Chapter 18 #2
“Like that?” His eyes narrow. “You didn’t have a problem with me when I had you under me last night.”
My lips part, and I glower at him. “That was—You can’t—”
Marcus is off his knee before I’ve finished.
His mouth comes down on mine, both hands framing my face, and the chair scrapes back as he hauls me onto my feet.
I get a palm to his chest to shove him off, then I fist his shirt instead and drag him closer.
A sound rolls out of his throat that I feel through my own ribs.
His hand slides into my hair, tipping my head where he wants it, while every sensible thing I said burns down to ash.
Footsteps hit the stairs.
We come apart so fast that I hit my hip on the table. Marcus turns to the counter and grips the edge, while I smooth my hair with trembling hands.
“Don’t,” I hiss at him. “We’re keeping this civil. Stop trying to kiss me every five minutes.”
“I’m trying.” He doesn’t look repentant. “I’ve been doing a remarkable job of restraining myself, all things considered.”
“Mom, is breakfast ready?” Mia bounces into the room, Bella a step behind her.
“It will be in half an hour. You girls go change.” It’s hard to keep my voice steady.
As they rush off, I let out a shaky breath. “Fine. I’ll turn down the job offer. But you can’t—You and I can’t do that again. This is for Mia. So she can stay in your life and you can stay in hers.”
When he doesn’t answer, I look at him. There’s a stubborn tilt to his chin, and my heart sinks. This man who’s been strangely agreeable about everything so far refuses to budge on one thing: me.
“I need an answer, Marcus.”
He walks past me, his hands ghosting over my waist, and my eyes flutter shut for a moment. His voice is amused and dismissive. “We’ll see.”
When I open my eyes, he’s long gone, and I’m standing alone in the kitchen.
I let out a quiet groan.
I still have to go to work, and the girls still have school. But today I’m incredibly distracted.
Why wasn’t he angry?
The thought eats at me. He should have been at least a little bit miffed that I kept his daughter away from him, even if he’d known for a while. So why wasn’t he?
I had expected threats to take Mia away, accusations, anything.
But I didn’t expect the compromise, the reassurances.
I look away from my computer, my head hurting.
I told him he and I should keep a distance, but it’s so hard to not let my feelings get in the way.
Marcus makes no sense to me. But being around him, it feels like I can do anything.
I’ve always chased a sense of security, and I found it in my work, in my income, in my apartment.
I was grounded. But when I’m with Marcus, despite my wariness about him and my fears, there’s always been this sense of safety.
I never felt this even once when I was with Derek, but with this charming, unpredictable man, I want to set down the burdens that I’m always carrying.
I want to share them with him. His house has felt more like home than the apartment does.
I groan quietly.
This man doesn’t do anything like I expect him to. How am I supposed to deal with him?
The day passes slowly, and I barely get anything done. By the time I’m about to leave, I get a message from Marcus: Something’s come up. Collect both girls and take them to the house. I’ll be late.
I wonder what’s so urgent that he had to leave the academy, but then I’ve noticed that he’s been stressed lately.
Marcus rarely talks about his problems or concerns, and I’ve never asked, not wanting to pry into his matters.
But as I stare at the message, my fingers hover over the screen, a part of me wanting to ask if everything is okay.
Finally, I sigh and tuck the phone away, making my way to the car. I’m fortunate that the academy is a ten-minute drive from my office. By the time I get there, classes are already over and parents are lined up in their cars.
The carpool line crawls. I’m four cars back when my phone lights up with Rachel’s name.
“Hey, you,” I answer, smiling.
“Jessa.” Her voice climbs half an octave. “Are you home? Please tell me you’re home.”
I sit up straight. “No, I’m in the pickup line. What’s happened?”
“Jared came to the building last night.” Rachel’s breath saws down the line. “He was screaming in the hall, hammering on my door, until Mrs. Okafor threatened him with the police. I got the kids out at six this morning. We’re at the shelter on Ninth.”
My hands tighten on the wheel. “Are you hurt? Did he touch the kids?”
“Nobody’s hurt, though we’re shaken.” Her voice is shaking. “I ran with nothing. The baby has one change of clothes, and Danny left his inhaler on the counter. I can’t leave because he’s got too many friends. I don’t want to be tracked here.”
“Tell me what you need. I’ll pack it up for you and drop it over.”
“You’d do that?” She sounds so surprised that I want to break something.
“Rachel.” I put my forehead against the wheel. “Tell me what you need, then tell me where you keep the key.”
The list comes through as a text. Her key is taped under the rim of the potted plant in the hallway, where nobody thinks to look, so I promise her twenty minutes.
The girls tumble into the back seat, all noise. Mia has better color than she’s had in a week, and she’s halfway through a play-by-play of a lunchtime game before her belt clicks.
“I got it off Theo, went round the outside, and Coach says I’ve got a left foot he’d pay money for.”
“Theo cried,” Bella supplies, loyal to the end.
“Theo always cries.” Mia leans forward between the seats. “Mom, are we going to Marcus’s?”
“We are.” I pull out of the lot. “Bella, sweetheart, can I stop at our apartment first? It’ll take ten minutes at the most.”
“I want to come up.” Mia grabs my shoulder. “My books are in there. The horse one. Bella hasn’t seen it yet.”
“Fine. You two wait in our apartment.” I catch Mia in the mirror. “Stay inside. Don’t come into the hall or onto the stairs.”
“I promise,” she groans, while Bella nods along beside her.
I park on the street and call Marcus. It rings out to voicemail.
“Marcus, it’s me. I’ve brought the girls to my apartment for ten minutes. I’m picking up Rachel’s things because she’s at a shelter and needs clothes for the kids. The girls will be inside my place the whole time.”
I let the girls into my apartment. “Grab what you need and stay here. Mia, if there is anything perishable in the fridge, put it in a bag, and we’ll take it with us. Now I mean it. Stay here.”
“We get it, Mom.” Mia rolls her eyes, and I close the door behind me.