21. Jet #2
“Gail wants to see me later this morning,” Elliott said. “I hate therapy sessions.”
“It’s a good thing to do after a traumatic experience. I’m going to see Dallas.”
Elliott met my eyes. In the morning light, I could see the many facets of green in them.
“I’m sorry you had a traumatic experience because of me,” he said sincerely.
“Nobody said I had to go after you. I made that decision all by myself.”
“Thank you.”
The heartfelt words flew straight to my heart, and I once again found myself unable to tear my eyes away from him as he turned his attention back to the goats that were nudging at him. His dark-blond hair rustled in the light breeze. His happiness made me happy.
Jet, you fool.
Elliott fed and watered the goats, and then I walked with him to the chicken coop where he donned his apron with the big front pocket and checked for eggs.
He was so damned cute. I wanted to hug him. I also wanted to kiss and fuck him.
Damn, I had it bad. What was I going to do?
“Elliott,” I said when we were on our way back to the ranch with the eggs.
“Hm?”
“Tomorrow’s Saturday. Want to go to the market in Jessup with me?”
Looking surprised, Elliott said, “O-o’kay. That would be fun.”
I suddenly felt like I didn’t need legs anymore; I could just float through the day.
***
I met Dallas in front of the ranch, and he took me to the office upstairs. After some pleasantries, Dallas asked me to describe what I went through when I’d gone looking for Elliott.
I explained that, being in the special ops, I was well trained and not easily traumatized.
My main thoughts when in the facility had been for Elliott’s safety.
He continued to ask me questions, and when he was satisfied that what had happened didn’t seem to have left a mark on me, he changed the topic to my feelings for Elliott.
Half-expecting it, I allowed myself to explore them. “Recently I’ve begun to realize that I started having feelings for Elliott that were more than friendship before he left the ranch.”
Dallas’s brow lifted, but he remained silent, letting me talk it out.
“At first, I thought I liked him so much because he reminded me of my little brother, Clayton.”
Dallas nodded. “You said as much in your last session with me.”
Right. I’d admitted to Dallas on that day that Elliott made me think of Clayton and that was probably why I’d been having nightmares about my brother.
“Well, let’s just say that I definitely don’t feel about Elliott like I would a brother.
I never did; I was just fooling myself because I had to work with him.
I’m attracted to him, even when on rut suppressants.
And after being off them for just a couple of days, I still was able to…
do what we were ordered to do at the facility. ”
“And now? Now that you and Elliott are back home? Your job here is done. You can leave if you want to.”
“My feelings haven’t changed. They’re growing stronger.”
“What are you going to do about them?”
“I’m consulting with Laura and Elise about what would be best,” I answered.
When I left Dallas’s office, I went by Laura’s office to check if she’d spoken to Elise yet. I was surprised to find Elise sitting with her.
“Jet, come in. Have a seat,” Laura said. “Elise and I have been talking about your situation with Elliott.”
As Elise and I were both alphas, our pheromones rose and met between us like two dogs sniffing one another before settling down again.
Elise smiled at me.
Pushing a strand of her dark, curly hair out of her face, she said, “Jet, first I want to thank you personally for putting your life on the line for Elliott.”
“It’s my job,” I said modestly.
“Yes, but this part of your job you did totally voluntarily. Thank you for that. Now, about what you told Laura…she and I both believe you may have unintentionally initiated a bond with Elliott when you had sex with him. But, if that’s so, it doesn’t mean you two have to mate.”
At those words, my heart began jumping in my chest. I couldn’t help but notice it was in excitement rather than concern. Elliott and I initiated a bond? The idea titillated my senses, causing a physical reaction. I crossed my legs, my hands falling to my lap.
Elise continued, “If you stay away from one another, you should be able to break the bond.” She looked at Laura, who nodded.
“Right. The relationship among Angus, Colt, and Ben began in a similar way, although sex wasn’t involved.
By comforting Ben when he was in a vulnerable state on the night that he arrived at the ranch, Angus initiated a bond without meaning to.
Colt may have done the same at some point, as he and Ben started having feelings for one another before they mated.
It’s difficult to say because people have feelings.
A bond only strengthens them. Angus, Colt, and Ben decided to mate.
But they could just as easily have distanced themselves from one another and allowed the bond to die, except Ben’s life was in danger. ”
Elise spoke again. “Your circumstances are slightly different, though, because you and Elliott had sex. However, the fact that you still had rut suppressants in your system and it’s unknown if Elliott was in heat or not at the time, means that a normal mating did not take place.”
“How can you know that for sure?” I asked when a pang of disappointment hit me at her words.
“If you and Elliott had mated, you wouldn’t be wondering about it. It would be obvious. For one thing, this soon after mating, you wouldn’t be able to leave each other for very long without Elliott feeling a great deal of upset.”
Upset? I told her about what had happened the night before.
“Hmm. Interesting. I still believe, though, that you formed a partial bond. What do you think, Laura?”
She nodded. “I think so, too.”
Turning back to me, Elise said, “In that case, you have the same choice as Angus and Colt had with Ben. Do you understand?”
I nodded. I could pursue Elliott if I wanted to mate him, or I could leave, and whatever tenuous bond we’d formed when we had sex would die.
I left Laura’s office with a lot to think about.