Chapter 16
Chapter Sixteen
Anne
I went to bed last night worried about Kain and how sick he’d seemed.
Every time I closed my eyes, I saw his face—pale, sweating, gripping the back of the car like it was the only thing keeping him upright. The way he’d tried to smile through whatever was clearly causing him pain. The fever burning in his skin when I’d touched his forehead.
It was clear he was ill and just trying to act strong.
But this morning, when I saw him in the elevator, he seemed fine. Better than fine, actually. He kissed me, smiled at me, promised he was okay. The worry that had been eating at me all night finally started to ease.
Maybe it really was just food poisoning. Maybe I was overreacting.
Still, I can’t shake the need to check on him. To see for myself that he’s really okay. I sent a text to him earlier, suggesting we grab lunch, but he wasn’t available, so I had lunch with Sienna.
I’m still worried though, so I decide to pay him a visit. I’m a few steps from the elevator banks when David rounds the corner ahead of me.
My steps falter. He sees me at the same moment, and his expression shutters.
He doesn’t smile. Doesn’t acknowledge me at all.
Just looks away and keeps walking as if I’m invisible.
He gets in an elevator and presses a button without waiting for me.
The other elevators all show that they’re moving away from my floor.
I press my lips together, guilt twisting in my chest.
I deserve that.
I push the thought away and continue toward Kain’s office, taking the stairs instead of waiting for one of the elevators to come back down. I’m just about to exit the stairwell onto his floor when I see him rushing into an elevator, seeming desperate.
A frown creases my brow. Where is he off to in such a hurry?
I walk over to the elevator and see that it is going down.
My frown deepens. Does he maybe feel sick and want to go home?
Assuming he is headed all the way down to the lobby, I take off after him in the next elevator.
I walk out to the parking lot just in time to hear his voice coming from around the corner of the building, agitated and sharp.
It seems like he’s on the phone with someone.
I stop in my tracks when he says, “It’s not that simple.” He sounds frustrated. “The hybrid is never alone. The Alpha watches her constantly. I’m working on it.”
The hybrid? Is he talking about Violet?
My blood turns to ice. What did I just hear? Why is Kain discussing my friend’s whereabouts like that?
The person on the other end of the line says something that makes Kain even more upset.
“Anne? She doesn’t matter to me. I already told you, she’s just useful for getting close to the hybrid!” he exclaims.
I stumble back a step, feeling like I’ve gotten cold water splashed in my face.
“Just useful.”
Blood rushes away from my head so fast, it makes me lightheaded. The parking lot spins, and I can’t breathe. Can’t think. I’m taking another step away when Kain’s voice reaches my ears one more time.
“Of course I have to spend time with her, but it’s all fake! The mission is what’s important, and I’m doing what I need to do to maintain my cover!”
That is the final blow. He may as well have stabbed me in the heart with a wolfsbane-laced, silver blade.
I step back into the building as quietly as possible, my legs moving on autopilot even though I feel like I could collapse at any moment.
“Just useful.”
The words echo in my skull, over and over, each repetition cutting deeper. I get in an elevator and smash all the buttons, not caring what floor, and rush toward a bathroom once the doors open.
There is no explanation for what I have just heard. Kain’s words were as plain as day, yet I struggle to make sense of them.
Bile rises in my throat, and I fall to my knees in a stall, vomiting my lunch in violent hacks that burn my chest.
When my stomach is empty, I gag over the toilet pitifully, but nothing more comes out of me. I flush and drag myself to the sinks so I can wash out my mouth and splash water on my face.
When I look up, my reflection in the mirror distorts. I think I’m in shock.
I need to get out of here. I can’t go back to my desk in this state. I can’t risk having others ask me what’s wrong…
Not wanting to run into Kain in an elevator, I head to the stairwell. I barely make it before my legs give out. I grip the railing, gasping for air that won’t come, my vision blurring at the edges.
This can’t be happening. My heart can’t be burned and broken again. Not again.
But it is happening. I heard him. I heard every word.
“The hybrid.”
