Chapter 24 Evan
EVAN
Four days have passed, and I’ve not seen Caleb.
I didn’t expect to end up in a hotel room with him, I didn’t expect to sleep beside him, and I didn’t expect him to find out about my self-harming.
Everything he said made my head tight and fuzzy.
He might be telling the truth about wanting to make this work, but I can’t believe him until I see it. I understand his fears about his father; I definitely wouldn’t want to get on the wrong side of him.
Today’s the day we’re training together. My body immediately starts to itch with worry. I know we can’t act like we’re mates around people, but I don’t know what that’s going to do to my wolf.
“Let’s go, guys,” Jaxon shouts. “Caleb and his pack are meeting us by the stream.”
Even hearing his name makes the hairs on my arms stand. Ava watches me carefully from across the clearing as she smiles supportively.
We follow Jaxon to the stream, and I keep myself at the back and attempt to control my breathing.
Caleb’s scent hits me like a tonne of bricks.
I spot him from afar as he laughs with Felix, his arms crossed over his chest with a fitted black T-shirt clinging to his body, showcasing his impressive biceps.
Biceps that are bigger than my head. My mouth waters at the sight.
Caleb’s attention is turned towards Jaxon and the rest of us behind him. He seems in better spirits today. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him smile the way he is right now.
But the first thing I notice is he looks everywhere but me.
My hands clasp together, and I pick at the skin around my nails.
I don’t look away from him as he steps towards Jaxon and Kayden, falling into conversation.
I wasn’t expecting him to run up and hug me, but an acknowledgement would have been nice.
Jaxon announces we’re going to train in our human forms today. My blood runs cold because I’m much weaker in my human form, and it’s shameful. I glance back at Caleb, but his eyes are focused on the ground. Anger bubbles inside my stomach.
Coward, I think to myself.
Caleb gives us the head start for once, and before Jaxon has even moved, I dart off through the trees, away from them.
Blood rushes through my ears as I push myself harder than I ever have. I say this every time, but it’s probably because it feels like I’m dying when I can’t catch my breath.
Once I reach the edge of our territory, I stop by a tree and press my palm against the bark. I inhale rapidly and tell myself not to throw up before we’ve even begun.
I start walking around the perimeter, past our guards who keep our territory safe. My head twitches with a thousand different thoughts, and I almost scream at myself for them to go away.
I told you so.
I told you so.
I told you so.
My feet carry me for what feels like years. Buried so deeply inside my own thoughts, I don’t even feel the presence of someone behind me. Hands rest over my waist, and I’m tugged backwards, a shriek leaving my lips. Gasoline surrounds me in an instant.
My back is pinned against the nearest tree as Caleb towers over me, eyes dark and unreadable. I gulp as I look up at him and the curves of his handsome face.
“You know I don’t appreciate you calling me a coward,” he says, voice heavy and unimpressed.
Well, shit. I didn’t realise I actually sent the thought to his mind instead.
“What am I supposed to think when you won’t even look at me?” I murmur deeply.
Caleb curses and lowers his head, then after a few moments, he raises it once more, and the darkness in his eyes begins to subside. “Don’t you realise that you make me lose all focus?”
My heart hammers against my ribcage.
“Thinking about you is dangerous,” he grunts. “Looking at you is dangerous.”
I narrow my eyes. “Dangerous?”
“Yes.”
“How?”
“Because all I want is to fucking kiss you.” He places his hand on the tree above my head.
I blink in surprise as he cups my cheek and drags his thumb over my mouth. His eyes drop as he tugs my bottom lip down and groans softly.
“They’re taunting me.”
I pant at his words—not so subtly.
“It’s not like we can be around each other without people getting suspicious,” I whisper. “You said so yourself.”
“We’ll find a way.”
I frown. “How?”
“I’ll figure something out, pups.”
The sound of rustling alerts us, and Caleb steps back, his hand dropping to his side. I immediately miss the warmth of his touch and how alive it makes me feel.
It's almost like I can live again.
“I’ll be seeing you soon,” he says.
“How soon?”
I cringe at the desperation in my voice, and he knows it.
The corner of his lip twitches. “Don’t worry, you’ll have me all to yourself.”
A second later, he’s gone, like a flash of lightning.
I push myself away from the tree and glance around, my chest heaving rapidly.
My mouth tingles, and I raise my fingers to graze over the spot he touched.
No matter how hard I try to stay strong around him, I melt like butter, and I’m starting to give in to my thoughts.
As I stand in my bedroom and face the long mirror, I stare down at my wrists. My thumb grazes over the scarred skin, and I sigh.
He knows.
I close my eyes for a second before there is a knock at my bedroom door. My entire body jolts, and I shove down the sleeve of my jumper. “Yeah?”
Ava pokes her head around the corner. “Hey,” she says softly.
“Hey, you okay?”
She nods. “Yeah, you?”
“I’m alright. What’s up?”
“So Jaxon has suggested that a few of our pack go into the town district and help out with duties.”
My brows pinch. “What sort of duties?”
“They’re renovating a new children’s home and need help with decorating, organising donations, things like that. It’ll be good for the community and all the kids.”
“Okay.”
“I was wondering if you wanted to be a part of it? Get out of the house for a bit. I thought it might be something you’re interested in now that you’re not helping out at Caleb’s much anymore.”
I ponder for a second. I don’t do lots around the pack house. Jaxon never really gave me many duties because he probably doesn’t think I’m strong enough to do anything else.
“I can tell him no,” she says as she waves her hands.
“No.” I straighten my spine. “I’ll do it.”
Her smile widens. “Yeah?”
“It’ll be nice to help others.”
Might help the Moon Goddess to forgive me—if she ever will.
“Great.” She grins. “I’ll let Jaxon know. Thanks, Evan.”
“No worries,” I say as she leaves my room.