Chapter 68 You won’t remember me
You won't remember me
Cadel
The Alpha Of Winter
The Anarchy Wolf
Present Day
I’m staring into the burning red eyes of the Ravage wolf, but my head is elsewhere. I’m fighting it, but it’s pulling me under.
The All-Seer is standing in a corridor that is normally empty with an omega beside her. The petitions have finished for the day, and I’m just wandering around, seeking the answers from elsewhere.
The omega has long black hair and skin, and eyes that glitter like they have stars in them. She’s beautiful, and when she moves, she has so much grace.
They turn as if I’ve called them.
I recognise her. The Goddess of Night. Why is she here? Why with the seer?
She smiles, lifting her hand and waving at me.
“What are you doing here?”
She glances at the All-Seer, still with a smile on her face. “High Alpha,” she says and dips her head. “Helping.”
I look between them. “Helping?”
“Yes, I’m going to help.”
The All-Seer smiles like she’s doing some amazing thing, but I’m just confused.
“Good luck, Alpha.”
“Good luck?”
Someone calls my name. I turn away. When I turn back, she’s gone, and the All-Seer is walking away. I try to catch up, but I can’t find her anywhere.
Taryn? Taryn is the Goddess of Night, and she knew…she knew I was coming here? What does that mean? I fight to stay as the Ravage Wolf crouches, but I’m ripped away again.
Her hair is the deepest, most intense fiery red I’ve ever seen, and when she smiles at me, it doesn’t meet her eyes. She’s sad, heartbroken. We don’t lose gods. This is unprecedented.
Where have they all disappeared to?
I push the heavy stone key into the lock and swing the massive double doors open. It’s a room so deep in the Hall of Petitions that no one even knows it’s here, but I found it.
She walks in, and I follow close behind.
“Will it work?”
She glances back at me and smiles. “I was the High Beta for a while.”
“I remember,” I murmur respectfully.
“I hated it.”
I don’t say anything. She turns back to the massive room. It’s got stone tables and natural lighting from the glowing quartz on the walls. It’s a bit cold, but that’s common in rooms this deep in the Hall.
“It’s perfect.”
“It has what you need?” I ask.
“Yes. Please, don’t tell anyone anything.”
“Of course, not. From one High Alpha to a High Beta, it will be our secret.”
She ducks her head.
“Call me Sorcha.”
“Sorcha? It’s nice to officially meet you. I am sorry for the last time we met. I call myself Cadel.”
Flames flicker through her hair, but they’re dim as if they are going out.
Sorcha? Jarek’s sister was involved in this?
I slam into the wall, holding the wolf back. It bares its teeth at me, saliva runs into my fur as it snaps its teeth dangerously close to my face. Growling and hissing.
Get a grip! Stay. Here, I command myself.
It works for two seconds. Until it doesn’t.
He catches my upper arm and smiles widely.
“I’m sorry, do I know you?”
My temper presses on me, but I smother it. I’ve got a job to do. If I do it, I can see her again.
“I’m the Alpha of Night, and I just wanted to introduce myself before I go.”
“Go where?” I bark, seizing on his words.
He shakes his head and leans in so we’re cheek-to-cheek.
“Remember me, Alpha. You have to remember me.”
Then he pulls free and disappears..
When I look up, I see the All-Seer watching me with sad eyes.
Kendric! I moan in my mind. He was a god?
His whispers are ringing in my ears, and his words are mixing everything inside out.
I didn’t know. I didn’t remember.
Why didn’t I remember?
How could I have forgotten?
The Alpha of Air is arrogant and barely looks me in the eye. He’s too busy looking around the room with those cornflower blue eyes of his.
“I wanted to be the High Alpha.” He says it with a curiously detached and amused voice. “Some things are just not meant to be.”
“Are you all right, Alpha?” I ask acidly.
“I just came to see it, just once.”
I sit up. It’s been a year since the last one disappeared.
“Where are you going?”
“It’s all right; we’ll see you there. You’re coming, too.”
“Coming where? How? When?” I circle the desk, trying to keep up with him as he paces away from me, using his gift to move him faster across the distance.
