go very well." He explained.
"Ok."
"I was afraid she'd never leave and I'd be stuck under your bed forever. It's a lot more comfortable on the bed instead of under, especially when you're laying with me." He said and laid back down by me.
I blushed.
"You're so cute when you blush." He complimented me.
Now I was blushing harder.
"Stop it." I whined.
"Stop what?" He asked acting clueless.
"You know what you're doing." I accused.
"I can't help it. I like seeing you blush." He said.
"Whatever."
"I should go now. Enjoy breakfast with your mom. I'll see you later. And remember, you can call me anytime you need me. On second thought, call me even if you don't need me." He kissed my forehead before hopping out of my window.
Maybe I was wrong about him. He doesn't seem like he's going to leave me. He's too sincere and kind to do that. But I don't think I'm ready to fully trust him just yet.
I walked downstairs to find that my mom had made me pancakes and bacon.
I sat down and she handed me a plate full of food.
"How are you holding up, pumpkin?" She asked me.
"Ok, I guess." I shrugged.
"That reminds me. I don't want you hanging out with that Sean boy anymore." She said.
"What? Why?"
"I don't approve of him. He killed my son." She stated calmly.
"He did that to protect me!" I shouted.
"Don't raise your voice at me. And anyway that's a lie." She said starting to look angry.
"No, it's not."
"Yes it is. How could you believe some stupid boy over your own mother?"
I stayed quiet because I really had nothing to say to that.
"Yeah, that's what I thought. You'll have to break up with him." My mom told me.
"You can't make me do that!" I screamed.
Things were going good with Sean and I. I couldn't ruin that now.
"Yes, I can! I'm your mother!" She yelled.
I turned and ran back to my room. Once I got there, I jumped on the bed and cried into my pillow.
I couldn't to break up with Sean.