15 Roman
Roman
I didn’t know what I was thinking, or why I’d just disobeyed a direct order. Though—technically—I hadn’t broken any rules. I’d kept her out of the public eye. No one was filming in the hospital. But something about Meg made me reckless.
I’d gone back to work after the doctor’s report and spent the last twenty-four hours beating myself up for not being able to do more for my father. Then I’d crashed into Meg on the stairs and saw the sadness in her pretty eyes.
And I…
I wasn’t sure what came over me.
The rain had stopped since we got here. Daylight peeked through the blinds, casting a golden glow on the side of Meg’s face as she read to my father in that perfect voice of hers.
That was the first thing I’d noticed about her.
If anything would make Dad listen, it was a pretty girl telling a story.
Meg had a voice that could command an army and simultaneously soothe a small child.
She picked up the dialogue of the characters, using silly tones with no concern of who might judge her for it.
There was a strength and steadfastness in her presence, like it didn’t matter what came her way, she’d handle it.
She was everything a woman should be. Everything I never knew I wanted. I was mesmerized by her lips and the way they moved, barely hearing the words of the story. Some romance novel where the male main character took too long to acknowledge his feelings.
The guy was a fool.
If I lived in a world where I was free to do what I wanted, I wouldn’t waste a second of my life.
Science, even Justus was an idiot for letting a woman like Meg slip through his fingers. He didn’t deserve her. None of them did. I had to put a stop to this. Allowing her to sacrifice herself for people who’d gladly throw her in the trash compactors was cruel. Somehow, I’d find a way to—
“Lieutenant Miller, a word?” Sally poked her head into the room.
“Should I stop?” Meg put her hand on the book.
“No, dear, you keep going.” Sally offered her an encouraging smile as she motioned to the vital sign display screen. “I think he likes this one. We’ll only be a minute. It’s just some paperwork we need to take care of.”
Meg’s eyes met mine before she continued, and I hated the ingrained feeling of shame that washed over me. I knew what was coming.
Councilwoman Troy may have been the one footing the bill, but as my father’s last living kin, it was me that signed off on everything. Seeing that itemized bill every quarter was as effective as any leash.
That massive number kept him alive. Kept up the slight bit of hope that this expensive treatment might someday bring back the man he’d once been.
The monthly bill was more than I made in a year.
“If you want to go over the charges, you can find the codes here.” The nurse spoke softly, not meeting my eyes.
I added my name to the signature line without looking.
“Should we continue forwarding the bill to the Troy house?”
I nodded once; voice stuck in my throat. What could I say? I’d been saving every extra cent I earned in my military career, and I only had enough for maybe half a year of treatment. That was as long as nothing changed.
One misstep. One bad night with drastic life-saving measures needed. One new test to run…
I wouldn’t be able to cover the following day.
“Sorry. You know the drill. I have to ask.” Sally whisked the signed paperwork out of sight. “You should bring your fiancé around here more often. Her voice livens up the halls.”
A cold pit opened in my chest. “She’s not my fiancé.”
“Oh no?” Sally cringed in embarrassment. “My mistake. I assumed when I saw the ring.”
Bitterness coated my tongue as I turned away.
I couldn’t even afford to keep my own father alive. How could I pay for a ring like that for a girl as pretty as Meg?
The knot twisting in my gut grew tighter as we said our goodbyes. Meg climbed into the front seat next to me, chewing her bottom lip as we drove in silence back to the government housing district.
All the while, I berated myself for doing this.
No matter what the nurses had said about my father’s brain waves and needing more human connection, or that it was almost like I had brought him a real gift.
That seeing Meg next to him had done something to me, giving me a hope I hadn’t felt in a long time.
This was dangerous. Reckless. I had no clue what I was thinking. If the council or the colonel found out…
“You don’t take anyone else to see him?” Meg broke through my brooding thoughts. It wasn’t an accusatory question, but it felt like one.
Still, I couldn’t lie. “No. He wouldn’t want anyone to see him that way.”
“He’s your father,” she said.
I smiled sadly. “What gave it away?”
“The eyebrows… The nose.” She turned in her seat to face me. “The fact that the two of you smell like family.”
“You can smell that?” It was almost too easy to forget there were differences between us when she acted so human. Not that her beauty was normal by human standards, but she didn’t present in the way we were told mutants behaved.
“There’s more they don’t tell you,” Dad always said. “Question everything.”