“We all have to do our part. It’s part of the journey; it's part of the sacrifice. Everyone has a part to play.”
“What is your part?”
“I have many roles to play, but they are all equally important. All of us are.”
“Are what?” I ask in frustration.
“Goodbye, Alpha Winter. When we meet again, we won’t know each other, but know that I go doing my best. It is my honor and privilege to serve. And perhaps this is better than being High Alpha, after all.”
“You stupid bastard!” I shout in my mind as I roar into the Ravage Wolf’s face and throw him away. Theo is the Alpha of Air, and he did that…he died like that for this. Because of this.
We all have a part to play?
The Ravage Wolf twists away and then surges back towards me. I knock him back. He hits the ground and springs up, charging me.
I hate him. I hate what they’ve all done.
The Alpha is sitting cross-legged on my desk, his eyes closed. He’s got flowers and vines woven through his hair. I glower at him as I get close.
Spring and Winter seldom get along.
“Why are you on my desk and not on one of the chairs?”
“Why sit on a chair? What’s the point?”
“The point is that you keep your filthy ass off the place where I eat my food,” I say acidly and lean against my desk so I can look down on him.
He opens his eyes and laughs. “Still just as grumpy as ever.”
“You sit there and answer prayers all day every day and tell me you don’t get bored.”
“Aww, poor winter baby.”
“I’m going to lock you in a block of ice.”
He flutters his lashes and then gets all serious.
“Winter, do you remember the time you saw that omega, you know the one you were looking for? Did you ever find her?”
Everything in me goes cold. “No, I never did find her.”
“Did you ever wonder where she was?”
“I know where she is. She’s on Earth. She gave up her powers, became a weapon to save the humans and preserve their peace,” I say bitterly.
“I,” he stops, looking at me strangely. “I love my Night Alpha.”
It’s so rare for gods to love that I find myself captivated by the soft expression on his face.
“I don’t want to go.”
“So, don’t go.”
“I have to; it’s the only way to save him.”
He lunges for my hands, squeezing them. “Please, can you make sure that he’s okay? Just look after him. Please? I haven’t been able to find him for ages.”
“Where are you going?” I ask sharply.
He shakes his head; a tear runs down his cheek. “We have to try. If we don’t…oh, gods, if we don’t…” he fades from sight in front of me. Just fades away.
Gods can’t do that.
I search for him everywhere, but I never find him. I never find any of them, and then I stop looking.
I let out a roar, raking my claws down the Ravage Wolf's face. Marshall! He was part of this?
How did I not see them? How did I not know them?
The Ravage Wolf attacks me again, but I turn at the last minute and hurl it into the wall. The tin shakes, sounding like thunder.
Keres calls my name. I look up and see her, but she vanishes from my sight like so long ago.
He walks in with the All-Seer, and I freeze, staring at him because it’s impossible. After all this time, to find out now that he—I cut off my thoughts and roughly slide out of my seat, marching towards them.
“Who are you?” I ask rudely.
He looks at me with deep reproach. “I am the Luna Alpha.”
“There’s not one!” I snap.
“There’s always been one,” he growls back, glancing at the All-Seer as if to ask if I’m for real.
“But you look so similar,” I mutter and turn away. “I’m going insane.”
“Twins.”
Twins?
“Two gods born from a single energy force. The moon is both male and female; it’s of a dual nature. You needed alpha energy to create alphas and omega to create omegas. Our combined energy created betas.” His elaborate explanation is said without arrogance.
I turn back slowly. “That would make you our origin gods?”
He shrugs. “We just helped what would have happened eventually. A little energy here, a little there.”
He’s got a much calmer energy than I have, and I get the impression from his stilted conversation that he’s not terribly good at talking to people.
“Where is she?” I snap, my fury returning.
“She’s gone, doing her duty. Protecting her people.”
“I want to go there, to her,” I say to him and the All-Seer.
He raises his eyebrows. “You would give up immortality? Give up this life and your powers for her?”
“Yes!” I say at once.
