Chapter Five #2
Tobin shut the door to the kitchen behind her and quickly fell backward against the wall, out of Harrow’s sight.
She’s right, she thought as she pinched her eyes shut, trying to prevent the tears that were threatening to break free.
But so am I. I can’t hurt someone again. I can’t hurt like that again.
Sighing, she pushed herself off the wall and began pulling ingredients from her cupboards.
She began to lose herself in the motions, recalling memories of cooking with LoLo.
Tobin’s stress notoriously melted away when enjoying LoLo’s heirloom recipes, ones she had begun bestowing upon her since she was old enough to hold a wooden spoon, kneading and folding them into Tobin’s DNA like a careful dough.
As her mind and body were overtaken with the artistry of prep, action and plating, Tobin felt her anxieties boil into the eggs she was poaching and steam away.
Tobin was musing on a recent mission, cleaning in an avoidant silence inside the hangar when Eddie’s careful, sultry voice cut through the stillness. “Are you going to make me force it from you? I thought Nadia was helping you open up.”
They’d received the call for the mission two days ago.
The local sheriff ’s department had begun preliminary searches for a young post-grad student lost while researching mushrooms, but the rugged terrain and time elapsed since last known contact meant they requested aerial surveillance from Parrish Aerial.
Using the coordinates from the student’s last known location and the latest cell signal, Eddie isolated a one-mile radius with her proprietary AI search-and-rescue software.
Dense tree cover limited visibility from above, making the ground team’s instructions abstract and the search zones nearly inaccessible.
Hours were spent hovering over potential locations, waiting for crews to reach each sector.
Valuable time slipped away, frustration mounting with each passing minute.
After countless hours of flight, copious amounts of coffee, and a plethora of muttered curses, the student was found lodged inside a hollowed tree, delirious from exposure.
Back in the hangar, Tobin exhaled sharply.
“There has to be a better way. We have to reach these people faster. The software narrows our search from miles to meters, but in a forest this dense, we’re still trapped.
Stalled. Ineffective. We got lucky today—but how many times have we fallen short?
And how many more?” She paused, kneeling on her haunches, staring through the helicopter frame.
“The forest is beautiful… but it hides its victims too well. Even if we find them, reaching them is often another challenge entirely.”
“Blur,” Eddie said sympathetically. “Sometimes our best is still inadequate.” She continued delicately.
“In most cases, we save countless hours of searching in the wrong direction or over too broad an area. The software hyper-focuses on the most probable zones, and that alone is a huge win. We didn’t get lucky today; we applied technology and logic to isolate, locate, and recover a victim.
She’ll lead a full, gloriously fungus-filled life because of us.
I know it’s frustrating. We both know that this career has more lows than highs. But today? We won. Take the W.”
Tobin growled in resignation. She knew Eddie was right. She needed to let it go. Shaking her limbs, she bounced on the tips of her toes, forcing the tension out of her body.
Eddie recognized this cue. “Alexa! Play Shake It Off!”
As the anthem poured from the speakers, they found their rhythm, belting the lyrics across the hangar and dancing through the remainder of the cleaning.
Quietly, but without prelude, Eddie interrupted their antics. “Did you call the doctor yet?”
Tobin bristled, immediately retreating behind her protective walls. “Wasn’t planning on it. Thanks for putting her back in my thoughts, though. I’d just managed to chase her out, and here you go—decidedly not minding your own business again.”
“I told you I wasn’t going to. It’s a date, Blur. Why are you fighting this so hard? You already know she’ll say yes. There’s no risk,” Eddie’s voice was languid, honey-smooth, effortlessly coaxing.
“Yes, there is a risk. There’s a risk of pain, of heartbreak, and of me wasting valuable hormones when I should be focusing on having a baby.”
“Tobin, not everyone leaves.”
“Says the ‘single by choice’ woman to my right,” Tobin mocked, her patience thinning.
“I am single by choice. But I still date. It’s usually just dinner and sex—because that’s all I want.
I’m not looking to partner. I’m happy with no commitment beyond a single night.
But you’re not. You’ve got settled, monogamous, and vanilla written all of you.
I’m just tired of watching you fight it.
Find her. Marry her. Live happily ever after. It’s not as hard as you think it is.”
“Fuck you. I’m not vanilla.”
“Prove it,” Eddie cooed, cocking one finely scarred eyebrow in challenge.
“Don’t act like you know me,” Tobin grumbled under her breath.
“I do know you. Honestly—better than you know yourself lately. I know you’re an amazing pilot, and an incredibly skilled rescuer. I know you’re my best friend. I know you’re loyal to a fault, and stubborn beyond what’s healthy.”
“You’re redeeming yourself. Keep going,” Tobin quipped, letting a sliver of arrogance slip through her veneer.
“I know you’re unhappy under your surface. And that you want nothing more than a loyal, monogamous, un-vanilla partner to come home to every night. Get out of your own way, Blur.”
“Why is everyone suddenly so set on me finding a partner? Jesus! Between LoLo, Harrow, and you pressuring me, I’m tempted to take a mail-order bride at first chance just to get you off my back.”
Eddie snorted. “Skip the mail-order, plenty of women Stateside would happily crawl on your back. Firstly: Dr. Savage.”
“Enough!” Tobin erupted. “I’m done with all of you pressuring me over one afternoon of flirting. I’m never going to see her again. I have an appointment with the reproductive endocrinologist in nine weeks. I’m having a baby. Without a partner. Drop. It.”
“It’s dropped,” Eddie placated her. A few seconds later, she added, “I’m proud of you. Is Harrow going with? Do you need me to go?”
Still infuriated from her outburst, Tobin slowed and deepened her breathing before she could answer. “Harrow is coming. But thank you. It means a lot.”
“I’m proud of you for taking that step. I know you’ve been drawing it out a bit lately. And, regardless, I’m declaring myself a de facto auntie to whatever you pop out. Prepare now for all the spoiling a rich, childless auntie can bestow!” She laughed maniacally. Somehow, it was still smooth.
“If we weren’t on the clock, I’d throw something at you.”
Returning to her more natural reserved temperament, Eddie challenged. “Hmmm, I don’t think you would.”
Quieter, Tobin added. “Thank you. For real. I want this child to feel love from whomever is willing to give it. Spoiling and all.”
“It will, Blur. It will.”