Chapter 57 #2
"There was a man," I say again. "He lived in a big city and thought he had everything.
He had the job of his dreams, the apartment of everyone's dreams. He had enough money in the bank to feed a small country for several years.
He had beautiful women who hung on to his every word and who he could take to dinner, lunch, breakfast, whatever, yet he wasn't happy.
He wasn't sad, but he wasn't living. And then one day, along came this woman, sweet, innocent, beguiling, quiet, and she crept into his life unnoticed at first. She was like a butterfly fluttering around, beautiful to see, but never standing still long enough for him to truly appreciate everything that she was.
"And then one day, the butterfly stopped on a leaf, and the man was walking in the garden and stopped to look at the leaf.
He studied her wings and beautiful colors, then she started fluttering around again, going further into the garden.
And this time he didn't just watch her fly away.
He followed her until he came to a waterfall and Eden.
And there she stopped again, and he realized that the life he'd been living was not the life that he wanted or the life he craved.
He wasn't fulfilled. And yet, he didn't know how to tell the butterfly that he wanted more because he was scared that she would just fly away. "
My heart races as I pause. Juniper turns around to look at me. She grasps my face. "Am I the butterfly?" she asks softly.
I stare at her, knowing in that moment that this is so much more than just a story.
This is so much more than a passionate love affair or clandestine lovemaking session.
This is a story for the ages, something that fairy tales are made of, and I am scared.
I’m scared that I’m going to fuck it up because I’m not made for fairy tales and have never believed in them before.
"Are you okay, Remington?" She licks her lips nervously. "I mean, if it was just a story, that's okay."
"You're the butterfly," I say, "and I'm the man."
She nods slowly, a wide, beautiful smile crossing her face. "I'm the butterfly, huh? You're not just saying this because..."
"You know I don't just say things, Juniper.
And I would never say this for any reason other than the truth.
But you know I'm just an infallible man, who's never been in a situation like this, has never felt things like this.
And I can't promise you the world because I don't know if I have it to give you.
And I can't promise you a happily ever after because I don't know if I truly believe they exist."
"I don't need you to promise me the world," she says. "And I love your honesty. None of us ever know if we're going to have a happily ever after, but..." She blinks and looks away.
"What? What's wrong?"
"I don't just want this to be a one-night-wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am thing. I don't want to go into the office on Monday and feel dirty and ashamed. I won't want to keep sending flowers to..."
"Don't you get it, Juniper? There are no more flowers for you to send." I grin. "Unless you want to send flowers to yourself from me. But I think I'd rather pick them up for you myself."
She stares at me in shock. "What?"
"I'm saying that I more than like you, Juniper. I'm falling in love with you. I don't know what this will be, but I know I don't want to see anyone else while I'm trying to figure it out. And I just hope that you like me enough to give me a chance."
"Like you enough? I'm freaking falling in love with you, Remington Parker. How could you not know that? I've had the biggest crush on you forever."
I stare at her in shock. "You're kidding me."
"No, I'm not." She giggles. "You didn't know?"
"How was I supposed to know? You never told me."
"How was I going to tell you? You never even noticed me."
"I never noticed you? Are you kidding me? Why'd you think you got the job?"
"Because I was a plain Jane, and you didn't have to worry that I was going to come on to you."
I stare at her and shake my head. "You really think that?"
She frowns. "I mean, you always told everyone that you're glad that you had me as an assistant because I would never come on to you, and I would never expect anything.”
“But that had nothing to do with how much I was attracted to you, how much I wanted you. Yes, you are absolutely stunning and gorgeous now. But you were always beautiful to me. I mean, maybe I didn’t notice just how beautiful and funny you were at first, but it became apparent to me very quickly.”
“Really?” She grasps my face. “You mean that?”
“I mean it, Juniper. I love you.” My mouth presses together quickly as her eyes widen.
“You mean you think you love me? You’re falling for me, perhaps?"
"No," I say, shaking my head. "I think I was saying that I was falling for you because I don't even know how to process the fact that I've already fallen. I love you, Juniper Hardman. I want you. I need you. And I will wait for you for however long it takes."
"You mean for sex?" She grins. "So if I said I changed my mind about tonight..."
"If you change your mind, then I'm okay with that. I mean, I'd be slightly disappointed, but..."
"I haven't changed my mind." She giggles. "I love you, too. And now, take me, you handsome stud. Because I'm ready and waiting. This has already been the best night of my life, and I want it to become even better."
"You don't have to tell me again," I say as I pick her up and carry her toward the bedroom.
My heart races with love for her, even though there's uncertainty in my stomach.
I'm nervous, maybe even more nervous than when I took the LSAT or when we started the law firm.
More nervous than when I realized I had a child.
I'm scared, but not because I love her, but because I don't know what I would do if I ever lost her.
And I don't know how to process that. I've never loved another person romantically before, so I’ve never had to worry that the love would fade, but I know that I would do whatever it takes to keep Juniper in my life.
As I lay her down on my bed and look down into her sweet smile and beguiling eyes, I know that I don't want to let this woman go.
I don't want her to just be my assistant, my friend, or my girlfriend. I know that I want this woman to be my wife. I want her to be mine forever. And I’m going to let her know in no uncertain terms that what we have is forever.