Chapter 14 #2
I wash her carefully. Her arms, her back, her hair. She leans into my touch, her eyes drifting closed. When I’m done, I rinse us both off and wrap us up in towels.
She starts to shiver now, the adrenaline and alcohol wearing off. I carry her to the bedroom and sit her down on the bed. In the dresser, I find one of her oversized shirts.
“Arms up.”
She obeys, and I pull the shirt over her head. It falls to the bed, covering her. I tuck her under the blankets, and she curls onto her side, watching me with those enormous eyes.
“Why are you doing all this?” The question is barely a whisper.
I crouch beside the bed, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear. “Because you shouldn’t think you’re unwanted, Violet.”
Her expression shutters. “I don’t want to talk about that.” She tries to sit up, but I put a hand on her shoulder, gently pushing her back down.
“Then don’t talk. Just listen.”
“Darius—”
“You’re important to me.” The words come out sounding rough, almost angry. “More than you know.” She tries to pull away from my hand, but I don’t release her. Her eyes flash with frustration, and I snap, “Why is that so hard to believe?”
“Because…” She stops. Looks away. Her jaw clenches.
I grip her shoulder tighter, willing her to look at me. “Why?”
She doesn’t answer immediately. Then, her expression turns so raw and painful that it makes my ribs feel like they’re being squeezed in a vise.
“The only people who’ve ever loved me are dead.
” Her voice is steady, accepting. “Everyone else just tolerates me because they have to. Because I’m the Alpha’s stepdaughter, and it would look bad to cast me out.
As for you”—she shrugs one shoulder—“I know you only want me because of the sex, for some reason. That’s all this is. ”
Her words devastate me. She thinks that’s all she is to me: a convenient release. A temporary fling that means nothing beyond physical satisfaction.
I let go of her shoulder and sit back on my heels. Shock renders me momentarily speechless.
She takes advantage of my silence to throw off the blankets and climb out of bed. She stumbles out of the bedroom, and I follow her, watching as she crosses to the living room, grabs her ruined pants off the floor, and clutches them to her chest.
“What if I prove it to you?” I find myself saying.
She stops in her tracks. Then, she lets out a heavy, exhausted sigh, turning to look at me.
“Why bother?” She shakes her head. “What will happen if I do believe you?” She walks over to me, still clutching her ruined pants. As she looks at me, misery takes over her expression. “What are you trying to do, Darius?”
I look down at her. At this woman who has no idea what she means to me. Who thinks she’s nothing when she is everything.
“I just want you to be happy.”
She laughs at that. The sound is soft and sorrowful and completely devoid of humor.
“I’m happy when you leave me alone,” she says matter-of-factly.
“When you don’t put me in danger of being further ostracized by the pack.
” She tosses the pants aside and folds her arms over her chest. “I may be the Alpha’s stepdaughter, but I have no status in our pack.
No worth. No future.” She gestures at me, holding out her hand in the space between us.
“And look at you. One day, you will be the leader of the pack. You will have a mate. You will have children. You will be a symbol of everything we all aspire to be.”
She steps closer. Her fingers reach up and pat my cheek with condescending gentleness.
“And I will always be nothing.” Her smile is sad and knowing.
“You expect me to believe you’d throw your future away over someone like me?
That you’d choose me over your pack? Your position?
Your father?” Her hand drops away. “No, you won’t.
I already told you. The day it comes to light that you’re lusting after your stepsister, I will be torn apart.
” Her voice drops to a whisper. “And you won’t help me because you’ll be too busy protecting yourself. ”
The words drive into my chest like knives, each one finding a target and twisting.
“That’s not true.” My voice comes out hoarse, strangled.
She gives me a soft, devastating smile. “It is, and you know it.” She walks past me, toward her bedroom door. “Go home, Darius. I’m not that good of a lay for you to ruin both our lives over it.”
She disappears into her room, and I watch as she closes the door. The lock clicks into place with a finality that makes my wolf howl in protest.
Still wearing nothing but a towel, I stand there for ten minutes. Maybe longer. I’ve lost track of time.
My heart feels unbearably heavy. Like someone reached into my chest and wrapped their fist around it, squeezing until I can’t breathe.
Finally, I force myself to move. My legs feel unsteady as I gather my clothes from where they’re scattered across her bathroom and living room floors. After pulling them on, I leave quietly.