He’s after Violet. And I’m useful. A means to an end. A tool to get close to his real target.
Everything—the flowers, the apologies, the way he looked at me and listed all the little things he’d noticed about me—all of it was a lie.
I stumble down the stairs, barely feeling my feet hit each step. I pray to the Goddess that Kain is not still down there, and she is merciful: the parking lot is empty when I arrive. I make it to my car, my hands shaking so badly that I drop my keys twice before managing to unlock the door.
I collapse behind the wheel and just sit there, staring at nothing, trying to process what I heard.
Kain is some kind of spy. He’s here for Violet. And he is using me to get to her.
I start hyperventilating, my breath coming in short, sharp gasps. The car feels too small, the air too thin. I grip the steering wheel as tightly as I can, trying to anchor myself to something, anything.
I was finally happy. I thought that I’d gotten him back, that we were building a relationship. But it was all deception. My hopes are dashed. Again.
My phone buzzes. A text from Kain.
I’m sorry we couldn’t get lunch together, babe. And I’m going to be busy after work. Can I text you tomorrow?
My hands start shaking. If I hadn’t overheard his call, I wouldn’t suspect a thing.
But now I know. He’s dangerous. Whatever he’s planning for Violet, it can’t be good. And I’ve been so stupid, so desperate to have him back, that I didn’t see it.
I love Violet too much to risk her safety. I need to tell someone…I need to tell Darius. Need to warn—
No. No, I can’t.
If I tell Darius, he’ll kill Kain. I know he will. He never hesitates when it comes to Violet’s safety. He doesn’t show mercy to threats against his mate.
And Kain is a threat. A traitor. But he’s also mine.
My wolf whines as though echoing my pain. He’s my mate! The man I mourned for ten years! I just got him back; how can I have him ripped from me again so brutally?
A sob tears out of my throat, raw and ugly.
How can I choose? How can I possibly choose between my fated mate and my best friend?
My hands are still trembling as I start the engine. I pull out of the parking lot with no destination in mind, just needing to move, to do something besides sit here and fall apart.
Maybe there’s another way. Maybe I can talk to Kain first, confront him, make him explain. Maybe I misunderstood. Maybe…
But I didn’t misunderstand. His words were clear.
“Anne? She doesn’t matter to me…she’s just useful…”
I drive without seeing, my vision fuzzy from tears. Traffic lights pass in a haze of color. Streets blur together. I don’t even know where I’m going until I’m already there.
The Alpha’s house.
I am stopped across the street from Darius and Violet’s home. The engine is still running, my foot on the brake but ready to hit the gas.
My heart pounds in my chest. What am I doing here?
I should leave. I should drive away, figure this out on my own, find a solution that doesn’t put Kain in jeopardy.
But what other solution is there? He’s after Violet. He said it. And I can’t protect her. I can’t fight off Kain or whoever sent him all by myself.
And doesn’t the fact that I’m sitting here mean that I know what I’m supposed to do? Subconsciously, I’ve made my choice.
My breathing gets faster. Too fast. I’m hyperventilating again, my chest tight, spots dancing at the edges of my vision as blood rushes in my ears.
I can’t do this. I can’t condemn Kain to his death. I can’t—
A knock on my window makes me jump so high, I nearly hit my head on the roof. Darius is standing there, bent over and looking at me, a brow raised in question.
What? When did he…How long have I been sitting here?
He gives me a confused, slightly irritated frown, and I whip my face away from him to stare at the wheel in panic.
No. No, he can’t be here. Not now. I’m not ready. I haven’t decided—
He knocks again, and out of the corner of my eye, I see him gesturing for me to roll down the window. My hand moves without permission and presses the button. The window slides down.
“Ms. Donaldson.” Darius sounds like he’s trying to be patient. “Is there a reason you’ve been sitting outside my gates for the past thirty minutes? Shouldn’t you be at work?”
The words explode out of me without permission. “Kain is trying to hurt Violet!”
Darius’s expression immediately hardens, his glare pinning me in place. “What?”
He scrutinizes my face for a moment. My devastation must be evident because he seems to take me seriously. He straightens up and pulls out his phone.