The Luna Alpha rubs his chin, thinking it over. His long white hair blows in the wind, and he looks over his shoulder, his expression troubled.
“He followed,” he says to the All-Seer.
“I know,” she says, looking at me. “Say goodbye to the Alpha. He’s going to make sure she stays alive.”
“What?”
“That’s his job, to keep her alive until the right moment.”
I stare at them. “She’s in danger? Let me go, too. What do you mean, right moment? I’ll keep her safe!”
The All-Seer shakes her head. “It’s not your time.”
“Why is it not? Why can’t I go? I have searched for her for thousands of human years. I have loved her for every second of them.”
“Because if you go too soon, she dies,” the All-Seer says in exasperation.
“Why are you telling me this now?” I ask after a strangled pause.
“Because when I go, you won’t remember any of this. Everyone who came to speak to you will disappear from your mind.” She holds up a hand, interrupting me before I can speak. “You will remember at the right moment.”
The Luna Alpha smiles, and I see her in him.
“Goodbye, High Alpha. Do not fail.”
He smiles and steps out of sight. I turn around, checking everywhere, but he’s gone.
The All-Seer stares at me, but I don’t think she’s waiting for me.
I shift into a person and hold the Ravage Wolf back, his teeth too close to my face.
“You’re her twin!” I shout, slamming him to the ground. “You’re the oldest, the strongest, kick this piece of crap out of you!”
Walker howls, and the agony is both his and the wolf's. She ruined him. That was the evil of it. She took the oldest, most beautiful alpha, and she put evil in him and made him do evil. I don’t think he’s ever going to be the same.
He’s never going to go home.
“You fell, didn’t you? You gave it all up to save her?”
In the red of the Ravage Wolf’s eyes, I see my answer.
“Damn you, Walker. Not like this. You’re not going like this.”
He rushes around the corner, glowing, his dark hair flowing around him like an inky sheet, but he’s beautiful.
“Omega Stars,” the All-Seer says in frustration.
“Send me with him.”
“No.”
“Send me with him!” he demands, full of cocky command.
“I won’t do it.”
“I’m not going to exist anywhere without him!” he cries out. “He’s mine. My alpha.”
She pauses, looking at him. “If you go, you will suffer horribly alongside him. He does not wish this for you. You will never be together for but a mere handful of minutes in every lifetime. You will never find your happiness.”
The omega staggers, looks down, and then lifts his head, tears shining in his eyes.
“But I will have those minutes, right? We’d be together?”
She stares at him.
I stare at him.
“Send him.”
She looks at me.
“Please, for all that you have put me through, have mercy on him. Minutes are enough. Sometimes a second is enough.”
He disappears, and I stare at her.
“Goodbye, High Alpha of Winter. It will be a long wait, and it’s going to hurt you, but trust me. At the end of the road, she will be there waiting for you. If you think minutes are enough for you, then you will be happy, for that is all I can give you.”
“Minutes are enough. I just want her back,” I say, my throat tight.
She nods. “Be strong. The time is coming.”
The All-Seer reaches out and puts a hand on my head.
Images slam into me. Red hair, a wicked smile, a laugh that makes my stomach flutter.
He’s lithe but powerful, and I want to protect him.
The images change. I see a powerful alpha with a deep, aggressive calm about him.
I’m a little in awe of him, a little in love with him.
His hair is like a sheet of black water.
“I’ve keyed these images into your brain. You’ll see them and recognise them as people to trust. There are her scent matches. They will be with her. Do not hurt them.”
“They are mine,” I say, hearing the truth of those words as it echoes around, and the memory drips away.
“They were mine!” I scream into his face. “They were mine! I know how you feel because they were mine!”
The Ravage Wolf snaps his teeth, but I punch him in the face.
Jarek. Mordecai.
Legion, who gave up everything for minutes.
And the All-Seer who gave birth to Kaida Keres, who lived and suffered, lived and died so she would survive.
“They were mine!” I scream.
The pain rips me apart, and my wolf tears its way free.
As the Anarchy Wolf, I snarl at the Ravage Wolf and make a silent promise: one way or another, my Kaida will live.