The next morning, I can’t focus on the spreadsheet in front of me. The numbers blur together until they’re meaningless, and I find myself staring out the glass wall of my office for the third time in as many minutes.
She’s out there. Right now. Sitting at her desk, pretending nothing ever happened.
My jaw clenches as I remember the way she looked at me before closing her bedroom door. The stoic, impassive smile that cut me deeper than any blade. The resignation in her voice when she told me to leave.
“I’m not that good of a lay for you to ruin both our lives over it.”
The statement still hurts. Still makes pain and desperation rise in my throat. Because she genuinely believes that’s all she is to me. A convenient outlet for a physical need. A temporary and meaningless affair.
I force my attention back to the computer screen, but it’s useless. My wolf is restless, pacing beneath my skin. Demanding I go to her. Claim her properly where everyone can see.
But I can’t. Not when it would destroy her.
Movement catches my eye through the glass wall. Violet shifts in her chair, reaching for a file. Her movements are stiff, careful. Like she’s sore.
Heat floods through me at the memory of her body beneath mine. The sounds she made. The way she shattered in my arms.
She glances up. Our eyes meet through the glass for a split second before she looks away, color flooding her cheeks.
This is torture.
I scrub a hand over my face and try to focus on the quarterly reports that need my review. But five minutes later, I’m looking at her again.
She’s typing something, her brow furrowed in concentration. Then, she pauses. Her hand moves to her neck, fingers pressing against the marks I left there. The ones hidden beneath her collar.
My wolf rumbles with satisfaction.
She drops her hand quickly and glances toward my office. Catches me watching. This time, she doesn’t divert her gaze immediately. An odd look crosses her face before she turns back to her computer with deliberate focus.
This is going to be a long day.
The knock on my door makes me grateful for the distraction. “Come in.”
Ethan pushes through with two cups of coffee. He sets one on my desk and drops into the chair across from me with his usual casual ease, taking a sip of the other.
“You look like hell,” he observes.
“Thanks.”
He studies me over the rim of his cup. “How long are you planning to keep this up?”
I don’t pretend to misunderstand. “As long as I have to.”
“Darius.” His voice drops, becoming serious. “You can’t keep denying the bond. It’s going to eat you alive.”
“I’m not denying anything.” I lean back in my chair, the leather creaking. “I’m protecting her.”
“By sleeping with her but refusing to actually claim her?” Ethan shakes his head. “That’s not protection. That’s torture. For both of you.”
My hands tighten on the armrests. “You don’t understand.”
“Then explain it to me.”
I stare at him. Ethan is one of the few people I trust completely. The only one who knows what Violet is to me. And he hasn’t judged me for it.
“She told me something last night.” The words come out rushed. “She said when it comes to light that I’m lusting after my stepsister, she’ll be”—I search for the phrase she used—“torn apart. And I won’t help her because I’ll be too busy saving myself.”
Ethan nods slowly. “She thinks you’ll abandon her.”
“She has convinced herself that I will.” I run a hand through my hair. “And the worst part is, she’s not entirely wrong. If the pack were to find out about us, she’d bear the brunt of it. She has no status. No protection beyond being the Alpha’s stepdaughter, and even that means nothing.”
“So, what’s your plan? Keep sleeping with her in secret until…what? Until she finds another mate? Until you’re forced to take one?”
The thought makes my wolf snarl. I shake my head sharply. “I don’t have a plan.”
“You need one.” Ethan leans forward. “Because this half measure you’ve landed on? It’s not sustainable. And it’s not fair to her.”
“Nothing about this situation is fair to her.”
“Then change it.” His voice is firm now, challenging. “You’re going to be the alpha one day. Act like it. Choose her.”
His words throw me for a loop. “It’s not that simple.”
“It is that simple. It’s just not easy.” Ethan holds my gaze. “Look, I get it. Your father, the pack, the politics of it all. But at the end of the day, she’s your fated mate. Your wolf knows it. You know it. And eventually, she’s going to figure it out.”
“She can’t feel the bond.”
“Not yet. But you said her wolf is stirring, right? It’s only a matter of time before she does feel it. And when that happens, what are you going to tell her? That you knew all along but decided she wasn’t worth the hassle?”
The accusation lands hard, compressing my lungs. Before I can respond, the door to my office opens.
My father stands in the doorway, his expression unreadable.
Ethan glances between us, then stands smoothly. “I should get back to work.” He nods to my father as he passes, closing the door quietly behind him.