“Ethan. Where’s Kain right now?”
I can’t hear the response, but Darius’s jaw tightens.
“Keep eyes on him. Don’t let him leave the building. And tell Violet to come home. Now.”
He ends the call and turns back to me. “Leave the car here and follow me inside.” His alpha command reverberates against my soul, and I find myself obeying meekly, even though I just want to go home and cry.
In his office, I tell him everything I heard. Darius’s reaction is just as scary as I expected.
“And you did not notice anything prior to this, correct?” His voice is urgent as he begins interrogating me now.
My already broken heart stutters in my chest. “N-no sir. I did not notice anything before today. He’s my mate; I—I thought he loved me.” Hot tears of shame stream down my face. “I’m sorry. I am so sorry. I should have seen it…”
There’s a knock at the door, and Darius’s inspecting gaze leaves me. Violet enters without waiting for permission, concern written all over her face.
“Darius? What’s going on? Why did—” She rushes over when she sees me. “Anne? What are you doing here? What happened?”
I swallow hard. I dread seeing my friend’s face when she learns that I’d found out I was being used to get close to her and yet struggled to disclose the fact.
Protective as always, Darius moves to Violet’s side, his hand immediately going to the small of her back. “There’s a situation. I need you to stay here with Anne while I handle it.”
“What kind of situation?” Violet’s eyes dart between us.
“It’s Kain.” Darius’s voice is flat. “Anne just reported him for being a spy here to capture you.”
Violet’s face drains of color. She looks at me, shock and worry warring in her expression. Her voice is small, when she says, “Anne?”
I turn away, unable to speak.
Violet’s tone turns sharp. “She’s crying, Darius. What did you do to her?”
Darius becomes gentle in a way he only is with her. “I asked her one question before you got here. I needed to be sure.”
Violet chastises him immediately. “She’s my friend! She reported her fated mate to try to protect me. Why would you interrogate her?”
Faced with his mate’s displeasure, Darius reluctantly softens.
“You’re right. I’m sorry, my love.” A sigh leaves his lips.
“I’ll go deal with this,” he says, already moving toward the door.
He pauses as he passes me, placing a heavy hand on my shoulder.
When I look up at him, he sighs. “I’m sorry, Anne. ”
Fresh tears spring to my eyes. “I’m sorry, too.”
He nods once, then he’s gone, the door closing behind him with a finality that makes my lips tremble.
“Anne?” Violet’s tone is tentative as she crouches down next to me.
I finally look at her again. Her expression is clouded with concern, just as I thought it would be. I can tell she feels sorry for me.
“Vi—” That’s all I can say before my throat closes up and I’m full-blown sobbing.
Violet wraps her arms around me. “Anne, I’m so sorry. I know what he means to you. I know—”
The kindness in her voice breaks me. “He lied,” I gasp out between sobs. “It was all fake. He—” I can’t finish. Can’t get the words past the grief that is choking me.
“I’m so sorry,” Violet says again, her eyes glistening with unshed tears at my pain.
“I really thought—” My voice comes out broken, jagged. “I thought I had him back. I thought we were going to be happy. That maybe after all the years of pain, I could finally…”
But I can’t finish because there is no “finally.” There’s just this. This seemingly endless cycle of finding him and then losing him, over and over again.
“I had to choose,” I wail. The pain is eating me alive. “I had to choose between him and you, and I chose you, but it feels like I’m dying, Violet! It feels like my heart is being ripped out of my chest, and I can’t—I can’t—”
“Breathe with me,” Violet says urgently, squeezing my hands. “Anne, look at me. Breathe with me.”
But I can’t. Darius’s office is spinning. The walls are closing in. There’s not enough air.
“I love him,” I choke out. “I love him, but I just sentenced him to death, and I’ll never—we’ll never—”
The room tilts violently. Violet’s face goes out of focus.
“Anne? Anne, are you okay?”
I’m not okay. I’ll never be okay again.
The last thing I hear is Violet crying out my name. Then, darkness takes me, and I’m grateful for it.