“I can smell a lot of things.” Meg stopped talking as I rolled down my window to show the security guard my badge, and waited until we drove through. “Are you going to get in trouble for bringing me outside today?”
I didn’t know how she knew that. But she seemed like an intuitive woman. I also didn’t know how to answer the question. Time was slipping away from us fast, though. The Troy house loomed up ahead. I found myself not wanting our time to be over.
“What else can you smell that we can’t?” I teased, hoping to end today on a good note at least.
Meg’s smile fell. “Nothing.”
I should’ve left it at that. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Before I could put the car in park, Meg pushed open the door. “Thanks for taking me out. I had a good time today.”
I should’ve left her alone. She’d done enough for me. For all of us. I’d promised myself to stay away unless orders dictated otherwise.
Three seconds was all I lasted before I pushed open my own car door and followed her up the stairs. “What else do you smell, Meg?”
“It’s really nothing.” She entered the house.
Not my house. Not my threshold.
Yet I chased her across it anyway, straight up the grand staircase that wasn’t mine, following a woman who wasn’t mine to follow.
All rational thought was fleeting, and I needed to know what she meant. “Is it something bad?”
I imagined that was why she ran. Why she couldn’t look me in the face.
Meg stopped at the top of the stairs, glancing over her shoulder at her bedroom door, and seemed to come to some sort of decision as her shoulders fell. “How long has he been like that?”
Her question brought me straight back to the night I’d found him on the floor of our one-room flat after another late night at work. I was sixteen. Not old enough to be considered an adult. Young enough to bawl my eyes out in the hospital room when they told me he might never recover.
“Nine years,” I whispered, as if not speaking it out loud would soothe some of the pain.
Meg nodded. “And you’re… paying to keep him like that?”
“It’s complicated.” My jaw clenched.
She didn’t understand what she was asking, and she sure as hell didn’t know how scientific advancement worked. Sure, he was in a stasis now, but any day the doctors would break through with a new discovery. The treatment would work better. He’d be okay.
“I do understand.” Her hand rested on my forearm and I felt that warmth rush through me again at being touched by someone who seemed to care.
Meg’s worried eyes searched my face. “I’d do anything for my family. You’re a good son. I bet your father loves you as much as you do him.”
I don’t know what possessed me.
I watched it happen as if it were someone else’s story. A main character taking what he wanted. The urge so strong it forced my muscles to act.
My fingers laced through the back of her hair and my other hand grabbed her hip, needing to hold her close with an intensity I’d never felt before.
I hesitated with my lips hovering just above her lips, finding a moment of clarity when she gasped at my sudden touch.
“I’m sorry… I shouldn’t…”
“Stop apologizing,” Meg growled, her eyes blown with a desire that made me forget every piece of training I’d ever endured and forced me weak in the knees. She laced her hands behind my neck and closed the distance between our lips.
I stole her breath as mine for a moment that I wanted to pause in time.
Then her sweet taste exploded on my tongue as I kissed her, drinking deep and pouring my soul into that kiss. It left no doubt of what I wanted. And, curse science, I wanted this woman more than I had any right to want anything.
My fingers fisted her hair as I pressed us closer together, needing to feel every inch of her touching me. Damn it all. Damn the consequences.
The consequences…
Meg broke our kiss as if she could sense my thoughts, breathing heavy as she clung to the front of my shirt. “That was… Wow.”
Blood pounded in my ears.
“Wait. Don’t go,” Meg pleaded, still holding on to me.
I caught her wrists and held them against my racing heart a moment more. “This is a mistake.”
“It isn’t,” she rushed to say. “You don’t understand. This is meant to be. There’s something I have to tell you, and it’ll all make sense.”
“Don’t say anything else,” I hissed, dropping her hands as I took a step back. “I made a mistake, Miss Meg. I apologize for taking advantage of you.”
“That’s not what happened.” She shook her head.
“It is.” My tone left no room for argument.
The hurt on her face would haunt me for the rest of my life as I said, “I promise this won’t happen again.”
Meg gripped her chest as if I’d stabbed her there, but I had no time to explain.
“Roman, are you here?” Helen’s voice rang out in the front hall, no doubt having seen my car parked outside.
I hardened my heart as I took another step away from Meg, putting more distance between us.
“Please wait,” she whispered.
But it was already too late.
I took one last look at her pretty, devastated face—committing this moment to memory and knowing I’d never get one like it again—before I glanced up at the camera above her bedroom door.
Science, what have I done?