3. Rami #2
“Not exactly,” I said slowly. I didn’t want to hide that I was his mate, but equally, he didn’t seem to be taking this all that well.
Dumping a lifelong commitment on top of everything else might be the straw that broke the camel’s back.
I decided to go with a half-truth. “I sensed you were in danger and made it here just in time.”
“That just leaves me with more questions.” He sighed, rubbing his hands together once more. “I guess I should be saying thank you.”
“You don’t need to thank me.” I nudged his shoulder with mine. “But if you wanted to, you could agree to come to dinner with me tomorrow night.”
His green eyes opened wide. “Like a date?”
“Yes,” I said, holding his gaze steadily. I didn’t want there to be any misunderstandings here. “Exactly like a date. I’d like nothing more than to get to know you better, Ethan.”
His lips parted in shock. “Really? Um, shit. Wow. I’m super flattered, but…”
I didn’t even hear the rest of his sentence over the ringing in my ears. I didn’t need to. They were the same words I’d heard spoken time and time again.
Surely though…surely fate wouldn’t be so cruel.
“Sorry,” I said, unsure how I was even able to speak. “Can you repeat that?”
“I have a boyfriend,” Ethan said again with a sheepish smile. “In fact, he should be here any minute now. Thank fuck he didn’t arrive earlier. He’d have been worried sick to see me on the road like that. Devastated, even.”
Well, his boyfriend and I had something in common.
Aside from Ethan, of course.
I pasted on a smile. It wasn’t Ethan’s fault that fate had made him mine. He was perfectly entitled to choose another. He didn’t need to know that he, a literal stranger, was shattering all my hopes for the future. “In that case, I’ll leave you to it.”
“Wait.” He reached out to touch my wrist. I froze immediately, every cell already programmed to do this man’s bidding. “Will I…will I see you again?”
My throat bobbed. Once. Twice. “Would you like that?”
He gave a small shrug, his eyes darting away. “I could always use more friends.”
His words ripped the breath from my lungs. No, it wasn’t his words, it was his tone, so full of aching loneliness that it had me wanting to wrap him in my arms and never leave his side again.
My reaction had me hesitating too long. Before I could speak, Ethan was getting to his feet. He shoved his hands into his pockets and gave me a small smile. “Actually, forget I said anything. It’s probably best that we don’t stay in touch.”
I frowned. How could he possibly think that? I got that he was in a relationship, but not wanting to ever see me again? Did he not feel the same pull I did?
“Dave should be almost here,” he said, shifting awkwardly. “But thank you. Truly.”
He was about to leave me. I might never see him again. Suddenly I thought of Sam. Of the danger he’d been put in for knowing about us but not being mated. Fuck. I couldn’t let Ethan be put in the same position. Gloria had been quiet recently, but I wouldn’t put anything past her.
I closed my eyes briefly. I knew what I had to do. Compelling my mate went against all of my instincts. I didn’t want to remove his memories of what had transpired. Of meeting me.
But if it would keep him safe, it was exactly what I’d do. Thank fuck Ferry had shown me how to do it safely. I had no idea if Ethan was neurodivergent like Sam, but at least I knew how to protect him if he was.
“Before you go,” I said, my voice already trembling. “There’s something I need to do first. Something I need to tell you.”
For one minute, one damn minute, I was going to be selfish. I was going to say exactly what I wanted. What I needed.
Before erasing every word from Ethan’s mind.
Ethan’s smile faltered. “Rami, are you okay? What’s wrong?”
I choked on a sob at the injustice of it all. At the confirmation that he too felt that instinctual need to comfort his mate. “Nothing. I just need to tell you something. Is that okay?”
He nodded. “Of course.”
“I found you today because you’re my fated mate. You’re the other half of my soul. The one who’s meant to complete me. The being I’m destined to love and cherish for the rest of eternity.”
There was a stunned silence from Ethan before he spoke a single word. “What?”
I laughed humourlessly, holding up a hand before he could say anything more. “Don’t worry, I know you’ve got a boyfriend. I don’t have any intentions of pursuing anything with you.”
“Even if I believed you,” Ethan said in a tone that told me in no uncertain terms that he didn’t, “why are you telling me?”
“Because soon you won’t remember it.” A tear slid free as the reality fully set in.
I had a mate, but he’d never be mine. “I’m going to give you my mark, which will grant you my strength and protection.
If you’re ever in danger, I’ll be there in a heartbeat.
But other than that? You won’t hear or see me. It’ll be like I never existed to you.”
“Hang on. But—”
“I’m sorry for telling you,” I said, cutting him off. “But I needed to be selfish, just for a minute. Don’t worry, my compulsion is thorough. It won’t hurt.”
It’d just make him forget this. Me.
I kind of wished I could forget too. Never knowing my mate would be better than the agony of meeting him and realising fate had, once again, fucked me over, right?
“I’m just going to place my lips on your forehead,” I said, slowly drawing nearer. “I won’t do anything inappropriate, I promise.”
Ethan was frozen in place, his beautiful lips parted in surprise. I swallowed hard, hating that I’d never get to taste them.
Pull it together, Ramiel.
The worst part was that I’d have to compel him first. Part of having my mark on him meant he wouldn’t be susceptible to compulsion.
Ethan sucked in a breath. “Rami, I —”
My heart cracked anew. I couldn’t hear whatever he was about to say. Not if I was to follow through on my promise.
Instead, I unleashed a wave of power. It worked through his mind, quietly erasing every one of the precious minutes we’d spent together.
Once it was done, I lightly kissed his forehead, gifting him my mark. The ache in my chest eased slightly, knowing my mate bore my mark. That he was protected.
And, when his time on this plane was at an end, so would mine be.
“Take care, Ethan,” I said quietly, breathing him in for the final time. “Be happy.”
Then, I took off into the air.
When I was a safe distance away, I paused, unable to stop myself. I saw with perfect clarity the moment Ethan became aware of his surroundings. How he frowned at the blood on his hands in confusion.
The same blood that was coating me liberally.
He checked himself over for injuries that didn’t exist before shaking his head in bewilderment. Just then, a grey Vauxhall screeched to a halt beside him.
I watched, numb, as a tall, handsome blond got out of the driver’s seat.
I could hear his voice perfectly, but I couldn’t process his words, not when I was too busy focusing on the relief flashing in Ethan’s eyes.
How readily he opened his arms for a hug.
The tension that leeched out of his muscles as his boyfriend held him close.
Held him in a way I’d never be able to.
He’s happy, I told myself firmly. Ethan is happy, and that’s what I want for him.
Even if it wasn’t with me.
My very soul screamed at me, but I forced myself to turn away from the embracing pair. I’d done the right thing; I knew that.
But flying away from the man destined to be mine but in a relationship with someone else, felt anything but right.